great I wish to look at the screen and I
wish you to see the list of words and
think out who you visualize on your head
when you see these words we dismiss you
with these words
dude it’s evening this was actually very
important currently there’s a lot of
conversations concerning sexual assault
abuse amongst females and while that is
extremely important it embraces a lot of
awareness
what happens is we somehow kind of
normalize the idea of sexual assault
abuse only happening to females and then
when we do that we subtly and
unintentionally lock out the very
vulnerable population which is nails so
how do we define sexual abuse sexual
abuse is when someone in a position of
power and authority takes advantage of a
person’s trust and respect to involve
them in sexual intent and this is
extremely important to understand
because this previous summer I was in
Nairobi working for an engineer and what
I was doing was I was going through
programs and doing data analysis
concerning sexual assault of each
recording from females and as I was
going through this data what I
consistently
noticed the lack of data or recording
the thumbnails and so I began to ask
myself questions does this mean that
nails just aren’t news or maybe it’s
just not happening
here and surviving interviewer that
imported through local statistics and I
went through and what I saw was an
alarming trend just the complete lack of
data in reporting for males for victims
of sexual assault and abuse so looking
at the world health
well the world report on violence and
health from the Derby a charity they
have statistics and there’s two things
you want to know about that is one the
majority of victims will actually be
female and that parking lots of Dumas
cultural social and cultural ideas
worldwide but – you have to also
understand that for both males and
females the reporting practices are
suited seriously underreported for data
collection
now UNICEF UNICEF said that sexual abuse
and violence against males is a
significant problem and 15 million
females aged 15 to 19 years of age and a
national survey came out and reported
that they have been victims a UNICEF
says they did not have a global estimate
for any males worldwide so our mixer on
CDs DNA under the direction and so what
has it has from a national survey you
have males and females who reported
abuse and so 37 percent of females said
that they were first a victim of sexual
violence or abuse
ages of 18 and 24 let their their data
then 30% said it happened between the
ages of 11 and 17 still and then you
look at 12% of females that it happened
to them when they were aged 10 years or
younger that when you look at the data
for the males
it’s nearly twice so when we look at
this data what are we whatever you’re
asking us where we stay so are we saying
that after the young males become 11 to
17
the apiece just stops or they’re no
longer victims
no what’s happening is they’re coming
out they’re reporting once they are
grown men we’re talking 10 20 30 years
after the abuse is happening and that’s
a problem so we need to ask ourselves
how would we normalized this idea of
sexual abuse potential assault being
only a female issue and why would then
not coming out earlier when it happens
so we have several contributing factors
one of his guarantee of masculinity and
we put this up socially at a very early
age we use phrases like toughen up stop
acting like a girl act like a man
and if you look at how we can interact
with our children take two children on
the playground they both all scripture
right they’re bleeding they both feel
pain but what happens is when the little
girl runs off
we embrace her we talk to her about her
pain we allow her to cry though then the
little boy runs up we brush him off he’s
home to be tough we clear away his tears
and we tell them if you boy go play and
it’s really important to give males the
opportunity to express their emotions
especially when being victimized we
allow our girls to display the
sensitivity but suddenly in this moments
we’ve somehow closed off the
conversation with our males and we told
them it’s no longer masculine to be
emotional or to discuss your pain or
share your vulnerabilities all victims
be feel embarrassed and ashamed but
males feel that shame especially once
they become the victim and then and
again because they feel like mourning
and this kind of goes against all of
that masculine mindset that we’ve
socially already established it is the
idea of not feeling this really
important because it’s perpetrators and
predators who first exploit that idea of
masculinity we teach our children to
blindly follow directions and we tell
them that they cost to listen to those
that are in power and authority and then
we have parents and caregivers trust and
respect that our children will
care for Furby traitors them especially
that many males don’t want to be
associated with being a victim or
weakness or emotional and they prey on
that they may threaten them with how
they’re going to be viewed they talk
about what has happened to their peers
and their loved ones they may even
threaten their social sexual orientation
so it’s the stigma and the idea of
weakness and vulnerability and shame
that’s associated with being a sexual
assault the sexual abuse victim that
furthers keeps these males silent
victims many other perpetrators also
placing themselves and positions at
which they know they’re going to be
engaging with children especially males
all right equip demand position of roles
like teachers coaches religious
affiliates they are family friends they
might be your loved ones they might even
be your own here all right an example is
how they in turn we need interactive
controls everyday coaches and players
smack each other on the bottom will say
