[Music]
instead of inventing something related
to material science or other things that
I’ve invented in neuroscience today I’m
going to try to invent happiness and the
question is can we do this I’m going to
share with you the importance of doing
this and the driver for me is that after
my TED talk within a few months I had my
first daughter and afterwards I had my
second daughter only about a year and
half later and so those are their
pictures up there
you’ll see them around and in subjecting
myself to go undercover as a parent into
the education system not only was I
fingerprinted and I suddenly had this
realization right I said fatherhood you
know the closest thing I could describe
to it is like being bitten by a vampire
and now there’s this folklore right but
it’s like being bitten by a vampire and
all your senses come alive and you
suddenly find you’re vulnerable you’re
so vulnerable that you suddenly worry
like about their happiness now I’m
content myself and I’m thinking like
their happiness what’s the first thing
that’s gonna make them unhappy childcare
what’s the second thing school so that
comes rushing in my mind and one day I
say to my wife Theresa you’re doing your
masters how about we go to Hawaii or we
go somewhere and you don’t have to cook
at all well subject ourselves into
private boarding school I’ll do that and
you just stay in the in the same school
and I’ll be minutes away from the
classroom so I’ll start applying now
well lo and behold only within the week
or so I get hired and there’s this
school in Westchester New York that
hires me and says can you start Monday
so there we go
so I’m now in I go in there and and I
start teaching and I start thinking and
I start thinking more things about high
school since the first thing I know what
to do be having been a TED speaker is I
should watch some TED talks about
teaching and I should
got all the kinds of high schools and I
started thinking about all the things I
would learn and I found that high
schools have very high amounts of energy
and thanks to so many high schools that
devoted their video to allow us to see
you can see their effect
[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
so one thing we noticed there is a
tremendous amount of energy talent and
unified collaboration right now my
colleagues at the University is Nam at
said they didn’t see that they said this
is called career suicide midlife crisis
some kind of problem are you okay so so
then I I said you know I actually should
call up my pastor friend my lawyer
friend and my psychiatrist friend and we
here we are talking about children and
they gave me all kinds of advice that
was unacceptable to me and so I started
mapping out some make-believe
mathematical formulas and I don’t want
to say the word math because that scares
people right so this is make-believe and
I promise you it will be really simple
what I did was I wanted to find very
basic linkages between
over time how people acted how they
responded and I they wanted to see if
education or some kind of collective
thought was responsible for this so the
first equation is really simple it’s it
says war plus you and this is how we
acted as a human species going deep into
our history if we wanted something we’d
go and take it from somebody else but
then by the 60s we had realized that
this is collectively not a good idea and
so we decided to make love not war all
right and you those of you who lived
through that time we had flower power
and all these wonderful fuzzy things
except that love we made was not true
relationships so by the 1980s we had
realized largely that we should forget
all that we should just focus on making
money all right so as long as we made
money it was good and then we realized
that in 2000 we started running two
problems although the internet spawned
from this but at the same time by 2008
we would have the greatest recession we
never experienced and we said maybe the
equation shouldn’t even have that
variable so with today we are at you
that’s the equation just whatever it
takes to make you happy whatever it
takes may be that you like that
good that means iphone/ipad so I’m
thinking for my daughter isn’t like so
this is what you’re going to go into now
I had this thought before which is why I
didn’t have children earlier because I
was thinking maybe I could delay this
and avoid this mess right but you can
run but you can’t hide right so what I
had realized is I better go in there and
look into the depths of this and I came
up with this one that’s very complex and
that could scare you off so I’m gonna
explain this to you in a very simple way
this spells edify you have the e you
have the D you have the I and the F why
is edifying edify the definition means
