for Muslims the Muslims the Muslims
these days you can’t turn on the TV read
the headlines or scroll through Facebook
without hearing about the Muslims I’m
raising three children all now teenagers
all going through the British education
system all calling themselves Muslim
knowing about the Muslims it’s part of
my life and I work in a British Muslim
charity I head up strategy policy and
research knowing about the Muslims is
part of my job those who aren’t Muslim
can feel out numbered there are so many
Muslim schoolchildren in the UK one in
every 12 one in every 12 and some people
think they are making so many demands
the Chief Inspector of Ofsted UK’s
official school standards body publicly
commented about the demands being voiced
by Muslims with school-aged children
commenting they were loud she said
giving way to the loudest voices is the
opposite of Tolerance giving way to the
loudest voices it’s the opposite of
Tolerance so what are these loud demands
being voiced by Muslim school children
should we give way to them should we
tolerate them well I’ve run focus groups
for Muslim school children aged 10 to 18
all of them minorities as Muslims in
their school boys girls a mix of ethnic
backgrounds I asked them about their
experiences surely I would find
everything is fine in our schools
I listened they told me it turns out
they really wanted three things the
first thing was understanding
understanding from other children that
they and their faith were really not so
different
one example is Christmas children
challenge them why are you having fun at
Christmas you don’t believe in Jesus
well actually they do believe in
peace upon him and in the miracle of his
birth but they’re right it’s not their
festival but they do have time off at
Christmas like every single child in the
UK and so many around the world and like
so many children all around the world
they have time off and they want to
spend that time having fun with family
and friends they’re not so different
another example is different opinions
these are children they’re teenagers
they don’t agree with their parents half
the time let alone the other 1.6 billion
Muslims in the world they’re not so
different so they’re looking for
understanding the second thing the
children really wanted was empathy
empathy they want children to view all
children as equals you can see some
other izing in jokes about groups of
people now when I was younger I used to
make jokes about groups of people we all
did
jokes about Englishman Irishman and
Scotsman the Irish were always the brunt
of them it never crossed my mind it
could be a problem I didn’t go to school
with anybody who is Irish I didn’t have
any Irish friends the jokes were always
about the Irish not being the brightest
of the bunch
now these days these days children are
making jokes about groups of people so
often it’s jokes about the Muslims so
often it’s jokes to their face and so
often it’s jokes about blowing people up
so there was Ibrahim a teenage boy from
the focus groups who explained he was
walking to his classroom one day the day
after the Paris bombings to find a boy
in his class greeted him with the words
it didn’t take you long to get back from
Paris and then there was AK Zack another
teenager who went with his school on a
school trip to the Royal Air Force
Museum as he passed
the bomb-making display a boy in his
class surreptitiously took a photo of
him next to that display sent it around
to the the to those children in their
form within one day that joke had gone
viral across the year groups children
are picking up on other izing they are
seeing happening however inadvertently
in school and outside it and what’s
happening all too often it’s when
children do accept a Muslim child as one
of us the conversation typically goes
along the lines of you’re all right you
are you’re not like the others as that
Muslim child is more more accepted they
are more more humanized and seen less
and less like one of the others some
children are oblivious to all of this
completely oblivious it’s their normal
but others are affected and they are
deeply affected they react in different
ways there are some children who
consciously turn a blind eye like Sarah
who told me I just laugh it off and then
there are those who choose to hide their
faith they don’t want to come out with
it they don’t want to draw attention
like Hannah who told me when drink is
being passed around at parties she says
I don’t like the taste using that as an
excuse rather than mentioning her faith
and then there are those children who
feel they have to respond to everything
like Adam who chipped in it’s horrific I
asked him what’s horrific he said it’s
horrific feeling like I have to defend
1.6 billion people this is a teenager
and then Ben Lau went even further
saying I find myself defending anyone
who is the underdog because I can
imagine how they feel so great things
are coming from these challenges the
children are championing the
marginalized
they are developing resilience they are
striving to be great role models and
they’re keeping up with sports friends
snapchat even the occasional bit of
schoolwork
but they’re feeling exhausted so some
we’re turning a blind eye some were
hiding their faith some were responding
to everything but almost all understood
and excused the jokes and the hurtful
comments Sofia
summed it up when she graciously
observed they’re very nice people it’s
just not part of their frame of
reference it’s what comes with the
territory of being different so the
children were looking for understanding
and empathy and thirdly freedom they
wanted the freedom to bring their whole
selves to school without judgement for
example prayer these children prayed at
