well thank you for being here and this
is a story about silence and I want to
share with you this story this journey
of silence in a way that I have never
shared with anyone before so I want to
go back to the time it was an oil spill
that happened I gave up riding in cars
my parents thought I was crazy and so
did the people in my community and they
thought I was crazy too and the the
point of not speaking was to actually
give my community a gift cuz I just kind
of talked so much you know I I spoke a
lot and about things that I didn’t know
and I just kept talking and talking and
I would get into arguments and so I
really wanted to to get out of that
place silence is something that’s not
unfamiliar to humans it started back in
well i’m sure about before we first
started talking but in the first century
AD greek philosopher Apollonius
Apollonius of Tyana was reportedly
silent for five years and i you know
what’s so great about that el
philosopher who didn’t speak i guess
that’s something that’s news and and so
he didn’t speak for five years and he
went around in greece and and he became
so famous that he could quell riots by
just showing up and and and making a nod
like you know some people were arguing
about the way a certain ceremony was
being done or a way a certain dance was
done and Apollonius would show up and he
kind of looked at him and they would see
the folly of their ways the silliness of
their of their argument and so they
would stop and it’s reported that it
even wants he called a food riot where
there were a group of people who are
holding
on to the food and they were threatening
the town magistrate who was thank God a
Polonius is here can you do something
can you say something and of course a
Polonius didn’t say anything at all
but that was the whole point and pretty
soon just because he had showed up the
people who stopped their riot and the
people who were hoarding the food
started giving it out
nothing like that happen for me because
if it did I would be there you know
there’s a lot of places where we could
use some peace but for me what I had to
do was on one the first day of the year
I decided I was going to start painting
now I’m still talking and I want to show
you these paintings no one has seen
these paintings this is from back in
1973 the first painting I ever made is a
watercolor don’t laugh but if you are an
artist and you can look at my painting
you go that it’s got a long ways to go
this is sunrise on Tomales Bay and
sunrise on Tomales Bay was my first
major painting I had a the book I use
was it oh it cost 69 cents the paints
were a 39 cent little roll of paints and
I’d gotten this for Christmas and so new
years of my new year’s resolution was to
paint every day and so this was my first
painting my second painting well keeping
a journal is a really good thing because
you get to see where you were before and
say these are artifacts from many years
ago and I get to see I get to look at
where I was before now how I used these
when I started was that I would take
them and show people and they would
say wow man that’s really nice what is
that well that was a periwinkle
I mean periwinkle you know it didn’t
quite look like it doesn’t matter what
it looked like it was my representation
of a periwinkle and that’s all I did and
that was an important part of my day
Tomales Bay my first tree this was going
along really well and then something
happened something happened in February
when I discovered bamboo I discovered
bamboo and I thought that this was a
beautiful plan and what I didn’t realize
but I discovered as well is that it was
the word was ubiquitous and that meant
that it was everywhere and I discovered
that bamboo was everywhere so I decided
that I was not going to mess around with
mountains and trees and things anymore I
was going to work on bamboo and so
that’s what I did
I started painting bamboo I would sit
down and I would sit in front of a stalk
of bamboo and I’d start painting it was
really very restful I found it was more
than restful as I started painting you
can notice that there is something about
the way that bamboo lent itself to being
painted but not all of it needing to be
painted that there were spaces that
could be represent where bamboo was but
the paint wasn’t and I started
experimenting with that that there was
this negative space this silent space
this silence
the stillness and bamboo took me on this
journey because when I first started not
speaking I thought well see this is
great this is going to help me in a way
this is going to help me learn to listen
another thing that it started to help me
realize was that when I did speak I did
speak with the gene you get that one
yeah the forked tongue there that was a
problem I had of kind of exaggerating
exaggerations going into great stories
and great stories going into absolute
lies but I did that for a reason I the
reason was I was always trying to be
someone else I was not satisfied with
being who I was I’d lost that person a
long time ago trying to be pretend to be
someone else trying to be like someone
else and for me as an african-american
you have to understand that as I was
growing up in the 50s there weren’t very
many models for me to to look forward to
you know well there was you know Booker
T Washington there was Frederick
Douglass of course there was you know
Jackie Robinson but then there was
kingfish and then there was the guys I
saw in the newspapers the pictures of