to educate and to teach to the soul to
the mind to the heart real deep inside
and then perhaps if we do it that way we
can achieve happiness and FY stands for
finding yourself so let’s begin with e
and remember I said talking about
looking into TED talks enrichment
without an ego to teach this is what all
the TED Talks ha spoke about in fact you
know what scared me off was Sir Ken
Robinson’s TED talk that schools are
killing creativity that’s scary that
that is really scary now if I was not a
father I wouldn’t be so scared now I’m
father now I’m scared then I get into
the angry phase and I said I gotta go
and do something about this so I go in
right now then watch this this TED talk
by Azul Tyrone as’ and he messaged me as
long as I give him credit and we’re
supposed to do that because we tell
students not to plagiarize so here we
are right a great teacher sings I said
what the heck does that mean
right and he does his TED talk he’s not
singing right so I said alright I need
to go in there now I’m hired I’m going
to go into this private school and I’m
living with them 24/7 one of the songs I
came up with from ninth through twelfth
grade was also singing to middle school
and what I did was I said twinkle
twinkle little star there are actually
different types of stars up above we
classify brightness color chemical
composition I thought there were five oh
yes
size and temperature here are the other
two this is a song written by dr. chu
for you right and so it ends up lowering
the barrier of the relationship so that
I am NOT your teacher I am NOT teaching
to you like this type of relationship
but we’re actually on equal playing and
I am your star guide and you are my
stars and my role is to bring you to
become a superstar now that got a lot of
likes right you know I was the very like
a very very popular teacher and what had
happened was they said could you follow
me into my history class and could you
follow me into my other schools that I’m
going to go to University and that
immediately after the first day I said
ah my experiment is ruined tell actually
I don’t think I will have all the proper
data now remember I’m an inventor so I
think ahead and so I need to subject
myself in addition to being a private
school teacher because I couldn’t get
into the public schools I mean it would
delay me if I had to get a degree to do
this right so I said what I need to do
is I need to subject myself to become a
tutor as well so I can follow them
because I I can’t even give them my
phone number as a teacher so I said let
me go and become a tutor to in the
evenings and on the weekend so first as
the teacher you got to be fingerprinted
then there’s a tutor you have to be
tested like you have to actually go
through the a CT and SAT test at
multiple centers and so I said wait a
minute when I took the SAT I only got a
1200 so I don’t know if they’ll take me
these days there’s much higher standard
so I went in and tested and I get a 1600
on my SATs and I get a 36 on my a CTS
and multiple centers now and so all the
parents are calling saying wow you’ve
got the magic one yes I am your fairy
godfather and so here we go we go into
the the second letter right the second
letter I called the second pillar and
it’s called I am your defender what the
students would tell me you want to know
why I want to get a 36 or a 35 or even
33 is because those hot guys are there
the hot guys hot smart guys are at these
higher schools right so I said wow
that’s incredible information I never
would have gotten this information as a
teacher so I get this black book of
business all throughout North Jersey and
Westchester and and I get to collect my
data the most important thing was the
data and the students would come to me
and I would be and because I’m
interested in my data not for the the
work I said you know III provide service
for tutoring even in emergency services
emergency only two in the morning no
problem you call me and it’ll be like my
exam I will help you figure out these
teachers and we’ll strip them down and
we’ll figure out how to get those days
and I would talk to these students
tonight because of the neuroscience
background they never gave me a TED talk
for that one but I said we keep your
cortisol levels low and you can get
through any question right keep it low
keep it low and this you can even skip a
question and keep it low so so this
allowed me to bring students who one
student who couldn’t get past an 1100
broke through a fourteen hundred and
three sessions just by keeping the
cortisol right so it was became
legendary for doing that right so if you
google my name now you’re starting to
see this kind of stuff and I said maybe
I can invent an alias for myself and dr.
