clear boundaries because you don’t tell
them how to behave in your life and they
run them up if you’re being disrespected
it is your fault my dreams are first
everyday then my wife then my kids rise
and shine it’s an espresso time what’s
up believe nation it’s Evan my one word
is believe and I believe in you I
believe you have an amazing gift inside
to you that I want to see exploded onto
the world so let’s start your day off
right together grab your cup of coffee
and sip on today’s message put yourself
first over you Yan lemons and so it’s
not selfish to put yourself first
no it’s self full it’s self full self
full to be first to be as good as
possible to you to take care of you to
keep you whole and healthy that doesn’t
mean that you disregard everything and
everyone but you want to come with your
cup full you know my cup runneth over
what comes out of the cup is for y’all
what’s in the cup is mine but I gotta
keep my cup full don’t we do that don’t
we take on other people’s stuff and make
it about us when we don’t know that we
matter when you don’t know you matter
you will make somebody else’s crazy
about you you got your own stuff to
handle you don’t have to take on anybody
else’s people violate you when you don’t
have clear boundaries because you don’t
tell them how to behave in your life and
they run amok
they run amok because you don’t have
clear boundaries you teach people how to
treat you in business and in life you
teach the people around you how to treat
you if you weren’t unhappy with how
somebody’s treating you or talking to
you or disrespecting you or acting
around you it’s not their fault it’s
your fault you are allowing it to happen
you are not standing up for yourself and
the solution is not to complain about it
not to blame them not to why
about them to other people the solution
is to send up yourself and teach people
how you want to be treated if you’re
being disrespected it is your fault
learn to take accountability and
responsibility for so a quick example
one of the things for me pet peeves is
being on time mow is on time for things
and I hate it when people are not on
time for things if we have a meeting as
an example if we have a meeting
scheduled coffee meeting and you are
late I’m out if you are two minutes late
I won’t be in the coffee shop because
being on time is not the bare minimum
like you should be early I’m planning to
be there early if you’re not early
you’re disrespecting in my view it’s
disrespecting your own time but that’s a
whole other conversation you’re
disrespecting my time and I will not
have people disrespect my time and that
may mean I lose the meeting I lose the
deal I lose respect with that person
whatever you’re not going to disrespect
my time I ain’t teaching people how to
treat me when Alex and I first started
working together Alex I’m trying to
dance salsa a couple years ago he would
always be late for things 10 minutes 15
minutes not the end of the world right
you’re just him in his slave who cares
it’s not the end of the world I’ve seen
the world for me you’re not gonna be
10-15 minutes late for me now hopefully
it’s a lesson that applies to Alex and
he remembers and it’s it’s a growth for
him to apply to his own life because
showing up late for people in general I
don’t think it’s a good strategy but
you’re not gonna show up late for me and
so when Alex showed up late I would lock
the door if you supposed to be here for
9:00 if he’s not here for nine the door
gets locked and he learned and he would
knock on the door and he would message
me and I wouldn’t respond go home work
for someone else you were late and that
sounds tough but you’re not gonna be
late I’m teaching people how to treat me
I’m working with mark Drager a friend of
the channel he’s got an awesome company
called phantom media I’m working with
him on some of our rebranding and some
of our website for an advanced salsa and
we had a meeting with Mark and his team
and Alex and it’s about 10 minutes
before the means supposed to start mark
and his team are downstairs waiting and
they see Alex kind of rushing in and
alex is rushing and trying to get up
here mark says that Alex Alex why are
you rushing it’s like I gotta I gotta
get up we gotta go to can’t be late it’s
like what you’re girly you still have
ten minutes
up there and this is what I like new
standards right alex is rushing to be
here he should have been here really
should have been here 15 minutes early
but he’s rushing he’s feeling a sweat
he’s feeling the pressure hopefully
hopefully not just because I’m putting
the pressure on him but hopefully some
of that’s been seeped into himself so
he’s not late for me and he’s a he
always wants to be there 10 minutes
early but I like that Alex his standards
are greater the marks
I like that Alex wants to be there 10
minutes early when other people don’t
care as much about it you will not be
late for meetings with me or we won’t be
meeting and so take whatever the thing
is that you hate about somebody else in
your life however they are treating you
you need to understand that you are
allowing this to happen it’s so easy to
blame the other person it’s so easy to
say well this is how they are that
person such a loser
that person doesn’t respect me that
person that person that person that
person that person and it’s so easy it’s
so comfortable it’s so amazing to be
able to push off the blame and put on
the other person it’s you it’s your
fault you’re letting that happen change
it if you do not like how people are
treating you in your life then you need
