hello there my name is James a
McCallister and I am a true maverick
extraordinaire I am also a professional
hypocrite
and I am mentally ill you see it’s like
this I have this alter ego I created his
name is denis alexander but the crazy
thing is
he claims he created me confused yeah me
too okay let’s see here I’m a true
maverick extraordinaire I’m a
professional hypocrite and I’m mentally
ill plus I got this alter ego so you’re
tying it all together okay well let’s
try this let’s first define what I mean
by professional hypocrite okay now
professional is somebody who gets paid
for what they do and the hypocrite well
that’s what the ancient Greeks called
their actors because they were behaving
like somebody that they were not there
for a professional hypocrite is a paid
actor now just a qualifier that ever
never actually been in a play a TV show
or a movie and got paid for it no when I
say that I’m a professional hypocrite
what I mean is that I’ve mastered the
art of behaving as if I am normal so I
can get and keep jobs that pay and
that’s his jobs but also I can get and
keep friends and spouse as well as you
probably guessed by now I am NOT normal
you see some nine years ago
when I was at 40 I was diagnosed as very
high-functioning autistic but check this
out
when I tell people that I’m autistic
they often tell me well you’re doing
really well doing really well you see
what they mean is I do a really good job
of behaving as if I am normal hmm
interesting
funny thing is I wasn’t putting on an
act when I was telling them that I was
just being my true natural autistic self
you see when I was a kid people would
often tell me to stop acting and just be
myself so I learned how to act like with
somebody else so they stop saying that
yeah I’m still confused about that too
well as you should guess playing
hypocrite your entire life is extremely
stressful I mean my autistic brain is
not socially intelligent in fact you
might call me socially retarded now the
word retarded is not a bad word but a
technically accurate word how bad humans
choose to use the word to belittle
others well that’s another story but
here’s the real story I am a tumeric
extraordinaire I
no matter which crowd I stand a part of
autism is giving me super powers I mean
check this out I have a genius IQ and a
brain cramp packed with knowledge and
tons of subjects I have I tend to be
hyper aware of my surroundings and I
have the power of hyper focus
I’m very mechanically inclined and I’m a
fantastic cook I’m a winemaker and I
write incredible music I’ve made a I’m
producing my own fooling feature film I
have made thousands of drawings and
technical blueprints of buildings and
machines that I have also built I also
have a powerful sense of logic structure
in order that most can’t even come close
to I’ve dabbled in electronics and
chemistry since I was a kid I have
architect it installed maintained entire
computer networks and infrastructures I
have an I am a true maverick
extraordinaire I have a fantastically
wonderful brain I love my incredible
autistic brain but I hate what normal
society has done to my mind you see
I suffer because I’m autistic now I
don’t suffer from the autism but rather
I suffer from the way I’ve been treated
because I’m autistic I mean I love being
autistic that’s not the problem the
problem is when I was a child I was not
mentally ill but I am now because of
society now some people may prefer the
term mental disorders but I like to call
things what they really are this thing
is sick it doesn’t work like it used to
anymore I am now mentally ill oh wait oh
my goodness did I just tell the whole
world I’m mentally ill am I supposed to
be ashamed why I mean are you shamed in
your stomach gets ill anyway I didn’t
make myself mentally ill Society did
that you see this is how it happened in
kindergarten I discovered that there are
kids who thought that their fifth blind
what my nose had been well began to
develop a healthy case of anxiety they
also made sure I understood that I was
inferior to them so developed the
healthy sense of low self-worth by high
school I developed a healthy sense was a
case of depression and at the age of 41
well a healthy brick wall called
post-traumatic stress disorder ran into
me normal had ruined me I found myself
imprisoned in my own basement playing
solitaire for a few years
yeah I had my to-do list but every time
I try to do the simplest tasks that need
to get done my brain would literally
just shut down and he said I’d find
myself standing on the third step
staring upwards wondering how long I’d
been standing there and I’d realized
that there was a wall in my mind that I
could not cross I didn’t know a brain
could do that I didn’t understand how I
