[Music]
pain only doesn’t feel good when you
resist the pain it feels amazing when
you look it in the eye
whenever you let go of something scary
you’re only scared because your mind can
measure what you will lose but it can’t
see what you’ll gain there’s so many
things that condition you to not know
that you’re enough how about everything
on TV makes you feel like you’re not
enough believe me grab a snack and chew
on today’s lessons from a man who went
from starting to perform stand-up comedy
when he was only 12 years old to become
an actor successful comedian
best-selling author and transformational
speaker he’s Kyle cease and here’s my
take on his top ten rules of success
okay let’s kick it up with rule number
one focus on intention not goals well I
believe a goal is something you can
actually see the outcome of right like
I’m gonna make a million dollars so if
you say I’m gonna go make a million
dollars then you might actually see your
bank account change but that might not
necessarily mean that you change right
so if you have an intention that’s an
inner in-the-moment goal right and life
can mirror what your intention is so
let’s say you’re feeling off if your
intention is I’m here to grow then
feeling off might be okay right so if
you say my inner intention is to learn
my inner intention is to free myself my
inner intention is to whatever that’s
what you are right now it’s a word that
you can bring to you it’s something
that’s different many people don’t
realize they all have intentions but
they haven’t created it themselves
intentionally so they might say you know
I’m worried right now and their inner
intention might be to not have conflict
so then they’re against that worry and
they’re actually scared right so an
intention is what I like to bring with
me my intention like I actually have the
word patience on my shirt I love the
word patience like if I’m doing for
instance sometimes I’ll do a juice fast
right and I was three days into a juice
fast and I actually stepped on the scale
and gained weight and if my intention
was results I’d be really pissed because
I didn’t get any but because my
intention is patience I stay with it and
say okay I’m not supposed to just get
results in three days I’m supposed to
stay with it and then bigger results
usually show up as a byproduct of you
being that intention being that space so
to me an intentions way bigger because
you don’t know what the results are
gonna be but you change with an
intention you become a different person
you see the world differently after a
while so I don’t like goals that much
because goals are often created from you
in that egoic state you get what I mean
like in the state you’re in like
everything you’re thinking right now the
biggest goal you can see for yourself
still brings in your past story so your
past story might think I’m someone for
instance just to give a measurable thing
let’s say you’re someone who makes
twenty thousand dollars a year and you
want to create a
for next year so the biggest you’re
gonna see is like I’ll make 30,000 next
year yeah but you’re just this moment
what you and I and Oprah and Trump and
anyone you can think of we’re all the
same thing
infinite possibilities just heart lungs
potential in this moment right now and
if you undo yourself from the old story
then you can change really fast rule
number two fall in love with your fears
fall in love with your fears because the
only problem is you’re addicted to an
old story where that fear you got love
for it we go to lunch with our friend
and we talk about all our problems and
then they bond with us
think about this think about when we
were kids if you and I went to another
planet right now and we were raised by
two 30-foot tall aliens I usually say 20
but because you’re so big I made up
30-foot tall thank you
and we’re raised by two 30-foot tall
aliens and neither one of them spoke
English and we don’t know who they are
we’re just put on this planet and for 20
years we’re raised by these giant things
and one of them comes home drunk every
night and it’s just screaming a cigar
and you start to learn I better not
speak out or this thing’s gonna hurt me
or abandon me or leave me right and then
the other alien really loves it when you
tap dance let’s say well tell you that a
Liam gets all the other so you start to
learn for 20 years the way life works is
don’t speak out and when I tap dance I
get love and then you go and and
everyone has two different aliens right
then you go to the rest of the planet
and you’re tap dancing and those aliens
like I don’t even like tap dancing
that’s our parents right yeah and and
you go back to their childhood their
parents weren’t like the Great
Depression you go back ten more
generations you’re in slavery and Viking
times and none of them did the work
we’re doing right so that we’re getting
bags of all this crap from like the
1400s you know they’re like teach them
club or in the temple and drag her home
that’s the training that men parents
learn they teach their kids to survive
you need to survive don’t do what you
want to do become this become a lawyer
or this thing right and you start to
learn to joy yes so you start to go well
I want to I want to do this thing but
I’m going to lose
that I got from my parents if I step
into the great thing that I am yes so
but that they disappoint them they’re
gonna ban ye and I don’t want to be
abandoned and there was a replacement
for that which is you being the space of
love for you that you’ve never gotten
from your parents they did the best they
could that you forgive them you love
them and then you just go okay what is
it I’m scared of and I’m scared to tell
my parents that I want to do okay I’m
gonna tell me that I’m scared that I
won’t be enough and I love that all of a
sudden it feels not alone right I’m
scared that people won’t like me and I
love that people might not like me and I
love that people might be crazy
and I love that people might write me
really weird messages and I love that
people might do bazaars and I love that
but I might not be able to attract many
people mari yeah I might be broke I
might be in tote millions of dollars
debt and I love that now people might
think that’s just crazy because then
you’re just ignoring it no you’re
creating a space that’s bigger that will
totally create and take care of those
problems as a byproduct I’ve learned
that everything that I’m scared of
losing everything that I’m scared of
losing is going to have to be taken away
from me to make room for what I really
am
if someone walked by you with a glass
and they were scared to death that
they’re gonna drop it what would you do
for them like I’m scared of it right I
got it so the universe takes from you
everything that you’re scared you’re
gonna lose to show you that you’re
enough on the other side of that thing
about it right so you’re scared you’re
gonna lose money cool the universe will
make you broke so you can realize I’m
still alive I’m still here and to make
things happen I can I’m resourceful I
can go yeah a life for myself in fact
you were stifling your amazing gift
