strangers in the night exchanging
glances wandering in the night what were
the chances we’d be sharing love before
you sounded beautiful I don’t know how I
did the vocal warm-ups but I was too shy
to sing alone and in there so grab hold
of the nearest stranger if you’re
sitting between two friends the nearest
stranger might be in front of you
silently grab don’t take the strangers
hand because God knows where that’s been
we are the loudest people I’ve ever met
God okay now don’t let it go until I
okay your best friend might meet this
stranger at a rock show and they might
sit in a parked car talking for hours
and when they break up ten years later
the stranger the one whose arm you’re
holding right now might call you sobbing
at odd hours of the night asking what
did I do wrong and you will say you did
nothing wrong practices now say you did
nothing wrong
that’s just a short thing I knew you
guys would take advantage of that that’s
just a few words okay or you may never
meet this stranger again but in a few
years but but you may years from now
talk to the strangers grown child in
another country and never put it
together that you once held his mother
incidentally the stranger’s child will
be very politically engaged and you will
do a lot of bluffing to keep up with the
twists and turns of a conversation or a
few weeks from now you might be at a
restaurant with some friends and the
people at the next table might be
laughing incredibly loudly and with
great frequency and not at all
innocently you will think to yourself
they’re laughing as if they are better
than everybody else the loudest laughter
the ringleader has an especially
arrogant cackle you imagine marching
over there and punching the loudest
laugher in the face which is exactly the
kind of fantasy you’ve been trying not
to have recently in an effort to
apologize for the imaginary thrashing
you smile at the loudest laugher who you
suddenly realize is the stranger whose
arm you held a few weeks ago at that
Miranda July thing
or this stranger might not have a drug
problem now but later a few years after
you become friends with the stranger you
will realize with a sigh that it’s best
to take everything the stranger says
with a grain of salt sigh now in
this is the first time you’ve touched
the stranger but the two of you might
touch again alone in the dark
the stranger might ask you if that feels
good and you might you might reply with
an ambiguous mumble that the stranger
couldn’t possibly understand and you
feel the stranger wanting to repeat the
question but deciding not to and now
it’s too late for you to clarify your
reply which was affirmative
coincidentally I would like to say to
you now it’s never too late this
stranger will die sooner or later and
you probably won’t be there to help the
stranger let go of their life which was
made of many many individual moments
this being one of them
give the stranger’s arm a gentle squeeze
right now as if to say go on you can do
it silently silently
as if to say go on you can do it just
let go without really thinking about it
as if life were a cup or a rock or a
piece of string you can let go of the
so with the with the man who these
tweezers belong to please come up to the
stage good you brought your program your
stealthier all right let’s just put that
there for you so these tweezers which
you kindly gave to me in the lobby what
do you use them for
um Mike Oh to tweeze how have you I have
from that area and I’ll make a line
uh-huh and that seems great
and is there something there that you
feel like is different than on other
now you just focus on it more yeah yeah
and and when might you tweeze like
before you go out or out to see someone
I kind of leave it for ages and if I eat
it’s obvious to me that I will write
about it and is there anyone in your
life who who would notices when you’ve
done that or not yeah maybe my best
friend okay is your best friend here or
dog um and where did you meet your best
friend oh where was that in Australia oh
and when did you move here um about a
year ago a year and a half
okay and what brought you here uh to do
my PhD to study okay
and and were you lonely at first or was
it easy oh I’m kind of have been sort of
half here and half not here so I’m great
traveling yeah it’s nice excited
yeah I’ve been digitally loyally but I
live in Holland it before years okay
ciara world traveler friendly yeah okay
um and do you live alone oh dude are you
in a relationship
no when when was the last relationship
you were in hmm maybe like achlys ago
and how long did that last
mmm like six months what’s the longest
okay well I was weird I mean it’s hard
to yeah yeah and what uh who broke up
with who I for a coat
are you more often the one that does the
usually it’s amicable yeah um was this a
man or woman it was a man and uh were
there any it wasn’t love or no hmm not
