sticks and stones may break my bones but
words will never hurt me but words do
hurt because we’re human beings we live
in language we are emotional beings
I’ve been called bitch plenty of times
in my life like most women have in fact
I can remember the very first time I was
called a bitch
I remember where I was my age who said
it and why most importantly I remember
how I felt I was 18 years old I was in
the backseat of a car with a couple guys
driving to a party and we’re having fun
but the driver was driving erratic and
fast and it was scaring me scaring me
bad and I repeatedly asked the driver
please slow down you’re upsetting me
which he ignored he ignored it and so
shortly after we stopped for beverages
to get something to drink
they came back in the car and they threw
a button in the backseat and the button
said bitch bitch bitch they use that
button to silence my voice to shut me up
it worked as you see I was still finding
myself as a young girl I was still
looking for my core beliefs building my
self-esteem learning how who I was and
how I was showing up in the world and my
interpretation of bitch back then was it
was something really bad it was really a
naughty cuss word and it was of course
my first time hearing it now this is not
about what two guys did to me way back
when it’s about it could be anybody it
could have been a couple females it
could have been a woman or a man it
doesn’t matter what matters is they used
a derogatory word to silence my voice
and it
now our words are part of how we
communicate how we coordinate action
which each other words are incredibly
important the context of the words the
the meanings behind them its how that we
the context is part of how we build our
belief system and how we move in the
world is how we’re interpreting and
takin this context in the bitch has
evolved over time it was never meant to
be the word that it is today in fact the
definition of bitch started out to be a
female dog in 1000 AD it evolved over
time in the 15th century it was changed
to a lewd and sensual woman but
metaphorically what they were saying was
it was a bitch in heat a woman who
really wanted it but in the 1800’s it
was known to be one of the most
offensive word that you could call an
English woman even more so than being
called a whore in 1910 to 1930 it also
evolved into more where they started to
double it and using it into literature
and newspapers in fact Ernest Hemingway
used it to describe characters that were
edgy and had grit which I loved that
part in the 60s
Hollywood started to use it as a way to
create characters that work that had
bitch bitchy parts to them Joan Crawford
and Betty Davis come to mind because
those two women played really strong
bitches but interesting enough they had
a big rivalry going between them if you
remember this going pretty far back but
they had a rivalry that they were known
to be calling each other bitches in the
media which was then doc Bennett they
sanctioned it and they would
play it but I remember hearing Betty
Davis on Johnny Carson which was a late
night TV show and I remember hearing her
say Johnny
now listen she had a cigarette like this
long the bitch is dead and that was used
in in some ways it was a used as a
punishment to tell everybody I didn’t
like her but it was depicting this
strong incredible women now bitches in
the urban dictionary has taken on a
whole nother playing field pop culture
has changed bitch in such a huge way
that now bitch is considered to be
females who don’t have class who don’t
know how to shut that F up usually
pretty fake backstabbers hoes liars and
someone with no self-respect
that’s the interpretations now in the
urban dictionary there are over seven
hundred by the way and let me tell you
it is painful to see that diverse
interpretations of bitch that people are
putting in the urban dictionary and it’s
growing and one year it went from 550 to
over 740 now what would it be like if we
took the word bitch and asked everybody
in the world to go back and use it for
its true meaning and stop misusing the
word and the answer is they’re not going
to they’re not able to because they have
a right to that interpretation but
here’s what you can do you couldn’t
change your interpretation of the word
so that it will no longer be used
against you you can use the word as a
positive empowerment word instead of
something negative you only have the
power of what you say it means to you so
this is what the world is really saying
to you when they’re calling you a bitch
they’re saying I don’t like what you’re
doing
and it’s making me feel uncomfortable
and that’s great I get that that that
happens but that’s not what that’s not
up to me to decide on whether or not
they feel that way or not I can only
change myself but I can tell you that
when you were showing up big and bold
and strong and a leader and you’re
you’ve got a big voice they’re gonna use
bitch but it doesn’t have to silence
your voice you don’t have to allow them
to take that away from you because I
know that what they’re up to is they are
they are going to create this this whole
case around the reason why they can
defend what they think that the women
are being bitches when really what
they’re up to is about putting you down
and silencing your voice and that’s not
necessarily a good thing for women so
the call to action to women is this
change your interpretation of what bitch
means for you so that when someone calls
you a bitch the answer to this is was
thank you because when you say thank you
to the person who’s called you a bitch
you are disempowering their intent to
harm you and putting the power back into
your own self so life is about choices
we can choose to live a powerful life we
can choose to interpret it any way that
we want we are women of the world we
have a right to use our voice we should
not be silenced because we’re doing
something that someone else doesn’t like
so please choose empowerment for your
interpretation for yourself for all
women
and especially our daughters thank you
[Applause]
[Music]
[Applause] [Music]
