a couple years ago a really strange
thing happened a buddy of mine named Nev
made a documentary about his online
relationship and it became a hit and
then they decided to spin it into a TV
series and they needed some help
shooting the pilot the first episode and
so they called me I was a filmmaker I
had made a number of short films and
documentaries and commercials I had a
skill set and I was a friend
I also was needing money at the time and
I didn’t have much to do so I said sure
why not and you know if living in
Hollywood for about ten years at that
point had taught me anything it’s that
pilots rarely if ever turn into anything
more than just a fun couple days of
shooting so the next thing you know the
pilot gets picked up and the next thing
you know I’m not just behind the camera
I’m in front of it and then the next
thing you know this is MTV’s next big
reality show after the Jersey Shore or
Geordie Shore as I’m sure you guys know
and I am right there on the poster off
to the side I am a reality TV show
sidekick
all of a sudden which let me tell you is
not something I ever thought I would end
up being I don’t even know if reality TV
show sidekick is something you would put
on your resume how would you even
explain that but it happened and now
here I am a minor celebrity and this is
what my talk is gonna be about
so let’s qualify this term minor
celebrity for a second it’s somewhere
above a game show contestant but beneath
a locally elected public official
so Andy Burnham up here
I’m down here but you know you guys are
wondering what is it like to be a minor
celebrity it’s not quite what’s not
probably what you think it’s like I’m
not a big big celebrity I’m not like
famous famous but you know my fame
shares some characteristics with big
fame for example people recognize me but
they don’t know who I am
a common scenario is that I’m walking
down the street and someone will stop me
and say hey have we met before I think I
know you from somewhere and they do know
me from somewhere but as they stand
there and they’re they’re trying to
figure it out I you know I’m holding
back I tell them where I think they know
me from but that would be presumptuous
and I don’t want to come across as a
dick so I just stand there and wait I
can’t tell you how many people think
that they went to college with me
they didn’t another common scenario is
that out of the corner of my eye
I’ll have this sense you get a sixth
sense about these things
I’ll see someone notice me and that
they’re not so sure though so they
quickly dive into their phone and I
don’t know they’re googling something
you know gray hair thirties forties you
know and then something even stranger
happens they then come up to me and they
go oh my god I thought it was you you
know I saw this gray haired guy he was
picking his nose and I had this feeling
and I looked it up and it’s you people
telling you the discovery story is
something that is very specific to minor
celebrity
you are so hard to figure out you’re so
hard to place that when people actually
finally do it there’s a sense of
accomplishment
and they feel the need to share with you
and to brag to you that they were able
to pull off the challenge of figuring
out who you were and I’m telling you
this is a thing this is everyone does
this it happens every day of course the
people who actually do recognise me know
where I’m from they I always know when
they recognize me because they go hey
it’s catfish or they go hey where’s your
buddy Nev Nev is the other guy on the
show most of the time they just go hey
Nev no one knows my name minor celebrity
another hallmark of kind of just
entering Fame at the at the lowest level
is having a websites and blog posts
speculate that you are secretly gay for
a while if you typed max Joseph into a
Google search window gay question mark
was the first thing that popped up so
that’s when you know you’ve made it so
there are some upsides to being
specifically a minor celebrity you know
one thing that’s just totally unfair
about life is that celebrities get free
all the time you know if you’re
Anthony Hopkins or George Clooney and
you say that you like Lamborghinis
there’s a good chance that a Lamborghini
is going to show up in your driveway the
next day doesn’t quite work that way for
minor celebrities but what I do get on
every third or fourth flight I will get
a free sandwich from a friendly flight
attendant who watches my show I actually
got two on the way over here
I got a chip picking chipotle chicken
wrap and a turkey club they’re better
than they look you know those sandwiches
also another cool thing strangers hug
you
all the time I’m not advocating to go
and hug strangers but and the moral the
story is not just to accept hugs from
random strangers either but in this cold
cruel world that we live in getting hugs
from strangers is actually a nice thing
I’m pretty shy socially and breaking
through that kind of invisible wall that
separates us all is something that’s
always given me a lot of anxiety so the
idea that anywhere I go someone might
come up to me give me a hug and start
talking to me has been a really nice
relief to be honest but like with any
blessing there are a few downsides to
being a minor celebrity one of them is
standing in line for restaurants or
clubs that becomes really awkward and
embarrassing because you are not quite
famous enough for the bouncer or the
door person to recognize you and you’re
certainly not on the VIP list or else
you wouldn’t be on the line but you are
famous famous enough for other people on
the line to snicker and whisper about
you geez why is he waiting on line with
us his career must not be going very
well it’s awkward and I wish I could get
on more of those VIP lists so another
downside to being a minor celebrity is
is this the TMZ celebrity tour bus this
thing trolls all of Hollywood in Los
Angeles it’s like it’s like a celebrity
Safari you know and this is what you do
when you go when you’re a tourist in LA
you get on one of these buses and it
drives around LA hunting for celebrities
but what actual celebrity is actually
walking in LA
you know like George Clooney is is like
a lion in this scenario and and Julia
Roberts is like a giraffe I guess and
I’m like eh
fieldmouse and dare i say they’ve caught
me twice it’s very awkward when it
happens the first time I was on I was on
the phone with my mom having a fight and
all of a sudden I hear oh my god there
was Max from catfish and I turn around
and there’s this bus and it it pulls
over it doesn’t doesn’t just keep going
it pulls over and the guy gets out he’s
got the camcorder and everything this is
more for the benefit of the people on
the bus then than it is for an actual
like lead on a story and he runs up to
me and he’s got the camera in my face
anyway I have to you know hang up with
my mom that was the end of that call
another time the the bus got me I was
walking with the I wrote a movie and
directed it a few years ago and my
co-writer is is a girl she’s about my
age and we were walking together talking
intensely about you know some plot
points in the movie and how we wanted a
scene to get to go and of course the TMZ
tour bus pulls up behind us and all of a
sudden I you know the guy says oh my god
who’s the girl max hope hope it’s your
wife I froze I didn’t know what to do or
say I knew anything I could I did say
could end up somewhere and again I’m
really bad at being a celebrity I don’t
know what to say or how to handle myself
so I just froze and it was a one-way
street so I just started walking the
other way but for the last six years or
so I have lived my life now as a minor
celebrity you know it was 30 when it
happened so I lived for a long time in
anonymity enjoying you know people
watching and nose picking and other
things you do when you know that no
one’s really paying attention but it’s
been a really interesting journey and
I’ve there are a few insights that you
pick up along the way here are my four
kind of biggest takeaways observations
from having lived the last couple years
as a miner
liberté okay the first observation is
that autographs are out and selfies are
in okay when I was a kid all you did was
get autographs now it’s all about the
selfies which is a relief because
autographs are really hard one
you need a pen people I can’t tell you
people come up to me once in a while
people come up to me and ask me for an
autograph and then they pull like a
crumpled-up receipt out of their pocket
and they asked me if I have a pen I
don’t have a pen
also when you do an autograph you need
it kind of you need to spell someone’s
name correctly which is really hard
these days and then you need to kind of
custom write a note to someone knowing
the whole time that the autograph itself
will just end up in the drawer with the
old remote controls anyway so it just
seems like a waste of time in it’s
futile and you know that they just want
a selfie anyway selfies are a lot easier
a lot quicker and a lot more painless
okay
second observation is that it takes a
lot of guts to come up and interrupt a
celebrity of any kind when they’re in
the middle of something so when people
come up to me it’s not uncommon for you
know them to be shaking or for their
heart to be kind of pounding in their
chest I can tell when my arm is around
them and we’re taking the selfie I can
feel their heart pounding or if they’re
holding the phone I have to generally
actually take the phone out of their
hand because it’s shaking too much
which is funny but what you realize is
that they’ve just spent the last X odd
minutes psyching themselves up to come
up to you you know this is something
that I’ve experienced going up to girls
but I certainly you know this is the
first time I’ve seen people psyching
themselves up to come up to me and what
you realize is that when you hug them or
take a selfie with them the thing that
might make their mourn
or afternoon or day about you know
meeting a celebrity is not that they’re
meeting some gray-haired sidekick from a
reality show on MTV it’s that they just