so much um and and are you looking for
ah and do you have any you don’t have
any great ambitions in the in the love
Department how old are you
so he’s free okay um and are your
parents alive yeah all right
well thank you I think
he’s less of a stranger the only thing
now is what’s your name Christian
Christian okay thank you so much for for
sharing that yourself with us you can be
um I’m now gonna auction off Christians
tweezers um they’re gonna go this is
sort of dizzy um they’re gonna go in
this special commemorative envelope it
says on Sunday October 23rd 2011 I
attended a an event at the School of
Life there was an auction during the
event and I bid I got caught up in the
frenzy and I bid and I won I won the
item in this envelope it used to belong
to someone else
but now it belongs to me this is all
true and it’s been verified below by
Miranda July of all people and then then
there’s a place for me to sign and then
a place for a Christian to sign and then
a place for good old you to sign but we
don’t know who that will be yet let me
put it in so you should figure out how
much money you have and how much you’re
willing to spend today because this is
real money all right do I have two
pounds for the tweezers that yes I do do
I have three pounds do I have five
pounds yes do I have seven pounds for
Christians tweezers in the back do I
have ten pounds for Christians tweezers
do I have fifteen pounds fifteen okay
do I have fifty pounds for Christians
tweezers yes
do I have 65 pounds Christians tweezers
think about it six was I had 65 pounds
for Christians tweezers 65 pounds
Oh sixty do I have seventy pounds for
Christians tweezers 70 70 70 70 am same
person you don’t have to do that drive
is 75 pounds for Christian preachers
these will go to a good cause tonight
that will be revealed today whatever I’m
at 770 where do we have 70 pounds 70
pounds going once going twice
so low over here
do I have 80 pounds yes that would be
you yeah 80 pounds for Christian
Streeters 85 pounds 85 pounds oh it’s
like you’re right across right okay 90
pounds 95 95 90 pounds going once going
100 pounds
do I have 105 110 110 in the back a new
contender
okay so 110 so how does 110 – the new
contender in the back going once going
oh I’m sure there’s some rule about this
are there any professional auctioneers
over here I think once I start saying
I’m not used to being tried on these
things
oh gosh and perhaps for the sake of time
although we’re doing okay okay just for
the show of it okay
so uh so you’ll want to make your way
down here to Clementine
it’s some well you can do it now you’re
just one person and so just sort of
quietly do I don’t know if you have do
you have cash is that because this is
you don’t have cash uh-huh okay for the
future this is a cash action
well that might make it a little more
limited but head on down and you’ll
write it you have a check now so sorry I
should have explained the rules so do
you have cash or check
yeah yeah just head on down if it’s a
check then don’t put out who it’s made
to quite yet does that yeah that’s
that’s safe yeah but just put the amount
and and sign in give it to Clementine
and if it’s cash that’s even better
she’s right here okay so you can do that
now and we’re going to move on and I’ll
give this to you
oh and I have to sign it actually
there’s a lot of signing that has to
oh I got one Thank You Christian you’ll
so Clementi can you have him sign
Christian will sign and then the buyer
will sign them and slip that back in
with the the man who received this card
from his daughter for his 60th birthday
so the card says um happy 60th bird this
has just already made me cry backstage
and I put a napkin in my pocket
seriously um uh let’s just turn it
through this okay
um happy 60th birthday dad and then um
you can see here she’s planned all these
events that they’ll go to and you’ve
already been to dr. Lawrence house and
you didn’t go to that one or these are
maybe options if I made a mistake
I was in America for my son’s wedding
for the first one okay right okay so
this is the first one Randa July on
strangers the next one is carrying on
Armstrong on compassion and sir Susan
Greenfield on storytelling which will
bring you through December um let’s see
how to do this I might not spin this one
because it just gonna um okay um so is
it a normal thing that you would see
your daughter this this often yes yes
see each other probably once it was a
week uh-huh and is the son that you
mentioned is that her brother oh yeah we
believe her younger brother and um are
you still with her mother
yes yeah um and are you are you close
uh with although yes one in particular
real I’m asking about Joe Joe’s Joe’s
the daughter hear something yeah
this however bicycles each other once a
week and I look out a grand up to my god
yes yeah well sweet ah
