stop this thing okay how many of you
guys have heard of that before
yeah this isn’t a rhetorical question
right so raise your hand if you’ve heard
about the stigma when they talk about
homosexuality
now how about when we talk about mental
illness now what about when we talk
about gender racial and religious and
equality now how many of you have heard
of stop the stigma when we talk about
talking to other people
so our first test I was really weird cuz
who has a stigma against these other
people mister answer everyone in Western
society it seems sort of as a faux pas
to walk up to someone and start a
conversation but this isn’t the case
everywhere in the world on a family trip
to China we were to lie did to know we
had our own personal paparazzi
everywhere we went the people of 1000
would wave their phones Alice trying to
take a picture with us before we moved
on to our next spot and that was really
cool we’ve never felt so pampered am i
whole but that doesn’t happen in Western
society you don’t walk up to someone say
hey can I take a selfie with you it’s
not done you guys all laugh because it’s
weird so why is that well it’s cuz
there’s a stigma against conversations
people think it’s weird and irregular to
talk to others and it should be avoided
at all costs how familiar does this
sound you see someone and you’re like oh
I’d like to be their friend but I hope
that happens without having to talk to
them you won’t even make eye contact you
just kind of hope it’ll happen and you
know it doesn’t work we all know it
doesn’t work so we why do we do it
anyway it’s because conversations are
seen as weird
this is especially prevalent in high
school which by the way is where I am
right now
I was too shy to talk to anyone in the
middle school so I blend other people
for me not having advice it was their
fault I didn’t talk to anyone it was
their fault
i sat by myself in a room full of
it was their fault that the only
conversations I did have or with my
teachers and about my grades I have the
classic blame the other person mindset
because no way was that responsibility
on me it was up to others herself and
those social circumstances so after some
lonely years in this school I mean I’m
talking to anyone I had an epiphany I
could be the one to start the
conversation I could be the one to sit
next to somebody new and make a change
in my life I could be the one to get out
of the sidelines and take charge of how
I felt when I felt it and that was
amazing I did it I broke through that
stigma that conversations are weird and
I sat next to someone our conversation
was very brief with minimal eye contact
what I did day after day after I did
this I realized people were excited I
was talking to them they too had been
waiting for somebody else to start the
conversation they too were feeling like
they were put on the sidelines and
wanted somebody else to bring them out
they I realized that the stigma that
talking to others was weird but purely
in my head nobody no one was judging me
for talking to people who weren’t my
closest friends on the contrary they
were waiting for me to do so I promise
you that when you talk to others they’ll
open up and you might find yourself
having a great time with a new friend
now don’t get me wrong not everyone will
open up and not everyone has to as yet
someone who’s perfectly content sitting
in a corner observing others
conversations that’s great do what makes
you happy if there’s someone who’s so
shy that thinking about talking to
others gives you panic attacks please
realize I’m just trying to give you a
little nut out of your compass I’m not
push you off the brink of sanity no
that’s not what I’m about this is her
people like me for people who felt sick
of
on the sidelines of their own life but
felt like they needed permission from
some coats to get out there and take
charts this is for people who like me
thought that other people were in charge
of their life know if you had a
conversation with me in elementary
school this is probably how I got though
you walked up to me and been like thank
you me
what’s your favorite color I know the
first question and I would’ve been like
oh okay you being persistent probably
would have tried to get and say hey how
many siblings do you have
your thoughts pretty weird because they
didn’t know how many siblings I’ve had
and I’ve lived with in my whole life so
I shouldn’t know but I wouldn’t open up
it would become apparent to you that I
do nothing about myself I wouldn’t tell
you what I liked I wouldn’t tell you any
my hobbies I wouldn’t tell you anything
personal and at least I was willing to
pretend like I didn’t know anything
about myself to stop from opening up and
part of that was because I felt like I
was being pitied
I felt like others were talking to me
just to me and I hated and after I
started talks with the others I realized
that yes conversations are incredibly
nice it’s nice to have a conversation
with someone new but that’s not the only
reason people talk to each other it’s
human nature to be curious about those
around us it’s human nature to want to
know more about our environment because
it’s survival instinct and since we
surround ourselves with hundreds of
people each day naturally that includes
knowing more about each other we need to
feed each other’s curiosity so we can
learn more about each other and be
happier people have you ever been
somewhere where the atmosphere did kind
of like this room right now
yeah do you know how much that
is this is me every time I walk into
chemistry and it’s not just the class is
hard or the people are hostile heavens
know that people are nice it’s because
nobody’s talking to each other
there is no conversations going on
whatsoever so I walk in so one time
trying to break the ice this is like
halfway through the semester and having
a terrible joke I’m like Oh guys like
everybody died cuz that’s how it felt
and you know what response I got nothing
nobody looked up no one looked down at
me though it sneezed
like it would have been modern and the
kids on that room had been outside of
the room I stand for that it was the
white was that it was because no one was
talking to each other no one was
communicating I promise you that when
you talk to others a community is built
and there’s an atmosphere we enjoy to be
in when we talk to others ideas are
shared and experiences are spread that
he just something that others could not
you are an individual you have something
important to say I have a firm believer
that everybody has something to say so
the next time somebody asks you hey
what’s up don’t respond with nothing
because that is not true
you have something important and you are
the only one who can teach it a
community is not something we can
possibly ignore and hope it’ll grow into
something that’s okay it’s something
that we need to nurture by nurturing
each other it’s something that we need
to take part of and talk to one another
when you talk to each other
you feel good you feel good about who
you are because others are listening
let’s stop passively ignoring each other
and build something beautiful with our dialogues