because you were so focused on what you
would lose rule number three follow the
feeling there’s always I always talk
about this but there’s two voices in us
there’s a first voice that says says
what if we did this and it feels good
you know the voice is the voice when it
doesn’t have any reason why and it can’t
tell you anything past the first move do
you understand what I’m talking about
because your mind comes in and goes well
I want to see the entire thing
so the first voice goes let’s leave this
company that’s all it can say let’s ask
that person out turn right here go to
the cabin for a while go into nature
write a book whatever it is that’s what
the voice says it’s just a feeling that
feeling we have twenty-four hours a day
and we never listen to it what if you
did meditate what if you did start that
band what if you left this band and
started the other one right and it’s
just a feeling it can’t tell you why
because you’ve never done it right that
feeling is a feeling it cannot tell you
why because you’ve never ever done the
thing but that feeling is a preview it’s
saying you know that open feeling you’re
feeling if you actually do it you’ll
always feel this way so we ignore it
usually because we’ve created the thing
that we actually pay attention to which
is the collection of thoughts that you
learn from society that tell you why you
shouldn’t and it comes up with the
stupidest reason why we should leave
this company yeah but if we do we can’t
go to the Cheesecake Factory party next
and the first voice is like if you’d
learn to listen to me you’ll own all the
Cheesecake factories in two months and
you could make them all vegan if you
want it but I can’t tell you that the
voice is like I can’t tell you that you
know why because then you wouldn’t be
moving from faith would you you’d be
moving from certainty you’d be moving
from protection will I have security if
I leave this job because you’re under
the illusion that your security is
outside of you
everyone thinks well I just need to have
security you never have security outside
of you rule number four be authentic you
don’t plan ahead so we we ought to be
right in the pocket today I feel like if
I planned ahead you wouldn’t be hearing
me you’d be hearing something I prepared
mmm and if I was doing something that I
prepared it would be because I want to
get something from someone you know we
say am I doing this right am i doing
this wrong that question implies there
is a right or wrong way and how do you
measure that like did it sell something
did people like it that I get approval
from the audience so I also feel that in
the moment we’re always feeling
something like if you just say what
you’re feeling then you actually create
a space where the person across from you
or the audience goes oh I know what that
feels like and I can connect with you
but in trying to prepare something often
we block what we’re feeling and then
brings something that we prepared
earlier in the day and people miss out
on the real you we live in a world where
we don’t say what we’re thinking we say
what we think people want to hear so if
you get into an elevator and there’s
someone that you’re attracted to that
gets on the elevator and you’re trying
to think of the right thing to say what
would happen if you looked at the person
and said I’m trying to think of
something to say to you like that’s
actually true right and how attractive
would that be if a person is I’m trying
to think of the right thing to say to
you like there’s vulnerability in that
there’s possibility they get to
co-create with you but most people don’t
say that they instead say what they
think the person wants to hear right so
we instead look at this person I go
there sure is weather outside and
they’re like yes and there was weather
yesterday too and now you’re too phony
people and this is who you’re gonna
marry that’s the world we live in right
I’m gonna marry this person after
starting the entire thing off in
authentically
so for me not preparing is so much
easier and so much more true and there’s
so many amazing moments from that right
and people go I don’t know how you do
that and I remind people well when you
go to a restaurant you don’t have a set
list you don’t sit there and think first
I’ll ask him if they have pets and if
they like ice cream you’ll actually just
say what you feel and in that space you
have a two-hour off-the-cuff
conversation so that’s all we’re doing
rule number five be in the moment like a
caterpillar if it’s a caterpillars
walking on a stick if there’s a wall
here right the victim caterpillar goes
oh there’s a wall here I’m not gonna I’m
not gonna do this right the achiever
caterpillar to make it happen motivation
caterpillar goes I’m gonna get over the
wall right that what’s trying to emerge
out of me a caterpillar goes I think
I’ll just sit here for a week and do
nothing and then it soon forms and
eventually it has wings and this thing’s
a non-issue it’s not existent mmm so
I’ve had it before where someone talks
crap about me right now the victim
caterpillar goes I’m gonna leave this
the achievement caterpillar goes I’m
gonna prove them wrong right I’m gonna
have another number one comedy special
central special and show them that I’m
but the what’s trying to emerge out I’m
a caterpillar goes okay this thing is
here what what illusion what story am I
in for this thing to even be an existing
thing and for me that shift happened
when I was comics were giving me crap
because it was this positive guy and all
of a sudden I was like I cared what they
thought about me but something was
trying to emerge out of me so I had to
sit and I sat in a hotel for a long time
and I felt all this pain in me that was
like trying to the most I knew at that
point was how do I show them they’re
wrong how do I
and then eventually ice noticed my mind
was coming up with all these solutions
but I was just sitting on a bed safe but
my mind was literally fighting for its
life for days but I’m totally safe and
we always are sitting here in a place of
thinking I gotta fix this problem and
we’re actually in fight or flight
life-or-death mode when we’re totally
safe
almost the entire life yeah so at one
point I saw my mind was doing this and I
realized I’m not my thoughts because my
thoughts are coming up with this and I
was separate from
thoughts and I realized I’m the one
looking at this and all of a sudden my
entire life story collapsed and I was
just this moment and I stared at a wall
for like five hours and I felt totally
free hmm and I realized I felt a freedom
that was even better than Who I am is
having a number one Comedy Central
special or or whatever it is I’m
actually this moment only and I felt
freer than I’d ever had been Wow and I
flew back home after that and I tried to
get my DVD player to play a movie and it
wouldn’t play it and then tried a second
when I tried six movies and it wouldn’t
play it finally the movie adaptation
played and there’s a scene in the movie
where Nicholas Cage says to his brother
he goes in high school there’s a girl
you really loved and she was saying crap
