November day and by
the fall there’s nothing I wanted to do
more than to roll over and go back to
that but I have made a commitment to
meet up with a friend the decision to
get up and honor my commitment will
greatly alter my success if I didn’t get
up that morning I would miss a wonderful
opportunity so let me ask all of you
what would you have done in that
situation I’d like to talk to you today
about networking your way to a
successful legacy with the current 100th
anniversary happening here at Bentley
I’ve spent more time thinking about my
legacy than ever before in the four
years that I was here as a student I
never once thought about what I wanted
my legacy to be like on campus or with
my peers at work or of my family and
friends who knew that 25 years later I’d
be an executive in the private jet
business working with celebrities and
professional athletes like this big guy
up above well the things that come to my
mind when I think about legacy and what
it really means are the following
what would you came down from the past
isn’t it inheritance if so is it an
ethical one a financial one or maybe a
moral one or all the above will you
strive for extraordinary performance and
everything that you do whether as a
friend roommate a teacher a coach or
maybe a parent have you thought about
what you want your reputation to be like
five 10 15 years from now and most
importantly can you realize your
failures and how you will learn from
them are you able to change and still
succeed I’m gonna switch gears for a few
minutes but I’ll come back to legacy a
little bit later now I’d like to discuss
networking and what exactly I think it
should mean to you networking to me is
an art it’s an art that takes time
energy and effort I like to think of it
as an art of making deposits taking
withdrawals and then reaping the
dividends by making deposits today
you’ll learn the right to ask for that
favor or withdraw trust me it’ll come so
much easier if you do it this way it
took me years to develop this skill set
little did I know that at a very early
age I started to learn about it growing
up in upstate New York I was a avid
youth hockey player my father an avid
hockey fan my coach for most of my youth
and some of my favorite memories were
thinking about the times my family and I
spend driving around the Northeast and
Canada for youth hockey games from six
to fourteen years old all winter long
we’d be on the road and usually after
our games we’d end up at some random
diner in my town in New York and
happened to be friendlies we’d be there
with all the other parents and the
players would go sit at one end of the
table and the restaurant and the parents
would try to get as far away from us and
sit at the end of other end of the
restaurant at another table but I’d
often listen to my father discuss
business and politics and most often why
we either won or lost that last game but
even at an early age I remember my
father always listening and asking
questions and then listening before
offering his opinion for the record this
all changed when he hit his golden years
sorry sorry dad but the relationships my
dad built back then turned out to be
lifelong friends and they turned out to
be friends that eventually would help my
sister and I get jobs today my family
and I and my sister were so proud of the
fact that my father made years of
deposits so that his children and
grandchildren could reap dividends so
let me ask all of you have you been
making deposits or have they all been
attempts at withdrawals okay so what
does this really mean
well 25 years ago I came to Bentley
played some hockey and lacrosse I joined
a fraternity and to my surprise I was
asked to represent my class at
graduation and be the baccalaureate
speaker trust me after attending a
military school for four years and
coming to college I really enjoyed my
experience here and looking back now I
didn’t realize how structured my life
was back then March in this parade wear
this uniform shine these shoes play
these sports and by all means never
break the honor code well when I
departed military school for college it
was the first time in my life that I was
able to start making deposits and not
having to always fall in line networking
those first few years was really social
networking and I don’t mean Facebook I
didn’t realize that the relationships
that I had
my roommates and my coaches my teachers
would ultimately help shape my
successful legacy your legacy isn’t part
of a strict curriculum that somebody
else controls it’s something that you
determined by the choices you make and
the actions that you take
everyone to take a quick second here and
look to your left and to your right and
if the person next to you is your
roommate or a teammate can you honestly
say that you’ve spent the time to get to
know them
have you asked questions about maybe
what their mother or father does for a
living have you ever met your professors
outside of your classes and learned
about their successful paths and how
they got here have you ever asked them
if there’s anything you can do to help
contribute in a class again this common
theme of deposits first during my time
here at Bentley I always felt I was a
great friend and a good roommate one of
my roommates Nick he’s the sheriff up
there and sure he’s gonna be watching
this at some point let’s just say he
often found himself in sticky situations
and while helping him get out of some of
those sticky situations we’ve had a lot
of great conversations he always talked
about his mother and his father he was
always so proud of the success that his
father had at his investment firm in New
Jersey
well after graduation I decided to go
down and visit Nick and his father and
they rolled out the red carpet for me I
felt like I was in a really good
position to ask for an interview I’m not
sure that that Nick would have done
anything to help me get that interview
well even though this wasn’t the path
that I chose I can say that honestly
that the years that followed I often
went down to visit Nick and his dad all
right so what I want to talk about next
is how everything today is about
streaming your life online everything’s
out there for the world to see
please note that the secrets that Nick
and I share they can’t be replicated on
Facebook or Instagram they came from
those real face-to-face meetings today
next one of my clients he’s helped me
mentor some students here at Bentley he
always makes an extra effort to come
visit me when he’s up here in Boston
he’s referred people to me and most
importantly he has mastered the art of
networking himself so let me be clear
I’m not saying that you should be the
