rise and shine it’s an espresso time
good morning relief nation it’s even my
one word is believe and I believe in you
I believe in that amazing gift you have
inside to you that needs to be shared
with the world so let’s start the day
off right together grab your cup of
coffee and sit on today’s message
toughen up
over to you Jordan Peters you’re
actually tougher than you think you
never knew that and maybe you didn’t
want to take on the responsibility
because you know people play a role in
their own demise so to speak when you
had opportunity to go out and explore or
withdraw because you were afraid you
chose to withdraw because you were
afraid so it’s not only that you were
over protected often it’s that you were
willing to take advantage of the fact
that you were over protected and run
back there whenever you had the
opportunity you know so maybe you’re a
kid in the playground right and you’re
having some trouble with other kids and
you know in the back of your mind I
should deal this with deal with this
myself but you go and tell your mom and
get her to intervene and you know that
that’s not right you know that you’re
breaking the social contract but it’s
easier and so that’s what you do you run
off to an authority figure and hide
behind the Great Father right roughly
speaking well the problem with that is
you don’t learn how to do it yourself so
then you have to relearn it painfully
when you’re 40 so then you take people
out you say well what are you afraid of
rank it from 1 to 10 so 10 is make a
list of 10 things you’re afraid of the
least the thing you’re least afraid of
will call number 10 so we’ll start with
that
okay well I’m afraid of elevators ok
well let’s let’s look at a picture of an
elevator let’s have you imagine being in
an elevator let’s go out to an elevator
and let you watch the terrible jaws of
death open because that’s how you’re
responding to it symbolically right and
you’re gonna do that at it at the the
closest proximity you can manage you
find out you go do that it works you’re
nervous as hell especially at it from an
anticipatory perspective shaking you go
out you stop you watch it happen and you
actually calm down you do that 10 times
no longer bothers you well what you’ve
learned that you didn’t die but more
importantly than that you’ve learned
that you could withstand the threat of
death that’s what you’ve learned and
then you move a little closer and then
you move a little closer and then you
move a little closer and finally you’re
back in what’s no longer
the elevator from a symbolic perspective
it’s a tomb right it’s it’s it’s a place
of enclosure and isolation and you learn
hmm turns out I can withstand that and
then you’re met much more together much
more confident and that’s often one of
the things that often happens in
situations like that I’ve seen this
multiple times is that if you run
someone through an exposure training
process like that and toughen them up
they’ll often start standing up to
people around them in a way they never
did before this is great line that Will
Smith said when somebody asked him what
he’s afraid of
and he said here he’s afraid of fear the
fear of fear he doesn’t like fear
whenever he recognizes that he’s afraid
of something he wants to attack it to
get rid of it to combat it to always be
pushing through whatever his fears are
because his fear is prevented from doing
great things we wants to just run
straight into fear which is such an
interesting approach I don’t think many
people have that mindset and just the
act of crushing of fear or combating the
fear makes you stronger makes you grow
makes you more comfortable and doing
other crazy things and expands your
circle of confidence and competence
the tricky part though is to catch
yourself the tricky part is to actually
acknowledge to yourself that you are
afraid of something because what we’ll
often do is just come up with a rational
reason why we shouldn’t do it instead of
admitting to ourselves that we’re afraid
we’ll come up with a justification I’m
not gonna start my business because you
know now it’s not the right time because
you know this president’s office because
whatever you come up with a bunch of
reasons and listen those reasons may be
true right a lot of those reasons have
some kind of practical value that’s why
you pick them right you’re not gonna
pick something totally crazy it’s not
gonna be you know Martians might invade
planet Earth so I’m not gonna start my
business somebody told you that if you
told yourself that you wouldn’t believe
it you can’t hold on to it so all these
practical reasons that you come up with
they hold a shred of proof and so that’s
what makes it feel like that’s the
reason but really just afraid you’re
just afraid to do something those aren’t
the reasons they’re there but they’re
not the real reasons you’re just afraid
and so patching yourself to understand
that this is the reason why I’m not
doing something
Orton is super critical I think and so
when you do catch yourself then what do
you do then you start to try to take
some kind of action for it so the
example that I told before I like to
tell is when I was walking in the street
and I had my headphones on and some
quiet Street and I’m I’m grooving and
I’m shaking I’m dancing I’m doing a
whole bunch of stuff and then I get
close to a busy intersection and as soon
