this never changed I always wanted to be
a Disney princess but here’s the deal
I’m 5 foot 13 inches
I was not anyone’s first choice to be
Cinderella or Sleeping Beauty so I did
the only reasonable thing a woman of my
size could do on her quest for the crown
I signed up for a beauty pageant now
this was a mrs. pageant which means that
the majority of contestants were about
age 30 and above prepping for the
contest which included a
question-and-answer section which allows
the contestants to tell the judges about
themselves my pageant mentor asked me
what do you think is the hardest part
for contestants hmm I thought is that
wearing that heavy ballgown no she said
hmm
it’s strutting the catwalk in high heels
and not falling down no she said I got
it’s the swimsuit competition no she
said exasperated its questions and
answers the contestants struggle to tell
their story if see many of the
contestants can tell the judges about
their spouse their children their
children’s hobbies wishes desires and
dreams but when it comes time for the
question tell us about you that’s when
many draw a blank
the day of the pageant arrived and
pretty soon it was my turn for questions
and answers
I felt really confident I got this I
thought I’m ready for this
but when I walked into the room and
locked eyes with the judges some radical
Mindwarp happened
I wasn’t natural and conversational I
was on autopilot I was a robot
attempting to give the judges the kind
of responses I thought they want to hear
versus the honest answers hidden deep
inside
me I was at a loss for my own story I
shared what was on the surface things
like my current mood I’m feeling great
and my thoughts how the pageant was
going oh it’s going wonderfully I’m
having a great time super great
I didn’t dig deep that day I didn’t walk
away with a title and a trophy opted
away with something else BEC death the
mrs. pageant was a breakthrough moment
for me
you see personal stories are critical to
the human connection because they allow
us to understand each other more fully
by sharing our personal story that is
telling people who we really are we’re
able to build relationships make
connections storytelling can even help
you leave a legacy in fact research
shows that storytelling activates
certain parts of the brain that allow a
listener to transform that story into
their own ideas and experiences a
surefire way to get someone’s support
but that begs the question what makes a
great story that question gets a lot of
buzz in the business world it seems like
everyone today is trying to crack the
code the chatter consists of things like
we have to be better storytellers find
the untold stories share the untold
stories be bold be unique to which I say
no no
the difference here is a matter of
thought it’s rational versus emotional
you see people don’t want to be told
what to think and do they want to be
engaged to think feel and do and based
on my observations storytelling can help
with that but it has to be told the
right way it has to be
emotionally honest in addition to being
a beauty pageant contestant I’m also a
former television news reporter
ironically during my time in TV news I
learned a lot about the beauty of
storytelling you see stories don’t need
to be dramatic to be successful you
don’t need to be a famous rock star
actress or entrepreneur to get people’s
attention you need to be honest you need
to be real these qualities spark
engagement on slow news days when the
police scanner was silent and there were
no special events happening in the city
I donned my reporter cap and went out
and did something that’s becoming
increasingly rare in a world filled with
technology Facebook and snapchat I went
out and I talked to people right now
most times when you ask someone how
they’re doing the response is fine or
I’m good it’s something I call dry toast
and just like the beauty pageant a lot
of times when you ask someone to tell
you about themselves they’re not sure
where to begin or what to say but if you
ask the right questions and listen
that’s when the magic happens no more
dry toast just bread and butter so what
my best stories profiled people living
their daily life Ashley the woman who
knit scarves for cancer patients Eugene
the homeless man who lived under the
highway Daniel the 11 year old piano
prodigy who learned the craft from his
father Steve all of these people are
fascinating they come from different
walks of life and share different
perspectives and yet there’s something
about all of their stories that we can
relate to because we’re human
you might not think you have a story to
tell but newsflash you do and it’s that
story that personal experience living
inside of you that someone else needs to
hear the other day I was at the grocery
store 2 o’clock Saturday afternoon but a
time I got to check out the line was so
long it stretched past the candy and gum
racks past the national Enquirer’s and
ended at the last chance DVD bin now me
being 5 foot 13 that’s 6 foot 1 by the
way 5:13 I’m able to look over people’s
heads and I caught sight of the cashier
I could tell she was tired but she was
doing her very best to deliver a
positive guest experience to everyone
she interacted with by the time I got to
the front of the line I caught sight of
her nametag Cassidy and I asked her
Cassidy how are you doing today she
looked at me and said fine that’s when I
looked at the line of shopping carts
behind me really she laughed and said
well to tell you the truth I’m counting
down the minutes to like it out of here
you see I’m a freshman in college and
I’m studying to be an accountant and I
want to get home and finish my school
work well we got to talking a little bit
more and I could tell Cassidy was really
good with numbers
especially after witnessing her price
check on my half pound of strawberries
ok gummi bears before moving down to
school to go to college
Cassidy worked at a donut shop in
downtown Chicago and every day at 8 a.m.