and have you always been close yes
um did oh gosh ah how how do you do that
like yeah lucky so yeah okay this is a
person who like if there’s just any
father daughter anything in a movie just
like referenced I like go to pieces so
that’s a real trial for me we’re not
even talking reading it um okay uh um
what do you do I’m retired
I’m losses on a solemn uh-huh retire
lipid early because I my wife told me
Republic huge Sarah down date okay when
did you meet your wife
what are they do and she was held
everything about you is amazing too and
and at the time did she seem like much
yeah
how did you meet I was student in
Cambridge she was teaching Henry she was
a teacher in the price are you mad at a
party yeah we were introduced by the guy
right Wow
haha and do you remember like was it
immediate or turn or took a little while
or about three weeks after we met the
vacation started and alibi when he
checked around Europe and we spent like
three and a half months each on Iran
Europe and it sort of became very common
we just realized that we were kind of
said the other row but it was didn’t
happen at the part you happened well we
were right yeah yeah and so now it’s
congratulate and has it been like has it
always been easy or is it it has wow
what I mean it’s supposed to be up and
down there was a difficulty when she
loved drive she didn’t like the fact
that I always got into driving the car
right maybe just haha when we realized
that my threshold for the laundry
gossiping food was different right
but it’s been almost loan okay alright
wow those things though can oh yeah
escalate and and so what does Joe do
yeah you’re a lawyer
tell us but now this how and so you had
sort of an initial misgiving when I
asked him if he had anything he was
willing to give away and and he said the
car you’re right
ah um so what when is your birthday
when Rose is coming uh-huh right
well I’m so glad that we all got to
celebrate your 60th birthday with you in
a way and maybe there’ll be some other
of these people who you’ll see in the
coming Sundays thank you so much thank
just right there and what was your name
do I have $5 for Bob’s card pounds if
you guys were there you’d be doing the
same thing do I have 5 pounds 10 pounds
15 20 25 30 pounds 40 pounds 40 pounds
for Bob’s card that Joe made for him 45
pounds 45 pounds for the card that Joe
made for her father Bob for his 60th
50 pounds 55 pounds 55 55 pounds 60
pounds 70 70 pounds 70 pounds for the
card that is handmade on one side and
what am i at sixty sixty pounds 70
pounds 70 pounds for this card 70 pounds
do I have 75 75 pounds 80 pounds 80
pounds for Joe’s card 80 pounds 85
pounds 85 pounds and 90 pounds 90 90
pounds
you already are 85% yeah 85 still do we
have 90 pounds or is it going Oh 90
pounds 100 pounds 100 over here 110
pounds for this card 110 pounds 110
going for 9,500 pounds over here going
all right well here you’ll see um so now
what’s the math on what what we’ve made
so far are commenting so this was a
hundred I can’t remember they’re
counting over there for the three items
combined two hundred and forty five okay
so now well 245 pounds is not a lot of
money but there have been times in my
life where 245 pounds would have
actually like made a difference you know
what it would have been essentially like
a jackpot amount of money to get out of
out of the blue that’s not the case
right now but if you’re at that point in
your life you can be any age any kind of
person if you’re at that point where
that amount of money actually like has
an effect on this month then you you
probably know it so think think for a
moment that’s true or if that’s not
really true maybe that used to be true
but it’s not true right now and put your
your head down shut your eyes put your
head down and really really like this is
for real like you have to I would put
your head down more almost like a crash
and kind of put your your hands around
the sides of your head like blinders
this this isn’t for you this is this is
to protect someone else’s sense of
privacy so really do it for this other
person nothing’s going to happen to you
and it is important that you all do it
yeah not not for your own sake this is a
form of generosity
seriously nothing’s going on here
because what I’m going to ask is for you
to raise your hand if you are at that
point and I don’t want anyone else to
see this is a private thing so think
about it if you’re at the point where
245 pounds would make a difference raise
your hand sit up
the grant that you all chipped in on
together has been given to a stranger in
the audience someone who needed it so
those of you who who bid thank you for
for your generosity and for sharing it
too with another stranger here among us
who knows who this is the end of the
sermon of help strangers thank you for coming and have a wonderful Sunday