forced themselves out of their comfort
zone to do something scary and it worked
out and I love being part of that
process it’s a total win-win again in
this world of many zero-sum games and a
lot of hate being on the other side of
that fear exposure is a really beautiful
thing which leads me to my third
observation which is that if you say
anything if you ask them a question if
you ask them where they’re going or you
say you like their shirt or you engage
in any conversation of any kind that
magic of celebrity vanishes all of a
sudden they’re like ah who’s this guy
why is he want to be my friend what’s
wrong with them he’s a total stranger
why am i hugging him the veil of
celebrity is very very thin when people
come up to you they want to come up to
you they want to tell you a story they
want to tell you the story of how they
figured out you were you or they want to
tell you a story about how they were in
an online relationship once and it
worked out or it didn’t work out but the
point is that when they come up to you
they want to say something to you they
do not want you to say anything to them
and it took me a while to learn this now
when people come up to me and ask me for
pictures or anything it’s great I I
remain very aloof and I just kind of say
the bare minimum and it works out
because that’s actually what they want
they want the veil to remain they want
to talk to celebrity I don’t want to
talk to someone who actually wants to be
friends with them or to be interested in
them it’s kind of sad but true
in the fourth insight and takeaway and
and this is my favorite part of being a
minor celebrity aside from the free
sandwiches on airplanes
is that I get the best version of people
people show me their best selves and I’m
not trying to brag I I think that most
minor celebrities would tell you this I
don’t major celebrities it’s different
and I’ll explain so what I mean by I get
people’s best selves I’ll give you I’ll
tell you a story it’s not a long story
it’s actually very quick and not very
specific story it’s like 6:00 a.m. I’ve
just gotten into New York I’m flying in
for some reason or another and I go to
get coffee right and the woman working
behind the the barista is not in a good
mood you know she’s just worked two
shifts from her other job she’s
exhausted she’s tired the guy in front
of me is ordering like a venti
peppermint soy latte she’s giving him
some attitude deservedly and then I step
up and normally I would just pick up on
her negative vibes and I was just trying
to I would just try to get in and out as
fast as possible not make much of a
splash but she sees me and she lights up
and she goes Nev
and I go yeah and she goes can I can I
get a picture I’m like sure so she you
know the whole attitude melts away she
comes she takes her apron off because
she doesn’t want that in the selfie she
comes out from around the counter and
she takes out her phone and gives it to
me cuz I I know how to take selfies so I
just take the phone now something you
get good at and then I see you know on
the on her background screen on the
phone it’s a picture of her and her kid
and and we take the picture and and she
goes back around puts her apron on and
she asked me if I want some extra foam I
say sure and then she gives me an extra
pump of that vanilla syrup that I didn’t
ask for I don’t really want it it’s
sweet and caloric but I’ll take it and
and you know her morning is made and my
morning is made and it’s totally
undeserved I didn’t do anything to
deserve that but you know I wouldn’t
have even seen that side of her I
wouldn’t have seen her best self if she
if I wasn’t a minor celebrity if she
hadn’t seen a few episodes of my show
late one night and you know these days
it’s very easy to see everything in two
dimensions to write people off to
project narratives on to people you know
especially on the internet right people
seem like they’re just two-dimensional
they’re just a profile and avatar there
they are they’re one thing you know
everything’s black and white and as
tensions rise we tend to and we’re
tempted to kind of rely on our snap
judgments of people and to see people as
strangers or foreigners or progressives
or conservatives or black or white or
you know Muslim Jewish black and if you
know my stint as a reality TV show
sidekick my detour as a minor celebrity
has taught me any
thing it’s that living by these cynical
judgments my snap judgments of people
are always wrong and totally off-base
and no sooner have I judged someone then
I find myself in their sweet embrace
with both of our days made and everyone
or most everyone I think has a best
version of themselves somewhere inside
of them and certainly being a minor
celebrity for these last few years has
allowed me to see it all over America in
Trump country in non Trump country
around the world I’ve seen the good in
people and I’d like to think that the
invisible wall separating all of our
best selves is just as thin as the veil
of celebrity thank you
you