people I saw on the newspapers were
mostly criminals and so I tried to be
anything but who I was that got me into
into big trouble because I was so good
at pretending
that I I pretended so well that I lost
the person that I was I didn’t know who
that person was anymore
and so the silence that not speaking
allowed me to rediscover that
so I say all this to you now and I want
you to know that it’s all documented
it’s documented in in painting and in
writing and this is what happened after
the silence I continued painting bamboo
until finally I could break out of that
and I started painting larger landscapes
and and with words now this is eight
months later eight months after I had
stopped speaking I started writing
because when I stopped speaking at first
I didn’t write at all and how did I
communicate it was all by sign it was
all by mine and was all by acting things
out I want some tea I’m in the
restaurant and I need if I don’t want
tea I want it was very good but it
really takes two and so I started to to
paint and and write and you can see my
paintings are starting to change now I’m
using pen and ink and I’m using the pen
and I I’ve never read these out I would
use these books now I’m travelling
around in my village and up to other
villages I would use these books to say
where I had been
they were the communication and music
and so I want to read this to you I’ve
had this will be the first time I’ve
read this to an audience and this is a
picture of Inverness were where I had
been living and this is October 9 1973
sitting on a wooden bed
in front of the Inverness post office
the morning is new the Miss still
envelops the mountain across the day
business goes on as usual and a familiar
pattern unfolds as the mist disappears
the mountain calls many steps later
point raise station and Inverness lay
below in the distance paper Mill Creek
whines lazily through the meadow on its
way to the bay and the incoming fog is
held momentarily by the ridge before a
spilling through the pines now he says
almost many years ago and I’m not
speaking so this is all coming out of a
place of silence for me this is coming
out of a place where I’m just letting
myself right but I’m only writing about
my natural environment and and that’s
something another thing I have to go
through to just write about what’s going
on around me in nature I’m going to read
one more of these this is a the air is
clean and the sky is clear say for a few
high puffs of clouds on the bay the tide
moves in and the hill sighs have begun
this to sprout their winter greenery the
wind comes in from the ocean and more
clouds gather the music is here now the
mountain sings the seasons are slowly
changing while sitting on the dock and
Inverness
thank you well music has become a part
of my journey now listening to natural
sounds I’m very fortunate to be living
in this beautiful place listening to
water up against the shore and the wind
and the trees and the Jays and all the
sounds that are that are in nature being
able to hear those and and walking in in
this area so it’s a really a wonderful
thing for me but there was something
else that’s inside of me that needed to
come out and and that had to do with
with journey and pilgrimage and a Vision
Quest
it happened on Christmas the day before
Christmas I guess I got a large bag of
toys well I’ve been making these toys
all along because when you’re not riding
in cars and you’re not talking you have
a lot of time to do things like make
little toy figures out of wood and paint
little paintings and and I had some bees
actually and I could make some honey and
my mother gave me the recipe for her
sticky bun recipe and I made sticky buns
and and for Christmas so on Christmas
Eve I took a big bag and I went walking
around walking around Inverness and
point raised and all night long
delivering things I was Santa and when I
would go into some houses people would
say bring their kids wake up wake him up
wake Willie up because Santa’s down he’s
right down there right now I look like a
very different Santa than
on the packages and things like that but
I was Santa that year and it was really
a great time and then at the next day I
decided that I was going on a Vision
Quest I found myself on this Vision
Quest and I painted a poem over the next
five days or until than first of the
year and I want to share that poem with
you and the paintings
it’s about Manito manito is the great
spirit the word for a great spirit in a
lot of the indigenous cultures North
American Native Americans and I began on
Christmas Day and this is a poem that
goes over that time and so in December
25th 1973 and this is the year that I
had stopped talking so a lot of things
are happening for me I become so
creative I’ve never done anything like
this I’ve never painted and I’ve never
kept a journal I couldn’t do anything
one day at a time if someone would say
they say oh well you know John could do
that for a little bit as my dad would
say yeah my on you’re hot and sweaty
which mean that you just do something
for a little bit till you get hotter you
start sweating you want to do something
else and that’s what I was I was that my
dad was right I was hot and sweaty man
and he was from the from the islands and
Families from Antigua and that’s a whole
story in itself but on this day I began
this poem and upon the road empty sack
full heart clouds play amongst the
mountains tide rushes toward the sea