to take a stand you need to take a stand
and say this is on me I’m gonna fix this
I refuse to allow people in my life to
treat me this way it’s not gonna happen
again
I’m not gonna allow it you teach people
how to treat you now I’ve got some very
special bonus clips for you but before
that question of the day what is one
thing that you will no longer tolerate
from other people in your life what is
that one thing you’re gonna stand up for
yourself now after watching this video
leave it down the comments below I want
to know thank you guys so much for
watching I believe in you I hope we
continue to believe in yourself and
whatever your one word is much love I’ll
see you again tomorrow morning for
another shock a vinspresso and enjoy the
every day when I wake up in the morning
I go into meditation and I ask for
guidance from the powers intangible
powers and I get focused I think about
what is will only today ok let me check
that off make it handle that what does
Jane me today what does daddy need today
and ok Jada before the day is done you
better make sure that you take care of
yourself and that’s a new thing for me
when you and Jaden wood first born I had
forgotten how to take care of myself
because you guys were my world you guys
were my everything you still are but I
have forgotten how to do that and at the
end of the day the one thing that I
always want to tell you well oh and the
reason why you always have to be in
communication especially with me your
family your grandmother your father your
brothers your friends the people who
love you you have to understand that
life is a journey communication creates
partnerships hmm
ok that we are here to assist you that
we can’t we can’t make your life for you
and we can’t help you with the things
that we don’t know and that you always
have to remember to take care of you
first and foremost because when you stop
taking care of yourself you get out of
balance and you really forget how to
take care of others and I think that
we’ve been taught that taking care of
yourself as a problem and I’m telling
you something about being a mother and
some of the messaging that we get in
this country about being a mother that
you have to completely sacrifice
everything mm-hmm you have to completely
sacrifice every single thing and I think
that what the the reaming at we as
mothers need to have and grab it
– is that you have to take care of
yourself in order to have the alignment
and the power to take care of others at
the capacity that we do because it fills
the well well what I believe that I do
take so much energy so much work from
heart spirit and creativity that I had
to be responsible enough to take care of
me because you know what happens
imbalance comes and you know what
happens I look to you well and I say
willow you’ve got to do this because if
you don’t you you become I start looking
towards you I start making you
responsible for my happiness and a lot
of times you know we do we look to our
men we look to our husbands and our
boyfriends and we go you I’ve given all
this up for you and you’ve got to make
this right by me and you’re supposed to
make me happy because we’ve lost our way
on how to make ourselves happy we lost
our way so what I had to do and what I
had to learn was how to get more balance
in over the years each year each day I
get more and more and more and more
imbalance more and more and more in
alignment and you know what I get more
and more happy and the very thing that I
thought would make you unhappy or make
Jaden and happier make daddy unhappy
actually is fulfilling for you guys as
well even though you might it might not
be a tangible reason but the more happy
I am in the more fulfilled I am it works
for the family and when I’m not it
doesn’t it’s really that simple
my dreams are first every day then my
wife then my kids I could take care of
my wife and my kids now would you agree
I abandoned this this is the fuel for
Who I am
I abandon this dream and then I end up I
can’t take care of them and then I’m
gonna tell them what it’s alright that
you didn’t win
no it’s not alright if you don’t win you
need to win how many of you need to win
more okay if you don’t control your
environment folks somebody else is going
to control your environment you guys
have run teams and run organizations if
you do not control your environment
someone else will control your
environment you are being controlled in
your environment right now CNBC CNN
MSNBC the parents the kids the Twitter
the Facebook the YouTube the Google the
snapchats are your environment your
friends and your relatives your uncle’s
your aunts the garbage dump called
planet Earth that you live on is mostly
if you don’t control your environment it
starts with me when I was 45 years old
my I’m gonna control my environment I’m
gonna take every penny I have all the
energy I have all the resources I have
and I’m gonna improve me if I got to go
broke in the process because I’m already
broke look if you’re not fulfilled –
you’re if you’re not reaching your full
potential every day you’re broke right
now raise your standard Apple at the
core its core value is that we believe
that people with passion and not one
drop of myself work depends on your it’s
something to me I don’t ever give up I’d
have to be dead or completely
incapacitated hey believe nation if you
want to see my all-time favorite top ten
most a success I have a very special
secret video for you these are the
individual clips that I have personally
learned the most from and applied to my
life and my business check the link in description for details