glances wandering in the night what were
the chances we’d be sharing love before
you sounded beautiful I don’t know how I
did the vocal warm-ups but I was too shy
to sing alone and in there so grab hold
of the nearest stranger if you’re
sitting between two friends the nearest
stranger might be in front of you
silently grab don’t take the strangers
hand because God knows where that’s been
we are the loudest people I’ve ever met
God okay now don’t let it go until I
okay your best friend might meet this
stranger at a rock show and they might
sit in a parked car talking for hours
and when they break up ten years later
the stranger the one whose arm you’re
holding right now might call you sobbing
at odd hours of the night asking what
did I do wrong and you will say you did
nothing wrong practices now say you did
nothing wrong
that’s just a short thing I knew you
guys would take advantage of that that’s
just a few words okay or you may never
meet this stranger again but in a few
years but but you may years from now
talk to the strangers grown child in
another country and never put it
together that you once held his mother
incidentally the stranger’s child will
be very politically engaged and you will
do a lot of bluffing to keep up with the
twists and turns of a conversation or a
few weeks from now you might be at a
restaurant with some friends and the
people at the next table might be
laughing incredibly loudly and with
great frequency and not at all
innocently you will think to yourself
they’re laughing as if they are better
than everybody else the loudest laughter
the ringleader has an especially
arrogant cackle you imagine marching
over there and punching the loudest
laugher in the face which is exactly the
kind of fantasy you’ve been trying not
to have recently in an effort to
apologize for the imaginary thrashing
you smile at the loudest laugher who you
suddenly realize is the stranger whose
arm you held a few weeks ago at that
Miranda July thing
or this stranger might not have a drug
problem now but later a few years after
you become friends with the stranger you
will realize with a sigh that it’s best
to take everything the stranger says
with a grain of salt sigh now in
this is the first time you’ve touched
the stranger but the two of you might
touch again alone in the dark
the stranger might ask you if that feels
good and you might you might reply with
an ambiguous mumble that the stranger
couldn’t possibly understand and you
feel the stranger wanting to repeat the
question but deciding not to and now
it’s too late for you to clarify your
reply which was affirmative
coincidentally I would like to say to
you now it’s never too late this
stranger will die sooner or later and
you probably won’t be there to help the
stranger let go of their life which was
made of many many individual moments
this being one of them
give the stranger’s arm a gentle squeeze
right now as if to say go on you can do
it silently silently
as if to say go on you can do it just
let go without really thinking about it
as if life were a cup or a rock or a
piece of string you can let go of the
so with the with the man who these
tweezers belong to please come up to the
stage good you brought your program your
stealthier all right let’s just put that
there for you so these tweezers which
you kindly gave to me in the lobby what
do you use them for
um Mike Oh to tweeze how have you I have
from that area and I’ll make a line
uh-huh and that seems great
and is there something there that you
feel like is different than on other
now you just focus on it more yeah yeah
and and when might you tweeze like
before you go out or out to see someone
I kind of leave it for ages and if I eat
it’s obvious to me that I will write
about it and is there anyone in your
life who who would notices when you’ve
done that or not yeah maybe my best
friend okay is your best friend here or
dog um and where did you meet your best
friend oh where was that in Australia oh
and when did you move here um about a
year ago a year and a half
okay and what brought you here uh to do
my PhD to study okay
and and were you lonely at first or was
it easy oh I’m kind of have been sort of
half here and half not here so I’m great
traveling yeah it’s nice excited
yeah I’ve been digitally loyally but I
live in Holland it before years okay
ciara world traveler friendly yeah okay
um and do you live alone oh dude are you
in a relationship
no when when was the last relationship
you were in hmm maybe like achlys ago
and how long did that last
mmm like six months what’s the longest
okay well I was weird I mean it’s hard
to yeah yeah and what uh who broke up
with who I for a coat
are you more often the one that does the
usually it’s amicable yeah um was this a
man or woman it was a man and uh were
there any it wasn’t love or no hmm not
so much um and and are you looking for