returning when whispers softly in the
trees feather dance lying on the road
one flight is done another just begun
many toll calls Manito is the rain today
wedding road and making clay Manito is
a drop on leaf enlarging worlds beyond
belief Manito is the screaming J wanting
rain to go away Manito is the flower
Manito sits upon the tree Manito rain
drips from the leaves letting go of
shape and for Manito is a endless sky
letting body feathers torn fall to earth
Manito is the tear Manito is the
mountains steep hidden by a misty sheet
Manito is the yellow gold of daffodils
as they unfold Manito also that unseen
something rather like a dream manito is
the fragrance Manito is the warming sun
gracing sky when storm is done Manito is
the one that fell passing through life’s
wondrous spell singing frogs dancing
trees Manito makes up all of these
manito is the spellcaster
Manito is a salmon strong returning here
from sea to spawn here in swishing
shallow stream where red does flash
among the green and gentle rain upon the
trees the voices of the stream of Manito
quiet voice splash manito is a great
spirit there are lots of times when I
didn’t paint anything and this is one of
them when I would just paint a circle
with a with a dot in it and and let that
circle be for one day and then the next
day I would I would paint another circle
with a dot and where was I I mean I just
I was in this place again where things
had just fallen away and I was just kind
of at one with with everything with the
planet with myself with the grass with
the people with a deer and the and that
all the little critters all our
relations and so this is the kind of
painting that I made it doesn’t have to
be a complex something you don’t have to
sit down and make a wonderful drawing
that all yes it’s it’s just to remind
you just a symbolic thing that can bring
out what’s inside you and that you can
share that with those of us around you
because we will share it I mean we will
share the piece that you have it will
become our piece and when we actually
care for each other that way I believe
this is going to change this is what’s
going to change the planet that as we
understand that we are all the
environment that we’re all the
environment and that how we treat each
other how we treat each other is really
how we treat the environment and how it
manifests into the physical world
I guess it’s easy to say if we treated
each other with love and respect
that’s how the environment would would
be treated sustainability is in our
relationships with ourselves and with
each other and I believe that
sustainability is something that we’re
going to get to through this
appreciation of being silent and being
at peace with each other
you
is a story about silence and I want to
share with you this story this journey
of silence in a way that I have never
shared with anyone before so I want to
go back to the time it was an oil spill
that happened I gave up riding in cars
my parents thought I was crazy and so
did the people in my community and they
thought I was crazy too and the the
point of not speaking was to actually
give my community a gift cuz I just kind
of talked so much you know I I spoke a
lot and about things that I didn’t know
and I just kept talking and talking and
I would get into arguments and so I
really wanted to to get out of that
place silence is something that’s not
unfamiliar to humans it started back in
well i’m sure about before we first
started talking but in the first century
AD greek philosopher Apollonius
Apollonius of Tyana was reportedly
silent for five years and i you know
what’s so great about that el
philosopher who didn’t speak i guess
that’s something that’s news and and so
he didn’t speak for five years and he
went around in greece and and he became
so famous that he could quell riots by
just showing up and and and making a nod
like you know some people were arguing
about the way a certain ceremony was
being done or a way a certain dance was
done and Apollonius would show up and he
kind of looked at him and they would see
the folly of their ways the silliness of
their of their argument and so they
would stop and it’s reported that it
even wants he called a food riot where
there were a group of people who are
holding
on to the food and they were threatening
the town magistrate who was thank God a
Polonius is here can you do something
can you say something and of course a
Polonius didn’t say anything at all
but that was the whole point and pretty
soon just because he had showed up the
people who stopped their riot and the
people who were hoarding the food
started giving it out
nothing like that happen for me because
if it did I would be there you know
there’s a lot of places where we could
use some peace but for me what I had to
do was on one the first day of the year
I decided I was going to start painting
now I’m still talking and I want to show
you these paintings no one has seen
these paintings this is from back in
1973 the first painting I ever made is a
watercolor don’t laugh but if you are an
artist and you can look at my painting
you go that it’s got a long ways to go
this is sunrise on Tomales Bay and
sunrise on Tomales Bay was my first
major painting I had a the book I use
was it oh it cost 69 cents the paints
were a 39 cent little roll of paints and
I’d gotten this for Christmas and so new
years of my new year’s resolution was to
paint every day and so this was my first