words will never hurt me but words do
hurt because we’re human beings we live
in language we are emotional beings
I’ve been called bitch plenty of times
in my life like most women have in fact
I can remember the very first time I was
called a bitch
I remember where I was my age who said
it and why most importantly I remember
how I felt I was 18 years old I was in
the backseat of a car with a couple guys
driving to a party and we’re having fun
but the driver was driving erratic and
fast and it was scaring me scaring me
bad and I repeatedly asked the driver
please slow down you’re upsetting me
which he ignored he ignored it and so
shortly after we stopped for beverages
to get something to drink
they came back in the car and they threw
a button in the backseat and the button
said bitch bitch bitch they use that
button to silence my voice to shut me up
it worked as you see I was still finding
myself as a young girl I was still
looking for my core beliefs building my
self-esteem learning how who I was and
how I was showing up in the world and my
interpretation of bitch back then was it
was something really bad it was really a
naughty cuss word and it was of course
my first time hearing it now this is not
about what two guys did to me way back
when it’s about it could be anybody it
could have been a couple females it
could have been a woman or a man it
doesn’t matter what matters is they used
a derogatory word to silence my voice
and it
now our words are part of how we
communicate how we coordinate action
which each other words are incredibly
important the context of the words the
the meanings behind them its how that we
the context is part of how we build our
belief system and how we move in the
world is how we’re interpreting and
takin this context in the bitch has
evolved over time it was never meant to
be the word that it is today in fact the
definition of bitch started out to be a
female dog in 1000 AD it evolved over
time in the 15th century it was changed
to a lewd and sensual woman but
metaphorically what they were saying was
it was a bitch in heat a woman who
really wanted it but in the 1800’s it
was known to be one of the most
offensive word that you could call an
English woman even more so than being
called a whore in 1910 to 1930 it also
evolved into more where they started to
double it and using it into literature
and newspapers in fact Ernest Hemingway
used it to describe characters that were
edgy and had grit which I loved that
part in the 60s
Hollywood started to use it as a way to
create characters that work that had
bitch bitchy parts to them Joan Crawford
and Betty Davis come to mind because
those two women played really strong
bitches but interesting enough they had
a big rivalry going between them if you
remember this going pretty far back but
they had a rivalry that they were known
to be calling each other bitches in the
media which was then doc Bennett they
sanctioned it and they would
play it but I remember hearing Betty
Davis on Johnny Carson which was a late
night TV show and I remember hearing her
say Johnny
now listen she had a cigarette like this
long the bitch is dead and that was used
in in some ways it was a used as a
punishment to tell everybody I didn’t
like her but it was depicting this
strong incredible women now bitches in
the urban dictionary has taken on a
whole nother playing field pop culture
has changed bitch in such a huge way
that now bitch is considered to be
females who don’t have class who don’t
know how to shut that F up usually
pretty fake backstabbers hoes liars and
someone with no self-respect
that’s the interpretations now in the
urban dictionary there are over seven
hundred by the way and let me tell you
it is painful to see that diverse
interpretations of bitch that people are
putting in the urban dictionary and it’s
growing and one year it went from 550 to
over 740 now what would it be like if we
took the word bitch and asked everybody
in the world to go back and use it for
its true meaning and stop misusing the
word and the answer is they’re not going
to they’re not able to because they have
a right to that interpretation but
here’s what you can do you couldn’t
change your interpretation of the word
so that it will no longer be used
against you you can use the word as a
positive empowerment word instead of
something negative you only have the
power of what you say it means to you so
this is what the world is really saying
to you when they’re calling you a bitch
they’re saying I don’t like what you’re
doing
and it’s making me feel uncomfortable
and that’s great I get that that that
happens but that’s not what that’s not
up to me to decide on whether or not
they feel that way or not I can only
change myself but I can tell you that
when you were showing up big and bold
and strong and a leader and you’re
you’ve got a big voice they’re gonna use
bitch but it doesn’t have to silence
your voice you don’t have to allow them
to take that away from you because I
know that what they’re up to is they are
they are going to create this this whole
case around the reason why they can
defend what they think that the women
are being bitches when really what
they’re up to is about putting you down
and silencing your voice and that’s not
necessarily a good thing for women so
the call to action to women is this
change your interpretation of what bitch
means for you so that when someone calls
you a bitch the answer to this is was
thank you because when you say thank you
to the person who’s called you a bitch
you are disempowering their intent to
harm you and putting the power back into
your own self so life is about choices
we can choose to live a powerful life we
can choose to interpret it any way that
we want we are women of the world we
have a right to use our voice we should
not be silenced because we’re doing
something that someone else doesn’t like
so please choose empowerment for your
interpretation for yourself for all
women
and especially our daughters thank you
[Applause]
[Music]
[Applause] [Music]
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