got to such a horrible state of mind I
mean I was always a loyal friend I was
an incredibly good hypocrite doing my
best to behave normally and outstanding
skills at work and was a role model
employee but I can’t always hide that
I’m autistic to get a paycheck I had to
become a hypocrite I didn’t even know
that that was what I was doing
eventually I just broke down from all
that stress here’s the tragic part I’m
not the only one you see millions of us
particularly high-functioning autistic
s– often end up drug addicts alcoholics
homeless unemployed to unfairly
victimized and even suicidal
in fact we are nine times more suicidal
than the average population because of
all that stress forced upon us to behave
normally a recent study found that we
have a live stand about sixteen years
less than the average population because
of all that stress so I get to die young
because you don’t like the way my brain
functions it doesn’t function badly or
criminally in fact autistics are noted
for insistence on fairness and following
the rules and our brain function needs
to change well think about this you’ve
heard that autism is on the rise right
well if that’s true then what happens
when there are more autistics then there
are normals will you be required to
behave artistically all right everybody
here’s your first lesson on how to
behave like an autistic I want everybody
to shake their hands like this come on
now everyone you too now I’ve seen
athletes shake it out and they’re cool
all right so this is what’s called
stimming and it relieves stress and
anxiety okay now put your hands on your
labs this is called quiet hands but if
your environment is attacking you
flickering lights irritating sounds too
much activity around your conversational
stress by not stemming the autistic is
headed for a Mel
down you lose your autistic superpowers
and become an upset emotional pile of
you it’s horrible please don’t force us
to practice quiet hands or other
socially acceptable behavior if we need
to stim we need to stim all right
everybody listen number two I want all
of you to turn and look at your neighbor
right in their eyes come on now turn to
your neighbor look right into those
eyeballs keep looking
getting uncomfortable keep looking feel
that anxiety building up keep staring
too much data for you to handle keep
staring now imagine that stress building
up until a fire in your brain word you
can’t think straight
okay keep staring and answer this
question what were you doing yesterday
at 10:23 a.m. how many of you looked
away are all of you liars you can stare
back up at me now science has proven you
cannot tell if somebody’s lying to you
through their eyes the FBI knows this
autistics have always known this so
please don’t ever demand that we ever
looked you in the eye got it anyway it
can be torture alright
lesson number three on the count of
three I want all of you to ask me how
are you doing today ready 1 2 3
do you really care if not why do you
bother asking I mean every time I answer
that question truthfully I get in
trouble people tell me I’m just supposed
to say fine but usually that’s a lie in
lines not polite anyway when I asked I
actually want to know you see it has
been found that autists extended me more
empathetic than normal humans we just
don’t do a good job of expressing it
well you know we’re socially retarded
kind like it’s how you tend to be
empathetically retarded people here’s
the thing there are a lot of therapies
and social norms out there being thrust
on autistics that force us to behave
normally and a lot of what you require
is just wrong anyway as I have just
demonstrated in my case I ended up for
severe anxiety major depression and
severe emotional trauma and that was
without those therapies that was just
society requiring that I behave normally
you cannot fake an act like that your
entire life
I tried your mind will break listen we
are not bad or inferior just because our
thinking and behaviors different our
brains are just wired differently that’s
all and think about this that which is
socially acceptable is cultural and
cultures change all the time I mean
everybody has a different version of
what normal is right well in the
autistic community we generally hate
these behavioral requirements in
therapies because they’re damaging but
parents and teachers love these
therapies therapists insist on it but
we’re the ones who are made to suffer
the damage another point I feel I must
make is it a lot of what you perceive as
autism isn’t autism it’s actually the
results of the sad diet you know the
standard American diet in the way that
it can really screw up the way your
brain functions you know so now think
about this instead of feeding kids with
their brains require you torture them to