ah and do you have any you don’t have
any great ambitions in the in the love
Department how old are you
so he’s free okay um and are your
parents alive yeah all right
well thank you I think
he’s less of a stranger the only thing
now is what’s your name Christian
Christian okay thank you so much for for
sharing that yourself with us you can be
um I’m now gonna auction off Christians
tweezers um they’re gonna go this is
sort of dizzy um they’re gonna go in
this special commemorative envelope it
says on Sunday October 23rd 2011 I
attended a an event at the School of
Life there was an auction during the
event and I bid I got caught up in the
frenzy and I bid and I won I won the
item in this envelope it used to belong
to someone else
but now it belongs to me this is all
true and it’s been verified below by
Miranda July of all people and then then
there’s a place for me to sign and then
a place for a Christian to sign and then
a place for good old you to sign but we
don’t know who that will be yet let me
put it in so you should figure out how
much money you have and how much you’re
willing to spend today because this is
real money all right do I have two
pounds for the tweezers that yes I do do
I have three pounds do I have five
pounds yes do I have seven pounds for
Christians tweezers in the back do I
have ten pounds for Christians tweezers
do I have fifteen pounds fifteen okay
do I have fifty pounds for Christians
tweezers yes
do I have 65 pounds Christians tweezers
think about it six was I had 65 pounds
for Christians tweezers 65 pounds
Oh sixty do I have seventy pounds for
Christians tweezers 70 70 70 70 am same
person you don’t have to do that drive
is 75 pounds for Christian preachers
these will go to a good cause tonight
that will be revealed today whatever I’m
at 770 where do we have 70 pounds 70
pounds going once going twice
so low over here
do I have 80 pounds yes that would be
you yeah 80 pounds for Christian
Streeters 85 pounds 85 pounds oh it’s
like you’re right across right okay 90
pounds 95 95 90 pounds going once going
100 pounds
do I have 105 110 110 in the back a new
contender
okay so 110 so how does 110 – the new
contender in the back going once going
oh I’m sure there’s some rule about this
are there any professional auctioneers
over here I think once I start saying
I’m not used to being tried on these
things
oh gosh and perhaps for the sake of time
although we’re doing okay okay just for
the show of it okay
so uh so you’ll want to make your way
down here to Clementine
it’s some well you can do it now you’re
just one person and so just sort of
quietly do I don’t know if you have do
you have cash is that because this is
you don’t have cash uh-huh okay for the
future this is a cash action
well that might make it a little more
limited but head on down and you’ll
write it you have a check now so sorry I
should have explained the rules so do
you have cash or check
yeah yeah just head on down if it’s a
check then don’t put out who it’s made
to quite yet does that yeah that’s
that’s safe yeah but just put the amount
and and sign in give it to Clementine
and if it’s cash that’s even better
she’s right here okay so you can do that
now and we’re going to move on and I’ll
give this to you
oh and I have to sign it actually
there’s a lot of signing that has to
oh I got one Thank You Christian you’ll
so Clementi can you have him sign
Christian will sign and then the buyer
will sign them and slip that back in
with the the man who received this card
from his daughter for his 60th birthday
so the card says um happy 60th bird this
has just already made me cry backstage
and I put a napkin in my pocket
seriously um uh let’s just turn it
through this okay
um happy 60th birthday dad and then um
you can see here she’s planned all these
events that they’ll go to and you’ve
already been to dr. Lawrence house and
you didn’t go to that one or these are
maybe options if I made a mistake
I was in America for my son’s wedding
for the first one okay right okay so
this is the first one Randa July on
strangers the next one is carrying on
Armstrong on compassion and sir Susan
Greenfield on storytelling which will
bring you through December um let’s see
how to do this I might not spin this one
because it just gonna um okay um so is
it a normal thing that you would see
your daughter this this often yes yes
see each other probably once it was a
week uh-huh and is the son that you
mentioned is that her brother oh yeah we
believe her younger brother and um are
you still with her mother
yes yeah um and are you are you close
uh with although yes one in particular
real I’m asking about Joe Joe’s Joe’s
the daughter hear something yeah
this however bicycles each other once a
week and I look out a grand up to my god
yes yeah well sweet ah
and have you always been close yes
