pet peeves pet peeves are those little
annoyances that we have in life that
often consume far too much of our
psychic energy there they irritate us
far too much and what I want to do today
is share some of my pet peeves with you
but I think I’m going to find that you
have similar peeves yourself so let’s
get started all right this is not a pet
peeve of mine the dogs got to do what a
dog’s got to do I have it on myself
my pet peeve is with the dog’s owner
because the dog’s owners going to come
up with his or her leash leash the dog
and walk home leaving the little doggie
deposit behind now what’s going to
happen is I or someone else will come
along and step in the little doggie
deposit very irritating and what’s even
more irritating is that you know at that
owners house in some closet or some
drawer is a room for you as all these
plastic bags I mean there’s a great way
to recycle plastic pick up your dog poop
speaking of poop we have here we have
here we have here the under and over
conundrum and this is a little bit of
audience participation right now so with
your applause since I can’t really see
hands how many of you here think that it
doesn’t matter which way you put the
toilet paper on the roll
let me hear any applause
[Applause]
my wife is not here you are probably the
same people here now how many of you are
think that the role on the left the
under is the way it should go on
[Music]
[Applause]
how many of you think that it should be
the one on the right
[Applause]
I am vindicated I’m vindicated I can’t
make a go home and tell my wife she’s
with the first group she doesn’t think
it matters so if she happens to put her
on that way I actually you know we have
two bathrooms and if she puts them on I
go back and I put them the other way
that’s my problem
not one thing my wife and I both share
is that when we use a stall in a public
facility a public toilet and when it’s
far too late you find this okay how many
have you been in that situation okay
it’s irritating irritating okay moving
on to a different subject let’s get out
of the toilet all right for all of you
drivers or would-be drivers this is
probably one of my biggest irritants pet
peeves on the road and it’s when someone
in the left lane
is not doing what this sign tells them
it’s another person the right lane is
doing anything wrong as a person left
wing they’re not passing they’re just
about tandem with the car they’re
passing and of course what’s happening
behind that car is that you get two cars
and then three cars and then four cars
and five cars and what is everybody
doing to the person in front of them
blinking their lights all right this is
if this causes accidents so obey the
rules of the road a corollary of this
especially since I like to walk off
escalators and not just ride them is
this people taking up both side people
taking up both sides of the escalator
okay or if it’s not another person they
have their suitcase on the side you
can’t get past them back to Otto’s back
to Otto’s there we go okay
I can’t tell you how irritating this is
I’m not sure where this photo comes from
but having lived in California where
there seemed to be a Hummer you know all
I think it’s in California also there
are some trees in the parking lot that’s
probably California okay this is this is
so egregious first of all this guy and
you know it’s a guy is is driving a
Hummer the biggest gas guzzler around
they should be banned all right but he’s
too lazy cuz you know 90 feet over there
is a spot for him to park but he’s too
lazy to walk the extra 90 feet so he he
goes around and he goes in the compact
lot and takes up two spots okay I can’t
tell you what I would like to do to the
Hummer it would be illegal I wouldn’t do
it but I would think about it all right
yeah one of my favorites I really like
watching people chewing their gum with
their mouths wide open and snapping it
at the same time the sound is you know
it just goes with the mouth so all of
you all of you who do this I want you to
know that when you do that this is what
people see
so keep your mouths closed
[Music]
now as a teacher I’m I really care about
grammar I care about punctuation I think
it’s important to write well
unfortunately increasingly today
especially on commercial signs I’m
seeing more and more of this the
inappropriate use of the apostrophe they
can’t tell the difference between
apostrophe s and the plural s this looks
like it’s a blackboard I almost would
want to go up and you’re like erase the
thing and you know put the sign
connecting of something now how many of
you who also this is this site is great
I mean it bothers me with the
apostrophes there’s something else on
this sign it’s really irritating to me
can anybody see it
are the hearts and it’s a dot that goes
over the I save the hearts for
Valentine’s Day don’t do that don’t do
that we’re getting to the end okay I
have nothing against Christmas
decorations don’t wait wait it’s a
wonderful pagan tradition okay
and I have nothing that’s fine people
want to decorate their houses spend all
that money on electricity go for it
which is beginning to bother me though
about a lot of this is that when I was a
kid I think we put up a couple of lights
in front of our house and we did that
about the weekend before Christmas and
at the Epiphany you know January 6 7 we
took them down people today the day
after Halloween they’re putting this
stuff up and you know that they have
four songs four or five songs Christmas
kept looping going on
now you’ve seen it right now so they get
started the day after Halloween and they
don’t take them down till Groundhog’s
Day the song is 12 days of Christmas not
90 days of Christmas and with that I
thank you and I hope that one of your
pet peeves is not having to listen to an
old man who kids are complaining all the
time thank you very much
[Applause]
