Bed Bugs | National Geographic

remember your mother tucking you in bed
and saying don’t let the bedbugs bite
before she turned off your nightlight
you probably thought she was kidding
well she wasn’t kidding it’s just before
dawn you’re in the deepest sleep you’ll
be an all night and the bedbugs are
ready to strike bedbugs once lived in
caves and sucked the blood of bats and
your prehistoric ancestors when we left
our caves so did they they sneak in
through the tiniest cracks the most
miniscule openings they even come in
through an outlet they know where you
are because they can sense the carbon
dioxide you exhale you’ve got something
they want blood when they get within
sucking distance they use heat sensors
on their antennae to find the juiciest
place to drill for plasma and expose
limb is like a flashing neon sign for a
free all you can suck buffet if nobody
does anything thousands of them can
infest a single bedroom
like a safecracker opening a vault the
bedbug finds the perfect spot to hit the
blood bank bedbugs have to drink blood
to stay alive and breed and mother
nature is on the side of the bed bug the
bug administers an anesthetic so you
don’t wake up as well as an
anticoagulant so your vital life essence
will gush freely from your veins and
here’s a cheery fact a bedbug can drink
three times its weight in a single meal
talk about your big gulp here’s
something else to brighten your day if
you’ve got a serious infestation you
might get bitten 500 times in a single
night you might get anemia unlike the
bed bug all done see you tomorrow
sucker no I guess it’s the sucker you
are the sucky