about you and you didn’t care and he
said why is that and the brother said
because whatever she says about me she
can’t take away from me how much I love
her and then he said you are what you
love not what loves you and I realized
the only reason I had been stressing was
I was under the illusion that Who I am
is what they think about me and how
could I be what someone thinks about me
what one person thinks about one person
could hate me one person could love me
there it is with me have to do it there
of crap and their childhood and their
past so if I think one person loves me
I’ve become that and then think this
person know I’m not what they think of
me I’m do I accept what they all think
of me I’m do I love them in their hatred
of me and when you go to back to your
childhood that’s who you actually are
and your natural childhood State you’re
just always you don’t care what you
don’t even know about what people think
about you and you know what you want to
be you know you’re gonna be a singer or
a dancer or a comedian yeah you’re not
thinking about well yeah but I got to
consider this or will I sell enough for
you just be that and then society turns
us into a consumer so what are natural
so that when I was under the fear of
what these people thought about me I was
under the illusion that who I was was
what they thought about me and that was
my caterpillar moment and so every time
I have any issue at all I asked myself
what Michael Beck was said is what’s
trying to emerge out of me so I’m
excited with every time I have a
conflict because I always know that only
a story is scared only an old
identification is scared
only like if someone’s talking crap
that’s only affects me because I think
who I am is my reputation but if I get
to I’m just this moment then I can
handle the lightness or the darkness of
everything that everyone else thinks and
then I can do bigger things mmm
because I’m more in alignment with the
entire world versus I’m this zone rule
number six find true happiness the
biggest illusion I’ve learned in my life
is when something happens I’ll be happy
so many people are in a position right
now almost everyone here can think when
I get that one thing when I get that
raise when I get that promotion when I
get that person to like me when I get
out of this relationship when I stop
this addiction I’ll be happy whatever it
is I’ll be happy then and I understand
it but it’s not when something happens
I’ll be happy for me anymore it’s when
I’m happy things will happen and it’s
not when I’m happy like Ned Flanders
smile it’s like when I’m okay with all
of myself when I’m okay with my anger
when I’m okay with my sadness and by the
way the only way out of that pain is
through so when that pain comes up you
got to feel it it’s been waiting to be
felt and there’s a little five-year-old
you that just wants to be accepted by
the you now and say I hear you I know
that love you didn’t get from your
parent well I love you and let that
thing feel and let it cry crying is a
good thing so many people think I’m just
gonna cry so that eventually I’ll be
happy but you’re implying happy is
better than crying and crying actually
does feel good when you face it crying
doesn’t feel good when you resist it
the own pain only doesn’t feel good when
you resist the pain it feels amazing
when you look at in the eye
rule number seven shift your perspective
my friend Diego said this once that
became something that I live by is
whenever you let go of something scary
you’re only scared because your mind can
measure what you will lose but it can’t
see what you’ll gain so if you’re sad
because you’re going through a breakup
you’re focused on the loss of one person
versus a gain of 7.5 billion people if
you’re bisexual and willing to date
everybody
so so your mind just remembers one
person but it can’t see what’s on the
other side of it and that’s no different
to me than getting on an elevator when
you get on an elevator it’s a dark
closed room just like when you meditate
sometimes your visions of what you were
disappear and you feel darkness but that
doesn’t mean because these doors are
closed that there isn’t a whole new
world on the other side about to open up
so when you feel lost you’re really in a
problem of you’re just addicted to
seeing the old story roll over eight
know that you’re enough there’s so many
things that condition you to not know
that you’re enough how about everything
on TV makes you feel like you’re not
enough how about the fact that the news
only shows us crap all day I always
think to myself do you know how not
scared of flying we would be if they
showed us the 30,000 flights a day that
made it right like with the state I
think every time a plane lands they
should interrupt whatever crappy show
you’re watching and interview every
person how do you feel if they feel like
I had a great place I was passed out it
was great yeah you’d be like I want to
try flying and they’re like coming up a
family that wasn’t murdered even
murderers would be like well if no one
else is killing people why would I
should start some company and fix the
economy right but they they scare you
all day and then they run prozac
commercials it’s crazy how is that not a
cult
you know it’s funny yes true right
morning my dad growing up my dad would
never allow us to watch any commercials
with medicine in the commercials right
any type of like drug or smoking or
drinking or anything he would turn turn
it off right he didn’t want us to be
conditioned to watching that’s awesome
isn’t thinking like it’s okay yeah so we
would all eat he was kind of knowing
I’ll he always changed the channel but
it was like the government condition
like I don’t watch it now I turn off
whenever I see a commercial I don’t
really watch TV I don’t like Netflix but
you mean like the pills that list the
side effects is so hilarious man and
it’s just it’s like every commercial
feels like a new pill that’s active like
now in this beautiful stylistic like
yeah journey were on like living this
beautiful life of like they’re showing
these people rock climbing and sail
boarding and you’re going man I wish I
had herpes have gonorrhea and this and
that yes right and I’m just I just turn
it off because I’m so conditioned to
one the more we believe that like we
need these things the more we’re gonna
have to have them right and there’s just
so many things like you said that we can
let go of these thoughts these feelings
these addictions and free our mind and
body of needing things like this so
totally I mean um yeah yeah we are you
know that those commercials are
hilarious and then they actually show
you in the commercial like that may
cause death and anal bleeding or like
yeah but my sinuses will be clear so
it’s crazy I’ll trade in death and anal
bleeding it’s a brand new day herpes
like that’s not a brand new day at all
it’s every six months I heard cuz I have
a friend that’s not me no it’s for
herpes they should use measures let it
burn oh yeah I understand it yeah but
those commercials are crazy and the news
doesn’t then they at the end they act