painting my second painting well keeping
a journal is a really good thing because
you get to see where you were before and
say these are artifacts from many years
ago and I get to see I get to look at
where I was before now how I used these
when I started was that I would take
them and show people and they would
say wow man that’s really nice what is
that well that was a periwinkle
I mean periwinkle you know it didn’t
quite look like it doesn’t matter what
it looked like it was my representation
of a periwinkle and that’s all I did and
that was an important part of my day
Tomales Bay my first tree this was going
along really well and then something
happened something happened in February
when I discovered bamboo I discovered
bamboo and I thought that this was a
beautiful plan and what I didn’t realize
but I discovered as well is that it was
the word was ubiquitous and that meant
that it was everywhere and I discovered
that bamboo was everywhere so I decided
that I was not going to mess around with
mountains and trees and things anymore I
was going to work on bamboo and so
that’s what I did
I started painting bamboo I would sit
down and I would sit in front of a stalk
of bamboo and I’d start painting it was
really very restful I found it was more
than restful as I started painting you
can notice that there is something about
the way that bamboo lent itself to being
painted but not all of it needing to be
painted that there were spaces that
could be represent where bamboo was but
the paint wasn’t and I started
experimenting with that that there was
this negative space this silent space
this silence
the stillness and bamboo took me on this
journey because when I first started not
speaking I thought well see this is
great this is going to help me in a way
this is going to help me learn to listen
another thing that it started to help me
realize was that when I did speak I did
speak with the gene you get that one
yeah the forked tongue there that was a
problem I had of kind of exaggerating
exaggerations going into great stories
and great stories going into absolute
lies but I did that for a reason I the
reason was I was always trying to be
someone else I was not satisfied with
being who I was I’d lost that person a
long time ago trying to be pretend to be
someone else trying to be like someone
else and for me as an african-american
you have to understand that as I was
growing up in the 50s there weren’t very
many models for me to to look forward to
you know well there was you know Booker
T Washington there was Frederick
Douglass of course there was you know
Jackie Robinson but then there was
kingfish and then there was the guys I
saw in the newspapers the pictures of
people I saw on the newspapers were
mostly criminals and so I tried to be
anything but who I was that got me into
into big trouble because I was so good
at pretending
that I I pretended so well that I lost
the person that I was I didn’t know who
that person was anymore
and so the silence that not speaking
allowed me to rediscover that
so I say all this to you now and I want
you to know that it’s all documented
it’s documented in in painting and in
writing and this is what happened after
the silence I continued painting bamboo
until finally I could break out of that
and I started painting larger landscapes
and and with words now this is eight
months later eight months after I had
stopped speaking I started writing
because when I stopped speaking at first
I didn’t write at all and how did I
communicate it was all by sign it was
all by mine and was all by acting things
out I want some tea I’m in the
restaurant and I need if I don’t want
tea I want it was very good but it
really takes two and so I started to to
paint and and write and you can see my
paintings are starting to change now I’m
using pen and ink and I’m using the pen
and I I’ve never read these out I would
use these books now I’m travelling
around in my village and up to other
villages I would use these books to say
where I had been
they were the communication and music
and so I want to read this to you I’ve
had this will be the first time I’ve
read this to an audience and this is a
picture of Inverness were where I had
been living and this is October 9 1973
sitting on a wooden bed
in front of the Inverness post office
the morning is new the Miss still
envelops the mountain across the day
business goes on as usual and a familiar
pattern unfolds as the mist disappears
the mountain calls many steps later
point raise station and Inverness lay
below in the distance paper Mill Creek
whines lazily through the meadow on its
way to the bay and the incoming fog is
held momentarily by the ridge before a
spilling through the pines now he says
almost many years ago and I’m not
speaking so this is all coming out of a
place of silence for me this is coming
out of a place where I’m just letting
myself right but I’m only writing about
my natural environment and and that’s
something another thing I have to go
through to just write about what’s going
on around me in nature I’m going to read
one more of these this is a the air is
clean and the sky is clear say for a few
high puffs of clouds on the bay the tide
moves in and the hill sighs have begun
this to sprout their winter greenery the
wind comes in from the ocean and more
clouds gather the music is here now the
mountain sings the seasons are slowly
changing while sitting on the dock and
Inverness
thank you well music has become a part
