we have an interesting topic here so let
me introduce myself my name is Sandra
Cole Hondo and I have lots of phobia now
before I can share what grossest phobias
all about let me ask you how many of you
a telephone BIA what a fancy name it’s a
fear of being imperfect or having a lot
of imperfections yeah you have I didn’t
know a that fancy terms for my phobia
yeah what about your phobia
have you heard some began you don’t be
so happy some things bad doesn’t happen
mm-hmm that’s a phobia we’ve all been
very familiar with this one
what about the next one which is
Anthropy phobia I know have this in
school the fear of being judged
specially managed to go up and present I
tell you my examples of my y1 okay how
yeah I I did that a lot and as my
parents found out I was pretending and
if I know one there was a fancy name to
it there probably did die as the mean
your phobia I think I’m still trying to
figure this one out it’s the fear of
going to school so why were you talking
about fears and phobias with all of you
what makes me qualified enough to talk
about it here it’s because majority of
my life
I allowed fear to learn me and restrict
my growth and I didn’t find who I was
until they came a time where I said you
know that’s it I’ve had enough I need to
find who I am behind all these fears and
the next two phobias are my personal
conquest its acrophobia fear of heights
and closer phobia fear of public
speaking I had them for many many years
taking care of them very deeply until I
decided to break them and do things that
I would never never have dreamt of to
overcome these two phobias and the next
couple of minutes I’d like to share with
you how I attempted to both of these two
phobias one of them you’re experiencing
here and now standing up in front of you
and it’s it’s quite interesting when you
talk about phobias for me it all started
with let me understand what fear is all
about because as I make people and and I
thought walking a lot people have a life
coach and the nice everyone has fears
and Sonja’s not realizing inevitable you
just cannot escape it
so let’s so I thought let’s figure this
demon out let’s understand where he’s
coming from and the more he studied and
researched and did a lot of personal
experiments I actually do realize the
great thing to have a number one it’s a
natural biological process you cannot
not have here will always have here it
is ingrained in us if we did not have
here our species would never have
survived millions of the Earth’s so
feared actually helped us come a long
long way it is there to protect us so
that we continue to survive in this
world and let’s understand a little bit
more about what fit so the Oxford
Dictionary calls fear
a very strong emotion that is caused by
an anticipation awareness of danger and
it is day to immediately protect you
from from huh
but how does it work in ayodhya process
we have this clever thing going to the
brain the brain is the one that concerns
a lot of fears some of them are really
valid and some of them are meda so let’s
let’s talk about the valid ones and get
them aside and we know what that is all
about so how it works is when you come
across a stressful stimuli which could
be a snake it could be a clown on your
head or in my case it could be an
audience we can learn to speak the body
starts reacting and developing chemicals
to take care of this fear which would be
in the form of your muscles tightening
you heart beating faster your arms ready
your breath would really shallow because
your body is getting ready to fight or
flight this is what typically you’d done
oh yeah an almost even ancestors would
have done is when you see danger your
body gets ready to run away or fight it
and that’s how the brain is developed so
if you see this I’ve got a picture
premium-grade so if you see when our
sensory organs take an information that
is your eye skin touch takes an
information it states this information
dealer to a brief particle thalamus
that’s the center that collects this
information and decides we need to set
the separation – so thalamus sends two
signals the fastest shortest route goes
to the amygdala which is the brains
threat center it designed it is a threat
and I need to protect this being from
being frightened and so what happens is
it starts getting you for your body or
main sometimes we don’t even know where
not even aware that we had a threat and
we are responding to feel like there’s
this loud song at the front door and
forget think who’s at the front door you
already prepared yeah oh yeah oh just
your body’s trembling oh you just
shocked what’s happening and you’re
ready to just run to see what’s
happening that the automatic syndrome
that was and then it goes to your point
funder brought to context the second set
up which is the new brain which is the
analytical thinking brain that actually
figures out whether the sound is a real
threat a threat to survival and then I
need to find a flight or it is actually
not a threat to survival it’s a fear
that that’s just come on you so what
happens is once you realize that this
fear is a threat is not a trigger
survival is a trick to overcoming this
fear because fear can be imagined and
that imagination can be taken as real in
your brain so for us it gets very
important to understand what fear is all
about and for me it took a process of
really understanding which aspect is
thus taking care of once the fear of
danger is taken care of then I need to
figure out where this is coming from and
during my research I realize there are
two sources where these fears come from
the first source lives in the past
it comes from past experiences it comes
from experience and again you point your
hands if you’ve gone through a trauma
you’ve had an accident you’ve gone
through an experience that is ready to a
belief of fear and that takes a little
longer process to get over that fear
what scientists believe is fear releases
stress hormones that strain
memories in you and these memories are
not flashback memories and so whenever
you need to recall a painful incident
it’s really fast because it kind of
strengthens it if I asked you what you
had for lunch day before yesterday would
you remember now but if I asked you to
share a painful experience or a memory
you’ll be surprised to find out my
nudist details you remember that what
happened years ago that’s how it works
in terms of strengthens memory but the
first step to overcoming this fear is
releasing that memory from the emotion
and this process is known as
conditioning there are fear conditioning
that’s happening that’s extinction
conditioning so let me just explain that
and this is one classic example happened
I don’t know whether you’ve read about
there’s a classic example of fear
conditioning that was taught by dr.