like they were a friend the entire time
because they tell you the story of a cat
that got stuck in a well yes every news
story ends with a cat thing I think the
news is putting cats and wells so they
can scare you for 58 minutes and be like
talk about nine lives and then they go
to the scene and there’s some woman
stroking a greasy cat we thought he was
a goner and it turns out he was and then
they come back and they’re like in the
cat’s name was lucky oh sure was Bill
and they’re sacking they’re stacking
papers but they have a teleprompter so
they also like have a side job with
Kinkos now at the end of the news and I
read oh that’s that to me is the
craziest world that literally at five or
six o’clock half of our country just
hears all the things that are going
wrong in a world where there’s a lot of
things going right and then they get
scared they feel like crap they think
they’re not enough and then the only way
to get you to cells to get you to buy
something that makes you think you’re
enough is to make you believe first
you’re not enough so if you’re not
enough it just takes Budweiser just a
little and bikini women will surround
you in a bar just do that and there’s
bikini B you need that because you’re
not enough is the belief and if you get
that you’re already love that you can’t
get love from outside of you the only
thing someone outside you can do is
trigger in you permission to give
yourself the love that you want that
nothing outside of you we are like
breathing oxygen thinking how do I get
that person’s oxygen or how do I get the
oxygen
at that new job versus kidding that you
were breathing and you have the oxygen
and the love already and create from
there and holy crap will every goal
you’ve ever had come chase you rule
number nine don’t sabotage yourself what
Martin Luther King was capable of doing
or Gandhi was capable of doing or Mother
Teresa or anyone you can think of who
did something amazing anything they did
implies you can do that and I always
think to myself what would happen if
like a thousand Martin Luther King
showed up at the same time right and
there’s 1,400 in here and all I see is
nothing but that potential available and
the only thing stopping us is our mind
goes yeah but because of the past yeah
but I’m not like that because of the
past yeah but that’s not me no if you
realize you’re just this moment we are
all the same you me Obama a homeless guy
Oprah it doesn’t matter all we are is
just heart and lungs and there’s no
better or worse than all the sudden
you’re just infinite potential at this
place you can give and receive anything
you can give and receive millions of
dollars or ideas or possibilities or
just do something creative because if
you have something massively creative
show up in your body a lot of times what
we do is we go what if I did this and
it’ll be this amazing cutting-edge idea
that could totally impact the world and
could be worth a lot of money and could
help a lot of people but you go yeah but
I wouldn’t do that and the eye is the
old story of you so you sabotage it and
rule number ten the last one before a
very special bonus clip is have fun and
what’s funny is ego also thinks whatever
decision you make is your life decision
ego creates this black or white till I
die decision versus you just having a
conversation going right now I’m just
feeling some stuff I’m not quite sure of
and living in a little bit more of a
gray possibility of love where it’s not
this way where we can’t breathe and
we’re stuck forever or this way where we
only breathe and we never see each other
you’re saying that you’re run by what
you do in that one situation with this
woman right and neither way will run you
because if you know everything’s okay it
won’t run you so you suddenly become the
space for those dilemmas to get smaller
and smaller and smaller is that making
sense thank
you doctor yeah no problem operated on
my heart so it’s supposed to be a funny
Oh God naked comedy so that’s actually
from five to six naked comedy is going
to be so I would love for everybody to
check out the illusion of their question
I’ll get the shoe on don’t worry for OCD
just everyone with OCD it’s your big
everything is not aligned it’s gonna be
the worst night ever do I tilt this
little bit
now I’ve got a bonus tile seats video on
how to not be trapped that I think
you’re really gonna enjoy but before
that it’s time with a three-point
landing questions time to move from just
watching another video to taking action
in your life or business and if you’re
feeling bold leave your answers in the
comments below here we go question
number one where do you need to stop
sabotaging yourself number two how will
you remind yourself daily that you’re
enough and number three what’s the fear
that you need to fall in love with
everything that you perceive about
yourself from your past it doesn’t exist
right now you’re just sitting here right
so if you take a deep breath you might
have these little images of what your
past story is like things that happen to
you things that you feel reactions to
whatever but if I actually realize that
everything that I think I am from past
accomplishments or future
accomplishments or that I have as goals
or whatever are not me that I’m just
this space that those ideas show up in
then often they might leave right let’s
say you have a thought no one likes me
because no one liked me at that one
thing in the past
okay who’s saying that it’s just a
thought it’s not you it’s a thought that
comes from evidence of one thing in the
past but that doesn’t mean that’s you
right
so that thought shows up and you just
let it be their one thing I love to do
with people is when they say I’m nervous
or I’m scared or anything that feels
like a negative thing I have them say
and I love that afterwards so if I said
right now I have no idea how this is an
interview is gonna go and I love that
all of a sudden I’m free right if I
think I have no idea how this interview
is going to go and that scares me then
I’m gonna be entangled right and the
problem isn’t the thought it’s your
resistance to the thought so where are
these thoughts coming from they’re just
thoughts that we have these things that
we think and usually we think that those
thoughts are bigger than us and then we
resist them
so I don’t know if that answers your
question but what I realize is that all
those things that we think we are that
feel limited you know I’m not enough I’m
not worthy I’m scared all those things
that we think we are are the only thing
we have as evidence of that is our past
right I’m not enough because that one
time
everything that comes in and hears me
say that you’re just infinite that
you’re amazing when you hear a voice go
he doesn’t know my story though my story
my past it’s not what you are if you
liked this video check out tom bill use
top 50 rules for success alec is right
there next to me I think you’ll enjoy it
continue to believe and I’ll see you
there the thing that gives you the most
energy in life is something that you
have no natural inclinations for it then go learn that
pain only doesn’t feel good when you
resist the pain it feels amazing when
you look it in the eye
whenever you let go of something scary
you’re only scared because your mind can
measure what you will lose but it can’t
see what you’ll gain there’s so many
things that condition you to not know
that you’re enough how about everything
on TV makes you feel like you’re not
enough believe me grab a snack and chew
on today’s lessons from a man who went
from starting to perform stand-up comedy
when he was only 12 years old to become
an actor successful comedian
best-selling author and transformational
speaker he’s Kyle cease and here’s my
take on his top ten rules of success
okay let’s kick it up with rule number
one focus on intention not goals well I
believe a goal is something you can
actually see the outcome of right like
I’m gonna make a million dollars so if
you say I’m gonna go make a million
dollars then you might actually see your
bank account change but that might not
necessarily mean that you change right
so if you have an intention that’s an
inner in-the-moment goal right and life
can mirror what your intention is so
let’s say you’re feeling off if your
intention is I’m here to grow then
feeling off might be okay right so if
you say my inner intention is to learn
my inner intention is to free myself my
inner intention is to whatever that’s
what you are right now it’s a word that
you can bring to you it’s something
that’s different many people don’t
realize they all have intentions but
they haven’t created it themselves
intentionally so they might say you know
I’m worried right now and their inner
intention might be to not have conflict
so then they’re against that worry and
they’re actually scared right so an
intention is what I like to bring with
me my intention like I actually have the
word patience on my shirt I love the
word patience like if I’m doing for
instance sometimes I’ll do a juice fast
right and I was three days into a juice
fast and I actually stepped on the scale
and gained weight and if my intention
was results I’d be really pissed because
I didn’t get any but because my
intention is patience I stay with it and
say okay I’m not supposed to just get
results in three days I’m supposed to
stay with it and then bigger results
usually show up as a byproduct of you
being that intention being that space so
to me an intentions way bigger because
you don’t know what the results are
gonna be but you change with an
intention you become a different person
you see the world differently after a
while so I don’t like goals that much
because goals are often created from you
in that egoic state you get what I mean
like in the state you’re in like
everything you’re thinking right now the
biggest goal you can see for yourself
still brings in your past story so your
past story might think I’m someone for
instance just to give a measurable thing
let’s say you’re someone who makes
twenty thousand dollars a year and you
want to create a
for next year so the biggest you’re
gonna see is like I’ll make 30,000 next
year yeah but you’re just this moment
what you and I and Oprah and Trump and
anyone you can think of we’re all the
same thing
infinite possibilities just heart lungs
potential in this moment right now and
if you undo yourself from the old story
then you can change really fast rule
number two fall in love with your fears
fall in love with your fears because the
only problem is you’re addicted to an
old story where that fear you got love
for it we go to lunch with our friend
and we talk about all our problems and
then they bond with us
think about this think about when we
were kids if you and I went to another
planet right now and we were raised by
two 30-foot tall aliens I usually say 20
but because you’re so big I made up
30-foot tall thank you
and we’re raised by two 30-foot tall
aliens and neither one of them spoke
English and we don’t know who they are
we’re just put on this planet and for 20
years we’re raised by these giant things
and one of them comes home drunk every
night and it’s just screaming a cigar
and you start to learn I better not
speak out or this thing’s gonna hurt me
or abandon me or leave me right and then
the other alien really loves it when you
tap dance let’s say well tell you that a
Liam gets all the other so you start to
learn for 20 years the way life works is
don’t speak out and when I tap dance I
get love and then you go and and
everyone has two different aliens right
then you go to the rest of the planet
and you’re tap dancing and those aliens
like I don’t even like tap dancing
that’s our parents right yeah and and
you go back to their childhood their
parents weren’t like the Great
Depression you go back ten more
generations you’re in slavery and Viking
times and none of them did the work
we’re doing right so that we’re getting
bags of all this crap from like the
1400s you know they’re like teach them
club or in the temple and drag her home
that’s the training that men parents
learn they teach their kids to survive
you need to survive don’t do what you
want to do become this become a lawyer
or this thing right and you start to
learn to joy yes so you start to go well
I want to I want to do this thing but
I’m going to lose
that I got from my parents if I step
into the great thing that I am yes so
but that they disappoint them they’re
gonna ban ye and I don’t want to be
abandoned and there was a replacement
for that which is you being the space of
love for you that you’ve never gotten
from your parents they did the best they
could that you forgive them you love
them and then you just go okay what is
it I’m scared of and I’m scared to tell
my parents that I want to do okay I’m
gonna tell me that I’m scared that I
won’t be enough and I love that all of a
sudden it feels not alone right I’m
scared that people won’t like me and I
love that people might not like me and I
love that people might be crazy
and I love that people might write me
really weird messages and I love that
people might do bazaars and I love that
but I might not be able to attract many
people mari yeah I might be broke I
might be in tote millions of dollars
debt and I love that now people might
think that’s just crazy because then
you’re just ignoring it no you’re
creating a space that’s bigger that will
totally create and take care of those
problems as a byproduct I’ve learned
that everything that I’m scared of
losing everything that I’m scared of
losing is going to have to be taken away
from me to make room for what I really
am
if someone walked by you with a glass
and they were scared to death that
they’re gonna drop it what would you do
for them like I’m scared of it right I
got it so the universe takes from you
everything that you’re scared you’re
gonna lose to show you that you’re
enough on the other side of that thing
about it right so you’re scared you’re
gonna lose money cool the universe will
make you broke so you can realize I’m
still alive I’m still here and to make
things happen I can I’m resourceful I
can go yeah a life for myself in fact
you were stifling your amazing gift
because you were so focused on what you
would lose rule number three follow the
feeling there’s always I always talk
about this but there’s two voices in us
there’s a first voice that says says
what if we did this and it feels good
you know the voice is the voice when it
doesn’t have any reason why and it can’t
tell you anything past the first move do
you understand what I’m talking about
because your mind comes in and goes well
I want to see the entire thing
so the first voice goes let’s leave this
company that’s all it can say let’s ask
that person out turn right here go to
the cabin for a while go into nature
write a book whatever it is that’s what
the voice says it’s just a feeling that
feeling we have twenty-four hours a day
and we never listen to it what if you
did meditate what if you did start that
band what if you left this band and
started the other one right and it’s
just a feeling it can’t tell you why
because you’ve never done it right that
feeling is a feeling it cannot tell you
why because you’ve never ever done the
thing but that feeling is a preview it’s
saying you know that open feeling you’re
feeling if you actually do it you’ll
always feel this way so we ignore it
usually because we’ve created the thing
that we actually pay attention to which
is the collection of thoughts that you
learn from society that tell you why you
shouldn’t and it comes up with the
stupidest reason why we should leave
this company yeah but if we do we can’t
go to the Cheesecake Factory party next
and the first voice is like if you’d
learn to listen to me you’ll own all the
Cheesecake factories in two months and
you could make them all vegan if you
want it but I can’t tell you that the
voice is like I can’t tell you that you
know why because then you wouldn’t be
moving from faith would you you’d be
moving from certainty you’d be moving
from protection will I have security if
I leave this job because you’re under
the illusion that your security is
outside of you
everyone thinks well I just need to have
security you never have security outside
of you rule number four be authentic you
don’t plan ahead so we we ought to be
right in the pocket today I feel like if
I planned ahead you wouldn’t be hearing
me you’d be hearing something I prepared
mmm and if I was doing something that I
prepared it would be because I want to
get something from someone you know we
say am I doing this right am i doing
this wrong that question implies there
is a right or wrong way and how do you
measure that like did it sell something
did people like it that I get approval
from the audience so I also feel that in
the moment we’re always feeling
something like if you just say what
you’re feeling then you actually create
a space where the person across from you
or the audience goes oh I know what that
feels like and I can connect with you
but in trying to prepare something often
we block what we’re feeling and then
brings something that we prepared
earlier in the day and people miss out
on the real you we live in a world where
we don’t say what we’re thinking we say
what we think people want to hear so if
you get into an elevator and there’s
someone that you’re attracted to that
gets on the elevator and you’re trying
to think of the right thing to say what
would happen if you looked at the person
and said I’m trying to think of
something to say to you like that’s
actually true right and how attractive
would that be if a person is I’m trying
to think of the right thing to say to
you like there’s vulnerability in that
there’s possibility they get to
co-create with you but most people don’t
say that they instead say what they
think the person wants to hear right so
we instead look at this person I go
there sure is weather outside and
they’re like yes and there was weather
yesterday too and now you’re too phony
people and this is who you’re gonna
marry that’s the world we live in right
I’m gonna marry this person after
starting the entire thing off in
authentically
so for me not preparing is so much
easier and so much more true and there’s
so many amazing moments from that right
and people go I don’t know how you do
that and I remind people well when you
go to a restaurant you don’t have a set
list you don’t sit there and think first
I’ll ask him if they have pets and if
they like ice cream you’ll actually just
say what you feel and in that space you
have a two-hour off-the-cuff
conversation so that’s all we’re doing
rule number five be in the moment like a
caterpillar if it’s a caterpillars
walking on a stick if there’s a wall
here right the victim caterpillar goes
oh there’s a wall here I’m not gonna I’m
not gonna do this right the achiever
caterpillar to make it happen motivation
caterpillar goes I’m gonna get over the
wall right that what’s trying to emerge
out of me a caterpillar goes I think
I’ll just sit here for a week and do
nothing and then it soon forms and
eventually it has wings and this thing’s
a non-issue it’s not existent mmm so
I’ve had it before where someone talks
crap about me right now the victim
caterpillar goes I’m gonna leave this
the achievement caterpillar goes I’m
gonna prove them wrong right I’m gonna
have another number one comedy special
central special and show them that I’m
but the what’s trying to emerge out I’m
a caterpillar goes okay this thing is
here what what illusion what story am I
in for this thing to even be an existing
thing and for me that shift happened
when I was comics were giving me crap
because it was this positive guy and all
of a sudden I was like I cared what they
thought about me but something was
trying to emerge out of me so I had to
sit and I sat in a hotel for a long time
and I felt all this pain in me that was
like trying to the most I knew at that
point was how do I show them they’re
wrong how do I
and then eventually ice noticed my mind
was coming up with all these solutions
but I was just sitting on a bed safe but
my mind was literally fighting for its
life for days but I’m totally safe and
we always are sitting here in a place of
thinking I gotta fix this problem and
we’re actually in fight or flight
life-or-death mode when we’re totally
safe
almost the entire life yeah so at one
point I saw my mind was doing this and I
realized I’m not my thoughts because my
thoughts are coming up with this and I
was separate from
thoughts and I realized I’m the one
looking at this and all of a sudden my
entire life story collapsed and I was
just this moment and I stared at a wall
for like five hours and I felt totally
free hmm and I realized I felt a freedom
that was even better than Who I am is
having a number one Comedy Central
special or or whatever it is I’m
actually this moment only and I felt
freer than I’d ever had been Wow and I
flew back home after that and I tried to
get my DVD player to play a movie and it
wouldn’t play it and then tried a second
when I tried six movies and it wouldn’t
play it finally the movie adaptation
played and there’s a scene in the movie
where Nicholas Cage says to his brother
he goes in high school there’s a girl
you really loved and she was saying crap
about you and you didn’t care and he