behave differently really I don’t have
bad behavior because autism is not a
behavior it’s a label for a type of
brain wiring that is permanent and
cannot be cured and you want to cure us
how terribly offensive autism defines us
we are not a disease or mental illness
stupid humans sorry
I’m getting upset I need a break stupid
humans I apologize for that we often
feel like we must be from another planet
now I created
mr. James in McAlester before I knew I
was autistic
before PTSD I thought I was just
creating an interesting fun and dynamic
print alter-ego you know I didn’t
realize that what I was really doing was
recreating myself rediscovering myself
my true native natural autistic self who
I wanted to be what I should have been
now everyone I believe should be on a
journey of self-discovery
self-improvement that’s the journey I
thought I was on but I was on the wrong
path I wasn’t born on the wrong path I
was just born on a different path I was
forced onto the wrong path and I became
the wrong person I became a hypocrite
and I didn’t even know it now I’ve been
recreating myself through James taking
the best parts of him and merging them
back into myself to create one one great
and wonderful person it’s the goal at
least it ain’t easy as you can imagine
learning who you really are all over
again James by the way is not the
professional hypocrite I Denis Alexander
I am I was the one forced to alter my
own personage way of thinking and
behaving just to get and keep jobs the
spouse and friends you know and James
was just a desperate attempt at finding
myself again you know what I found I
didn’t have amazing talents vast
knowledge and all sorts of subjects and
I’ve acquired tons of skills that most
people would love to have I am a true
maverick extraordinaire a poly skilled
polymath a jack-of-all-trades master of
some but I can’t work a job anymore
but with all the normal requirements
they broke me with and I shouldn’t
instead I now look for opportunities you
see first autistics it’s all about
finding our niche for instance einstein
ben franklin beethoven and many others
many other famous people they were
either diagnosed or most likely were
autistic they found their way and the
sooner each of us finds our way the
better so that we can skip all the
horrible life sucking stress
unfortunately for most of us we never
find that so is autism a disability or a
different ability I mean is normal
really better anyway well let’s see
because of us you have computers
smartphones the Internet electricity
radios tons of movies books and and
music and so much of your life that you
take for granted we gave that to you in
spite of that like so many of us I now
have a choice before me poverty or
insanity now I hate poverty but I cannot
go back to that mental state of mental
illness there’s a third option though
many companies and their numbers are
growing who recognized the value of
neuro diversity companies who value the
strengths found not just in autistics
but ADHD and other different abilities
they value the serious positive impact
we can have on their bottom line that
now look we’ve got autism 80 ADHD OCD
Tourette’s syndrome prosopagnosia
distracted dyslexia apraxia alexithymia
discount
you’ve all got something that we can
label and maybe that’s the problem
I mean labeling things for the sake of
sorting for identifying for
understanding is fine but when it’s done
to denigrate your fellow human come on
now it has to be recognized that nobody
is normal you are not normal
everyone has disabilities of some kind
am I not right everyone of us is
retarded in some way I believe that
every single one of us is also mentally
ill I mean how can you not be living
life in this crazy world but everyone on
this planet is also a genius in
something in some way all of you are
geniuses we all have amazing and diverse
skills and talents do we not I think we
just need to learn to be ourselves
I think we need to learn to appreciate
not just what great things we have but
also our own in abilities without fear
there are some things you will never be
able to do and that’s okay all of you
should just embrace that you are each
and every one a true maverick
extraordinaire
just like I am I am proud that I am
autistic but autism awareness is not
enough and don’t just learn to accept us
learn what makes us tick and why learn
to appreciate neuro diversity learn to
embrace no diversity and the synergy
that it can bring learn to love no
diversity I think that’s a great idea
that wonderful idea we’re spreading and
if we all did just imagine what could be
around the corner Wow
you know James is not going away he’s
too much fun you know I really like this
hat y’all be good now you hear
[Applause]