thing happened a buddy of mine named Nev
made a documentary about his online
relationship and it became a hit and
then they decided to spin it into a TV
series and they needed some help
shooting the pilot the first episode and
so they called me I was a filmmaker I
had made a number of short films and
documentaries and commercials I had a
skill set and I was a friend
I also was needing money at the time and
I didn’t have much to do so I said sure
why not and you know if living in
Hollywood for about ten years at that
point had taught me anything it’s that
pilots rarely if ever turn into anything
more than just a fun couple days of
shooting so the next thing you know the
pilot gets picked up and the next thing
you know I’m not just behind the camera
I’m in front of it and then the next
thing you know this is MTV’s next big
reality show after the Jersey Shore or
Geordie Shore as I’m sure you guys know
and I am right there on the poster off
to the side I am a reality TV show
sidekick
all of a sudden which let me tell you is
not something I ever thought I would end
up being I don’t even know if reality TV
show sidekick is something you would put
on your resume how would you even
explain that but it happened and now
here I am a minor celebrity and this is
what my talk is gonna be about
so let’s qualify this term minor
celebrity for a second it’s somewhere
above a game show contestant but beneath
a locally elected public official
so Andy Burnham up here
I’m down here but you know you guys are
wondering what is it like to be a minor
celebrity it’s not quite what’s not
probably what you think it’s like I’m
not a big big celebrity I’m not like
famous famous but you know my fame
shares some characteristics with big
fame for example people recognize me but
they don’t know who I am
a common scenario is that I’m walking
down the street and someone will stop me
and say hey have we met before I think I
know you from somewhere and they do know
me from somewhere but as they stand
there and they’re they’re trying to
figure it out I you know I’m holding
back I tell them where I think they know
me from but that would be presumptuous
and I don’t want to come across as a
dick so I just stand there and wait I
can’t tell you how many people think
that they went to college with me
they didn’t another common scenario is
that out of the corner of my eye
I’ll have this sense you get a sixth
sense about these things
I’ll see someone notice me and that
they’re not so sure though so they
quickly dive into their phone and I
don’t know they’re googling something
you know gray hair thirties forties you
know and then something even stranger
happens they then come up to me and they
go oh my god I thought it was you you
know I saw this gray haired guy he was
picking his nose and I had this feeling
and I looked it up and it’s you people
telling you the discovery story is
something that is very specific to minor
celebrity
you are so hard to figure out you’re so
hard to place that when people actually
finally do it there’s a sense of
accomplishment
and they feel the need to share with you
and to brag to you that they were able
to pull off the challenge of figuring
out who you were and I’m telling you
this is a thing this is everyone does
this it happens every day of course the
people who actually do recognise me know
where I’m from they I always know when
they recognize me because they go hey
it’s catfish or they go hey where’s your
buddy Nev Nev is the other guy on the
show most of the time they just go hey
Nev no one knows my name minor celebrity
another hallmark of kind of just
entering Fame at the at the lowest level
is having a websites and blog posts
speculate that you are secretly gay for
a while if you typed max Joseph into a
Google search window gay question mark
was the first thing that popped up so
that’s when you know you’ve made it so
there are some upsides to being
specifically a minor celebrity you know
one thing that’s just totally unfair
about life is that celebrities get free
all the time you know if you’re
Anthony Hopkins or George Clooney and
you say that you like Lamborghinis
there’s a good chance that a Lamborghini
is going to show up in your driveway the
next day doesn’t quite work that way for
minor celebrities but what I do get on
every third or fourth flight I will get
a free sandwich from a friendly flight
attendant who watches my show I actually
got two on the way over here
I got a chip picking chipotle chicken
wrap and a turkey club they’re better
than they look you know those sandwiches
also another cool thing strangers hug
you
all the time I’m not advocating to go
and hug strangers but and the moral the
story is not just to accept hugs from
random strangers either but in this cold
cruel world that we live in getting hugs
from strangers is actually a nice thing
I’m pretty shy socially and breaking
through that kind of invisible wall that
separates us all is something that’s
always given me a lot of anxiety so the
idea that anywhere I go someone might