as I see people around me I tone down I
start playing small start playing it say
worried about their judgment of me
worried about how they might be thinking
about me subconscious like I didn’t even
didn’t even take didn’t even register
that I was playing small right and this
is what we do normally right like
because we’re afraid of failing the fear
of judgment we just play small by
default we just resort down back to it
and then I caught it I caught it I
realized what just happened I was
grooving and now I stopped because
there’s a bunch of people on the street
that’s not acceptable and then I made a
conscious effort to dance even bigger on
a busy street corner I’m done shaking it
up now I’m not going in somebody’s face
and trying to prove a point I’m not
trying to get in somebody’s space and
offend them but maybe what I’m doing
inspires them maybe what I’m doing gives
them a bit of a smile yeah maybe they
think I’m crazy that’s okay I don’t want
to be afraid of that and so whenever I
can catch myself playing small because
of a fear then I try to attack it the
most difficult part is still catching it
and you may catch one in a hundred I bet
you I’ve already played small a hundred
times today didn’t catch any just
subconsciously just that’s how we’re
wired you play small daily hundreds of
times you don’t even notice it when you
do notice it though when you do catch it
you catch your fear get into the habit
of pushing through it get into the habit
of running towards it because the more
you do that the more you’ll catch the
next one and you’ll catch the next one
and you catch the next one
and you’ve trained yourself that when
you’re afraid of something you’re gonna
attack it now it doesn’t mean go do
something stupid doesn’t mean like go
jump out of an airplane with
parachute on okay like don’t go don’t
come you know this there has to be some
margin of safety for your life okay but
most of the things you’re afraid of
aren’t on that level you take it to the
extreme extreme example but most of the
things that you’re playing small on are
not on that level they’re not
life-threatening things it’s things like
fear of judgement and pure failure so
the more you can catch yourself and get
used to it the more you build that
muscle and here’s them here’s the brain
twist the more you catch yourself
playing small and you don’t do anything
about it you shrink to that fear you’ve
realized that you’re afraid and not do
anything about it then the more you
continue to play small the more you’ve
trained yourself that when I’m afraid of
something I’m not going to take action
when I catch myself being afraid I’m
gonna do nothing you perpetuate that
habit of playing small every single day
and so the tricky part is catching but
when you do and training yourself to
fight through it and take the scary
action will set you on a course of
insane growth will help unlock your
potential will help you do the thing
that you want to do so that you’re not
constantly thinking that you’re less
then constantly thinking that you need
other people’s approval constantly
thinking that you can’t go off and do
amazing things if you train yourself
daily the crush through fear and do the
things that you’re afraid of is what
happens your life starts to change you
know dramatically amazing positive way
so the question today today is I’m
curious what is a fear that you have
recognized today some small action that
you are not taking action on some small
thing that you’re constantly worried
about but today you’re gonna fix you’re
gonna own that fear step into it own up
to it and do something share it in the
comments below I want to see that I also
want to give a quick shout out to Jeremy
Jeremy thank you so much for figuring on
top in my book your one word really
really really means a lot to me and I
hope you enjoyed the read so thank you
guys again for watching I believe in you
and I hope you continue to believe in
yourself and whatever your one word is
I’ll see you again tomorrow morning for
another shot of espresso
be strong and very courageous be strong
and very courageous be strong and be of
good courage be strong and possess
Celaya because God knows that for what
you’re going to do it is not by outer
strength you understand you understand
sit help me preach this thing this
morning through its inner strength so my
fourth point is you got to have inner
strength for this fight it’s not your
outer strength it’s not by might nor by
power but by my spirit saith the Lord
so you gotta have that inner that inner
that inner that come strength and Delly
strengths that TEFL define come he’ll a
hawala strip that rolled me out in front
of them and I’ll preach from a chair
strip that’s an asset II to take a
lickin and keep on tickin that inner
strength that when I can’t do as I would
I’m gonna do as I can but I’m not will
stop doing to the best of my ability
ha ha ha
raise your standard Apple at the core
its core value is that we believe that
people with passion can not one drop of
myself work depends on your it’s
supposed to mean I don’t ever give up
I’d have to be dead or completely
incapacitated hey believe nation if you
want to see my all-time favorite top ten
most a success I have a very special
secret video for you these are the
individual clips that I have personally
learned the most from and applied to my
life and my business check the link in
description for details