good games we take our kids to the
doctor and we let the doctor examine
their naked bodies teens and boys will
wrestle with each other and these are
abnormal behaviors normally in deceptive
haters or perpetrators insider to a
twist that they’ve learned the lies and
what they do is they prey on these
victims and they destroy it and it makes
it hard for the making to differentiate
between what was the acceptable and your
normal behavior or what is now
unacceptable they allow their victims to
gain their trust and they make it
confusing and people is not to make
children or teens afraid or suspicious
or fearful of adults but we have to be
extremely transparent with them and we
can’t send them with blinders on out
into the world so it’s really important
to however I call uncomfortable
conversations and these are comfortable
conversations I’ve been told from
parents and friends come from there to
talk to our children about their bodies
and if some of the common common
conversations are stranger danger or bad
touch good touch and a lot of people
leave out the secret touch or that’s
when the third traitor predator is
telling the child that eating even young
adults to keep conversations and
occurrences secret and that should be a
red flag that if you’re having to keep
something secret
that’s not okay and it’s these
comfortable conversations in which we
need to change the masculine mindset to
not be associating victims with weakness
what we need to tell our nails is that
it takes a lot of strength and courage
and bravery to come out and speak out
when these things have happened and we
need to tell them that when you stand up
to a perpetrator or a predator in your
life you’re not just protecting yourself
but you’re stopping the victim
of others and that is heroic so that the
only person that needs to be associated
with shame in weakness needs to be the
perpetrator or the predator themselves
so how do we do this one we have to
disassociate these victim ideas and we
can’t make it all about female we have
to make it extremely inclusive and we
have to change our vocabulary to make
interfaith that L don’t want to be some
victims that they understand the
strength and character is standing out
and advocating for yourself normalizing
the reporting of sexual abuse to
decrease the stigma reporting has to be
the norm and it’s not just the idea that
we need to report reporting is the first
step to prevention so as long as we can
get female and beyond out into the world
to report these incidents happen we can
eventually stop them from happening or
occurring on other victims and last if
we talk they talk you have to have these
uncomfortable conversations and they
can’t feel uncomfortable anymore those
need to be the new norm and advocating
for your child is giving them the
toolset to go on to the world and
advocate for themselves especially male so that we can no longer have
wish you to see the list of words and
think out who you visualize on your head
when you see these words we dismiss you
with these words
dude it’s evening this was actually very
important currently there’s a lot of
conversations concerning sexual assault
abuse amongst females and while that is
extremely important it embraces a lot of
awareness
what happens is we somehow kind of
normalize the idea of sexual assault
abuse only happening to females and then
when we do that we subtly and
unintentionally lock out the very
vulnerable population which is nails so
how do we define sexual abuse sexual
abuse is when someone in a position of
power and authority takes advantage of a
person’s trust and respect to involve
them in sexual intent and this is
extremely important to understand
because this previous summer I was in
Nairobi working for an engineer and what
I was doing was I was going through
programs and doing data analysis
concerning sexual assault of each
recording from females and as I was
going through this data what I
consistently
noticed the lack of data or recording
the thumbnails and so I began to ask
myself questions does this mean that
nails just aren’t news or maybe it’s
just not happening
here and surviving interviewer that
imported through local statistics and I
went through and what I saw was an
alarming trend just the complete lack of
data in reporting for males for victims
of sexual assault and abuse so looking
at the world health
well the world report on violence and
health from the Derby a charity they
have statistics and there’s two things
you want to know about that is one the
majority of victims will actually be
female and that parking lots of Dumas
cultural social and cultural ideas
worldwide but – you have to also
understand that for both males and
females the reporting practices are
suited seriously underreported for data
collection
now UNICEF UNICEF said that sexual abuse
and violence against males is a
significant problem and 15 million
females aged 15 to 19 years of age and a
national survey came out and reported
that they have been victims a UNICEF
says they did not have a global estimate
for any males worldwide so our mixer on
CDs DNA under the direction and so what
has it has from a national survey you
have males and females who reported
abuse and so 37 percent of females said
that they were first a victim of sexual
violence or abuse
ages of 18 and 24 let their their data
then 30% said it happened between the
ages of 11 and 17 still and then you
look at 12% of females that it happened
to them when they were aged 10 years or
younger that when you look at the data
for the males
it’s nearly twice so when we look at
this data what are we whatever you’re
asking us where we stay so are we saying
that after the young males become 11 to
17
the apiece just stops or they’re no
longer victims
no what’s happening is they’re coming