come up to me give me a hug and start
talking to me has been a really nice
relief to be honest but like with any
blessing there are a few downsides to
being a minor celebrity one of them is
standing in line for restaurants or
clubs that becomes really awkward and
embarrassing because you are not quite
famous enough for the bouncer or the
door person to recognize you and you’re
certainly not on the VIP list or else
you wouldn’t be on the line but you are
famous famous enough for other people on
the line to snicker and whisper about
you geez why is he waiting on line with
us his career must not be going very
well it’s awkward and I wish I could get
on more of those VIP lists so another
downside to being a minor celebrity is
is this the TMZ celebrity tour bus this
thing trolls all of Hollywood in Los
Angeles it’s like it’s like a celebrity
Safari you know and this is what you do
when you go when you’re a tourist in LA
you get on one of these buses and it
drives around LA hunting for celebrities
but what actual celebrity is actually
walking in LA
you know like George Clooney is is like
a lion in this scenario and and Julia
Roberts is like a giraffe I guess and
I’m like eh
fieldmouse and dare i say they’ve caught
me twice it’s very awkward when it
happens the first time I was on I was on
the phone with my mom having a fight and
all of a sudden I hear oh my god there
was Max from catfish and I turn around
and there’s this bus and it it pulls
over it doesn’t doesn’t just keep going
it pulls over and the guy gets out he’s
got the camcorder and everything this is
more for the benefit of the people on
the bus then than it is for an actual
like lead on a story and he runs up to
me and he’s got the camera in my face
anyway I have to you know hang up with
my mom that was the end of that call
another time the the bus got me I was
walking with the I wrote a movie and
directed it a few years ago and my
co-writer is is a girl she’s about my
age and we were walking together talking
intensely about you know some plot
points in the movie and how we wanted a
scene to get to go and of course the TMZ
tour bus pulls up behind us and all of a
sudden I you know the guy says oh my god
who’s the girl max hope hope it’s your
wife I froze I didn’t know what to do or
say I knew anything I could I did say
could end up somewhere and again I’m
really bad at being a celebrity I don’t
know what to say or how to handle myself
so I just froze and it was a one-way
street so I just started walking the
other way but for the last six years or
so I have lived my life now as a minor
celebrity you know it was 30 when it
happened so I lived for a long time in
anonymity enjoying you know people
watching and nose picking and other
things you do when you know that no
one’s really paying attention but it’s
been a really interesting journey and
I’ve there are a few insights that you
pick up along the way here are my four
kind of biggest takeaways observations
from having lived the last couple years
as a miner
liberté okay the first observation is
that autographs are out and selfies are
in okay when I was a kid all you did was
get autographs now it’s all about the
selfies which is a relief because
autographs are really hard one
you need a pen people I can’t tell you
people come up to me once in a while
people come up to me and ask me for an
autograph and then they pull like a
crumpled-up receipt out of their pocket
and they asked me if I have a pen I
don’t have a pen
also when you do an autograph you need
it kind of you need to spell someone’s
name correctly which is really hard
these days and then you need to kind of
custom write a note to someone knowing
the whole time that the autograph itself
will just end up in the drawer with the
old remote controls anyway so it just
seems like a waste of time in it’s
futile and you know that they just want
a selfie anyway selfies are a lot easier
a lot quicker and a lot more painless
okay
second observation is that it takes a
lot of guts to come up and interrupt a
celebrity of any kind when they’re in
the middle of something so when people
come up to me it’s not uncommon for you
know them to be shaking or for their
heart to be kind of pounding in their
chest I can tell when my arm is around
them and we’re taking the selfie I can
feel their heart pounding or if they’re
holding the phone I have to generally
actually take the phone out of their
hand because it’s shaking too much
which is funny but what you realize is
that they’ve just spent the last X odd
minutes psyching themselves up to come
up to you you know this is something
that I’ve experienced going up to girls
but I certainly you know this is the
first time I’ve seen people psyching
themselves up to come up to me and what
you realize is that when you hug them or
take a selfie with them the thing that
might make their mourn
or afternoon or day about you know
meeting a celebrity is not that they’re
meeting some gray-haired sidekick from a
reality show on MTV it’s that they just
forced themselves out of their comfort