wholesome was born so that’s my email
dr. wholesome at gmail any kind of
problem you can email me related to
academia or things you have problems
with but then I said I need another
equation because as I’m watching these
TED Talks they you know the person who
spoke about this was a world famous
positive psychologist right and his name
is dr. Martin Seligman he says that this
is just temporary happiness this is
temporary this is pleasurable you know
you find the right dates in the right
college and then it all goes away and as
I watch this TED video he says the
ultimate happiness is finding true
long-term meaning by helping people
greater than you and then also taking
your skill sets and becoming truly
engaged I said then I must add I to the
third power here we go
inspiration integration and in-depth
conversations what does that mean it
means like hi how are you
and then you walk away they don’t leave
every they don’t get to respond and you
walk away you know that kind of move
well that has to go away with the
students and you inspire them you drive
them and you show them little tricks
that they really get excited about and
one trick is a very simple one the
number 51 right if you multiply that by
11 how do you do that right you know
you’re 11 multiplication table well very
quickly and under a minute I’m going to
show you how to do this you take the 5
and the 1 you separate them and the
number in the middle is the additive of
the 2 and numbers so it’s 561 now the
number like sixty one is 671 right so
the additive and so even numbers like
this don’t worry right we can take
numbers that are ten digits long and be
able multiply by 11 and do this so after
I got a chance to go through high school
and middle school in elementary school
and I’m running my research project I’m
figuring all this stuff out my daughters
are watching me do calculus on the
screen and I started finding out new
tricks new tricks and I create this book
right as long as you go through this
trick you’ll have incredibly high scores
you’ll be able to beat out the
competition and all these standardized
tests will no longer be a problem for
you but that doesn’t lead to ultimate
long-term happiness so I also insert
this is that you know have you ever
wondered where the universe comes from
have you under wonder wonder why you
know life is predetermined or is it like
or is it freewill and if it is freewill
is that why bad things could happen to
good people and you get the students
thinking and I start having to think do
you think there’s a job waiting for you
out there after you go to college or
maybe you should be creating the jobs
yourself and as I implant this kind of
thought in them they now become inspired
to do something even greater and I want
to share with you what has happened as I
have a case right here today all right
of two students one who flew from Brazil
back over here the other student who was
in my junior chemistry class they start
talking about innovation and they want
to now build a company there’s of course
really driven and they texted me last
night and said doc
are you going to introduce us to the
entire audience I said no because I’m
the speaker and you know what happens
after you’re the speaker is that you
gets warm they’re brought somewhere you
know and you know and that’s why I don’t
like being the speaker but you know what
you need to do you need to go and give
it a your all have no fear you actually
have to go and meet everybody and I
found I feel like I am a Zen master or
something that’s why I put like I put
over here finding yourself right you are
going to find yourself and thrive so
then I had another student his name is
Qaddafi right and he says I really want
to create jobs that have meaning meaning
for for individuals rather than in
Indonesia where you have mindless jobs
we’re used to a task and so that’s
beautiful that’s absolutely beautiful
let’s make that happen right so why I
share this with you is that if we all
embrace this then we could actually
affect change instead of waiting for
some president either the past president
of the current president or multiple
presidents down the line we are at a
critical moment right now we are truly
at a critical moment if we don’t act if
we don’t do something then the continued
violence to continue to anger the mass
shootings all those happen why because
we don’t get to open our gifts we’re all
gifted just like you saw in the video we
are all having those god-given gifts but
you know what happens when we why we’re
so angry and we’re mad as hell as my
friend a Gary shilling would say we’re
mad as hell is because we have less
buying power as less spending power and
when we open the gifts the gift has been
broken and what’s worse is when we open
our gift we have been broken so when I
say finding yourself it actually goes
into the depths the inside depths of not
the five physiological senses that were
checked in the hospital and every time
we go to the GP em they might check on
that but what the real problem is is our
sense of trust our sense of hope our
sense of pride is destroyed by coming
out and finding out where it laden with
debt so
my message to them is make sure you
start your company as a back-up plan
just in case all this college hoo-ha