Watson with a child called little Albert
what had happened was the child was not
afraid of white rats but whenever that
white rat was paid with a loud scary
sound for repeatedly the child started
developing a fear of white light so much
so every time a white light appeared you
just get a book and that fear extended
to all white fuzzy objects that is how
you develop a fear conditioning and to
break that which you all are looking
towards is you just the opposite you
bear a stressful incident with something
that’s more calming and neutral for
example how many of you been attacked or
bitten by a dog quite a few ready so and
another this experience a lot of my
daughter’s children would come home and
they’ve been
that really scared the bed at all so
when somebody’s been attacked by a dog
they develop a negative experience
around dogs they mean that they may
develop a lasting fear of dogs and that
can be removed from a long process by
conditioning and exposing them to very
gently loving dogs just the opposite of
what they’ve been attacked and the more
time they spend with loving dogs they’re
able to disassociate than a negative
experience with the dog and that is how
you start removing or thinking the fear
conditioning in somebody now I want to
move to some of my fears which I
experienced a lot which is undisputed
here and the space feels basically
there’s no fear you’ll never experienced
it but you love to eating it in your
mind so any new or challenging
situations you think works in the cycle
of creating anxiety within you and that
anxiety leads to panic and panic creates
a lot of negative thoughts about the
situation if you remember you if you get
into any new situation you realize that
you just get so many negative well about
the situation of everything that could
go wrong it kind of paralyzes you it
stops you from taking that job that you
want to do and that’s where the whole
work happens and stopping this village
process in taking that stand and for me
mostly both my phobias were related to
an aspen tree for a period I started
with first working on myself and
understanding what is the data I have to
work on the belief that I have do I have
a past experience that I’ve done where I
made a fool of myself public speaking
no do I have any data that will prove
that I’m not going to be good at public
speaking
No so what stops me from starting off
small so in my close of phobia I started
taking a very small step which was in my
comfort zone
starting with speaking
my life we’ve been studying speaking to
my team colleagues my friends and then
expanding that little comic relief’s to
their senior levels an organization’s
good neighbors and then finally opening
a company that only does corporate
training doing that day-in day-out else
and then eventually come to a public
forum in speed there was a big step that
took one ladder at a time to reach the
aspiration of overcoming this public
fear the other fear is a little more
complicated which is my fear of heights
and that is something I said you know
I’m going to take a surgical step
towards it I’m gonna do something that
at one gram able to overcome it and I
said what is the highest place I can go
and dig up this fear and the highest
things that I think of was jumping off a
flight up okay so my first step was let
me must prepare myself maybe read a lot
about it research what is the safest
place for me to do a tandem skydive zero
that on a per the safest place on earth
to jump from I’ve done a lot of research
so that a lot of motivating stuff of
people who have gone through the jump
and how that’s affected me I thought my
support systems as well I got my husband
and my aunt to actually get into the
plane with me so that over they have a
panic I have them around me and then
instead of the plane all excited ready
to jump after all of my bases covered
and it’s gonna be a beautiful experience
until in front of me I see a guy sitting
with a parachute with a big red message
saying danger and on that parachute that
was enough for me to trigger all my fear
signals I was so scared that I had made
the worst decision in my life because
that had triggered Miami
automatic response suddenly I realized I
was buckled up it was all loose and I
would have fallen died outside the sky
it just seemed like a bed trap it didn’t
seem like a beautiful sky anymore and it
all just happened a couple of seconds
and I was leading the end and my jumper
said on the count of three we jump nice
no no no my eyes most dreadful
experience ever
I’m not going to see success one two and
he jumps at the count of two but there’s
no three and as soon as we jumped I
thought I was gonna die because what
happens when your mapping data triggers
your heart starts beating faster you
start getting nervous your body soil
Titans were forgotten instructions he’s
told me with my hands and I’m all
nervous and really really asked and what
do you need at 13,000 feet you need
oxygen and you can also do it by being
breathing slowly and deeply so that time
my thought was I don’t think I’m gonna
even make it on the ground I’m just
going to die of lack of oxygen because
that was so bad that moment until a few
seconds later and this was about 45
seconds the longest in my life dropping
at the speed of 200 kilometers an hour
so it off on 13,000 feet to 8,000 feet
45 seconds which was the longest for me
and then I hear the pole and my
instructor pulls the parachute straight
and that string opens out to a beautiful
red parachute horizon from that light
clouds above it was so beautiful that I
just forgotten about the last 45 seconds
that ride for 45 seconds I just couldn’t
believe what I was looking in front of
me and this whole experience taught me
one thing whenever I look bad
said I have a choice I can carry that
fear as a black parachute bag on the
back which is always going to be me
there with a red danger sign or I could
just pull the string and just watch what
happens and release that fear and see
way that fear takes me to the heights
that I never imagined and that’s when I
kind of associated this beautiful
emotional fear with freedom with
exercise so that when anything that
comes my way and I get into this
anticipate refuel I know I have the
strength with me and I could pull that
string leads me to a happier or fulfill
itself so that leave with you today is
three beautiful points what is embrace
fear it’s just one part of the motion
you are a lot more whenever you choose
you can pull the string the second is
accept who you are then only your flaws
and the last one is overcoming fear is
your own growth with your own personal
growth and your professional growth and
emotional growth and that leads you to
love happiness and thank you it was a
pleasure pulling my glossophobia swing in front of you
me introduce myself my name is Sandra
Cole Hondo and I have lots of phobia now
before I can share what grossest phobias
all about let me ask you how many of you
a telephone BIA what a fancy name it’s a
fear of being imperfect or having a lot
of imperfections yeah you have I didn’t
know a that fancy terms for my phobia
yeah what about your phobia
have you heard some began you don’t be
so happy some things bad doesn’t happen
mm-hmm that’s a phobia we’ve all been
very familiar with this one
what about the next one which is
Anthropy phobia I know have this in
school the fear of being judged
specially managed to go up and present I
tell you my examples of my y1 okay how
yeah I I did that a lot and as my
parents found out I was pretending and
if I know one there was a fancy name to
it there probably did die as the mean
your phobia I think I’m still trying to
figure this one out it’s the fear of
going to school so why were you talking
about fears and phobias with all of you
what makes me qualified enough to talk
about it here it’s because majority of
my life
I allowed fear to learn me and restrict
my growth and I didn’t find who I was
until they came a time where I said you
know that’s it I’ve had enough I need to
find who I am behind all these fears and
the next two phobias are my personal
conquest its acrophobia fear of heights
and closer phobia fear of public
speaking I had them for many many years
taking care of them very deeply until I
decided to break them and do things that
I would never never have dreamt of to
overcome these two phobias and the next
couple of minutes I’d like to share with
you how I attempted to both of these two
phobias one of them you’re experiencing
here and now standing up in front of you
and it’s it’s quite interesting when you
talk about phobias for me it all started
with let me understand what fear is all
about because as I make people and and I
thought walking a lot people have a life
coach and the nice everyone has fears
and Sonja’s not realizing inevitable you
just cannot escape it
so let’s so I thought let’s figure this
demon out let’s understand where he’s
coming from and the more he studied and
researched and did a lot of personal
experiments I actually do realize the
great thing to have a number one it’s a
natural biological process you cannot
not have here will always have here it
is ingrained in us if we did not have
here our species would never have
survived millions of the Earth’s so
feared actually helped us come a long
long way it is there to protect us so
that we continue to survive in this
world and let’s understand a little bit
more about what fit so the Oxford
Dictionary calls fear
a very strong emotion that is caused by
an anticipation awareness of danger and
it is day to immediately protect you
from from huh
but how does it work in ayodhya process
we have this clever thing going to the
brain the brain is the one that concerns
a lot of fears some of them are really
valid and some of them are meda so let’s
let’s talk about the valid ones and get
them aside and we know what that is all
about so how it works is when you come
across a stressful stimuli which could
be a snake it could be a clown on your
head or in my case it could be an
audience we can learn to speak the body
starts reacting and developing chemicals
to take care of this fear which would be
in the form of your muscles tightening
you heart beating faster your arms ready
your breath would really shallow because
your body is getting ready to fight or
flight this is what typically you’d done
oh yeah an almost even ancestors would
have done is when you see danger your
body gets ready to run away or fight it
and that’s how the brain is developed so
if you see this I’ve got a picture
premium-grade so if you see when our
sensory organs take an information that
is your eye skin touch takes an
information it states this information
dealer to a brief particle thalamus
that’s the center that collects this
information and decides we need to set
the separation – so thalamus sends two
signals the fastest shortest route goes
to the amygdala which is the brains
threat center it designed it is a threat
and I need to protect this being from
being frightened and so what happens is
it starts getting you for your body or
main sometimes we don’t even know where
not even aware that we had a threat and
we are responding to feel like there’s
this loud song at the front door and
forget think who’s at the front door you
already prepared yeah oh yeah oh just
your body’s trembling oh you just
shocked what’s happening and you’re
ready to just run to see what’s
happening that the automatic syndrome
that was and then it goes to your point
funder brought to context the second set
up which is the new brain which is the
analytical thinking brain that actually
figures out whether the sound is a real
threat a threat to survival and then I
need to find a flight or it is actually
not a threat to survival it’s a fear
that that’s just come on you so what
happens is once you realize that this
fear is a threat is not a trigger
survival is a trick to overcoming this
fear because fear can be imagined and
that imagination can be taken as real in
your brain so for us it gets very
important to understand what fear is all
about and for me it took a process of
really understanding which aspect is
thus taking care of once the fear of
danger is taken care of then I need to
figure out where this is coming from and
during my research I realize there are
two sources where these fears come from
the first source lives in the past
it comes from past experiences it comes
from experience and again you point your
hands if you’ve gone through a trauma
you’ve had an accident you’ve gone
through an experience that is ready to a
belief of fear and that takes a little
longer process to get over that fear
what scientists believe is fear releases
stress hormones that strain
memories in you and these memories are
not flashback memories and so whenever
you need to recall a painful incident
it’s really fast because it kind of
strengthens it if I asked you what you
had for lunch day before yesterday would
you remember now but if I asked you to
share a painful experience or a memory
you’ll be surprised to find out my
nudist details you remember that what
happened years ago that’s how it works
in terms of strengthens memory but the
first step to overcoming this fear is
releasing that memory from the emotion
and this process is known as
conditioning there are fear conditioning
that’s happening that’s extinction
conditioning so let me just explain that
and this is one classic example happened
I don’t know whether you’ve read about
there’s a classic example of fear
conditioning that was taught by dr.
Watson with a child called little Albert
what had happened was the child was not
afraid of white rats but whenever that
white rat was paid with a loud scary
sound for repeatedly the child started
developing a fear of white light so much
so every time a white light appeared you
just get a book and that fear extended
to all white fuzzy objects that is how
you develop a fear conditioning and to
break that which you all are looking
towards is you just the opposite you
bear a stressful incident with something
that’s more calming and neutral for
example how many of you been attacked or
bitten by a dog quite a few ready so and
another this experience a lot of my
daughter’s children would come home and
they’ve been
that really scared the bed at all so
when somebody’s been attacked by a dog
they develop a negative experience
around dogs they mean that they may
develop a lasting fear of dogs and that
can be removed from a long process by
conditioning and exposing them to very
gently loving dogs just the opposite of
what they’ve been attacked and the more
time they spend with loving dogs they’re
able to disassociate than a negative
experience with the dog and that is how
you start removing or thinking the fear
conditioning in somebody now I want to
move to some of my fears which I
experienced a lot which is undisputed
here and the space feels basically
there’s no fear you’ll never experienced
it but you love to eating it in your
mind so any new or challenging
situations you think works in the cycle
of creating anxiety within you and that
anxiety leads to panic and panic creates
a lot of negative thoughts about the
situation if you remember you if you get
into any new situation you realize that
you just get so many negative well about
the situation of everything that could
go wrong it kind of paralyzes you it
stops you from taking that job that you
want to do and that’s where the whole
work happens and stopping this village
process in taking that stand and for me
mostly both my phobias were related to
an aspen tree for a period I started
with first working on myself and
understanding what is the data I have to
work on the belief that I have do I have
a past experience that I’ve done where I
made a fool of myself public speaking
no do I have any data that will prove
that I’m not going to be good at public
speaking
No so what stops me from starting off
small so in my close of phobia I started
taking a very small step which was in my
comfort zone
starting with speaking
my life we’ve been studying speaking to
my team colleagues my friends and then
expanding that little comic relief’s to
their senior levels an organization’s
good neighbors and then finally opening
a company that only does corporate
training doing that day-in day-out else
and then eventually come to a public
forum in speed there was a big step that
took one ladder at a time to reach the
aspiration of overcoming this public
fear the other fear is a little more
complicated which is my fear of heights
and that is something I said you know
I’m going to take a surgical step
towards it I’m gonna do something that
at one gram able to overcome it and I
said what is the highest place I can go
and dig up this fear and the highest
things that I think of was jumping off a
flight up okay so my first step was let
me must prepare myself maybe read a lot
about it research what is the safest
place for me to do a tandem skydive zero
that on a per the safest place on earth
to jump from I’ve done a lot of research
so that a lot of motivating stuff of
people who have gone through the jump
and how that’s affected me I thought my
support systems as well I got my husband
and my aunt to actually get into the
plane with me so that over they have a
panic I have them around me and then
instead of the plane all excited ready
to jump after all of my bases covered
and it’s gonna be a beautiful experience
until in front of me I see a guy sitting
with a parachute with a big red message
saying danger and on that parachute that
was enough for me to trigger all my fear
signals I was so scared that I had made
the worst decision in my life because
that had triggered Miami
automatic response suddenly I realized I
was buckled up it was all loose and I
would have fallen died outside the sky
it just seemed like a bed trap it didn’t
seem like a beautiful sky anymore and it
all just happened a couple of seconds
and I was leading the end and my jumper
said on the count of three we jump nice
no no no my eyes most dreadful
experience ever
I’m not going to see success one two and
he jumps at the count of two but there’s
no three and as soon as we jumped I
thought I was gonna die because what
happens when your mapping data triggers
your heart starts beating faster you
start getting nervous your body soil
Titans were forgotten instructions he’s
told me with my hands and I’m all
nervous and really really asked and what
do you need at 13,000 feet you need
oxygen and you can also do it by being
breathing slowly and deeply so that time
my thought was I don’t think I’m gonna
even make it on the ground I’m just
going to die of lack of oxygen because
that was so bad that moment until a few
seconds later and this was about 45
seconds the longest in my life dropping
at the speed of 200 kilometers an hour
so it off on 13,000 feet to 8,000 feet
45 seconds which was the longest for me
and then I hear the pole and my
instructor pulls the parachute straight
and that string opens out to a beautiful
red parachute horizon from that light
clouds above it was so beautiful that I
just forgotten about the last 45 seconds
that ride for 45 seconds I just couldn’t
believe what I was looking in front of
me and this whole experience taught me
one thing whenever I look bad
said I have a choice I can carry that
fear as a black parachute bag on the
back which is always going to be me
there with a red danger sign or I could
just pull the string and just watch what
happens and release that fear and see
way that fear takes me to the heights
that I never imagined and that’s when I
kind of associated this beautiful
emotional fear with freedom with
exercise so that when anything that
comes my way and I get into this
anticipate refuel I know I have the
strength with me and I could pull that
string leads me to a happier or fulfill
itself so that leave with you today is
three beautiful points what is embrace
fear it’s just one part of the motion
you are a lot more whenever you choose
you can pull the string the second is
accept who you are then only your flaws
and the last one is overcoming fear is
your own growth with your own personal
growth and your professional growth and
emotional growth and that leads you to
love happiness and thank you it was a
pleasure pulling my glossophobia swing in front of you
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