home but most of them did not feel able
to ask for a space to pray at school one
girl did and was given a space albeit a
really public and busy one another girl
found it worked really well to use for
sickroom at lunchtime most didn’t want
to cause a scene
now great schools know the value of calm
of silence of peacefulness for their
students in their busy lives so they
hold meditation weeks they run wellness
classes they have yoga sessions prayer
doesn’t have to take long if you’re
quick you can do it in three minutes
does finding a time and place for prayer
really have to be that hard
and then there’s fasting when I was
growing up many of us observed Lent
giving up something we really loved well
I say many of us did I gave up something
I really hated rice pudding I just found
those school dinner ladies weren’t very
supportive but many children now are
Muslim children are observing the month
of Ramadan they’re fasting and they’re
actually finding that the teachers and
secondary schools are very encouraging
and it’s not only the teachers alina
recounted my friend said i rate that so
much having that self-restraint the
students are encouraging too I’ve
mentioned prayer
and fasting I haven’t mentioned modest
dress it turned out to be not much of an
issue
some girls wore trousers some more
longer skirts some wore the uniform as
it was ah but you’re thinking perhaps
what about the scarf the hijab many
didn’t wear it some did one girl who
wanted to wear it approached her
headmistress with trepidation and was
amazed to find that her head teacher
immediately accepted her personal choice
but I’ve heard Ofsted officials experts
and the general public challenge is it
really a choice
well what about David wearing a Jewish
skullcap the Kippur it’s that a choice
or is he influenced by parents friends
society what about ash wearing a turban
is that a choice or is he influenced by
parents friends society and what about
Paul wanting to be called pauline and
wear a skirt is that a choice or are
they influenced by parents friends
society not one of us lives in a vacuum
and neither do they but these children
want to be free to bring them whole
selves to school as far as possible
without judgment this goes beyond the
Muslims these are my children your
children our children seeking
understanding empathy and freedom so
what can we do to help these diverse
children be fully accepted the great
British public were asked how can
Muslims integrate three answers scored
highly in third place we have ban the
burqa that full body and face veil the
French counted how many women wore it
before they banned it three hundred and
sixty-seven in the whole of France turns
out to be less than point zero two
percent of the population not a big
issue so in second place we have monitor
Islamic faith schools more closely again
hardly any Muslim school children are
affected
only 5% of children go to these schools
and actually some of them are doing
rather well if you look at progress 8 a
national league table measuring student
progress of the top of the top three
schools two of them are taken by Islamic
faith schools so we have the number one
answer to help Muslims integrate in this
country make it compulsory for everyone
to speak English look I completely agree
isn’t it helpful if we all speak the
language of the country in which we live
but what did the statistics show well if
you look at Pakistanis and Bangladeshis
who are the two main groups of Muslims
living in England it turns out that 94
percent of the young adults in England
aren’t speaking English so let’s look at
the comparator for white and mixed Oh
it’s lower but then when I see the kind
of conversations that I’m having with my
young adults in my family I wonder are
any of our young adults really speaking
English these days and I’m the one on
the right in case you’re wondering
so with signing the burqa monitoring
Islamic faith schools and making it
compulsory to speak English on our red
herrings what is the answer to helping
all our children feel fully accepted and
to accommodate their demands their wants
and their needs let’s start with freedom
the practical one let’s support our
children whether they want to meditate
be mindful or to pray whatever they want
to observe Lent or fast during Ramadan
and if they want to express their
identity through dress let’s support
them in that as far as we can and
importantly let’s not judge them for
their choices and when it comes to
empathy let’s help our children view all
children as equals but if we’re going to
talk about the Irish as being less
bright than us then it’s not surprising
if our child will too and if we’re going
to talk about Muslims blowing people up
then it’s not surprising if our child
will too
and if we view any group or any
individual as being lesser than us
lesser beings lesser Schumann’s then
it’s not surprising if our child will
too and finally understanding let’s help
our children realize that no one is so
different Joe Cox
the MP tragically killed in an act of
hatred famously said we have far more in
common than that which divides us let’s
find out what we have in common
reach out make friends let’s seek to
really understand that which divides us
but let’s go further than that let’s
recognize it’s not our differences that
divide us differences make our lives
richer and our whole society stronger
understanding empathy freedom all our
children have demands wants and needs
some voice them loudly some voice them
quietly some don’t voice them at all
let’s not feel we are giving way to them
let’s not just tolerate them let’s make
it easy for them some of it’s within my
power some of its within yours and all of its within hours thank you