said why is that and the brother said
because whatever she says about me she
can’t take away from me how much I love
her and then he said you are what you
love not what loves you and I realized
the only reason I had been stressing was
I was under the illusion that Who I am
is what they think about me and how
could I be what someone thinks about me
what one person thinks about one person
could hate me one person could love me
there it is with me have to do it there
of crap and their childhood and their
past so if I think one person loves me
I’ve become that and then think this
person know I’m not what they think of
me I’m do I accept what they all think
of me I’m do I love them in their hatred
of me and when you go to back to your
childhood that’s who you actually are
and your natural childhood State you’re
just always you don’t care what you
don’t even know about what people think
about you and you know what you want to
be you know you’re gonna be a singer or
a dancer or a comedian yeah you’re not
thinking about well yeah but I got to
consider this or will I sell enough for
you just be that and then society turns
us into a consumer so what are natural
so that when I was under the fear of
what these people thought about me I was
under the illusion that who I was was
what they thought about me and that was
my caterpillar moment and so every time
I have any issue at all I asked myself
what Michael Beck was said is what’s
trying to emerge out of me so I’m
excited with every time I have a
conflict because I always know that only
a story is scared only an old
identification is scared
only like if someone’s talking crap
that’s only affects me because I think
who I am is my reputation but if I get
to I’m just this moment then I can
handle the lightness or the darkness of
everything that everyone else thinks and
then I can do bigger things mmm
because I’m more in alignment with the
entire world versus I’m this zone rule
number six find true happiness the
biggest illusion I’ve learned in my life
is when something happens I’ll be happy
so many people are in a position right
now almost everyone here can think when
I get that one thing when I get that
raise when I get that promotion when I
get that person to like me when I get
out of this relationship when I stop
this addiction I’ll be happy whatever it
is I’ll be happy then and I understand
it but it’s not when something happens
I’ll be happy for me anymore it’s when
I’m happy things will happen and it’s
not when I’m happy like Ned Flanders
smile it’s like when I’m okay with all
of myself when I’m okay with my anger
when I’m okay with my sadness and by the
way the only way out of that pain is
through so when that pain comes up you
got to feel it it’s been waiting to be
felt and there’s a little five-year-old
you that just wants to be accepted by
the you now and say I hear you I know
that love you didn’t get from your
parent well I love you and let that
thing feel and let it cry crying is a
good thing so many people think I’m just
gonna cry so that eventually I’ll be
happy but you’re implying happy is
better than crying and crying actually
does feel good when you face it crying
doesn’t feel good when you resist it
the own pain only doesn’t feel good when
you resist the pain it feels amazing
when you look at in the eye
rule number seven shift your perspective
my friend Diego said this once that
became something that I live by is
whenever you let go of something scary
you’re only scared because your mind can
measure what you will lose but it can’t
see what you’ll gain so if you’re sad
because you’re going through a breakup
you’re focused on the loss of one person
versus a gain of 7.5 billion people if
you’re bisexual and willing to date
everybody
so so your mind just remembers one
person but it can’t see what’s on the
other side of it and that’s no different
to me than getting on an elevator when
you get on an elevator it’s a dark
closed room just like when you meditate
sometimes your visions of what you were
disappear and you feel darkness but that
doesn’t mean because these doors are
closed that there isn’t a whole new
world on the other side about to open up
so when you feel lost you’re really in a
problem of you’re just addicted to
seeing the old story roll over eight
know that you’re enough there’s so many
things that condition you to not know
that you’re enough how about everything
on TV makes you feel like you’re not
enough how about the fact that the news
only shows us crap all day I always
think to myself do you know how not
scared of flying we would be if they
showed us the 30,000 flights a day that
made it right like with the state I
think every time a plane lands they
should interrupt whatever crappy show
you’re watching and interview every
person how do you feel if they feel like
I had a great place I was passed out it
was great yeah you’d be like I want to
try flying and they’re like coming up a
family that wasn’t murdered even
murderers would be like well if no one
else is killing people why would I
should start some company and fix the
economy right but they they scare you
all day and then they run prozac
commercials it’s crazy how is that not a
cult
you know it’s funny yes true right
morning my dad growing up my dad would
never allow us to watch any commercials
with medicine in the commercials right
any type of like drug or smoking or
drinking or anything he would turn turn
it off right he didn’t want us to be
conditioned to watching that’s awesome
isn’t thinking like it’s okay yeah so we
would all eat he was kind of knowing
I’ll he always changed the channel but
it was like the government condition
like I don’t watch it now I turn off
whenever I see a commercial I don’t
really watch TV I don’t like Netflix but
you mean like the pills that list the
side effects is so hilarious man and
it’s just it’s like every commercial
feels like a new pill that’s active like
now in this beautiful stylistic like
yeah journey were on like living this
beautiful life of like they’re showing
these people rock climbing and sail
boarding and you’re going man I wish I
had herpes have gonorrhea and this and
that yes right and I’m just I just turn
it off because I’m so conditioned to
one the more we believe that like we
need these things the more we’re gonna
have to have them right and there’s just
so many things like you said that we can
let go of these thoughts these feelings
these addictions and free our mind and
body of needing things like this so
totally I mean um yeah yeah we are you
know that those commercials are
hilarious and then they actually show
you in the commercial like that may
cause death and anal bleeding or like
yeah but my sinuses will be clear so
it’s crazy I’ll trade in death and anal
bleeding it’s a brand new day herpes
like that’s not a brand new day at all
it’s every six months I heard cuz I have
a friend that’s not me no it’s for
herpes they should use measures let it
burn oh yeah I understand it yeah but
those commercials are crazy and the news
doesn’t then they at the end they act
like they were a friend the entire time