doesn’t work out right because it’s
really just hoo-ha because I have like
two doctorates and I have all this other
stuff and I’m telling you something from
an inventor and because dr. wholesome
was born I get to do this I get to kneel
down with a kid right who’s in second
grade who’s in elementary in school and
I just have to say this to them I’ve
always wanted to say this mirror mirror
on the wall who I grow up when I am tall
and then I say to them it could be Elton
John it could be Marilyn Monroe it could
be Eleanor Roosevelt
it could be Audrey Hepburn but all those
characters are possible if you unleash
your gift so I ask of you today in
watching me subject myself to this this
kind of magical experience can we have a
happily ending ever after can we do that
can my time of spending these ten months
although it’s a great blessing that I’m
able to do this can I use this to remind
all of us do not let it go by
do not waste this opportunity and that’s
my message to share that we can create
happiness thank you
[Applause]
you
instead of inventing something related
to material science or other things that
I’ve invented in neuroscience today I’m
going to try to invent happiness and the
question is can we do this I’m going to
share with you the importance of doing
this and the driver for me is that after
my TED talk within a few months I had my
first daughter and afterwards I had my
second daughter only about a year and
half later and so those are their
pictures up there
you’ll see them around and in subjecting
myself to go undercover as a parent into
the education system not only was I
fingerprinted and I suddenly had this
realization right I said fatherhood you
know the closest thing I could describe
to it is like being bitten by a vampire
and now there’s this folklore right but
it’s like being bitten by a vampire and
all your senses come alive and you
suddenly find you’re vulnerable you’re
so vulnerable that you suddenly worry
like about their happiness now I’m
content myself and I’m thinking like
their happiness what’s the first thing
that’s gonna make them unhappy childcare
what’s the second thing school so that
comes rushing in my mind and one day I
say to my wife Theresa you’re doing your
masters how about we go to Hawaii or we
go somewhere and you don’t have to cook
at all well subject ourselves into
private boarding school I’ll do that and
you just stay in the in the same school
and I’ll be minutes away from the
classroom so I’ll start applying now
well lo and behold only within the week
or so I get hired and there’s this
school in Westchester New York that
hires me and says can you start Monday
so there we go
so I’m now in I go in there and and I
start teaching and I start thinking and
I start thinking more things about high
school since the first thing I know what
to do be having been a TED speaker is I
should watch some TED talks about
teaching and I should
got all the kinds of high schools and I
started thinking about all the things I
would learn and I found that high
schools have very high amounts of energy
and thanks to so many high schools that
devoted their video to allow us to see
you can see their effect
[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
so one thing we noticed there is a
tremendous amount of energy talent and
unified collaboration right now my
colleagues at the University is Nam at
said they didn’t see that they said this
is called career suicide midlife crisis
some kind of problem are you okay so so
then I I said you know I actually should
call up my pastor friend my lawyer
friend and my psychiatrist friend and we
here we are talking about children and
they gave me all kinds of advice that
was unacceptable to me and so I started
mapping out some make-believe
mathematical formulas and I don’t want
to say the word math because that scares
people right so this is make-believe and
I promise you it will be really simple
what I did was I wanted to find very
basic linkages between
over time how people acted how they
responded and I they wanted to see if
education or some kind of collective
thought was responsible for this so the
first equation is really simple it’s it
says war plus you and this is how we
acted as a human species going deep into
our history if we wanted something we’d
go and take it from somebody else but
then by the 60s we had realized that
this is collectively not a good idea and
so we decided to make love not war all
right and you those of you who lived
through that time we had flower power
and all these wonderful fuzzy things
except that love we made was not true
relationships so by the 1980s we had
realized largely that we should forget
all that we should just focus on making
money all right so as long as we made
money it was good and then we realized
that in 2000 we started running two
problems although the internet spawned
from this but at the same time by 2008
we would have the greatest recession we
never experienced and we said maybe the
equation shouldn’t even have that
variable so with today we are at you
that’s the equation just whatever it
takes to make you happy whatever it
takes may be that you like that
good that means iphone/ipad so I’m
thinking for my daughter isn’t like so