of my journey now listening to natural
sounds I’m very fortunate to be living
in this beautiful place listening to
water up against the shore and the wind
and the trees and the Jays and all the
sounds that are that are in nature being
able to hear those and and walking in in
this area so it’s a really a wonderful
thing for me but there was something
else that’s inside of me that needed to
come out and and that had to do with
with journey and pilgrimage and a Vision
Quest
it happened on Christmas the day before
Christmas I guess I got a large bag of
toys well I’ve been making these toys
all along because when you’re not riding
in cars and you’re not talking you have
a lot of time to do things like make
little toy figures out of wood and paint
little paintings and and I had some bees
actually and I could make some honey and
my mother gave me the recipe for her
sticky bun recipe and I made sticky buns
and and for Christmas so on Christmas
Eve I took a big bag and I went walking
around walking around Inverness and
point raised and all night long
delivering things I was Santa and when I
would go into some houses people would
say bring their kids wake up wake him up
wake Willie up because Santa’s down he’s
right down there right now I look like a
very different Santa than
on the packages and things like that but
I was Santa that year and it was really
a great time and then at the next day I
decided that I was going on a Vision
Quest I found myself on this Vision
Quest and I painted a poem over the next
five days or until than first of the
year and I want to share that poem with
you and the paintings
it’s about Manito manito is the great
spirit the word for a great spirit in a
lot of the indigenous cultures North
American Native Americans and I began on
Christmas Day and this is a poem that
goes over that time and so in December
25th 1973 and this is the year that I
had stopped talking so a lot of things
are happening for me I become so
creative I’ve never done anything like
this I’ve never painted and I’ve never
kept a journal I couldn’t do anything
one day at a time if someone would say
they say oh well you know John could do
that for a little bit as my dad would
say yeah my on you’re hot and sweaty
which mean that you just do something
for a little bit till you get hotter you
start sweating you want to do something
else and that’s what I was I was that my
dad was right I was hot and sweaty man
and he was from the from the islands and
Families from Antigua and that’s a whole
story in itself but on this day I began
this poem and upon the road empty sack
full heart clouds play amongst the
mountains tide rushes toward the sea
returning when whispers softly in the
trees feather dance lying on the road
one flight is done another just begun
many toll calls Manito is the rain today
wedding road and making clay Manito is
a drop on leaf enlarging worlds beyond
belief Manito is the screaming J wanting
rain to go away Manito is the flower
Manito sits upon the tree Manito rain
drips from the leaves letting go of
shape and for Manito is a endless sky
letting body feathers torn fall to earth
Manito is the tear Manito is the
mountains steep hidden by a misty sheet
Manito is the yellow gold of daffodils
as they unfold Manito also that unseen
something rather like a dream manito is
the fragrance Manito is the warming sun
gracing sky when storm is done Manito is
the one that fell passing through life’s
wondrous spell singing frogs dancing
trees Manito makes up all of these
manito is the spellcaster
Manito is a salmon strong returning here
from sea to spawn here in swishing
shallow stream where red does flash
among the green and gentle rain upon the
trees the voices of the stream of Manito
quiet voice splash manito is a great
spirit there are lots of times when I
didn’t paint anything and this is one of
them when I would just paint a circle
with a with a dot in it and and let that
circle be for one day and then the next
day I would I would paint another circle
with a dot and where was I I mean I just
I was in this place again where things
had just fallen away and I was just kind
of at one with with everything with the
planet with myself with the grass with
the people with a deer and the and that
all the little critters all our
relations and so this is the kind of
painting that I made it doesn’t have to
be a complex something you don’t have to
sit down and make a wonderful drawing
that all yes it’s it’s just to remind
you just a symbolic thing that can bring
out what’s inside you and that you can
share that with those of us around you
because we will share it I mean we will
share the piece that you have it will
become our piece and when we actually
care for each other that way I believe
this is going to change this is what’s
going to change the planet that as we
understand that we are all the
environment that we’re all the
environment and that how we treat each
other how we treat each other is really
how we treat the environment and how it
manifests into the physical world
I guess it’s easy to say if we treated
each other with love and respect
that’s how the environment would would
be treated sustainability is in our
relationships with ourselves and with
each other and I believe that
sustainability is something that we’re
going to get to through this
appreciation of being silent and being
at peace with each other
you
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