because they tell you the story of a cat
that got stuck in a well yes every news
story ends with a cat thing I think the
news is putting cats and wells so they
can scare you for 58 minutes and be like
talk about nine lives and then they go
to the scene and there’s some woman
stroking a greasy cat we thought he was
a goner and it turns out he was and then
they come back and they’re like in the
cat’s name was lucky oh sure was Bill
and they’re sacking they’re stacking
papers but they have a teleprompter so
they also like have a side job with
Kinkos now at the end of the news and I
read oh that’s that to me is the
craziest world that literally at five or
six o’clock half of our country just
hears all the things that are going
wrong in a world where there’s a lot of
things going right and then they get
scared they feel like crap they think
they’re not enough and then the only way
to get you to cells to get you to buy
something that makes you think you’re
enough is to make you believe first
you’re not enough so if you’re not
enough it just takes Budweiser just a
little and bikini women will surround
you in a bar just do that and there’s
bikini B you need that because you’re
not enough is the belief and if you get
that you’re already love that you can’t
get love from outside of you the only
thing someone outside you can do is
trigger in you permission to give
yourself the love that you want that
nothing outside of you we are like
breathing oxygen thinking how do I get
that person’s oxygen or how do I get the
oxygen
at that new job versus kidding that you
were breathing and you have the oxygen
and the love already and create from
there and holy crap will every goal
you’ve ever had come chase you rule
number nine don’t sabotage yourself what
Martin Luther King was capable of doing
or Gandhi was capable of doing or Mother
Teresa or anyone you can think of who
did something amazing anything they did
implies you can do that and I always
think to myself what would happen if
like a thousand Martin Luther King
showed up at the same time right and
there’s 1,400 in here and all I see is
nothing but that potential available and
the only thing stopping us is our mind
goes yeah but because of the past yeah
but I’m not like that because of the
past yeah but that’s not me no if you
realize you’re just this moment we are
all the same you me Obama a homeless guy
Oprah it doesn’t matter all we are is
just heart and lungs and there’s no
better or worse than all the sudden
you’re just infinite potential at this
place you can give and receive anything
you can give and receive millions of
dollars or ideas or possibilities or
just do something creative because if
you have something massively creative
show up in your body a lot of times what
we do is we go what if I did this and
it’ll be this amazing cutting-edge idea
that could totally impact the world and
could be worth a lot of money and could
help a lot of people but you go yeah but
I wouldn’t do that and the eye is the
old story of you so you sabotage it and
rule number ten the last one before a
very special bonus clip is have fun and
what’s funny is ego also thinks whatever
decision you make is your life decision
ego creates this black or white till I
die decision versus you just having a
conversation going right now I’m just
feeling some stuff I’m not quite sure of
and living in a little bit more of a
gray possibility of love where it’s not
this way where we can’t breathe and
we’re stuck forever or this way where we
only breathe and we never see each other
you’re saying that you’re run by what
you do in that one situation with this
woman right and neither way will run you
because if you know everything’s okay it
won’t run you so you suddenly become the
space for those dilemmas to get smaller
and smaller and smaller is that making
sense thank
you doctor yeah no problem operated on
my heart so it’s supposed to be a funny
Oh God naked comedy so that’s actually
from five to six naked comedy is going
to be so I would love for everybody to
check out the illusion of their question
I’ll get the shoe on don’t worry for OCD
just everyone with OCD it’s your big
everything is not aligned it’s gonna be
the worst night ever do I tilt this
little bit
now I’ve got a bonus tile seats video on
how to not be trapped that I think
you’re really gonna enjoy but before
that it’s time with a three-point
landing questions time to move from just
watching another video to taking action
in your life or business and if you’re
feeling bold leave your answers in the
comments below here we go question
number one where do you need to stop
sabotaging yourself number two how will
you remind yourself daily that you’re
enough and number three what’s the fear
that you need to fall in love with
everything that you perceive about
yourself from your past it doesn’t exist
right now you’re just sitting here right
so if you take a deep breath you might
have these little images of what your
past story is like things that happen to
you things that you feel reactions to
whatever but if I actually realize that
everything that I think I am from past
accomplishments or future
accomplishments or that I have as goals
or whatever are not me that I’m just
this space that those ideas show up in
then often they might leave right let’s
say you have a thought no one likes me
because no one liked me at that one
thing in the past
okay who’s saying that it’s just a
thought it’s not you it’s a thought that
comes from evidence of one thing in the
past but that doesn’t mean that’s you
right
so that thought shows up and you just
let it be their one thing I love to do
with people is when they say I’m nervous
or I’m scared or anything that feels
like a negative thing I have them say
and I love that afterwards so if I said
right now I have no idea how this is an
interview is gonna go and I love that
all of a sudden I’m free right if I
think I have no idea how this interview
is going to go and that scares me then
I’m gonna be entangled right and the
problem isn’t the thought it’s your
resistance to the thought so where are
these thoughts coming from they’re just
thoughts that we have these things that
we think and usually we think that those
thoughts are bigger than us and then we
resist them
so I don’t know if that answers your
question but what I realize is that all
those things that we think we are that
feel limited you know I’m not enough I’m
not worthy I’m scared all those things
that we think we are are the only thing
we have as evidence of that is our past
right I’m not enough because that one
time
everything that comes in and hears me
say that you’re just infinite that
you’re amazing when you hear a voice go
he doesn’t know my story though my story
my past it’s not what you are if you
liked this video check out tom bill use
top 50 rules for success alec is right
there next to me I think you’ll enjoy it
continue to believe and I’ll see you
there the thing that gives you the most
energy in life is something that you
have no natural inclinations for it then go learn that
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