guys have heard of that before
yeah this isn’t a rhetorical question
right so raise your hand if you’ve heard
about the stigma when they talk about
homosexuality
now how about when we talk about mental
illness now what about when we talk
about gender racial and religious and
equality now how many of you have heard
of stop the stigma when we talk about
talking to other people
so our first test I was really weird cuz
who has a stigma against these other
people mister answer everyone in Western
society it seems sort of as a faux pas
to walk up to someone and start a
conversation but this isn’t the case
everywhere in the world on a family trip
to China we were to lie did to know we
had our own personal paparazzi
everywhere we went the people of 1000
would wave their phones Alice trying to
take a picture with us before we moved
on to our next spot and that was really
cool we’ve never felt so pampered am i
whole but that doesn’t happen in Western
society you don’t walk up to someone say
hey can I take a selfie with you it’s
not done you guys all laugh because it’s
weird so why is that well it’s cuz
there’s a stigma against conversations
people think it’s weird and irregular to
talk to others and it should be avoided
at all costs how familiar does this
sound you see someone and you’re like oh
I’d like to be their friend but I hope
that happens without having to talk to
them you won’t even make eye contact you
just kind of hope it’ll happen and you
know it doesn’t work we all know it
doesn’t work so we why do we do it
anyway it’s because conversations are
seen as weird
this is especially prevalent in high
school which by the way is where I am
right now
I was too shy to talk to anyone in the
middle school so I blend other people
for me not having advice it was their
fault I didn’t talk to anyone it was
their fault
i sat by myself in a room full of
it was their fault that the only
conversations I did have or with my
teachers and about my grades I have the
classic blame the other person mindset
because no way was that responsibility
on me it was up to others herself and
those social circumstances so after some
lonely years in this school I mean I’m
talking to anyone I had an epiphany I
could be the one to start the
conversation I could be the one to sit
next to somebody new and make a change
in my life I could be the one to get out
of the sidelines and take charge of how
I felt when I felt it and that was
amazing I did it I broke through that
stigma that conversations are weird and
I sat next to someone our conversation
was very brief with minimal eye contact
what I did day after day after I did
this I realized people were excited I
was talking to them they too had been
waiting for somebody else to start the
conversation they too were feeling like
they were put on the sidelines and
wanted somebody else to bring them out
they I realized that the stigma that
talking to others was weird but purely
in my head nobody no one was judging me
for talking to people who weren’t my
closest friends on the contrary they
were waiting for me to do so I promise
you that when you talk to others they’ll
open up and you might find yourself
having a great time with a new friend
now don’t get me wrong not everyone will
open up and not everyone has to as yet
someone who’s perfectly content sitting
in a corner observing others
conversations that’s great do what makes
you happy if there’s someone who’s so
shy that thinking about talking to
others gives you panic attacks please
realize I’m just trying to give you a
little nut out of your compass I’m not
push you off the brink of sanity no
that’s not what I’m about this is her
people like me for people who felt sick
of
on the sidelines of their own life but
felt like they needed permission from
some coats to get out there and take
charts this is for people who like me
thought that other people were in charge
of their life know if you had a
conversation with me in elementary
school this is probably how I got though
you walked up to me and been like thank
you me
what’s your favorite color I know the
first question and I would’ve been like
oh okay you being persistent probably
would have tried to get and say hey how
many siblings do you have
your thoughts pretty weird because they
didn’t know how many siblings I’ve had
and I’ve lived with in my whole life so
I shouldn’t know but I wouldn’t open up
it would become apparent to you that I
do nothing about myself I wouldn’t tell
you what I liked I wouldn’t tell you any
my hobbies I wouldn’t tell you anything
personal and at least I was willing to
pretend like I didn’t know anything
about myself to stop from opening up and
part of that was because I felt like I
was being pitied
I felt like others were talking to me
just to me and I hated and after I
started talks with the others I realized
that yes conversations are incredibly
nice it’s nice to have a conversation
with someone new but that’s not the only
reason people talk to each other it’s
human nature to be curious about those
around us it’s human nature to want to
know more about our environment because
it’s survival instinct and since we
surround ourselves with hundreds of
people each day naturally that includes
knowing more about each other we need to
feed each other’s curiosity so we can
learn more about each other and be
happier people have you ever been
somewhere where the atmosphere did kind
of like this room right now
yeah do you know how much that
is this is me every time I walk into
chemistry and it’s not just the class is
hard or the people are hostile heavens
know that people are nice it’s because
nobody’s talking to each other
there is no conversations going on
whatsoever so I walk in so one time
trying to break the ice this is like
halfway through the semester and having
a terrible joke I’m like Oh guys like
everybody died cuz that’s how it felt
and you know what response I got nothing
nobody looked up no one looked down at
me though it sneezed
like it would have been modern and the
kids on that room had been outside of
the room I stand for that it was the
white was that it was because no one was
talking to each other no one was
communicating I promise you that when
you talk to others a community is built
and there’s an atmosphere we enjoy to be
in when we talk to others ideas are
shared and experiences are spread that
he just something that others could not
you are an individual you have something
important to say I have a firm believer
that everybody has something to say so
the next time somebody asks you hey
what’s up don’t respond with nothing
because that is not true
you have something important and you are
the only one who can teach it a
community is not something we can
possibly ignore and hope it’ll grow into
something that’s okay it’s something
that we need to nurture by nurturing
each other it’s something that we need
to take part of and talk to one another
when you talk to each other
you feel good you feel good about who
you are because others are listening
let’s stop passively ignoring each other
and build something beautiful with our dialogues
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