this is what you’re going to go into now
I had this thought before which is why I
didn’t have children earlier because I
was thinking maybe I could delay this
and avoid this mess right but you can
run but you can’t hide right so what I
had realized is I better go in there and
look into the depths of this and I came
up with this one that’s very complex and
that could scare you off so I’m gonna
explain this to you in a very simple way
this spells edify you have the e you
have the D you have the I and the F why
is edifying edify the definition means
to educate and to teach to the soul to
the mind to the heart real deep inside
and then perhaps if we do it that way we
can achieve happiness and FY stands for
finding yourself so let’s begin with e
and remember I said talking about
looking into TED talks enrichment
without an ego to teach this is what all
the TED Talks ha spoke about in fact you
know what scared me off was Sir Ken
Robinson’s TED talk that schools are
killing creativity that’s scary that
that is really scary now if I was not a
father I wouldn’t be so scared now I’m
father now I’m scared then I get into
the angry phase and I said I gotta go
and do something about this so I go in
right now then watch this this TED talk
by Azul Tyrone as’ and he messaged me as
long as I give him credit and we’re
supposed to do that because we tell
students not to plagiarize so here we
are right a great teacher sings I said
what the heck does that mean
right and he does his TED talk he’s not
singing right so I said alright I need
to go in there now I’m hired I’m going
to go into this private school and I’m
living with them 24/7 one of the songs I
came up with from ninth through twelfth
grade was also singing to middle school
and what I did was I said twinkle
twinkle little star there are actually
different types of stars up above we
classify brightness color chemical
composition I thought there were five oh
yes
size and temperature here are the other
two this is a song written by dr. chu
for you right and so it ends up lowering
the barrier of the relationship so that
I am NOT your teacher I am NOT teaching
to you like this type of relationship
but we’re actually on equal playing and
I am your star guide and you are my
stars and my role is to bring you to
become a superstar now that got a lot of
likes right you know I was the very like
a very very popular teacher and what had
happened was they said could you follow
me into my history class and could you
follow me into my other schools that I’m
going to go to University and that
immediately after the first day I said
ah my experiment is ruined tell actually
I don’t think I will have all the proper
data now remember I’m an inventor so I
think ahead and so I need to subject
myself in addition to being a private
school teacher because I couldn’t get
into the public schools I mean it would
delay me if I had to get a degree to do
this right so I said what I need to do
is I need to subject myself to become a
tutor as well so I can follow them
because I I can’t even give them my
phone number as a teacher so I said let
me go and become a tutor to in the
evenings and on the weekend so first as
the teacher you got to be fingerprinted
then there’s a tutor you have to be
tested like you have to actually go
through the a CT and SAT test at
multiple centers and so I said wait a
minute when I took the SAT I only got a
1200 so I don’t know if they’ll take me
these days there’s much higher standard
so I went in and tested and I get a 1600
on my SATs and I get a 36 on my a CTS
and multiple centers now and so all the
parents are calling saying wow you’ve
got the magic one yes I am your fairy
godfather and so here we go we go into
the the second letter right the second
letter I called the second pillar and
it’s called I am your defender what the
students would tell me you want to know
why I want to get a 36 or a 35 or even
33 is because those hot guys are there
the hot guys hot smart guys are at these
higher schools right so I said wow
that’s incredible information I never
would have gotten this information as a
teacher so I get this black book of
business all throughout North Jersey and
Westchester and and I get to collect my
data the most important thing was the
data and the students would come to me
and I would be and because I’m
interested in my data not for the the
work I said you know III provide service
for tutoring even in emergency services
emergency only two in the morning no
problem you call me and it’ll be like my
exam I will help you figure out these
teachers and we’ll strip them down and
we’ll figure out how to get those days
and I would talk to these students
tonight because of the neuroscience
background they never gave me a TED talk
for that one but I said we keep your
cortisol levels low and you can get
through any question right keep it low
keep it low and this you can even skip a
question and keep it low so so this
allowed me to bring students who one
student who couldn’t get past an 1100
broke through a fourteen hundred and
three sessions just by keeping the
cortisol right so it was became
legendary for doing that right so if you
google my name now you’re starting to
see this kind of stuff and I said maybe
I can invent an alias for myself and dr.
