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“NEVER Take NO for an ANSWER!” – #GirlBoss

there’s a lot of man’s world out there

but entrepreneurship is a level playing

field there’s no rules when you think

about women entrepreneurs now what a

perfect time to be one we’re all going

to have these days where it just feels

like it’s too hard we don’t want to do

it anymore

and you want to quit and that’s okay but

you can’t quit or give up on those days


what’s that belief nation it’s Evan my

one word is believe and I believe in you

I believe you have Michael Jordan level

talent at something and I want to see

you find it embrace it and use it to

make a difference in this planet now I

started the girl boss series I’m

obviously not a girl but I started the

girl boss series because I believe you

couldn’t shine a light of support I want

community without bringing another

community down so the aim of this series

is to shine a light of excellence on

women entrepreneurs and leaders with the

goal to hopefully inspire a few more

girls to believe in themselves I also

want to give a quick shout out to

Alexandra thank you so much for your

help in sourcing a lot of these clips

and for your participation and making

this video happen

enjoy alright let’s kick things off with

rule number one believe with Dina habib

powell the best advice that I would

impart is to believe in yourself you

know we see so often these extraordinary

women working against odds in their

communities that are unimaginable to

many of us and they persevere they work

harder than they even think they can

they believe in their dream and most of

all they believe in their children and

the legacy they’re gonna leave behind

I’ve had more than one of them say to me

that’s what I asked myself what is my

legacy going to be and I think that’s an

extraordinary way to see the world

rule number two be yourself with Barbara

Corcoran and the only time my business

ever fell behind was when I was so busy

watching my competition I analyzed

everything I had their listings on a

chart by category by size who had one

who was my dog but the thought I was

like a genius at my field it was the

only year of my whole career I never

pushed the business ahead I was so busy

watch the next guy wasn’t watching me

all right so being yourself I would say

would be the most important thing I

forget about the female male thing I’m

not saying it’s not important in certain

industries certainly if you’re an

attorney a best friend banker it’s such

a man’s world there’s a lot of man’s

world out there but I’m

nor ship is it level playing field

there’s no rules and you know when I

find and sorry I meant to say this but I

find women can work in a real where

never mind they work harder they work

harder they just work harder rule number

three focus on who you want to serve

with Sheryl Sandberg it’s funny I don’t

know if I chose to become this kind of

leader or that I thought there were

things that weren’t being said that

needed to be said so I graduated from

business from undergrad in 91 from

Business School in 1995 and I looked

above me and it was all men and I looked

alongside me and there were all these

great women and I just thought that by

the time I got where I was it would be

half and it just wasn’t and so there

were two thin bunch of things I wanted

to say that I thought people weren’t

saying one was that men still run the

world and that’s not okay

like put a stake in the ground that it’s

not okay when I gone on a TED stage and

I said men stole were on the world

everyone gasped as if that was a

surprise and to this day I can go into

rooms and say men’s to around the world

and people like yes they do what a


you’re like guys wait you have 95

percent of the top shops like this isn’t

that hard right but the answer is why

like what are the cultural things that

are holding us back

ready men in the audience men only raise

your hand if anyone ever called you

bossy there’s always there’s always one

or two women in the audience raise your

hand if anyone ever called you bossy I

really I want everyone to turn around

so next time you see a little girl

called bossy and it will be this weekend

if you look for it you walk right up to

the people that called her bossy

probably her parents and you say that

little girl is not bossy that little


why you to wait ready I’m gonna try that

the other way that little boy has

executive leadership skills I have done

that exactly that way and gotten a huge

laugh out of every audience in every

country I’ve ever done that in but

here’s the bad news

that’s bias and if you don’t think you

have it I just proved you do because the

reason we laugh is that it’s funny that

a little girl has executive leadership

skills because it goes against our

expectation then type so in case you sit

here at the Stanford Business School

thinking that other people have the

biases that hold women back it’s you too

I laughed you laughed

it’s me and it’s you we all have the

stereotype that is keeping women from

leading and you just got through two

years at Stanford and it didn’t change

no let’s be honest that’s what I wanted

to say and then I wanted to say there’s

a whole bunch of stuff women are also

doing to hold themselves back so I don’t

think I chose to be any kind of leader I

chose to say those three things we need

more women in leadership the culture is

holding us back and there are things we

can do and again I think if you’re

looking for what kind of leader you’re

gonna be you are to inwardly focused

focus on what you want to say because it

matters or what you want to build or

what you want to make or who you want to

serve and that’s how you become the kind

of leader you are if that makes sense

rule number four never take no for an


with Gayle King can you think about

women entrepreneurs now what a perfect

time to be one I operate from surround

yourself with the best people you know

surround yourself even with people who

are better than you because it forces

you to up the game up

own game and you’re always learning

something in the process you can never

ever ever stop learning and most

important of all never take no for an

answer I ultimately believe that most

knows will eventually become a yes and

there is a way to be persistent without

being obnoxious you have to figure out

the dance you have to know who you’re

dealing with but I it just it is very

difficult for me to take no for an

answer in fact I can t remember the last

time I told you I took no for an answer

for something I really wanted for

something I really wanted rule number

five don’t quit on bad days with Nastia

Liukin it’s one of those days you don’t

want to do it right you just exhausted

had plenty of those so what did what did

it look like on those days what are you

doing mentally what were your strategies

well waking up on those days and I and I

tell kids this and not just kids but

parents because when I talk to kids

sometimes there’s parents in the room

and I’m like freeze your hand if you’ve

ever had one of those days where you

don’t want to get out of bed and and all

the kids raise their hand and like none

of the parents aren’t like okay mom and

dad I know you’ve had those days too and

they’re all kind of like but it’s true I

mean regardless of if you’re training 7

hours a day 6 days a week or you know

you work at an insurance company or a

clothing store whatever it is that your

job is or just in life you know in in a

marriage in a relationship we’re all

going to have those days where we wake

up and we just like want to say I quit I

don’t want to do this anymore it’s too

hard it’s easier to just throw my hands

up in the air and walk away and then

what I would tell myself is okay like

that’s that’s the easy way out but you

know tomorrow or the next day when

you’re feeling a little bit better

you’re gonna regret that and so growing

up my mom had this rule and this has

just stuck with me for the rest of my

life regardless of you know doing sports

or business or just in life and she I

would come home from the gym sometimes

and a lot of times in tears telling her

this is just too hard I don’t want to do

this anymore

I hate gymnastics you know I I’m in pain


I just I really just don’t want to do

this and she would say okay that’s

that’s totally fine like you don’t have

to do gymnastics anymore and you know

what it was really interesting because

she was just like okay you can quit but

not today you have to go back to the gym

the next day and the next day and the

next day until you have one good day and

of course I rolled my eyes and I would

say but I don’t want to go back to the

gym tomorrow and she was like look I’m

never going to force you or push you

into gymnastics except for today and you

can quit after you have a good day so

you know in some days this would be

three days five days later and some days

it would be the next day when I would

have a good day and because moms always

know we have a good day without even

saying anything I would come home and

she would say okay great now that you’ve

had a good day you can quit will enroll

you back into public school find another

activity that you want to do and you

know I would look at her and say I don’t

know what you’re talking about I never

said I wanted to quit so the moral of

that story for me was that we’re all

going to have these days where it just

feels like it’s too hard we don’t want

to do it anymore

and you want to quit and that’s okay but

you can’t quit or give up on those days

and and I tell these young girls that

you know it’s okay if your passion

changes because we’re not all meant to

have or love the same things right we’re

not all going to fall in love with

gymnastics and love it forever I have

this passion for it but you can’t change

your mind or quit on those days you can

change your mind and try something else

if you if you’re having a good day and

you just in your mind you think you know

what this might not be for me let me try

something else

rule number six don’t seek validation

with Sara bleakly when I first created

the idea for Spanx I didn’t tell a soul

for one year and the reason I didn’t do

that is because ideas are the most

vulnerable in their infancy and the

moment you have an idea it’s human

nature to turn to your husband your wife

your co-worker and tell them your idea

and out of love and concern oftentimes

people will tell you the two or three

things that they think maybe you should

consider and it stops people a lot of

times often right in their tracks so by

not telling anybody my idea for one year

I left ego out of it and I didn’t have

to spend the time defending my idea or

explaining my idea I spent all the time

pursuing my idea rule number seven find

your worth with the young avenge and

when we think we are unworthy it means

that for some reason we believe that we

have to prove we have a right to our

space on the planet in life as we are

being who we are and that means that we

will do all manner of wonderfulness to

prove we deserve to be here and usually

some of the common things are we over

commit over give we over do we over

excuse we over compensate and we stay in

difficult desperate hurtful harmful

situations much longer than it is wise

or productive to do so worth what it is

that you expect from the world in

response to who you are it’s very

different from value self value means

how you hold yourself within yourself

and what you expect as a result now in

order to get to the word if you’re not

holding yourself within yourself that’s

worthy then what you expect from the

world is surely gonna hurt you so here’s

an assignment for you for the next 40

days every morning you are to write 40

statements of I am I am love I am beauty

I am peace I enjoy I am power I am worth


value I am truth I am light I am well

health whatever it is I am and write it

as a noun

not as a verb not I am loving or I am

lovable I am love I am power every day

for 40 days if you miss a day go back

and do it again I am it will restore

your Worth and rule number 8 the last

one before a very special bonus clip is

look at obstacles as opportunities with

Konya King through passion perseverance

determination you can achieve anything

and recognize there’s no insect

ratification when wanting to achieve

your dreams don’t look as obstacles as

obstacles but when things don’t go right

look at it as feedback and realizing

that what you change and do differently

so look at obstacles as opportunities

rather than challenges I hope you

enjoyed i’m so honored and happy to be

the part of this video and while I was

doing the research I was hoping it you

will find something they will trigger

that fire you have inside and who knows

maybe you will be the next person to

inspire the world but you can’t be that

person if you do the work so I’m hoping

that you will let us watch the video you

will actually do something with it and

you will continue to believe I’m sending

you my love and light and go do

now I’ve got a really special bonus clip

with Justin Trudeau on how to empower

more women leaders but before that I

want to know what did you think of this

series what do you think of this video

is it helping you do you want to see

more what message resonated the most

with you let me know please write it

down in the comments below I would love

love love love love to hear from you

thank you guys so much for watching I

believe in you I hope we continue to

believe in yourself and whatever your

one word is

much love see you soon and enjoy the

the idea of getting more women in

positions of leadership isn’t just

around fairness or doing the right moral

thing it’s the smart thing to do in

leadership on boards and business and

community organizations in the home

wherever when women have equal power an

equal weight and equal leadership

influence the kinds of decisions are

better you get a more collaborative or

respectful approach and more an approach

that understands a broader range of

perspectives than the single-minded

often narrow the competitive leadership

style that are so typically associated

with the male leadership style and that

means being open to collaboration

understanding that leadership and

strength is also about seeking help and

seeking allies or not being able to do

everything on your own all the time

that’s a male way of thinking and it’s

the wrong one we need to be more

collaborative more open understanding

partnerships and the teamwork that is

going to lead to a better world that

collaboration is at the heart of why we

need to have more women empower more

women leaders if you had to think of one

word that’s most important to you that

sums you Apple that would be like a

little beacon pay believe nation if you

want to know what the most important one

word is for Tony Robbins Gary Vaynerchuk

Oprah Winfrey and Howard

Schultz I have a very special secret

video for you check the description for

details [Music]

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