friend that’s picking up the tab every
Thursday night all I’m saying is
consider working on your networking
skills now making the extra effort today
and giving the extra effort after
college can prove to be the most
fruitful times for laying the foundation
for your legacy whether in business or
in life taking a general interest in
building and maintaining relationships
will make you successful in many
different ways
who knows maybe you’ll find a job your
next deal or even a spouse so you may
feel like you’re maintaining some of
your relationships simply because you’re
liking someone’s picture
however trust me they’ll never be as
deep as the ones you could be building
by picking up the phone or going on a
face-to-face visit twelve years ago
I reconnected with a Bentley friend
while dropping my daughter off at
preschool Joe was two years ago admitted
in an opposing fraternity a great
athlete and clearly the most popular guy
in campus I knew right away that I
wanted to reconnect with Joe and weeks
later we found ourselves in the car
driving to a Celtics game maybe it was
Joe’s front-row seats for the Celtics or
my personal interest and having him as a
new client but regardless I wanted to
cultivate this relationship I’m always
intrigued to hear people’s success
stories and Joe’s was no different he
was a master networker himself and Joe
had expanded as his family’s car empire
up into Massachusetts all while working
on a technology company and still
devoting many hours back here to Bentley
and like usual I asked Joe how can I
help where can I get involved right
Joe sponsored me back here at Bentley at
the Bentley Executive Club which
actually led me to reconnect with one of
my favorite professors from
undergraduate and graduate school you
can see him up there that’s that’s Joe
in the blue and what do you already
heard speak today and the handsome guy
and the snazzy sweater vest is my very
dear friend Perry Lowe Perry was
attending one of those Bentley executive
club meetings and when we ran into each
other I was so excited to see him not
only was I shocked to see him but he
immediately remembered me and he started
to ask me questions about my life when I
told him what I did in the private jet
as this he suggested that I come back to
Bentley and be a corporate sponsor in
his upcoming corporate immersion class
this quickly turned into me becoming a
routine guest lecturer on campus and
then an adjunct professor most recently
an executive in residence for the school
I mentioned this story because I think
it clearly shows you the power of
networking and how it’s shaping my
legacy one of the things that I enjoy
most is giving back last year I heard
Bentley was looking for some faculty
advisors for some of the athletic teams
well being only a part-time lecturer I
wasn’t even sure if I could apply and of
course my initial thoughts were I would
work with men’s lacrosse or men’s hockey
team well fortunately for me I was
assigned to the women’s field hockey
team and outside of my oldest daughter
playing some high school field hockey I
really didn’t know much about the sport
I did know that I was excited to offer
my help in any way possible
so I reached out to the coach and I
kindly invited myself to their next team
meeting and when I was there Jessica the
coach gave me the floor and to be honest
I’m not really sure what the players
thought of me out for my time to help
review resumes discuss corporate America
or maybe answer any questions they
generally had surprisingly fewer the
players reached out to me than I
anticipated
well months passed and with the
offseason upon us and winter approaching
I thought I would try one more time and
this time I called the coach and offered
an internship working for me in my
morgen a sophomore here on campus on
campus and coincidentally from my
hometown had immediately reached out to
me and what impressed me the most was
that she asked to meet with me in order
to get to know me a little bit better
this was very proactive on her part very
refreshing
for me to see in just a few months of
working together I’ve seen Morgan’s
confidence grow
she should be applauded for making the
extra effort routinely pushing herself
out of side of her own comfort zone
she’d learned many new skills and it’s
really nice to bring her on sales calls
and see her shine and contribute I know
that Morgan and I are gonna have a very
long and prosperous relationship and who
knows maybe Morgan will start making
deposits she could even end up mentoring
one of my three daughters someday look I
can tell many stories about success from
networking but let’s get back to that
cold rainy November morning through a
series of networking meetings I was
asked to play golf with a friend that I
didn’t really know all that well truth
be told I really didn’t want to get out
of bed that morning and I was one text
message and a good excuse away from not
showing up we all know it can be
difficult at times to make the extra
effort and I was no exception well when
I arrived at the course my friend was
there standing next to his neighbor they
looked about as excited as I did to go
out and play golf in the rain and when
we got out there I did what I’d normally
do which is I really didn’t discuss
business and just spent the time asking
questions and listening and waiting till
after the round well sure enough weeks
later and my friend’s neighbor reached
out to me and there’s one of the most
successful private equity guys in Boston
he asked me if I could help fly the CEO
of one of his companies that company
turned out to be my largest client and
they still fly with me today what
message would I have sent to my family
and my legacy if I didn’t show up to
that round of golf
always always honor your commitments can
you imagine if I didn’t get up that day
and I took the easy way out and came up
with some excuse saying I couldn’t be
all right finally let’s get back to your
legacy I want you to ask yourself do you
know what people think of you
have you made any differences in your
life
what morals and values and ideals can
you pass down to the next generation
have you had any specific interactions
that you’ve created that are gonna leave
a lasting impact for the students in the
room now it’s your time reach out to
your professors reach out to your
friends your teammates ask if you can
get involved and how you can help out
for everybody else here listening and
those watching online it’s never too
late to start networking remember by
making deposits today before asking for
withdrawals tomorrow will lead to pay
dividends in your future thank you
everyone have a good [Applause]