good morning relief nation it’s even my
one word is believe and I believe in you
I believe in that amazing gift you have
inside to you that needs to be shared
with the world so let’s start the day
off right together grab your cup of
coffee and sit on today’s message
toughen up
over to you Jordan Peters you’re
actually tougher than you think you
never knew that and maybe you didn’t
want to take on the responsibility
because you know people play a role in
their own demise so to speak when you
had opportunity to go out and explore or
withdraw because you were afraid you
chose to withdraw because you were
afraid so it’s not only that you were
over protected often it’s that you were
willing to take advantage of the fact
that you were over protected and run
back there whenever you had the
opportunity you know so maybe you’re a
kid in the playground right and you’re
having some trouble with other kids and
you know in the back of your mind I
should deal this with deal with this
myself but you go and tell your mom and
get her to intervene and you know that
that’s not right you know that you’re
breaking the social contract but it’s
easier and so that’s what you do you run
off to an authority figure and hide
behind the Great Father right roughly
speaking well the problem with that is
you don’t learn how to do it yourself so
then you have to relearn it painfully
when you’re 40 so then you take people
out you say well what are you afraid of
rank it from 1 to 10 so 10 is make a
list of 10 things you’re afraid of the
least the thing you’re least afraid of
will call number 10 so we’ll start with
that
okay well I’m afraid of elevators ok
well let’s let’s look at a picture of an
elevator let’s have you imagine being in
an elevator let’s go out to an elevator
and let you watch the terrible jaws of
death open because that’s how you’re
responding to it symbolically right and
you’re gonna do that at it at the the
closest proximity you can manage you
find out you go do that it works you’re
nervous as hell especially at it from an
anticipatory perspective shaking you go
out you stop you watch it happen and you
actually calm down you do that 10 times
no longer bothers you well what you’ve
learned that you didn’t die but more
importantly than that you’ve learned
that you could withstand the threat of
death that’s what you’ve learned and
then you move a little closer and then
you move a little closer and then you
move a little closer and finally you’re
back in what’s no longer
the elevator from a symbolic perspective
it’s a tomb right it’s it’s it’s a place
of enclosure and isolation and you learn
hmm turns out I can withstand that and
then you’re met much more together much
more confident and that’s often one of
the things that often happens in
situations like that I’ve seen this
multiple times is that if you run
someone through an exposure training
process like that and toughen them up
they’ll often start standing up to
people around them in a way they never
did before this is great line that Will
Smith said when somebody asked him what
he’s afraid of
and he said here he’s afraid of fear the
fear of fear he doesn’t like fear
whenever he recognizes that he’s afraid
of something he wants to attack it to
get rid of it to combat it to always be
pushing through whatever his fears are
because his fear is prevented from doing
great things we wants to just run
straight into fear which is such an
interesting approach I don’t think many
people have that mindset and just the
act of crushing of fear or combating the
fear makes you stronger makes you grow
makes you more comfortable and doing
other crazy things and expands your
circle of confidence and competence
the tricky part though is to catch
yourself the tricky part is to actually
acknowledge to yourself that you are
afraid of something because what we’ll
often do is just come up with a rational
reason why we shouldn’t do it instead of
admitting to ourselves that we’re afraid
we’ll come up with a justification I’m
not gonna start my business because you
know now it’s not the right time because
you know this president’s office because
whatever you come up with a bunch of
reasons and listen those reasons may be
true right a lot of those reasons have
some kind of practical value that’s why
you pick them right you’re not gonna
pick something totally crazy it’s not
gonna be you know Martians might invade
planet Earth so I’m not gonna start my
business somebody told you that if you
told yourself that you wouldn’t believe
it you can’t hold on to it so all these
practical reasons that you come up with
they hold a shred of proof and so that’s
what makes it feel like that’s the
reason but really just afraid you’re
just afraid to do something those aren’t
the reasons they’re there but they’re
not the real reasons you’re just afraid
and so patching yourself to understand
that this is the reason why I’m not
doing something
Orton is super critical I think and so
when you do catch yourself then what do
you do then you start to try to take
some kind of action for it so the
example that I told before I like to
tell is when I was walking in the street
and I had my headphones on and some
quiet Street and I’m I’m grooving and
I’m shaking I’m dancing I’m doing a
whole bunch of stuff and then I get
close to a busy intersection and as soon
as I see people around me I tone down I