wholesome was born so that’s my email
dr. wholesome at gmail any kind of
problem you can email me related to
academia or things you have problems
with but then I said I need another
equation because as I’m watching these
TED Talks they you know the person who
spoke about this was a world famous
positive psychologist right and his name
is dr. Martin Seligman he says that this
is just temporary happiness this is
temporary this is pleasurable you know
you find the right dates in the right
college and then it all goes away and as
I watch this TED video he says the
ultimate happiness is finding true
long-term meaning by helping people
greater than you and then also taking
your skill sets and becoming truly
engaged I said then I must add I to the
third power here we go
inspiration integration and in-depth
conversations what does that mean it
means like hi how are you
and then you walk away they don’t leave
every they don’t get to respond and you
walk away you know that kind of move
well that has to go away with the
students and you inspire them you drive
them and you show them little tricks
that they really get excited about and
one trick is a very simple one the
number 51 right if you multiply that by
11 how do you do that right you know
you’re 11 multiplication table well very
quickly and under a minute I’m going to
show you how to do this you take the 5
and the 1 you separate them and the
number in the middle is the additive of
the 2 and numbers so it’s 561 now the
number like sixty one is 671 right so
the additive and so even numbers like
this don’t worry right we can take
numbers that are ten digits long and be
able multiply by 11 and do this so after
I got a chance to go through high school
and middle school in elementary school
and I’m running my research project I’m
figuring all this stuff out my daughters
are watching me do calculus on the
screen and I started finding out new
tricks new tricks and I create this book
right as long as you go through this
trick you’ll have incredibly high scores
you’ll be able to beat out the
competition and all these standardized
tests will no longer be a problem for
you but that doesn’t lead to ultimate
long-term happiness so I also insert
this is that you know have you ever
wondered where the universe comes from
have you under wonder wonder why you
know life is predetermined or is it like
or is it freewill and if it is freewill
is that why bad things could happen to
good people and you get the students
thinking and I start having to think do
you think there’s a job waiting for you
out there after you go to college or
maybe you should be creating the jobs
yourself and as I implant this kind of
thought in them they now become inspired
to do something even greater and I want
to share with you what has happened as I
have a case right here today all right
of two students one who flew from Brazil
back over here the other student who was
in my junior chemistry class they start
talking about innovation and they want
to now build a company there’s of course
really driven and they texted me last
night and said doc
are you going to introduce us to the
entire audience I said no because I’m
the speaker and you know what happens
after you’re the speaker is that you
gets warm they’re brought somewhere you
know and you know and that’s why I don’t
like being the speaker but you know what
you need to do you need to go and give
it a your all have no fear you actually
have to go and meet everybody and I
found I feel like I am a Zen master or
something that’s why I put like I put
over here finding yourself right you are
going to find yourself and thrive so
then I had another student his name is
Qaddafi right and he says I really want
to create jobs that have meaning meaning
for for individuals rather than in
Indonesia where you have mindless jobs
we’re used to a task and so that’s
beautiful that’s absolutely beautiful
let’s make that happen right so why I
share this with you is that if we all
embrace this then we could actually
affect change instead of waiting for
some president either the past president
of the current president or multiple
presidents down the line we are at a
critical moment right now we are truly
at a critical moment if we don’t act if
we don’t do something then the continued
violence to continue to anger the mass
shootings all those happen why because
we don’t get to open our gifts we’re all
gifted just like you saw in the video we
are all having those god-given gifts but
you know what happens when we why we’re
so angry and we’re mad as hell as my
friend a Gary shilling would say we’re
mad as hell is because we have less
buying power as less spending power and
when we open the gifts the gift has been
broken and what’s worse is when we open
our gift we have been broken so when I
say finding yourself it actually goes
into the depths the inside depths of not
the five physiological senses that were
checked in the hospital and every time
we go to the GP em they might check on
that but what the real problem is is our
sense of trust our sense of hope our
sense of pride is destroyed by coming
out and finding out where it laden with
debt so
my message to them is make sure you
start your company as a back-up plan
just in case all this college hoo-ha
doesn’t work out right because it’s
really just hoo-ha because I have like
two doctorates and I have all this other
stuff and I’m telling you something from
an inventor and because dr. wholesome
was born I get to do this I get to kneel
down with a kid right who’s in second
grade who’s in elementary in school and
I just have to say this to them I’ve
always wanted to say this mirror mirror
on the wall who I grow up when I am tall
and then I say to them it could be Elton
John it could be Marilyn Monroe it could
be Eleanor Roosevelt
it could be Audrey Hepburn but all those
characters are possible if you unleash
your gift so I ask of you today in
watching me subject myself to this this
kind of magical experience can we have a
happily ending ever after can we do that
can my time of spending these ten months
although it’s a great blessing that I’m
able to do this can I use this to remind
all of us do not let it go by
do not waste this opportunity and that’s
my message to share that we can create
happiness thank you
[Applause]
you
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