annoyances that we have in life that
often consume far too much of our
psychic energy there they irritate us
far too much and what I want to do today
is share some of my pet peeves with you
but I think I’m going to find that you
have similar peeves yourself so let’s
get started all right this is not a pet
peeve of mine the dogs got to do what a
dog’s got to do I have it on myself
my pet peeve is with the dog’s owner
because the dog’s owners going to come
up with his or her leash leash the dog
and walk home leaving the little doggie
deposit behind now what’s going to
happen is I or someone else will come
along and step in the little doggie
deposit very irritating and what’s even
more irritating is that you know at that
owners house in some closet or some
drawer is a room for you as all these
plastic bags I mean there’s a great way
to recycle plastic pick up your dog poop
speaking of poop we have here we have
here we have here the under and over
conundrum and this is a little bit of
audience participation right now so with
your applause since I can’t really see
hands how many of you here think that it
doesn’t matter which way you put the
toilet paper on the roll
let me hear any applause
[Applause]
my wife is not here you are probably the
same people here now how many of you are
think that the role on the left the
under is the way it should go on
[Music]
[Applause]
how many of you think that it should be
the one on the right
[Applause]
I am vindicated I’m vindicated I can’t
make a go home and tell my wife she’s
with the first group she doesn’t think
it matters so if she happens to put her
on that way I actually you know we have
two bathrooms and if she puts them on I
go back and I put them the other way
that’s my problem
not one thing my wife and I both share
is that when we use a stall in a public
facility a public toilet and when it’s
far too late you find this okay how many
have you been in that situation okay
it’s irritating irritating okay moving
on to a different subject let’s get out
of the toilet all right for all of you
drivers or would-be drivers this is
probably one of my biggest irritants pet
peeves on the road and it’s when someone
in the left lane
is not doing what this sign tells them
it’s another person the right lane is
doing anything wrong as a person left
wing they’re not passing they’re just
about tandem with the car they’re
passing and of course what’s happening
behind that car is that you get two cars
and then three cars and then four cars
and five cars and what is everybody
doing to the person in front of them
blinking their lights all right this is
if this causes accidents so obey the
rules of the road a corollary of this
especially since I like to walk off
escalators and not just ride them is
this people taking up both side people
taking up both sides of the escalator
okay or if it’s not another person they
have their suitcase on the side you
can’t get past them back to Otto’s back
to Otto’s there we go okay
I can’t tell you how irritating this is
I’m not sure where this photo comes from
but having lived in California where
there seemed to be a Hummer you know all
I think it’s in California also there
are some trees in the parking lot that’s
probably California okay this is this is
so egregious first of all this guy and
you know it’s a guy is is driving a
Hummer the biggest gas guzzler around
they should be banned all right but he’s
too lazy cuz you know 90 feet over there
is a spot for him to park but he’s too
lazy to walk the extra 90 feet so he he
goes around and he goes in the compact
lot and takes up two spots okay I can’t
tell you what I would like to do to the
Hummer it would be illegal I wouldn’t do
it but I would think about it all right
yeah one of my favorites I really like
watching people chewing their gum with
their mouths wide open and snapping it
at the same time the sound is you know
it just goes with the mouth so all of
you all of you who do this I want you to
know that when you do that this is what
people see
so keep your mouths closed
[Music]
now as a teacher I’m I really care about
grammar I care about punctuation I think
it’s important to write well
unfortunately increasingly today
especially on commercial signs I’m
seeing more and more of this the
inappropriate use of the apostrophe they
can’t tell the difference between
apostrophe s and the plural s this looks
like it’s a blackboard I almost would
want to go up and you’re like erase the
thing and you know put the sign
connecting of something now how many of
you who also this is this site is great
I mean it bothers me with the
apostrophes there’s something else on
this sign it’s really irritating to me
can anybody see it
are the hearts and it’s a dot that goes
over the I save the hearts for
Valentine’s Day don’t do that don’t do
that we’re getting to the end okay I
have nothing against Christmas
decorations don’t wait wait it’s a
wonderful pagan tradition okay
and I have nothing that’s fine people
want to decorate their houses spend all
that money on electricity go for it
which is beginning to bother me though
about a lot of this is that when I was a
kid I think we put up a couple of lights
in front of our house and we did that
about the weekend before Christmas and
at the Epiphany you know January 6 7 we
took them down people today the day
after Halloween they’re putting this
stuff up and you know that they have
four songs four or five songs Christmas
kept looping going on
now you’ve seen it right now so they get
started the day after Halloween and they
don’t take them down till Groundhog’s
Day the song is 12 days of Christmas not
90 days of Christmas and with that I
thank you and I hope that one of your
pet peeves is not having to listen to an
old man who kids are complaining all the
time thank you very much
[Applause]
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