these days you can’t turn on the TV read
the headlines or scroll through Facebook
without hearing about the Muslims I’m
raising three children all now teenagers
all going through the British education
system all calling themselves Muslim
knowing about the Muslims it’s part of
my life and I work in a British Muslim
charity I head up strategy policy and
research knowing about the Muslims is
part of my job those who aren’t Muslim
can feel out numbered there are so many
Muslim schoolchildren in the UK one in
every 12 one in every 12 and some people
think they are making so many demands
the Chief Inspector of Ofsted UK’s
official school standards body publicly
commented about the demands being voiced
by Muslims with school-aged children
commenting they were loud she said
giving way to the loudest voices is the
opposite of Tolerance giving way to the
loudest voices it’s the opposite of
Tolerance so what are these loud demands
being voiced by Muslim school children
should we give way to them should we
tolerate them well I’ve run focus groups
for Muslim school children aged 10 to 18
all of them minorities as Muslims in
their school boys girls a mix of ethnic
backgrounds I asked them about their
experiences surely I would find
everything is fine in our schools
I listened they told me it turns out
they really wanted three things the
first thing was understanding
understanding from other children that
they and their faith were really not so
different
one example is Christmas children
challenge them why are you having fun at
Christmas you don’t believe in Jesus
well actually they do believe in
peace upon him and in the miracle of his
birth but they’re right it’s not their
festival but they do have time off at
Christmas like every single child in the
UK and so many around the world and like
so many children all around the world
they have time off and they want to
spend that time having fun with family
and friends they’re not so different
another example is different opinions
these are children they’re teenagers
they don’t agree with their parents half
the time let alone the other 1.6 billion
Muslims in the world they’re not so
different so they’re looking for
understanding the second thing the
children really wanted was empathy
empathy they want children to view all
children as equals you can see some
other izing in jokes about groups of
people now when I was younger I used to
make jokes about groups of people we all
did
jokes about Englishman Irishman and
Scotsman the Irish were always the brunt
of them it never crossed my mind it
could be a problem I didn’t go to school
with anybody who is Irish I didn’t have
any Irish friends the jokes were always
about the Irish not being the brightest
of the bunch
now these days these days children are
making jokes about groups of people so
often it’s jokes about the Muslims so
often it’s jokes to their face and so
often it’s jokes about blowing people up
so there was Ibrahim a teenage boy from
the focus groups who explained he was
walking to his classroom one day the day
after the Paris bombings to find a boy
in his class greeted him with the words
it didn’t take you long to get back from
Paris and then there was AK Zack another
teenager who went with his school on a
school trip to the Royal Air Force
Museum as he passed
the bomb-making display a boy in his
class surreptitiously took a photo of
him next to that display sent it around
to the the to those children in their
form within one day that joke had gone
viral across the year groups children
are picking up on other izing they are
seeing happening however inadvertently
in school and outside it and what’s
happening all too often it’s when
children do accept a Muslim child as one
of us the conversation typically goes
along the lines of you’re all right you
are you’re not like the others as that
Muslim child is more more accepted they
are more more humanized and seen less
and less like one of the others some
children are oblivious to all of this
completely oblivious it’s their normal
but others are affected and they are
deeply affected they react in different
ways there are some children who
consciously turn a blind eye like Sarah
who told me I just laugh it off and then
there are those who choose to hide their
faith they don’t want to come out with
it they don’t want to draw attention
like Hannah who told me when drink is
being passed around at parties she says
I don’t like the taste using that as an
excuse rather than mentioning her faith
and then there are those children who
feel they have to respond to everything
like Adam who chipped in it’s horrific I
asked him what’s horrific he said it’s
horrific feeling like I have to defend
1.6 billion people this is a teenager
and then Ben Lau went even further
saying I find myself defending anyone
who is the underdog because I can
imagine how they feel so great things
are coming from these challenges the
children are championing the
marginalized
they are developing resilience they are
striving to be great role models and
they’re keeping up with sports friends
snapchat even the occasional bit of
schoolwork
but they’re feeling exhausted so some
we’re turning a blind eye some were
hiding their faith some were responding
to everything but almost all understood
and excused the jokes and the hurtful
comments Sofia
summed it up when she graciously
observed they’re very nice people it’s
just not part of their frame of
reference it’s what comes with the
territory of being different so the
children were looking for understanding
and empathy and thirdly freedom they
wanted the freedom to bring their whole
selves to school without judgement for
example prayer these children prayed at
home but most of them did not feel able
