[Music]
[Applause]
in the summer of 2006 my native Lebanon
was at war with our neighbor to the
south
I recall walking home from basketball
practice one evening when the roar of an
Israeli fire jet filled the air as I was
crossing one of the last remaining
bridges that connected our small town
now if you’ve never been in the presence
of a fire jet let me just say it’s an
extremely clarifying moment everything
about my world was stripped away all the
things that I thought I cared about all
the stuff that I thought I was gone in
an instant it was just me I realized my
life had been to me focused and I hadn’t
build meaningful connections I was
standing on a bridge that was about to
be destroyed yet I hadn’t built a single
bridge myself this is the message I am
sharing today it has taken me most of my
life and half of the world to put it
into these words human beings are
designed to be pro-social dr. John
Halliwell from the University of British
Columbia in Canada is credited for that
term pro-social it’s a concept that we
do things for one another beyond what is
just required for our survival
a lot of animals are social but they do
things to survive we do things to thrive
and pro-social behavior gives beauty and
meaning to our interactions and enriches
our lives dr. Halliwell concluded
communities and Nations with better
social capital in other words quality
social networks and social norms as well
as high levels of trust respond to
crisis and economic transitions
more happily and effectively our world
is in need of more of that pro-social
people in it and so I am counting on all
of you I am not merely speaking about
being proactive nor am i referencing
introverts versus extroverts that’s a
discussion for another day everyone can
choose to behave pro socially dr. hello
will and I are talking about doing
things for the pure sake of helping
other people out of genuine concern of
their well-being their thoughts their
rights our world is in desperate need of
unity and bridge-building now before I
start talking about communities we first
must focus on the individual and in
order for us to do that we have to
socially disrupt our worldview all the
boxes that we think everyone belongs in
so neatly we have to set that aside it
seems counterintuitive but we stop
viewing people as communities in order
to form our own community we start
seeing them as individuals with that
assuming we know them we construct a new
more amalgamated and blended community
when we’ve broken down those imaginary
barriers and genuinely understood the
individual the process requires three
key components to fully grasp and
understand pro-social behavior identity
legitimacy and reward I’ll start with
identity three days after my incident on
the bridge I emigrated to Houston Texas
all by myself and completely overwhelmed
by a foreign system I did not speak any
English I did not even know how to check
my mailbox but I refuse to quit and
return home I eventually ended up on the
streets of Houston an outcast from every
single community but then someone chose
to disrupt her soul
orbit and see me as an individual she
came from all the boxes I feared my
whole life to that point she was a Bible
Belt Christian woman of Jewish descent
named Andrea I saw her a threat because
I saw her for the communities I just
mentioned but again she saw me as an
individual
her family selflessly took me in as one
of their own fed and clothed me Tommy
English and helped me navigate their
culture it was a pro-social behavior
personified basically that family gave
me an identity I belonged to a family I
had an address that sense of identity
led to a sense of purpose we had a
shared vision and mission a goal those
sense of identities of ours created more
purpose second legitimacy three years
later I found myself on Oahu’s North
Shore
I was literally a world away from
Lebanon and culturally it was quite
different than the one I just left in
Texas but I learned to love it just as
much I was very much an outsider
religiously ethnically yet I was the
first Muslim student body president at a
Mormon University in Hawaii
I was able to assimilate with the
community and embrace the Polynesian
culture the Aloha spirit and the LDS
community with pro-social intentions in
every interaction I wanted to serve the
student body in the community and never
once the students faculty and staff in
Hawaii see me anything less than a
legitimate human being capable of making
good choices and contributing to their
community they respected me as a fellow
person
and they worked hard to help me
understand their culture and community
third and finally reward our ancestors
discovered the benefit of community the
strengthened numbers the protection of
social bonds they recognized like dr.