zone to do something scary and it worked
out and I love being part of that
process it’s a total win-win again in
this world of many zero-sum games and a
lot of hate being on the other side of
that fear exposure is a really beautiful
thing which leads me to my third
observation which is that if you say
anything if you ask them a question if
you ask them where they’re going or you
say you like their shirt or you engage
in any conversation of any kind that
magic of celebrity vanishes all of a
sudden they’re like ah who’s this guy
why is he want to be my friend what’s
wrong with them he’s a total stranger
why am i hugging him the veil of
celebrity is very very thin when people
come up to you they want to come up to
you they want to tell you a story they
want to tell you the story of how they
figured out you were you or they want to
tell you a story about how they were in
an online relationship once and it
worked out or it didn’t work out but the
point is that when they come up to you
they want to say something to you they
do not want you to say anything to them
and it took me a while to learn this now
when people come up to me and ask me for
pictures or anything it’s great I I
remain very aloof and I just kind of say
the bare minimum and it works out
because that’s actually what they want
they want the veil to remain they want
to talk to celebrity I don’t want to
talk to someone who actually wants to be
friends with them or to be interested in
them it’s kind of sad but true
in the fourth insight and takeaway and
and this is my favorite part of being a
minor celebrity aside from the free
sandwiches on airplanes
is that I get the best version of people
people show me their best selves and I’m
not trying to brag I I think that most
minor celebrities would tell you this I
don’t major celebrities it’s different
and I’ll explain so what I mean by I get
people’s best selves I’ll give you I’ll
tell you a story it’s not a long story
it’s actually very quick and not very
specific story it’s like 6:00 a.m. I’ve
just gotten into New York I’m flying in
for some reason or another and I go to
get coffee right and the woman working
behind the the barista is not in a good
mood you know she’s just worked two
shifts from her other job she’s
exhausted she’s tired the guy in front
of me is ordering like a venti
peppermint soy latte she’s giving him
some attitude deservedly and then I step
up and normally I would just pick up on
her negative vibes and I was just trying
to I would just try to get in and out as
fast as possible not make much of a
splash but she sees me and she lights up
and she goes Nev
and I go yeah and she goes can I can I
get a picture I’m like sure so she you
know the whole attitude melts away she
comes she takes her apron off because
she doesn’t want that in the selfie she
comes out from around the counter and
she takes out her phone and gives it to
me cuz I I know how to take selfies so I
just take the phone now something you
get good at and then I see you know on
the on her background screen on the
phone it’s a picture of her and her kid
and and we take the picture and and she
goes back around puts her apron on and
she asked me if I want some extra foam I
say sure and then she gives me an extra
pump of that vanilla syrup that I didn’t
ask for I don’t really want it it’s
sweet and caloric but I’ll take it and
and you know her morning is made and my
morning is made and it’s totally
undeserved I didn’t do anything to
deserve that but you know I wouldn’t
have even seen that side of her I
wouldn’t have seen her best self if she
if I wasn’t a minor celebrity if she
hadn’t seen a few episodes of my show
late one night and you know these days
it’s very easy to see everything in two
dimensions to write people off to
project narratives on to people you know
especially on the internet right people
seem like they’re just two-dimensional
they’re just a profile and avatar there
they are they’re one thing you know
everything’s black and white and as
tensions rise we tend to and we’re
tempted to kind of rely on our snap
judgments of people and to see people as
strangers or foreigners or progressives
or conservatives or black or white or
you know Muslim Jewish black and if you
know my stint as a reality TV show
sidekick my detour as a minor celebrity
has taught me any
thing it’s that living by these cynical
judgments my snap judgments of people
are always wrong and totally off-base
and no sooner have I judged someone then
I find myself in their sweet embrace
with both of our days made and everyone
or most everyone I think has a best
version of themselves somewhere inside
of them and certainly being a minor
celebrity for these last few years has
allowed me to see it all over America in
Trump country in non Trump country
around the world I’ve seen the good in
people and I’d like to think that the
invisible wall separating all of our
best selves is just as thin as the veil
of celebrity thank you
you
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