to ask for a space to pray at school one
girl did and was given a space albeit a
really public and busy one another girl
found it worked really well to use for
sickroom at lunchtime most didn’t want
to cause a scene
now great schools know the value of calm
of silence of peacefulness for their
students in their busy lives so they
hold meditation weeks they run wellness
classes they have yoga sessions prayer
doesn’t have to take long if you’re
quick you can do it in three minutes
does finding a time and place for prayer
really have to be that hard
and then there’s fasting when I was
growing up many of us observed Lent
giving up something we really loved well
I say many of us did I gave up something
I really hated rice pudding I just found
those school dinner ladies weren’t very
supportive but many children now are
Muslim children are observing the month
of Ramadan they’re fasting and they’re
actually finding that the teachers and
secondary schools are very encouraging
and it’s not only the teachers alina
recounted my friend said i rate that so
much having that self-restraint the
students are encouraging too I’ve
mentioned prayer
and fasting I haven’t mentioned modest
dress it turned out to be not much of an
issue
some girls wore trousers some more
longer skirts some wore the uniform as
it was ah but you’re thinking perhaps
what about the scarf the hijab many
didn’t wear it some did one girl who
wanted to wear it approached her
headmistress with trepidation and was
amazed to find that her head teacher
immediately accepted her personal choice
but I’ve heard Ofsted officials experts
and the general public challenge is it
really a choice
well what about David wearing a Jewish
skullcap the Kippur it’s that a choice
or is he influenced by parents friends
society what about ash wearing a turban
is that a choice or is he influenced by
parents friends society and what about
Paul wanting to be called pauline and
wear a skirt is that a choice or are
they influenced by parents friends
society not one of us lives in a vacuum
and neither do they but these children
want to be free to bring them whole
selves to school as far as possible
without judgment this goes beyond the
Muslims these are my children your
children our children seeking
understanding empathy and freedom so
what can we do to help these diverse
children be fully accepted the great
British public were asked how can
Muslims integrate three answers scored
highly in third place we have ban the
burqa that full body and face veil the
French counted how many women wore it
before they banned it three hundred and
sixty-seven in the whole of France turns
out to be less than point zero two
percent of the population not a big
issue so in second place we have monitor
Islamic faith schools more closely again
hardly any Muslim school children are
affected
only 5% of children go to these schools
and actually some of them are doing
rather well if you look at progress 8 a
national league table measuring student
progress of the top of the top three
schools two of them are taken by Islamic
faith schools so we have the number one
answer to help Muslims integrate in this
country make it compulsory for everyone
to speak English look I completely agree
isn’t it helpful if we all speak the
language of the country in which we live
but what did the statistics show well if
you look at Pakistanis and Bangladeshis
who are the two main groups of Muslims
living in England it turns out that 94
percent of the young adults in England
aren’t speaking English so let’s look at
the comparator for white and mixed Oh
it’s lower but then when I see the kind
of conversations that I’m having with my
young adults in my family I wonder are
any of our young adults really speaking
English these days and I’m the one on
the right in case you’re wondering
so with signing the burqa monitoring
Islamic faith schools and making it
compulsory to speak English on our red
herrings what is the answer to helping
all our children feel fully accepted and
to accommodate their demands their wants
and their needs let’s start with freedom
the practical one let’s support our
children whether they want to meditate
be mindful or to pray whatever they want
to observe Lent or fast during Ramadan
and if they want to express their
identity through dress let’s support
them in that as far as we can and
importantly let’s not judge them for
their choices and when it comes to
empathy let’s help our children view all
children as equals but if we’re going to
talk about the Irish as being less
bright than us then it’s not surprising
if our child will too and if we’re going
to talk about Muslims blowing people up
then it’s not surprising if our child
will too
and if we view any group or any
individual as being lesser than us
lesser beings lesser Schumann’s then
it’s not surprising if our child will
too and finally understanding let’s help
our children realize that no one is so
different Joe Cox
the MP tragically killed in an act of
hatred famously said we have far more in
common than that which divides us let’s
find out what we have in common
reach out make friends let’s seek to
really understand that which divides us
but let’s go further than that let’s
recognize it’s not our differences that
divide us differences make our lives
richer and our whole society stronger
understanding empathy freedom all our
children have demands wants and needs
some voice them loudly some voice them
quietly some don’t voice them at all
let’s not feel we are giving way to them
let’s not just tolerate them let’s make
it easy for them some of it’s within my
power some of its within yours and all of its within hours thank you
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