start playing small start playing it say
worried about their judgment of me
worried about how they might be thinking
about me subconscious like I didn’t even
didn’t even take didn’t even register
that I was playing small right and this
is what we do normally right like
because we’re afraid of failing the fear
of judgment we just play small by
default we just resort down back to it
and then I caught it I caught it I
realized what just happened I was
grooving and now I stopped because
there’s a bunch of people on the street
that’s not acceptable and then I made a
conscious effort to dance even bigger on
a busy street corner I’m done shaking it
up now I’m not going in somebody’s face
and trying to prove a point I’m not
trying to get in somebody’s space and
offend them but maybe what I’m doing
inspires them maybe what I’m doing gives
them a bit of a smile yeah maybe they
think I’m crazy that’s okay I don’t want
to be afraid of that and so whenever I
can catch myself playing small because
of a fear then I try to attack it the
most difficult part is still catching it
and you may catch one in a hundred I bet
you I’ve already played small a hundred
times today didn’t catch any just
subconsciously just that’s how we’re
wired you play small daily hundreds of
times you don’t even notice it when you
do notice it though when you do catch it
you catch your fear get into the habit
of pushing through it get into the habit
of running towards it because the more
you do that the more you’ll catch the
next one and you’ll catch the next one
and you catch the next one
and you’ve trained yourself that when
you’re afraid of something you’re gonna
attack it now it doesn’t mean go do
something stupid doesn’t mean like go
jump out of an airplane with
parachute on okay like don’t go don’t
come you know this there has to be some
margin of safety for your life okay but
most of the things you’re afraid of
aren’t on that level you take it to the
extreme extreme example but most of the
things that you’re playing small on are
not on that level they’re not
life-threatening things it’s things like
fear of judgement and pure failure so
the more you can catch yourself and get
used to it the more you build that
muscle and here’s them here’s the brain
twist the more you catch yourself
playing small and you don’t do anything
about it you shrink to that fear you’ve
realized that you’re afraid and not do
anything about it then the more you
continue to play small the more you’ve
trained yourself that when I’m afraid of
something I’m not going to take action
when I catch myself being afraid I’m
gonna do nothing you perpetuate that
habit of playing small every single day
and so the tricky part is catching but
when you do and training yourself to
fight through it and take the scary
action will set you on a course of
insane growth will help unlock your
potential will help you do the thing
that you want to do so that you’re not
constantly thinking that you’re less
then constantly thinking that you need
other people’s approval constantly
thinking that you can’t go off and do
amazing things if you train yourself
daily the crush through fear and do the
things that you’re afraid of is what
happens your life starts to change you
know dramatically amazing positive way
so the question today today is I’m
curious what is a fear that you have
recognized today some small action that
you are not taking action on some small
thing that you’re constantly worried
about but today you’re gonna fix you’re
gonna own that fear step into it own up
to it and do something share it in the
comments below I want to see that I also
want to give a quick shout out to Jeremy
Jeremy thank you so much for figuring on
top in my book your one word really
really really means a lot to me and I
hope you enjoyed the read so thank you
guys again for watching I believe in you
and I hope you continue to believe in
yourself and whatever your one word is
I’ll see you again tomorrow morning for
another shot of espresso
be strong and very courageous be strong
and very courageous be strong and be of
good courage be strong and possess
Celaya because God knows that for what
you’re going to do it is not by outer
strength you understand you understand
sit help me preach this thing this
morning through its inner strength so my
fourth point is you got to have inner
strength for this fight it’s not your
outer strength it’s not by might nor by
power but by my spirit saith the Lord
so you gotta have that inner that inner
that inner that come strength and Delly
strengths that TEFL define come he’ll a
hawala strip that rolled me out in front
of them and I’ll preach from a chair
strip that’s an asset II to take a
lickin and keep on tickin that inner
strength that when I can’t do as I would
I’m gonna do as I can but I’m not will
stop doing to the best of my ability
ha ha ha
raise your standard Apple at the core
its core value is that we believe that
people with passion can not one drop of
myself work depends on your it’s
supposed to mean I don’t ever give up
I’d have to be dead or completely
incapacitated hey believe nation if you
want to see my all-time favorite top ten
most a success I have a very special
secret video for you these are the
individual clips that I have personally
learned the most from and applied to my
life and my business check the link in
description for details
Please follow and like us: