hello hi everybody again yes I’m happy
to be here and just to mention that when
I look around this room I’m convinced
beyond reasonable doubt that at least
one in every three people with a net
with what I’m about to speak on
statistics from the World Health
Organization indicates that one out of
every three women in this world have
faced sexual harassment how many of us
have faced sexual harassment don’t
answer
oh my somebody actually said yes but
that’s not an everyday scenario where
somebody will say oh my I have actually
faced sexual harassment that is not our
everyday story and when you look at the
genesis of sexual harassment it can come
from an intimate partner or an an
intimate person in your life today when
we read books and analyze predisposing
factors to sexual harassment we think
about many things especially in our
Kenyan and African scenario I was just
checking randomly at various kinds of
literature predisposing factors low
levels of education poverty mental
illness there it seems like you have to
have something wrong with you there has
to be a problem for you to face sexual
harassment but that’s in literature the
reality is anybody can face sexual
harassment and they can face it from
anybody so every one of us whether you
raise your hand read not raise your hand
whether you’re a man or where you are a
woman you can first sexual harassment
and it is nothing to be embarrassed
about
because you cannot afford to be
embarrassed about something you had no
control over and in our setting
it is difficult for people to speak up
and say that I have faced sexual
harassment because of the myths that
come with it the myths include you must
be very weak especially if you’re a
woman you must be weak for you to face
sexual harassment couldn’t you stand up
for yourself if we could all be we stand
up for ourselves then one out of every
three women would be facing harassment
right another myth that comes with it
you brought this to yourself
we know her that’s how she dresses what
else did you expect
didn’t you all know that one day she was
going to face this that is a myth that
we brought it to ourselves another thing
that happens when an individual faces
sexual harassment people fear about the
repercussions of speaking about it they
fear that it may cause the prejudice
especially for women and I want to say
especially for women in male-dominated
communities and in male-dominated spaces
the first fear is I will be segregated
more if I speak and say that I have been
sexually violated there is also this
notion that when we talk about sexual
violation we are talking about
penetrative sexual experiences that is
not the case and that is what comes to
people’s minds oh we are so sorry so
what happened how did you deal about it
some people don’t want to talk about it
because talking about sexual experiences
is a taboo but when you look at the
whole arena of sexual harassment it goes
beyond physical intimidation and
irrespective of the kind of sexual
it has a psychological or a physical
effect a negative effect on them nobody
ever went through any experience of
sexual harassment and came out strongly
celebrating simply because of the
experience it takes an extra mile
something more to be able to speak about
it to be able to acknowledge that you
cannot allow this to go on without that
you will suffer negative consequences I
want to tell you about my own story I am
a woman whom by all standards has broken
the glass ceiling at my age worked in a
male-dominated space I have broken the
glass ceiling based on any standards of
a young woman who grew up in the
circumstances that I have grown up in I
am the woman champion I am the woman
boss I am the woman leader I am the
woman hero that doesn’t make me special
that doesn’t protect me from the kinds
of violations that I face and as a woman
in leadership being an empowered woman
understanding the dynamics that women go
through in different spaces I am the
champion to stand up for other women but
as the woman boss who stands up for me
and if I am going to stand out and say I
am going through some form of sexual
harassment
what hope am i living for the people who
look up to me am i living them powerful
or helpless in most cases they feel weak
I break their spirit I make it and
consciously look like a woman at this
level will go through that yet it is not
all women who will go through it yet no
woman is immune to this just because
you’re breaking the glass ceilings in
your community in your industry in your
family in your space
nobody is too special not so undergo
harassment others look at me and say she
is empowered enough she is always
challenging the status quo she confronts
issues as they come
who would harass her who would even
think about it but that doesn’t make me
any special I am a woman like any other
I also contribute to the one out of
every three women who face different
forms of sexual harassment
in their day-to-day life and I too am
affected psychologically by the things
that I face I want to give scenarios
that demonstrate what I am talking about
about four years ago I was given an
assignment with a male colleague we were
both holding the same leadership
positions and our boss gave us an
assignment and it needed to be done
being the woman that I am who needs
tests to be done I gave him a call and
said hello when I was starting on our
task well he said come to my office we
can discuss about this and agree that
sounds right is there anything wrong up
to there in any case he was either to
come to my office or I come to my or I
go to his office and in this case he has
made a good suggestion I made the first
move he has invited me to his office
when I went to his office I stretched my
