today I want to recognize the territory
on which we live and gather today of the
stalo people who have lived here since
time immemorial the collective title and
rights of the stalo has never been
it is through the laws and respect of
the land and the water and the air and
the non-human beings that the stalo have
survived and thrived throughout the
generations here it is 2017
happy birthday Canada 150 years since
Confederation as a Canadian what does
the highway of tears residential schools
the Truth and Reconciliation Commission
I’d like to share my journey of
relationships that began with one
conversation when speaking of
conversations what was more important
than the first telephone it was the
my journey of relationships this past 20
years in Chilliwack has been supporting
families with young children and
completing my master’s degree in
education the desire of my heart is to
support vulnerable women which the
United Nations says when you support
vulnerable women everything in your
community improves that’s a really good
return on investment the truth of
reconciliation in the 94 calls to action
have really gripped my heart recently in
my role as executive director of the BC
Association of family resource programs
our relationship with the University of
British Columbia’s First Nations
Indigenous Studies program led to
something great we now have our own
statement of reconciliation
so reconciliation
what is it all about justice Maurice and
Clare chair of the Truth and
Reconciliation Commission of Canada says
that reconciliation is not an indigenous
problem but it’s a Canadian problem and
it is about forging and maintaining
respectful relationships and that there
are no shortcuts my journey of
relationships continued as I listened to
reconciliation Canada’s ambassador chief
dr. Robert Joseph he was opening at the
Minerva Foundation for women in June
2016 in Vancouver and he says our future
and the well-being of all our children
rests in the kind of relationships that
we build today the co-chair that day
consultant chastity Davis shared about
the highway of tears and the national
inquiry to the murdered and missing
indigenous women and girls I waited at
the end of the day to talk with chasity
and I shared about our community family
support work and I said maybe there’s a
role we can play in this somehow well a
few months later
chasity and I met for coffee and then in
the fall
our staff attended an amazing training
at Raven Institute we heard stories and
impacts of colonization on indigenous
families from leaders Tara Fraser Kiana
Alexander chasidy Davis and Monique
gray-smith when chasity and Tara shared
we are women of mixed heritage we are
the colonized and we are the colonizers
the energy shifted in the room
chasidy and Tara built a bridge for
everyone in the room to meet on it was
fantastic Raven Institute teaches base
your life on love and start a
conversation that builds a relationship
to move reconciliation to action it’s
fantastic and at the end of the day I
was sitting with a corporate executive
and he says with everything I learned
here today how will I teach my two and
four year old children well one
possibility is to come to a Family
Resource Program parents and caregivers
with their babies and toddlers have come
to Family Resource programs for
friendship education and support for
over 45 years family place or Family
Center might be a more common name that
you would know family centers are
communities of practice that build
relationship and celebrate the day to
day of parenting if you imagine a
rhizome like Solomon seal or mint it can
help you understand how this
the staff the Family Center staff our
Child and Family Development experts
yeah where what grows more fruit is how
they interact and connect with the
parents kindness and care is at the
heart of this work family the Family
Center model mirrors many indigenous
values such as respect humor
strength-based and inclusion an
inclusion means there’s room for
everyone now you might be thinking why
does reconciliation matter to me well I
see it as a matter of love and care for
the minds of our next generation do you
know when your brain grows the most it’s
from the time you’re born till you’re
about three or four years old and your
environment and your loving connections
makes all the difference in your good
health or not
if you experience a bad event trauma
during this high-growth time your brain
pathways basically essentially put on
alert and this alarm state can
negatively affect you for the rest of
your life leaving you in a very rough
place doctor child psychologist dr.
Vanessa Lapointe brings us some good
news
she says the science of child neuro
development says we can inspire
resilience through connection meaning
that a loving and attentive parent can
boost their child’s health and
resilience it’s great news really good
news now on the other hand for 120 years
a hundred and fifty thousand indigenous
children experienced trauma when they
were separated from their parents and
the Truth and Reconciliation Commission
of Canada heard indigenous people tell
their stories of hunger physical and
sexual abuse 6,000 children died while
living at 139 schools studies show the
ripple effect of intergenerational
trauma this means today many indigenous
families are suffering from trauma that
their parent or their grandparent
healing can include the medicine of love
and safe relationships mmm iw do you
know what this acronym stands for so
this is short for murdered and missing
indigenous women and girls spurred on by
the United Nations declaration on the
rights of indigenous peoples Canadian
Prime Minister Justin Trudeau called for
a national inquiry to the murdered and
missing indigenous women and girls in
2015 the 4,000 murdered and missing
indigenous women and girls include those
who have traveled on British Columbia’s
highway of tears highway 16 indigenous
women and their families are
disproportionately impacted by racism
sexism and colonialism says patty had
jus Minister for the status of women we
need to hear their voices she says and
young minds in our community are
listening so reconciliation is about
relationships and it matters because it
points to the injustice but how do we
move toward reconciliation how are we
gonna do that
well conversation relationships and
action the City of Vancouver took action
and proclaimed 2014 as a year of
reconciliation
in an effort to heal from the past and
build new relationships in 2016 Gore
Downey of the band tragically hip
this is a story of 12 year old Chani
when Jack and he’s running through the
forest it’s wintertime and he’s run away
from residential school he’s trying to
find his way home
but Chani dies trying that’s October
22nd 1966 I never knew Chani but I’ll
always love him his story is Canada’s
story says gordoni we must become one
and find a path of reconciliation
together forever
so conversation relationship and action
so in the same way my conversation with
chasity led me to the University of
British Columbia’s First Nations
indigenous study program and in the fall
our staff developed a relationship with
student Danielle Krejci and based on
Danielle’s research and literature
review in 2017
Danielle wrote our statement of
reconciliation and we are so grateful
the next step in our journey will be to
live by the promises that we’ve
collected in our statement of
reconciliation and to share our work
with whoever would be interested what a
great time to be alive quoting Helen
Keller I am only one but I am still one
I can’t do everything but I can do
something so if I were to blue sky to
dream of where these relationships and
conversations would lead us to I see
that we’re all together and everyone is
healthy and we’re in safe and loving
ways and we’re at peace because we are
one we are one human race
and here in this community and here in
British Columbia and here in Canada we
can find the good road together and make
our history together Rabin Institute
taught us to base our life on love and
start a conversation I invite you today
to find someone start a conversation and
ask what do we want to learn about
reconciliation maybe your smile will win
reconciliation is here now and stands
with outstretched hands to you and to me
find someone today and have a
conversation because we have the love to do this