so I am currently practicing
non-monogamy living with a girlfriend
that I’m sexually active with and have
other lovers and sweethearts in addition
to her I’m free to date anybody right
now I’m I’m just dating yes last few
months yeah I’ve been single just uh had
sex I’d once in the last few months
recently separated from like a really
long term partner so I have more
openness in my life so I’ve mostly been
with women in the last few months I’ve
been desiring to like physically be with
a man like sexually in a way that
basically giving over control okay I
want like a guy to fuck my brains out
and like shit overpower me and like
almost like the shit that I’ve been told
my whole life is is the way men and
women are supposed to relate like that
masculinity is powerful and femininities
to be submissive and like I’ve kind of
rejected that my life for like haven’t
desired that because it’s been like in
mainstream but like now I’m like really
interested in in playing into that role
a bit more and like seeing what it feels
like to give over power to someone and
be totally in their hands a big part of
my sexual life and sexual fantasy has
been sort of informed by an attraction
to the fantasy of an unwilling partner
vicious fantasies I love men and so the
idea of two beautiful beings being with
me and treating me like a queen like
feeding me grapes kind of thing and like
fanning me like one man could do that
but it’d be so much better if there were
two I just really want to get it like a
really nice girl and like someone who
likes to get like maybe a little rough
like a little slapping my like slapping
and I like being like really sweet but I
really rough at the same time kind of
like going switch it back and forth just
like Bostic arounds I remember when a
summer I was with that girl I wanted to
tie her up and kind of like it’s like
leave her there like I’m up to a pole
it’s like leave her there and like
a feeder someone thought it was crazy
stuff now like a little slave type
scenario right like she would be a down
for it obviously Dean would be crossing
boundaries I always imagined it and in a
kind of a painstaking slow process where
I’m never quite sure what’s going to
happen so for example I suppose if I was
in a public situation maybe sitting
somewhere maybe on a bus I don’t really
have too much option of moving around
and I feel someone get a little bit
closer to me and like okay and you know
it’s crowded sure and then I feel
something else like a hand wandering I’m
like okay well you know sometimes we
don’t know what apprehends
sounds like okay like does he know that
that’s my butt like this you know you
don’t really know and it’s kind of
moving around I’m not entirely sure if
he knows what’s going on or she I guess
I really want to give over control and
be dominated by man but I also like have
a skepticism I don’t know if if a man
wants to dominate me if he wants to do
it for a like respectful reason like
like does he want to do it because it’s
something we agree on and he respects me
and wants to please me or is there
something else going on for him
eventually you start asking questions
about yourself I don’t know why I find
something so distasteful so genuinely
distasteful in reality so appealing in
fantasy I can only presume again it’s
about power
women are so easily capable of being
with other women but for men it’s still
a difficult thing so I’m really
intrigued with the idea of men coming
together and having sexual experiences
without feeling like they’re not
sticking to their own identities rather
they’re really stepping into their own
skin by experiencing another sexual
encounter
I very shy guide like Louis MC masong
younger now recently I have more like
confidence and some once I do get the
girl I do a lot of things like I can do
a lot of craziness stuff but I just
don’t get to that moment a lot so I
guess it’s like kind of like alright
girl I can find I guess in a way I don’t
know yeah I think true I mean trust is
necessary and anything I think any
relation that you would have with
another person hmm the tough part is
that so much of this fantasy is about me
not knowing what’s going to happen so
the more I plan the more I know and it’s
a really tricky situation I’m trying to
figure out how I can create something
that is both safe and unknown to me seems a little bit far-fetched
non-monogamy living with a girlfriend
that I’m sexually active with and have
other lovers and sweethearts in addition
to her I’m free to date anybody right
now I’m I’m just dating yes last few
months yeah I’ve been single just uh had
sex I’d once in the last few months
recently separated from like a really
long term partner so I have more
openness in my life so I’ve mostly been
with women in the last few months I’ve
been desiring to like physically be with
a man like sexually in a way that
basically giving over control okay I
want like a guy to fuck my brains out
and like shit overpower me and like
almost like the shit that I’ve been told
my whole life is is the way men and
women are supposed to relate like that
masculinity is powerful and femininities
to be submissive and like I’ve kind of
rejected that my life for like haven’t
desired that because it’s been like in
mainstream but like now I’m like really
interested in in playing into that role
a bit more and like seeing what it feels
like to give over power to someone and
be totally in their hands a big part of
my sexual life and sexual fantasy has
been sort of informed by an attraction
to the fantasy of an unwilling partner
vicious fantasies I love men and so the
idea of two beautiful beings being with
me and treating me like a queen like
feeding me grapes kind of thing and like
fanning me like one man could do that
but it’d be so much better if there were
two I just really want to get it like a
really nice girl and like someone who
likes to get like maybe a little rough
like a little slapping my like slapping
and I like being like really sweet but I
really rough at the same time kind of
like going switch it back and forth just
like Bostic arounds I remember when a
summer I was with that girl I wanted to
tie her up and kind of like it’s like
leave her there like I’m up to a pole
it’s like leave her there and like
a feeder someone thought it was crazy
stuff now like a little slave type
scenario right like she would be a down
for it obviously Dean would be crossing
boundaries I always imagined it and in a
kind of a painstaking slow process where
I’m never quite sure what’s going to
happen so for example I suppose if I was
in a public situation maybe sitting
somewhere maybe on a bus I don’t really
have too much option of moving around
and I feel someone get a little bit
closer to me and like okay and you know
it’s crowded sure and then I feel
something else like a hand wandering I’m
like okay well you know sometimes we
don’t know what apprehends
sounds like okay like does he know that
that’s my butt like this you know you
don’t really know and it’s kind of
moving around I’m not entirely sure if
he knows what’s going on or she I guess
I really want to give over control and
be dominated by man but I also like have
a skepticism I don’t know if if a man
wants to dominate me if he wants to do
it for a like respectful reason like
like does he want to do it because it’s
something we agree on and he respects me
and wants to please me or is there
something else going on for him
eventually you start asking questions
about yourself I don’t know why I find
something so distasteful so genuinely
distasteful in reality so appealing in
fantasy I can only presume again it’s
about power
women are so easily capable of being
with other women but for men it’s still
a difficult thing so I’m really
intrigued with the idea of men coming
together and having sexual experiences
without feeling like they’re not
sticking to their own identities rather
they’re really stepping into their own
skin by experiencing another sexual
encounter
I very shy guide like Louis MC masong
younger now recently I have more like
confidence and some once I do get the
girl I do a lot of things like I can do
a lot of craziness stuff but I just
don’t get to that moment a lot so I
guess it’s like kind of like alright
girl I can find I guess in a way I don’t
know yeah I think true I mean trust is
necessary and anything I think any
relation that you would have with
another person hmm the tough part is
that so much of this fantasy is about me
not knowing what’s going to happen so
the more I plan the more I know and it’s
a really tricky situation I’m trying to
figure out how I can create something
that is both safe and unknown to me seems a little bit far-fetched
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