hand to greet him and he told me move
closer we need to discuss this
yeah I see a lot of you turning your
heads down they didn’t tell you they
told me we were just the two of us I
didn’t know what to say that was very
embarrassing it was very insulting this
was a professional task and the only
part of my body that hears are my ears
the rest of the body parts cannot hear
anything no matter how you feel them are
we together and I did not know what to
do then I sat back and I thought what is
more important to me right now is it’s
finishing the task or claiming my space
my power my voice and standing up for
that which I thought I needed to stand
up for and I told him we will continue
this discussion later a few weeks later
our boss called us and asked us how far
we had gone with the assignment and my
male colleague answered very fast and he
said we are working on the assignment
and I jumped in I said no we are not
working on the assignment because the
last time we were supposed to work this
is exactly what he told me and I felt
offended and the same way you looked
down when I saved the words that he
wanted to feel my body he’s the same way
everybody looked down how can you say
that how can you embarrass a male
colleague how can you speak about such
things in front of other dignitaries
couldn’t you talk about it privately but
then I asked myself why should the issue
of my abuse be a secret when you don’t
want me to speak about it then there
must be something wrong that is just one
incident another time again Here I am
still the strong-willed woman the person
who’s setting the path making sure that
things are done not being the one who
will be the team member
that lets every other person down we
have an assignment to do again with a
different colleague and this time we
start communicating and he says you know
what you focus so much on work that you
forget about your own personal happiness
but I said hello I haven’t mentioned to
anybody that I am NOT happy so what
makes somebody think that I am not happy
and he said we need to learn to relate
beyond our workspaces it adds a lot of
value when we can engage more and I
asked him what exactly do you mean he
said we need to have a secret
relationship a relationship that can
make the two of us happy and we were
communicating honest on SMS and I said
anything that is supposed to be a secret
is not worth keeping I have too big a
mouth to use I mean if I’m not going to
speak about this Who am I going to speak
about I want to have been a relationship
I can speak about okay you know what he
did he served his number my number with
his name on the phone and it appeared as
if I was the one requesting for the
relationship and he was telling me he
was not comfortable with a secret
relationship and he took a screenshot
and send it to other people what is that
supposed to be that is fast
you are intrusive secondly you try and
gender shame me and you know how the
world goes we knew it that’s how she
gets into the offices she does that’s
how she gets opportunities why because
I’m a woman what is that supposed to
mean what is that supposed to do it is
supposed to silence me to make me feel
embarrassed about ever speaking about
sexual harassment it
supposed to make me look so bad that the
next time I even tried to defend
somebody I will look like I’m simply
defending and disciple I have recruited
and that’s not the case the reality is
somebody intruded my space they feel
uncomfortable with my approach or my
feedback to them and therefore they
would like us to go through the same
things so that the whole world turns
against me and I look like the bad one
so that I can lose credibility and
legitimacy to ever speak about any form
of sexual harassment that I encounter or
any other person encounters I repeat
what I in Sade initially that when
people harass you sexually
it doesn’t need to involve any physical
encounter it is the personal space they
invade and the feelings they live in you
feelings that have the capacity to make
or to break you I have been a victim of
social media and gender shaming
where individuals I have never met I
don’t even know whether they are real
individuals or those are ghost accounts
have spoken very nasty sexual things
about me
including speaking about personal
experiences with me yet I don’t even
know them and I want to say that nobody
can be safe when it comes to sexual
harassment I know myself and people who
know me will tell you she is a strong
person she will manage but I want to
tell you my own personal experiences
that all these things I have talked
about and this are just a tip of the
iceberg are things that broke my heart
they made me question my own self
how am i presenting myself what kind of
communication am i sending out there is
there something wrong I am doing that is
being misunderstood I even asked myself
at one point isn’t there any other value
that anybody can see in me
apart from sexual related aspects it has
a way of draining one self-esteem
irrespective of where you are in life
and the challenge here is simple when
you are the woman in leadership you are
everybody’s champion you are the boss at
work you are the big sister you are the
person mentoring every other girl around
you so whom are you turning to where are
you complaining sometimes even the
places you need to complain to you have
greater power than them so where are you
complaining does that mean you will
ignore it last year when the me2
campaign started I resonated with it
especially when I saw quite a number of
people asking very strange questions
aha so you’re opening up now where have
you been all these years why haven’t you
spoken about it here is the truth is
there a right time to speak about sexual
harassment the answer is there is really
no right time every time is the right
time every time is the right time to
speak about sexual harassment and then
people said why have you been quiet all
these years and I could resonate with
what a lot of women had gone through
either consciously or unconsciously for
the longest time possible you feel you
are not sure
whether it is the right thing to do you
think about the repercussions to all the
people around you and to your own self
I once encounter the man just I was
having sitting at having a drink with a
male friend and somebody I know passed I
don’t know whether that was a joke or it
was just one of those deliberate random
statements he told my male friend ha
please take care as you have your drink
you may easily be charged for crimes for
sexual crimes you have not committed I
mean just because I stood up once or
twice to say something doesn’t mean that
every other man I am seen with the risks
being reported I mean you will not be
reported if you haven’t done anything I
will not complain if you are not
offensive and what did I do
I thought that was the woman champion as
the woman leader as that person who’s
still planning to saw her until I become
the president of this world I must
continue to speak because this kind of
violations are not going to stop I also
realized one very precious thing that I
must not be afraid to reach out to
people to hold my hand and help me speak
against these things just because the
rest of the world thinks hello can it
really happen to her that is not a
reservation for me so throughout my life
I decided to also look for male
advocates who can stand up and defend
women who can communicate to other men
and make them feel and understand how we
women feel when we are exposed to
certain scenarios I looked at it and I
said there are many women whose growth
will be curtailed because they are
afraid to speak and unless women like
mister
speaking about these things nothing much
is going to change so when we hear about
me too I say me too I have been in that
scenario and I want you to say me too
I want to be counted as an individual
who was able to prevent any form of
sexual harassment to a woman
irrespective of where she stands let us
not forget that one out of three women
in this whole world faced sexual
harassment whether it is through
somebody they know somebody they do not
know or it is physical or non-physical
and irrespective of the kind of violence
they face it has a potential of
curtailing their personal growth and
when a woman’s personal growth is
curtailed the growth of the community is
also curtailed in one way or another so
this morning I urge each one of you join
me let it be you – me – you – and let it
be all of us speaking up to protect
women against all forms of sexual
violence irrespective of how they occur
thank you very much [Applause]
to be here and just to mention that when
I look around this room I’m convinced
beyond reasonable doubt that at least
one in every three people with a net
with what I’m about to speak on
statistics from the World Health
Organization indicates that one out of
every three women in this world have
faced sexual harassment how many of us
have faced sexual harassment don’t
answer
oh my somebody actually said yes but
that’s not an everyday scenario where
somebody will say oh my I have actually
faced sexual harassment that is not our
everyday story and when you look at the
genesis of sexual harassment it can come
from an intimate partner or an an
intimate person in your life today when
we read books and analyze predisposing
factors to sexual harassment we think
about many things especially in our
Kenyan and African scenario I was just
checking randomly at various kinds of
literature predisposing factors low
levels of education poverty mental
illness there it seems like you have to
have something wrong with you there has
to be a problem for you to face sexual
harassment but that’s in literature the
reality is anybody can face sexual
harassment and they can face it from
anybody so every one of us whether you
raise your hand read not raise your hand
whether you’re a man or where you are a
woman you can first sexual harassment
and it is nothing to be embarrassed
about
because you cannot afford to be
embarrassed about something you had no
control over and in our setting
it is difficult for people to speak up
and say that I have faced sexual
harassment because of the myths that
come with it the myths include you must
be very weak especially if you’re a
woman you must be weak for you to face
sexual harassment couldn’t you stand up
for yourself if we could all be we stand
up for ourselves then one out of every
three women would be facing harassment
right another myth that comes with it
you brought this to yourself
we know her that’s how she dresses what
else did you expect
didn’t you all know that one day she was
going to face this that is a myth that
we brought it to ourselves another thing
that happens when an individual faces
sexual harassment people fear about the
repercussions of speaking about it they
fear that it may cause the prejudice
especially for women and I want to say
especially for women in male-dominated
communities and in male-dominated spaces
the first fear is I will be segregated
more if I speak and say that I have been
sexually violated there is also this
notion that when we talk about sexual
violation we are talking about
penetrative sexual experiences that is
not the case and that is what comes to
people’s minds oh we are so sorry so
what happened how did you deal about it
some people don’t want to talk about it
because talking about sexual experiences
is a taboo but when you look at the
whole arena of sexual harassment it goes