McCallister and I am a true maverick
extraordinaire I am also a professional
hypocrite
and I am mentally ill you see it’s like
this I have this alter ego I created his
name is denis alexander but the crazy
thing is
he claims he created me confused yeah me
too okay let’s see here I’m a true
maverick extraordinaire I’m a
professional hypocrite and I’m mentally
ill plus I got this alter ego so you’re
tying it all together okay well let’s
try this let’s first define what I mean
by professional hypocrite okay now
professional is somebody who gets paid
for what they do and the hypocrite well
that’s what the ancient Greeks called
their actors because they were behaving
like somebody that they were not there
for a professional hypocrite is a paid
actor now just a qualifier that ever
never actually been in a play a TV show
or a movie and got paid for it no when I
say that I’m a professional hypocrite
what I mean is that I’ve mastered the
art of behaving as if I am normal so I
can get and keep jobs that pay and
that’s his jobs but also I can get and
keep friends and spouse as well as you
probably guessed by now I am NOT normal
you see some nine years ago
when I was at 40 I was diagnosed as very
high-functioning autistic but check this
out
when I tell people that I’m autistic
they often tell me well you’re doing
really well doing really well you see
what they mean is I do a really good job
of behaving as if I am normal hmm
interesting
funny thing is I wasn’t putting on an
act when I was telling them that I was
just being my true natural autistic self
you see when I was a kid people would
often tell me to stop acting and just be
myself so I learned how to act like with
somebody else so they stop saying that
yeah I’m still confused about that too
well as you should guess playing
hypocrite your entire life is extremely
stressful I mean my autistic brain is
not socially intelligent in fact you
might call me socially retarded now the
word retarded is not a bad word but a
technically accurate word how bad humans
choose to use the word to belittle
others well that’s another story but
here’s the real story I am a tumeric
extraordinaire I
no matter which crowd I stand a part of
autism is giving me super powers I mean
check this out I have a genius IQ and a
brain cramp packed with knowledge and
tons of subjects I have I tend to be
hyper aware of my surroundings and I
have the power of hyper focus
I’m very mechanically inclined and I’m a
fantastic cook I’m a winemaker and I
write incredible music I’ve made a I’m
producing my own fooling feature film I
have made thousands of drawings and
technical blueprints of buildings and
machines that I have also built I also
have a powerful sense of logic structure
in order that most can’t even come close
to I’ve dabbled in electronics and
chemistry since I was a kid I have
architect it installed maintained entire
computer networks and infrastructures I
have an I am a true maverick
extraordinaire I have a fantastically
wonderful brain I love my incredible
autistic brain but I hate what normal
society has done to my mind you see
I suffer because I’m autistic now I
don’t suffer from the autism but rather
I suffer from the way I’ve been treated
because I’m autistic I mean I love being
autistic that’s not the problem the
problem is when I was a child I was not
mentally ill but I am now because of
society now some people may prefer the
term mental disorders but I like to call
things what they really are this thing
is sick it doesn’t work like it used to
anymore I am now mentally ill oh wait oh
my goodness did I just tell the whole
world I’m mentally ill am I supposed to
be ashamed why I mean are you shamed in
your stomach gets ill anyway I didn’t
make myself mentally ill Society did
that you see this is how it happened in
kindergarten I discovered that there are
kids who thought that their fifth blind
what my nose had been well began to
develop a healthy case of anxiety they
also made sure I understood that I was
inferior to them so developed the
healthy sense of low self-worth by high
school I developed a healthy sense was a
case of depression and at the age of 41
well a healthy brick wall called
post-traumatic stress disorder ran into
me normal had ruined me I found myself
imprisoned in my own basement playing
solitaire for a few years
yeah I had my to-do list but every time
I try to do the simplest tasks that need
to get done my brain would literally
just shut down and he said I’d find
myself standing on the third step
staring upwards wondering how long I’d
been standing there and I’d realized
that there was a wall in my mind that I
could not cross I didn’t know a brain
could do that I didn’t understand how I
got to such a horrible state of mind I