out they’re reporting once they are
grown men we’re talking 10 20 30 years
after the abuse is happening and that’s
a problem so we need to ask ourselves
how would we normalized this idea of
sexual abuse potential assault being
only a female issue and why would then
not coming out earlier when it happens
so we have several contributing factors
one of his guarantee of masculinity and
we put this up socially at a very early
age we use phrases like toughen up stop
acting like a girl act like a man
and if you look at how we can interact
with our children take two children on
the playground they both all scripture
right they’re bleeding they both feel
pain but what happens is when the little
girl runs off
we embrace her we talk to her about her
pain we allow her to cry though then the
little boy runs up we brush him off he’s
home to be tough we clear away his tears
and we tell them if you boy go play and
it’s really important to give males the
opportunity to express their emotions
especially when being victimized we
allow our girls to display the
sensitivity but suddenly in this moments
we’ve somehow closed off the
conversation with our males and we told
them it’s no longer masculine to be
emotional or to discuss your pain or
share your vulnerabilities all victims
be feel embarrassed and ashamed but
males feel that shame especially once
they become the victim and then and
again because they feel like mourning
and this kind of goes against all of
that masculine mindset that we’ve
socially already established it is the
idea of not feeling this really
important because it’s perpetrators and
predators who first exploit that idea of
masculinity we teach our children to
blindly follow directions and we tell
them that they cost to listen to those
that are in power and authority and then
we have parents and caregivers trust and
respect that our children will
care for Furby traitors them especially
that many males don’t want to be
associated with being a victim or
weakness or emotional and they prey on
that they may threaten them with how
they’re going to be viewed they talk
about what has happened to their peers
and their loved ones they may even
threaten their social sexual orientation
so it’s the stigma and the idea of
weakness and vulnerability and shame
that’s associated with being a sexual
assault the sexual abuse victim that
furthers keeps these males silent
victims many other perpetrators also
placing themselves and positions at
which they know they’re going to be
engaging with children especially males
all right equip demand position of roles
like teachers coaches religious
affiliates they are family friends they
might be your loved ones they might even
be your own here all right an example is
how they in turn we need interactive
controls everyday coaches and players
smack each other on the bottom will say
good games we take our kids to the
doctor and we let the doctor examine
their naked bodies teens and boys will
wrestle with each other and these are
abnormal behaviors normally in deceptive
haters or perpetrators insider to a
twist that they’ve learned the lies and
what they do is they prey on these
victims and they destroy it and it makes
it hard for the making to differentiate
between what was the acceptable and your
normal behavior or what is now
unacceptable they allow their victims to
gain their trust and they make it
confusing and people is not to make
children or teens afraid or suspicious
or fearful of adults but we have to be
extremely transparent with them and we
can’t send them with blinders on out
into the world so it’s really important
to however I call uncomfortable
conversations and these are comfortable
conversations I’ve been told from
parents and friends come from there to
talk to our children about their bodies
and if some of the common common
conversations are stranger danger or bad
touch good touch and a lot of people
leave out the secret touch or that’s
when the third traitor predator is
telling the child that eating even young
adults to keep conversations and
occurrences secret and that should be a
red flag that if you’re having to keep
something secret
that’s not okay and it’s these
comfortable conversations in which we
need to change the masculine mindset to
not be associating victims with weakness
what we need to tell our nails is that
it takes a lot of strength and courage
and bravery to come out and speak out
when these things have happened and we
need to tell them that when you stand up
to a perpetrator or a predator in your
life you’re not just protecting yourself
but you’re stopping the victim
of others and that is heroic so that the
only person that needs to be associated
with shame in weakness needs to be the
perpetrator or the predator themselves
so how do we do this one we have to
disassociate these victim ideas and we
can’t make it all about female we have
to make it extremely inclusive and we
have to change our vocabulary to make
interfaith that L don’t want to be some
victims that they understand the
strength and character is standing out
and advocating for yourself normalizing
the reporting of sexual abuse to
decrease the stigma reporting has to be
the norm and it’s not just the idea that
we need to report reporting is the first
step to prevention so as long as we can
get female and beyond out into the world
to report these incidents happen we can
eventually stop them from happening or
occurring on other victims and last if
we talk they talk you have to have these
uncomfortable conversations and they
can’t feel uncomfortable anymore those
need to be the new norm and advocating
for your child is giving them the
toolset to go on to the world and
advocate for themselves especially male so that we can no longer have
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