Halliwell did that we react to
opposition better and adapt more readily
when we have social capital like strong
unified communities these incentives
also drive social mobility the ability
to work hard for a better life a recent
study from Harvard University and UC
Berkeley found that despite recent
claims to the contrary social mobility
is still alive and well in our society
after analyzing the tax returns of 40
million people they discovered that a
child born at the same time I was born
in the poorest income quintile has a
nine percent chance of rising to the top
income bracket nine percent that’s a
reward and today I’m here as an
ambassador of that nine percent if you
would have asked me ten years ago as a
teenager on that bridge I would have
never thought I’ll be standing here
today but it’s possible I want that to
be 40 percent again like it was after
World War two when people worked hard to
get to the top
that number has been declining and
that’s because more communities are
swung
instead of launch pads so let me recount
humans are pro-social beings that derive
fulfillment from serving one another
disrupting our social circles to
understand and embrace individuals is
the way to form vibrant healthy
communities every community must offer
identity leading to purpose they must
defend the legitimacy of individual
rights and concerns and they must offer
a reward for those who build them given
what I have Illustrated I want us to
take a step back from the world we are
in step away from all the boxes we’ll
put people in see everyone as a brother
or sister as your brother or sister or
your mother your father or your child
how will you treat them everyone has
something to contribute because we are
all building social value in some
community we belong to some where the
social capital of any society is
directly measured by the strength of its
fundamental unit the family when a
community is successful families are
united and fulfilled just as we would
assess the health of an ecosystem like a
forest by judging the health of its
trees so too we can gauge the wealth of
society’s capital by looking at the
status of its families be that
pro-social person be that Andrea step
away from your orbit your community your
family and yourself find someone who
needs what you have and help them earn
it
introduce yourself to your neighbors if
you haven’t eat at a different
restaurant or visit a different
congregation this weekend disrupt your
orbit and hold a space for someone
amazing to enter your world I can
promise
there is no greater thrill than watching
someone climb that social ladder no
better feeling to extend the hand to
another human not because they belong to
the same community as you but because
they are worthy of your respect and now
you are a pro-social thinker today I’m
happy to say that I am proud of my
communities and I know they are proud of
me thank you
you
[Applause]
[Applause]
in the summer of 2006 my native Lebanon
was at war with our neighbor to the
south
I recall walking home from basketball
practice one evening when the roar of an
Israeli fire jet filled the air as I was
crossing one of the last remaining
bridges that connected our small town
now if you’ve never been in the presence
of a fire jet let me just say it’s an
extremely clarifying moment everything
about my world was stripped away all the
things that I thought I cared about all
the stuff that I thought I was gone in
an instant it was just me I realized my
life had been to me focused and I hadn’t
build meaningful connections I was
standing on a bridge that was about to
be destroyed yet I hadn’t built a single
bridge myself this is the message I am
sharing today it has taken me most of my
life and half of the world to put it
into these words human beings are
designed to be pro-social dr. John
Halliwell from the University of British
Columbia in Canada is credited for that
term pro-social it’s a concept that we
do things for one another beyond what is
just required for our survival
a lot of animals are social but they do
things to survive we do things to thrive
and pro-social behavior gives beauty and
meaning to our interactions and enriches
our lives dr. Halliwell concluded
communities and Nations with better
social capital in other words quality
social networks and social norms as well
as high levels of trust respond to
crisis and economic transitions
more happily and effectively our world
is in need of more of that pro-social
people in it and so I am counting on all
of you I am not merely speaking about
being proactive nor am i referencing
introverts versus extroverts that’s a
discussion for another day everyone can
choose to behave pro socially dr. hello
will and I are talking about doing
things for the pure sake of helping
other people out of genuine concern of
their well-being their thoughts their
rights our world is in desperate need of
unity and bridge-building now before I
start talking about communities we first
must focus on the individual and in
order for us to do that we have to
socially disrupt our worldview all the
boxes that we think everyone belongs in
so neatly we have to set that aside it
seems counterintuitive but we stop
viewing people as communities in order
to form our own community we start
seeing them as individuals with that