a woman would come in and order the same
thing a medium coffee with cream never a
donut never a bagel but just a medium
coffee with cream and it was like
clockwork clock hits 8 a.m. in walks the
woman each day medium coffee with cream
well the days go by and finally the end
of summer rolls around clock strikes
eight a.m. in walks the woman medium
coffee with cream
cassadee hands her the beverage and says
it’s been a pleasure serving you but
today is my last day and the woman said
oh no I’m so sorry to hear this I’ve
always enjoyed being helped by you where
are you going
Cassidy said well I’m going to college
I’m going to study to be an accountant
the woman opens her purse and pulls out
a business card she hands it to Cassidy
and says well it just so happens I work
for an accounting firm in downtown
Chicago you study hard in school and
give me a call we’re always looking for
top talent now even in the grocery store
after a long work day you could see the
hope in Cassidy’s eyes you could tell
that this 18 year old was bound and
determined to achieve her dream and by
sharing her story with this woman this
business woman in the don’t chop Cassidy
opened a door for herself she created a
connection
I left the grocery store that day but
this story did not leave me because it
speaks volumes about the storytelling
magic that happens when we listen ask
questions and speak honestly your next
opportunity could be right around the
corner but it’s up to you to think about
your life and the kinds of stories you
want to tell to help with this process
I’d like you to ask yourself a few
questions first what brings me joy next
what was a difficult time in my life and
what did I learn
and finally what do I want my
grandchildren real or hypothetical to
know about me take time to consider
these questions in the quiet moments of
your life knowing your story will help
guide you sharing it can help guide
others when I think about these
questions I know that people bring me
joy I’m always going somewhere doing
something trying something new and it’s
because I find people so intriguing I
love meeting them they bring me joy and
when I think about a difficult time in
my life for me it was figuring out what
to do with it I graduated college in the
time of the recession and who went
through job after job after job
searching for opportunities trying to
find myself going to different theatre
auditions until I finally paved my way
into a communications career and when I
think about all of those struggles now I
know that they built character they made
me stronger all of us have a unique
story to tell but it’s up to us to
persevere to fill the pages of our own
story book and not anyone else’s I think
back to the beauty pageant you know I
wasn’t quite sure how to express my
story at that time but since then I’ve
to pause and reflect and to think about
the kinds of stories I want to be
telling others I want you to do the
thing I want you to have those
breakthrough moments that allow you to
create connections build relationships
or leave a lasting legacy a little girl
was in the bookstore with her mother
when she spotted a book about
agriculture mommy can I get this one
her mother smiled and said agriculture
but I thought you wanted a
about baking instead no I want this one
because it reminds me of grandpa and the
stories he told me about growing up on
the farm
news flash your stories are beautiful
gifts gifts that can last a lifetime
share them generously with others Thanks
a Disney princess but here’s the deal
I’m 5 foot 13 inches
I was not anyone’s first choice to be
Cinderella or Sleeping Beauty so I did
the only reasonable thing a woman of my
size could do on her quest for the crown
I signed up for a beauty pageant now
this was a mrs. pageant which means that
the majority of contestants were about
age 30 and above prepping for the
contest which included a
question-and-answer section which allows
the contestants to tell the judges about
themselves my pageant mentor asked me
what do you think is the hardest part
for contestants hmm I thought is that
wearing that heavy ballgown no she said
hmm
it’s strutting the catwalk in high heels
and not falling down no she said I got
it’s the swimsuit competition no she
said exasperated its questions and
answers the contestants struggle to tell
their story if see many of the
contestants can tell the judges about
their spouse their children their
children’s hobbies wishes desires and
dreams but when it comes time for the
question tell us about you that’s when
many draw a blank
the day of the pageant arrived and
pretty soon it was my turn for questions
and answers
I felt really confident I got this I
thought I’m ready for this
but when I walked into the room and
locked eyes with the judges some radical
Mindwarp happened
I wasn’t natural and conversational I
was on autopilot I was a robot
attempting to give the judges the kind
of responses I thought they want to hear
versus the honest answers hidden deep
inside
me I was at a loss for my own story I
shared what was on the surface things
like my current mood I’m feeling great
and my thoughts how the pageant was
going oh it’s going wonderfully I’m
having a great time super great
I didn’t dig deep that day I didn’t walk
away with a title and a trophy opted
away with something else BEC death the
mrs. pageant was a breakthrough moment
for me
you see personal stories are critical to
the human connection because they allow
us to understand each other more fully
by sharing our personal story that is
telling people who we really are we’re
able to build relationships make
connections storytelling can even help
you leave a legacy in fact research
shows that storytelling activates
certain parts of the brain that allow a
listener to transform that story into
their own ideas and experiences a
surefire way to get someone’s support
but that begs the question what makes a
great story that question gets a lot of
buzz in the business world it seems like
everyone today is trying to crack the
code the chatter consists of things like
we have to be better storytellers find
the untold stories share the untold
stories be bold be unique to which I say
no no
the difference here is a matter of
thought it’s rational versus emotional
you see people don’t want to be told
what to think and do they want to be
engaged to think feel and do and based
on my observations storytelling can help
with that but it has to be told the
right way it has to be