beyond physical intimidation and
irrespective of the kind of sexual
it has a psychological or a physical
effect a negative effect on them nobody
ever went through any experience of
sexual harassment and came out strongly
celebrating simply because of the
experience it takes an extra mile
something more to be able to speak about
it to be able to acknowledge that you
cannot allow this to go on without that
you will suffer negative consequences I
want to tell you about my own story I am
a woman whom by all standards has broken
the glass ceiling at my age worked in a
male-dominated space I have broken the
glass ceiling based on any standards of
a young woman who grew up in the
circumstances that I have grown up in I
am the woman champion I am the woman
boss I am the woman leader I am the
woman hero that doesn’t make me special
that doesn’t protect me from the kinds
of violations that I face and as a woman
in leadership being an empowered woman
understanding the dynamics that women go
through in different spaces I am the
champion to stand up for other women but
as the woman boss who stands up for me
and if I am going to stand out and say I
am going through some form of sexual
harassment
what hope am i living for the people who
look up to me am i living them powerful
or helpless in most cases they feel weak
I break their spirit I make it and
consciously look like a woman at this
level will go through that yet it is not
all women who will go through it yet no
woman is immune to this just because
you’re breaking the glass ceilings in
your community in your industry in your
family in your space
nobody is too special not so undergo
harassment others look at me and say she
is empowered enough she is always
challenging the status quo she confronts
issues as they come
who would harass her who would even
think about it but that doesn’t make me
any special I am a woman like any other
I also contribute to the one out of
every three women who face different
forms of sexual harassment
in their day-to-day life and I too am
affected psychologically by the things
that I face I want to give scenarios
that demonstrate what I am talking about
about four years ago I was given an
assignment with a male colleague we were
both holding the same leadership
positions and our boss gave us an
assignment and it needed to be done
being the woman that I am who needs
tests to be done I gave him a call and
said hello when I was starting on our
task well he said come to my office we
can discuss about this and agree that
sounds right is there anything wrong up
to there in any case he was either to
come to my office or I come to my or I
go to his office and in this case he has
made a good suggestion I made the first
move he has invited me to his office
when I went to his office I stretched my
hand to greet him and he told me move
closer we need to discuss this
yeah I see a lot of you turning your
heads down they didn’t tell you they
told me we were just the two of us I
didn’t know what to say that was very
embarrassing it was very insulting this
was a professional task and the only
part of my body that hears are my ears
the rest of the body parts cannot hear
anything no matter how you feel them are
we together and I did not know what to
do then I sat back and I thought what is
more important to me right now is it’s
finishing the task or claiming my space
my power my voice and standing up for
that which I thought I needed to stand
up for and I told him we will continue
this discussion later a few weeks later
our boss called us and asked us how far
we had gone with the assignment and my
male colleague answered very fast and he
said we are working on the assignment
and I jumped in I said no we are not
working on the assignment because the
last time we were supposed to work this
is exactly what he told me and I felt
offended and the same way you looked
down when I saved the words that he
wanted to feel my body he’s the same way
everybody looked down how can you say
that how can you embarrass a male
colleague how can you speak about such
things in front of other dignitaries
couldn’t you talk about it privately but
then I asked myself why should the issue
of my abuse be a secret when you don’t
want me to speak about it then there
must be something wrong that is just one
incident another time again Here I am
still the strong-willed woman the person
who’s setting the path making sure that
things are done not being the one who
will be the team member
that lets every other person down we
have an assignment to do again with a
different colleague and this time we
start communicating and he says you know
what you focus so much on work that you
forget about your own personal happiness
but I said hello I haven’t mentioned to
anybody that I am NOT happy so what
makes somebody think that I am not happy
and he said we need to learn to relate
beyond our workspaces it adds a lot of
value when we can engage more and I
asked him what exactly do you mean he
said we need to have a secret
relationship a relationship that can
make the two of us happy and we were
communicating honest on SMS and I said
anything that is supposed to be a secret
is not worth keeping I have too big a
mouth to use I mean if I’m not going to
speak about this Who am I going to speak
about I want to have been a relationship
I can speak about okay you know what he
did he served his number my number with
his name on the phone and it appeared as
if I was the one requesting for the
relationship and he was telling me he
was not comfortable with a secret
relationship and he took a screenshot
and send it to other people what is that
supposed to be that is fast
you are intrusive secondly you try and
gender shame me and you know how the