um did oh gosh ah how how do you do that
like yeah lucky so yeah okay this is a
person who like if there’s just any
father daughter anything in a movie just
like referenced I like go to pieces so
that’s a real trial for me we’re not
even talking reading it um okay uh um
what do you do I’m retired
I’m losses on a solemn uh-huh retire
lipid early because I my wife told me
Republic huge Sarah down date okay when
did you meet your wife
what are they do and she was held
everything about you is amazing too and
and at the time did she seem like much
yeah
how did you meet I was student in
Cambridge she was teaching Henry she was
a teacher in the price are you mad at a
party yeah we were introduced by the guy
right Wow
haha and do you remember like was it
immediate or turn or took a little while
or about three weeks after we met the
vacation started and alibi when he
checked around Europe and we spent like
three and a half months each on Iran
Europe and it sort of became very common
we just realized that we were kind of
said the other row but it was didn’t
happen at the part you happened well we
were right yeah yeah and so now it’s
congratulate and has it been like has it
always been easy or is it it has wow
what I mean it’s supposed to be up and
down there was a difficulty when she
loved drive she didn’t like the fact
that I always got into driving the car
right maybe just haha when we realized
that my threshold for the laundry
gossiping food was different right
but it’s been almost loan okay alright
wow those things though can oh yeah
escalate and and so what does Joe do
yeah you’re a lawyer
tell us but now this how and so you had
sort of an initial misgiving when I
asked him if he had anything he was
willing to give away and and he said the
car you’re right
ah um so what when is your birthday
when Rose is coming uh-huh right
well I’m so glad that we all got to
celebrate your 60th birthday with you in
a way and maybe there’ll be some other
of these people who you’ll see in the
coming Sundays thank you so much thank
just right there and what was your name
do I have $5 for Bob’s card pounds if
you guys were there you’d be doing the
same thing do I have 5 pounds 10 pounds
15 20 25 30 pounds 40 pounds 40 pounds
for Bob’s card that Joe made for him 45
pounds 45 pounds for the card that Joe
made for her father Bob for his 60th
50 pounds 55 pounds 55 55 pounds 60
pounds 70 70 pounds 70 pounds for the
card that is handmade on one side and
what am i at sixty sixty pounds 70
pounds 70 pounds for this card 70 pounds
do I have 75 75 pounds 80 pounds 80
pounds for Joe’s card 80 pounds 85
pounds 85 pounds and 90 pounds 90 90
pounds
you already are 85% yeah 85 still do we
have 90 pounds or is it going Oh 90
pounds 100 pounds 100 over here 110
pounds for this card 110 pounds 110
going for 9,500 pounds over here going
all right well here you’ll see um so now
what’s the math on what what we’ve made
so far are commenting so this was a
hundred I can’t remember they’re
counting over there for the three items
combined two hundred and forty five okay
so now well 245 pounds is not a lot of
money but there have been times in my
life where 245 pounds would have
actually like made a difference you know
what it would have been essentially like
a jackpot amount of money to get out of
out of the blue that’s not the case
right now but if you’re at that point in
your life you can be any age any kind of
person if you’re at that point where
that amount of money actually like has
an effect on this month then you you
probably know it so think think for a
moment that’s true or if that’s not
really true maybe that used to be true
but it’s not true right now and put your
your head down shut your eyes put your
head down and really really like this is
for real like you have to I would put
your head down more almost like a crash
and kind of put your your hands around
the sides of your head like blinders
this this isn’t for you this is this is
to protect someone else’s sense of
privacy so really do it for this other
person nothing’s going to happen to you
and it is important that you all do it
yeah not not for your own sake this is a
form of generosity
seriously nothing’s going on here
because what I’m going to ask is for you
to raise your hand if you are at that
point and I don’t want anyone else to
see this is a private thing so think
about it if you’re at the point where
245 pounds would make a difference raise
your hand sit up
the grant that you all chipped in on
together has been given to a stranger in
the audience someone who needed it so
those of you who who bid thank you for
for your generosity and for sharing it
too with another stranger here among us
who knows who this is the end of the
sermon of help strangers thank you for coming and have a wonderful Sunday
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