emotionally honest in addition to being
a beauty pageant contestant I’m also a
former television news reporter
ironically during my time in TV news I
learned a lot about the beauty of
storytelling you see stories don’t need
to be dramatic to be successful you
don’t need to be a famous rock star
actress or entrepreneur to get people’s
attention you need to be honest you need
to be real these qualities spark
engagement on slow news days when the
police scanner was silent and there were
no special events happening in the city
I donned my reporter cap and went out
and did something that’s becoming
increasingly rare in a world filled with
technology Facebook and snapchat I went
out and I talked to people right now
most times when you ask someone how
they’re doing the response is fine or
I’m good it’s something I call dry toast
and just like the beauty pageant a lot
of times when you ask someone to tell
you about themselves they’re not sure
where to begin or what to say but if you
ask the right questions and listen
that’s when the magic happens no more
dry toast just bread and butter so what
my best stories profiled people living
their daily life Ashley the woman who
knit scarves for cancer patients Eugene
the homeless man who lived under the
highway Daniel the 11 year old piano
prodigy who learned the craft from his
father Steve all of these people are
fascinating they come from different
walks of life and share different
perspectives and yet there’s something
about all of their stories that we can
relate to because we’re human
you might not think you have a story to
tell but newsflash you do and it’s that
story that personal experience living
inside of you that someone else needs to
hear the other day I was at the grocery
store 2 o’clock Saturday afternoon but a
time I got to check out the line was so
long it stretched past the candy and gum
racks past the national Enquirer’s and
ended at the last chance DVD bin now me
being 5 foot 13 that’s 6 foot 1 by the
way 5:13 I’m able to look over people’s
heads and I caught sight of the cashier
I could tell she was tired but she was
doing her very best to deliver a
positive guest experience to everyone
she interacted with by the time I got to
the front of the line I caught sight of
her nametag Cassidy and I asked her
Cassidy how are you doing today she
looked at me and said fine that’s when I
looked at the line of shopping carts
behind me really she laughed and said
well to tell you the truth I’m counting
down the minutes to like it out of here
you see I’m a freshman in college and
I’m studying to be an accountant and I
want to get home and finish my school
work well we got to talking a little bit
more and I could tell Cassidy was really
good with numbers
especially after witnessing her price
check on my half pound of strawberries
ok gummi bears before moving down to
school to go to college
Cassidy worked at a donut shop in
downtown Chicago and every day at 8 a.m.
a woman would come in and order the same
thing a medium coffee with cream never a
donut never a bagel but just a medium
coffee with cream and it was like
clockwork clock hits 8 a.m. in walks the
woman each day medium coffee with cream
well the days go by and finally the end
of summer rolls around clock strikes
eight a.m. in walks the woman medium
coffee with cream
cassadee hands her the beverage and says
it’s been a pleasure serving you but
today is my last day and the woman said
oh no I’m so sorry to hear this I’ve
always enjoyed being helped by you where
are you going
Cassidy said well I’m going to college
I’m going to study to be an accountant
the woman opens her purse and pulls out
a business card she hands it to Cassidy
and says well it just so happens I work
for an accounting firm in downtown
Chicago you study hard in school and
give me a call we’re always looking for
top talent now even in the grocery store
after a long work day you could see the
hope in Cassidy’s eyes you could tell
that this 18 year old was bound and
determined to achieve her dream and by
sharing her story with this woman this
business woman in the don’t chop Cassidy
opened a door for herself she created a
connection
I left the grocery store that day but
this story did not leave me because it
speaks volumes about the storytelling
magic that happens when we listen ask
questions and speak honestly your next
opportunity could be right around the
corner but it’s up to you to think about
your life and the kinds of stories you
want to tell to help with this process
I’d like you to ask yourself a few
questions first what brings me joy next
what was a difficult time in my life and
what did I learn
and finally what do I want my
grandchildren real or hypothetical to
know about me take time to consider
these questions in the quiet moments of
your life knowing your story will help
guide you sharing it can help guide
others when I think about these
questions I know that people bring me
joy I’m always going somewhere doing
something trying something new and it’s
because I find people so intriguing I
love meeting them they bring me joy and
when I think about a difficult time in
my life for me it was figuring out what
to do with it I graduated college in the
time of the recession and who went
through job after job after job
searching for opportunities trying to
find myself going to different theatre
auditions until I finally paved my way
into a communications career and when I
think about all of those struggles now I
know that they built character they made
me stronger all of us have a unique
story to tell but it’s up to us to
persevere to fill the pages of our own
story book and not anyone else’s I think
back to the beauty pageant you know I
wasn’t quite sure how to express my
story at that time but since then I’ve
to pause and reflect and to think about
the kinds of stories I want to be
telling others I want you to do the
thing I want you to have those
breakthrough moments that allow you to
create connections build relationships
or leave a lasting legacy a little girl
was in the bookstore with her mother
when she spotted a book about
agriculture mommy can I get this one
her mother smiled and said agriculture
but I thought you wanted a
about baking instead no I want this one
because it reminds me of grandpa and the
stories he told me about growing up on
the farm
news flash your stories are beautiful
gifts gifts that can last a lifetime
share them generously with others Thanks
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