mean I was always a loyal friend I was
an incredibly good hypocrite doing my
best to behave normally and outstanding
skills at work and was a role model
employee but I can’t always hide that
I’m autistic to get a paycheck I had to
become a hypocrite I didn’t even know
that that was what I was doing
eventually I just broke down from all
that stress here’s the tragic part I’m
not the only one you see millions of us
particularly high-functioning autistic
s– often end up drug addicts alcoholics
homeless unemployed to unfairly
victimized and even suicidal
in fact we are nine times more suicidal
than the average population because of
all that stress forced upon us to behave
normally a recent study found that we
have a live stand about sixteen years
less than the average population because
of all that stress so I get to die young
because you don’t like the way my brain
functions it doesn’t function badly or
criminally in fact autistics are noted
for insistence on fairness and following
the rules and our brain function needs
to change well think about this you’ve
heard that autism is on the rise right
well if that’s true then what happens
when there are more autistics then there
are normals will you be required to
behave artistically all right everybody
here’s your first lesson on how to
behave like an autistic I want everybody
to shake their hands like this come on
now everyone you too now I’ve seen
athletes shake it out and they’re cool
all right so this is what’s called
stimming and it relieves stress and
anxiety okay now put your hands on your
labs this is called quiet hands but if
your environment is attacking you
flickering lights irritating sounds too
much activity around your conversational
stress by not stemming the autistic is
headed for a Mel
down you lose your autistic superpowers
and become an upset emotional pile of
you it’s horrible please don’t force us
to practice quiet hands or other
socially acceptable behavior if we need
to stim we need to stim all right
everybody listen number two I want all
of you to turn and look at your neighbor
right in their eyes come on now turn to
your neighbor look right into those
eyeballs keep looking
getting uncomfortable keep looking feel
that anxiety building up keep staring
too much data for you to handle keep
staring now imagine that stress building
up until a fire in your brain word you
can’t think straight
okay keep staring and answer this
question what were you doing yesterday
at 10:23 a.m. how many of you looked
away are all of you liars you can stare
back up at me now science has proven you
cannot tell if somebody’s lying to you
through their eyes the FBI knows this
autistics have always known this so
please don’t ever demand that we ever
looked you in the eye got it anyway it
can be torture alright
lesson number three on the count of
three I want all of you to ask me how
are you doing today ready 1 2 3
do you really care if not why do you
bother asking I mean every time I answer
that question truthfully I get in
trouble people tell me I’m just supposed
to say fine but usually that’s a lie in
lines not polite anyway when I asked I
actually want to know you see it has
been found that autists extended me more
empathetic than normal humans we just
don’t do a good job of expressing it
well you know we’re socially retarded
kind like it’s how you tend to be
empathetically retarded people here’s
the thing there are a lot of therapies
and social norms out there being thrust
on autistics that force us to behave
normally and a lot of what you require
is just wrong anyway as I have just
demonstrated in my case I ended up for
severe anxiety major depression and
severe emotional trauma and that was
without those therapies that was just
society requiring that I behave normally
you cannot fake an act like that your
entire life
I tried your mind will break listen we
are not bad or inferior just because our
thinking and behaviors different our
brains are just wired differently that’s
all and think about this that which is
socially acceptable is cultural and
cultures change all the time I mean
everybody has a different version of
what normal is right well in the
autistic community we generally hate
these behavioral requirements in
therapies because they’re damaging but
parents and teachers love these
therapies therapists insist on it but
we’re the ones who are made to suffer
the damage another point I feel I must
make is it a lot of what you perceive as
autism isn’t autism it’s actually the
results of the sad diet you know the
standard American diet in the way that
it can really screw up the way your
brain functions you know so now think
about this instead of feeding kids with
their brains require you torture them to
behave differently really I don’t have