world goes we knew it that’s how she
gets into the offices she does that’s
how she gets opportunities why because
I’m a woman what is that supposed to
mean what is that supposed to do it is
supposed to silence me to make me feel
embarrassed about ever speaking about
sexual harassment it
supposed to make me look so bad that the
next time I even tried to defend
somebody I will look like I’m simply
defending and disciple I have recruited
and that’s not the case the reality is
somebody intruded my space they feel
uncomfortable with my approach or my
feedback to them and therefore they
would like us to go through the same
things so that the whole world turns
against me and I look like the bad one
so that I can lose credibility and
legitimacy to ever speak about any form
of sexual harassment that I encounter or
any other person encounters I repeat
what I in Sade initially that when
people harass you sexually
it doesn’t need to involve any physical
encounter it is the personal space they
invade and the feelings they live in you
feelings that have the capacity to make
or to break you I have been a victim of
social media and gender shaming
where individuals I have never met I
don’t even know whether they are real
individuals or those are ghost accounts
have spoken very nasty sexual things
about me
including speaking about personal
experiences with me yet I don’t even
know them and I want to say that nobody
can be safe when it comes to sexual
harassment I know myself and people who
know me will tell you she is a strong
person she will manage but I want to
tell you my own personal experiences
that all these things I have talked
about and this are just a tip of the
iceberg are things that broke my heart
they made me question my own self
how am i presenting myself what kind of
communication am i sending out there is
there something wrong I am doing that is
being misunderstood I even asked myself
at one point isn’t there any other value
that anybody can see in me
apart from sexual related aspects it has
a way of draining one self-esteem
irrespective of where you are in life
and the challenge here is simple when
you are the woman in leadership you are
everybody’s champion you are the boss at
work you are the big sister you are the
person mentoring every other girl around
you so whom are you turning to where are
you complaining sometimes even the
places you need to complain to you have
greater power than them so where are you
complaining does that mean you will
ignore it last year when the me2
campaign started I resonated with it
especially when I saw quite a number of
people asking very strange questions
aha so you’re opening up now where have
you been all these years why haven’t you
spoken about it here is the truth is
there a right time to speak about sexual
harassment the answer is there is really
no right time every time is the right
time every time is the right time to
speak about sexual harassment and then
people said why have you been quiet all
these years and I could resonate with
what a lot of women had gone through
either consciously or unconsciously for
the longest time possible you feel you
are not sure
whether it is the right thing to do you
think about the repercussions to all the
people around you and to your own self
I once encounter the man just I was
having sitting at having a drink with a
male friend and somebody I know passed I
don’t know whether that was a joke or it
was just one of those deliberate random
statements he told my male friend ha
please take care as you have your drink
you may easily be charged for crimes for
sexual crimes you have not committed I
mean just because I stood up once or
twice to say something doesn’t mean that
every other man I am seen with the risks
being reported I mean you will not be
reported if you haven’t done anything I
will not complain if you are not
offensive and what did I do
I thought that was the woman champion as
the woman leader as that person who’s
still planning to saw her until I become
the president of this world I must
continue to speak because this kind of
violations are not going to stop I also
realized one very precious thing that I
must not be afraid to reach out to
people to hold my hand and help me speak
against these things just because the
rest of the world thinks hello can it
really happen to her that is not a
reservation for me so throughout my life
I decided to also look for male
advocates who can stand up and defend
women who can communicate to other men
and make them feel and understand how we
women feel when we are exposed to
certain scenarios I looked at it and I
said there are many women whose growth
will be curtailed because they are
afraid to speak and unless women like
mister
speaking about these things nothing much
is going to change so when we hear about
me too I say me too I have been in that
scenario and I want you to say me too
I want to be counted as an individual
who was able to prevent any form of
sexual harassment to a woman
irrespective of where she stands let us
not forget that one out of three women
in this whole world faced sexual
harassment whether it is through
somebody they know somebody they do not
know or it is physical or non-physical
and irrespective of the kind of violence
they face it has a potential of
curtailing their personal growth and
when a woman’s personal growth is
curtailed the growth of the community is
also curtailed in one way or another so
this morning I urge each one of you join
me let it be you – me – you – and let it
be all of us speaking up to protect
women against all forms of sexual
violence irrespective of how they occur
thank you very much [Applause]
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