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100 Days of Solitude | Nidaa Badwan | TEDxCittàdiSanMarino


[Music]
hello I’m a unit but two come from
gaza strip I was born and in the
emirates
after nine years I went to live
at home because my family is from
home a city a little bit like home but
when someone knows how
city ​​in fact but when a city does not
there is a city ​​imagined by the writer
of the book of a hundred years of solitude
it does not exist but exists in its head
exists with another house name that is
suffered this isolated city from the world
suffered a lot with the wars with
religion policy problems of
religion here is my story I want
speak 20 21 in 15 minutes
talk about 20 days of 20 months of
loneliness inside my room three
meters for three
because it happened one day November 2013
19 that I was with a place
public
let’s say we talked we were thinking of doing one
something for the culture for the boys
let’s activate the situation a little
we can do that, I can not like it
woman is staying with with other guys
males a public post and also without
veil I was very rebella indeed the
militia of hamas
our home government are
They brought me to the prison
they beat me they did everything
what you think even more for eight
days I was going back I was in the
prison that my dad to quit
to finish this thing to finish
this bad dream had to stop for
a document but back inside mine
room my room three meters for three
inside my room there is a window
baby with me, I remember mine was there
closet that was a staircase that made like
like or closet my car photo for
I photographed and rotated there I had
of things does not exist in a room of
a girl became my my
My mice later I entered inside
camera blades what I want to do
there is not anything to do or take
that way I do what they do
they want to win another person for
their
I become crazy and because inside my house or with
I myself am a person of heart I am
another right outside for the whole
day if they want to work or I want to
see people said
[Music]
there’s nothing to do I ‘ve been inside
my room at the beginning any
person who wants to be inside one
room I do not want to say for a month but
put a week becomes crazy
one thing you can not imagine for
to understand we must do this
better not to do it anyway the first one
first month I was very badly wanted
dying is this idea that I had
I wanted to die
I thought the way to die as I can
die I can do so I can not do
so one day my mother came back from
I had a market with some vegetables
seen in the earth as always in the
earth in the corner I cried as always
since I’m like that then he told me
keep these onions this vegetables you can
help me instead of staying I said go
good but look a bit
I do not know I do not know what was in mine
head I did not think of anything I did not
I wanted nothing from the world I wanted to die
enough I did not think of making you a project
I did not think of turning things
bad make it as good as I thought before
as I was doing forever because it’s all
my energy gone I did not have anymore
power
I can not do anything at all then
that idea just left away
then took these these vegetables afterwards
looked like they always like how
as always, I am an artist and I am
always see things I always see
things like that if I want to look at one
let’s say one face and look
I look at the frame and the most beautiful one
and with center also in the face
anything then I looked so
so I can do this here
that here I took the picture after not
I want to make a position he did
this position was for two hours
so three hours
I worked for this photo until the end
I did not understand why you did this
position because he was crying because I was doing it
so I did not know I knew what I wanted to do
this photo, however, I discovered later
after when I finished all the project I have
understood why he cries because he did
this position but at that moment not
I understood then made this picture after two
hours my mother came back thinking that the
all its bubbles are found in the
this dish was then made a lot
problem like but there is no problem then
published this picture on the internet a
facebook site but for photographers
worldwide this cost is written below
that in the city that no longer exists I have
finished the love I try in my room
three meters by three
and makes this world say and after the
people have all written me beautiful
quintino but nobody knew what I do
why did this photo with only that i
liked
and the photos slowly made another one
the other while I was doing the photo had me
called let’s say the manager is yes
asked to do an exhibition in Jerusalem
made the Jerusalem exhibition were 14
photos are still now 25 photos had me
asked to do the show is done the
shows definitely made the show I was
inside my room
and this after a year 4 months almost from
that day I do not want to say that changed
my life but slowly it was
changing my life is because new york
times wrote my story
on the first page from the others and many
other newspapers have written about me one
of those was at the courier in the evening
and here began another story that
multi-grimano terme with many basins
spa
they invited me to do an exhibition
multi catini and the other montegrimano
made the show or montecatini and multiples
human but this time I was here that I saw
my show for the first time and that
I understood what that means
photo the first picture because I say one
of those who came to see the
show had asked me, but who is there?
first picture you did and I shot
so it’s because I did not remember why
I used to take a month to do
a picture because I was waiting for the right light
to come from the window I studied the
color I studied the shadow I studied the
position
I studied everything there had been time
24 hours a day luckily there was the
Minister of Culture of San Marino a
montegrimano to see
my show and had asked to come
visitari sea this morning and they did
a meeting in this meeting will have
asked if I’d like to have a say
a workshop at the university of san marino
certainly from here with my life changed
also a strange thing that san marino la
city ​​of freedom that I do not know if it was
by chance or o there was something in york
orders from my room from prison
until San Marino, the city of freedom
let’s say and from here found everything tried
found love freedom in this regard
thanks again my show is turning
to the world new york gone to new york
certainly san marino in Italy so many
many cities in Italy maybe at the beginning
it was hard for me to talk about mine
history because I already inside it
loneliness forgotten what that
it was because I was taking up my time
do many other things
but here it was necessary if you see that it was there
need to talk about my story not
for me, maybe you ‘ve heard me so many times
I feel agitated miss and can not hear me
agitated because I speak I speak from so much
people
at the beginning never mentioned because this
history hurts me a lot when when
when I need to talk about this
history because it is very heavy but in the
same time I hope my story
arrives for other girls who understand
what does it mean I ‘m not freedom
all you have so many others
people do not know who and 2 million
people at home can not have that
that you have us like boys then
finished
[Applause]
[Music]
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