assuming we know them we construct a new
more amalgamated and blended community
when we’ve broken down those imaginary
barriers and genuinely understood the
individual the process requires three
key components to fully grasp and
understand pro-social behavior identity
legitimacy and reward I’ll start with
identity three days after my incident on
the bridge I emigrated to Houston Texas
all by myself and completely overwhelmed
by a foreign system I did not speak any
English I did not even know how to check
my mailbox but I refuse to quit and
return home I eventually ended up on the
streets of Houston an outcast from every
single community but then someone chose
to disrupt her soul
orbit and see me as an individual she
came from all the boxes I feared my
whole life to that point she was a Bible
Belt Christian woman of Jewish descent
named Andrea I saw her a threat because
I saw her for the communities I just
mentioned but again she saw me as an
individual
her family selflessly took me in as one
of their own fed and clothed me Tommy
English and helped me navigate their
culture it was a pro-social behavior
personified basically that family gave
me an identity I belonged to a family I
had an address that sense of identity
led to a sense of purpose we had a
shared vision and mission a goal those
sense of identities of ours created more
purpose second legitimacy three years
later I found myself on Oahu’s North
Shore
I was literally a world away from
Lebanon and culturally it was quite
different than the one I just left in
Texas but I learned to love it just as
much I was very much an outsider
religiously ethnically yet I was the
first Muslim student body president at a
Mormon University in Hawaii
I was able to assimilate with the
community and embrace the Polynesian
culture the Aloha spirit and the LDS
community with pro-social intentions in
every interaction I wanted to serve the
student body in the community and never
once the students faculty and staff in
Hawaii see me anything less than a
legitimate human being capable of making
good choices and contributing to their
community they respected me as a fellow
person
and they worked hard to help me
understand their culture and community
third and finally reward our ancestors
discovered the benefit of community the
strengthened numbers the protection of
social bonds they recognized like dr.
Halliwell did that we react to
opposition better and adapt more readily
when we have social capital like strong
unified communities these incentives
also drive social mobility the ability
to work hard for a better life a recent
study from Harvard University and UC
Berkeley found that despite recent
claims to the contrary social mobility
is still alive and well in our society
after analyzing the tax returns of 40
million people they discovered that a
child born at the same time I was born
in the poorest income quintile has a
nine percent chance of rising to the top
income bracket nine percent that’s a
reward and today I’m here as an
ambassador of that nine percent if you
would have asked me ten years ago as a
teenager on that bridge I would have
never thought I’ll be standing here
today but it’s possible I want that to
be 40 percent again like it was after
World War two when people worked hard to
get to the top
that number has been declining and
that’s because more communities are
swung
instead of launch pads so let me recount
humans are pro-social beings that derive
fulfillment from serving one another
disrupting our social circles to
understand and embrace individuals is
the way to form vibrant healthy
communities every community must offer
identity leading to purpose they must
defend the legitimacy of individual
rights and concerns and they must offer
a reward for those who build them given
what I have Illustrated I want us to
take a step back from the world we are
in step away from all the boxes we’ll
put people in see everyone as a brother
or sister as your brother or sister or
your mother your father or your child
how will you treat them everyone has
something to contribute because we are
all building social value in some
community we belong to some where the
social capital of any society is
directly measured by the strength of its
fundamental unit the family when a
community is successful families are
united and fulfilled just as we would
assess the health of an ecosystem like a
forest by judging the health of its
trees so too we can gauge the wealth of
society’s capital by looking at the
status of its families be that
pro-social person be that Andrea step
away from your orbit your community your
family and yourself find someone who
needs what you have and help them earn
it
introduce yourself to your neighbors if
you haven’t eat at a different
restaurant or visit a different
congregation this weekend disrupt your
orbit and hold a space for someone
amazing to enter your world I can
promise
there is no greater thrill than watching
someone climb that social ladder no
better feeling to extend the hand to
another human not because they belong to
the same community as you but because
they are worthy of your respect and now
you are a pro-social thinker today I’m
happy to say that I am proud of my
communities and I know they are proud of
me thank you
you
[Applause]
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