bad behavior because autism is not a
behavior it’s a label for a type of
brain wiring that is permanent and
cannot be cured and you want to cure us
how terribly offensive autism defines us
we are not a disease or mental illness
stupid humans sorry
I’m getting upset I need a break stupid
humans I apologize for that we often
feel like we must be from another planet
now I created
mr. James in McAlester before I knew I
was autistic
before PTSD I thought I was just
creating an interesting fun and dynamic
print alter-ego you know I didn’t
realize that what I was really doing was
recreating myself rediscovering myself
my true native natural autistic self who
I wanted to be what I should have been
now everyone I believe should be on a
journey of self-discovery
self-improvement that’s the journey I
thought I was on but I was on the wrong
path I wasn’t born on the wrong path I
was just born on a different path I was
forced onto the wrong path and I became
the wrong person I became a hypocrite
and I didn’t even know it now I’ve been
recreating myself through James taking
the best parts of him and merging them
back into myself to create one one great
and wonderful person it’s the goal at
least it ain’t easy as you can imagine
learning who you really are all over
again James by the way is not the
professional hypocrite I Denis Alexander
I am I was the one forced to alter my
own personage way of thinking and
behaving just to get and keep jobs the
spouse and friends you know and James
was just a desperate attempt at finding
myself again you know what I found I
didn’t have amazing talents vast
knowledge and all sorts of subjects and
I’ve acquired tons of skills that most
people would love to have I am a true
maverick extraordinaire a poly skilled
polymath a jack-of-all-trades master of
some but I can’t work a job anymore
but with all the normal requirements
they broke me with and I shouldn’t
instead I now look for opportunities you
see first autistics it’s all about
finding our niche for instance einstein
ben franklin beethoven and many others
many other famous people they were
either diagnosed or most likely were
autistic they found their way and the
sooner each of us finds our way the
better so that we can skip all the
horrible life sucking stress
unfortunately for most of us we never
find that so is autism a disability or a
different ability I mean is normal
really better anyway well let’s see
because of us you have computers
smartphones the Internet electricity
radios tons of movies books and and
music and so much of your life that you
take for granted we gave that to you in
spite of that like so many of us I now
have a choice before me poverty or
insanity now I hate poverty but I cannot
go back to that mental state of mental
illness there’s a third option though
many companies and their numbers are
growing who recognized the value of
neuro diversity companies who value the
strengths found not just in autistics
but ADHD and other different abilities
they value the serious positive impact
we can have on their bottom line that
now look we’ve got autism 80 ADHD OCD
Tourette’s syndrome prosopagnosia
distracted dyslexia apraxia alexithymia
discount
you’ve all got something that we can
label and maybe that’s the problem
I mean labeling things for the sake of
sorting for identifying for
understanding is fine but when it’s done
to denigrate your fellow human come on
now it has to be recognized that nobody
is normal you are not normal
everyone has disabilities of some kind
am I not right everyone of us is
retarded in some way I believe that
every single one of us is also mentally
ill I mean how can you not be living
life in this crazy world but everyone on
this planet is also a genius in
something in some way all of you are
geniuses we all have amazing and diverse
skills and talents do we not I think we
just need to learn to be ourselves
I think we need to learn to appreciate
not just what great things we have but
also our own in abilities without fear
there are some things you will never be
able to do and that’s okay all of you
should just embrace that you are each
and every one a true maverick
extraordinaire
just like I am I am proud that I am
autistic but autism awareness is not
enough and don’t just learn to accept us
learn what makes us tick and why learn
to appreciate neuro diversity learn to
embrace no diversity and the synergy
that it can bring learn to love no
diversity I think that’s a great idea
that wonderful idea we’re spreading and
if we all did just imagine what could be
around the corner Wow
you know James is not going away he’s
too much fun you know I really like this
hat y’all be good now you hear
[Applause]
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