I don’t think people especially people
likely know its sacrifices sacrifice is
a big word to get to the next level
I don’t give up what anybody tells you
you have a mom hmm
Steve’s a mom yeah does your mom alive
yes thank God I should dad oh thank god
you have your brothers your siblings
yeah whether they live 3,000 miles away
that’s sacrifice absolutely you don’t
need this you don’t need on the mother
that to be sitting between a Jew and a
Cuban getting tormented North Hollywood
California to go to the comedy store to
pick up a check for $15 absolutely your
parents man your grandparents migrated
here to this country for you to be a
better fit yeah your brother became a
dentist I’m not putting your dad you’re
right not saying this but you sacrifice
absolutely you slept with James and his
apartments smelling his fat feet is that
for half here which were worse than
those Jews on the blame I never missed a
bus for six years horrifies sacrifices
motive jobs a home for Christmas
yeah and I’m working at a Hollywood gym
good night chef it bothers me that
nobody understands that I always
sacrificed yeah I made the biggest
sacrifice I looked at a five year old
little girl one day in the park and I
told her that I’m really thinking you’re
going away for a while that I think it
would be better and she spit in my face
my daughter my daughter at 27 years old
Wow
when I told her about my dream she spit
in my face on a bicycle and that was to
pick a sacrifice I made I made the
sacrifice to say I’ll give up my
daughter to do something with my life
and I didn’t go to weddings and I didn’t
go to wakes and I didn’t do a lot of
things yeah and I’m sure I’m sure along
the way I disappointed a lot of people
yeah because I didn’t attend their
wedding or whatever function they had
because they had a party after I got off
the coke like in 2009 before I married
is where this came this picture became
clearer to me that I even had a
sacrifice more hmm like I had a
sacrifice more like I went to Weight
Watchers I joined the karate with the
brothers in 2007 I was going that I was
I was four I was 380 when I walked in
there I’m a new horse stances and my
knees would burn they would make you do
these dragon stances when you drag one
foot and kneel on this one I don’t have
to go home put two bags of ice on my
knees but I knew that these were a
little sacrifices I had to get make to
get the where one of the beat but it’s
amazing that people think they’re really
gonna get ahead in this life without
making sacrifices it drives me crazy
yeah it drives me crazy got it no I mean
growing up in Flint there were a number
of obstacles I mean crazy crazy
obstacles because I grew up in them I
mean at the height of the crack epidemic
and also the demise of the auto industry
so there were two things happening at
once and they were both horribly bad I
mean I my it was like the 80s probably
late 70s all the way through the 80s
into the 90s was literally the Walking
Dead and it was real I mean you had
people who were cracked out I had
friends family who one day you know
whatever good people the next day they
were stealing everything you had all the
way to everyone you knew were losing
their jobs and it was a panic and I
remember there was two ways out and one
was through music and performing another
way with athletics but art never you
couldn’t get paid doing are you know
what I mean it was good everybody like
that’s a wonderful picture but it’s
you’re a starving artist that’s the
whole term you know and I remember just
saying okay I’m gonna do this art thing
but I had to do the football thing too
and these are my ways out now I didn’t
believe
that I was actually going to get any
kind of light as an artist but I had one
teacher one man mr. Eichelberger I’ll
never forget this and he was like I
beliefs of Terry you are an amazing
artist he was like I’m the art teacher
you’re better than me and he said you
can go somewhere with this and I was
like okay but you know nobody’s gonna
pay you know buddy’s gonna pay me to do
this nobody it’s it’s good but I I gotta
use football well he filled out all the
applications for me and I didn’t even
know why this is crazy
and he took my pictures and my paintings
and everything that I did he took and
got a photograph did all this stuff sent
him to Interlochen Arts Academy now
Interlaken it’s just world-famous big
deal big big deal arts camp up in
northern Michigan near Traverse City and
you study with people from all over the
world and he literally paint came to me
and told me he already build out
everything and he said Terry you have a
scholarship from Chrysler bull ride to
go to Interlochen Arts Academy and I was
like what are you talking about like you
know first of all I didn’t think it was
possible this is the deal there’s a lot
of things you know it’s weird because
you gotta let people believe in you but
I didn’t believe in myself and when I
got a chance to go to interlaken and
study with people from Europe and from
Brazil and from and these was mainly
music students and then add art students
and it was just as like and covered from
Flint I mean coming from the hood and
then once this changed my life once I I
remember we had an and it was really big
on competition very very big on
competition it was like if you were a
violinist you had to be the first chair
and second chair and I remember all
these kids were disappointed cuz they
kept moving down and it would just feel
like they were crushed and the same
thing with art they gave us to paint we
had to do two drawings and we had a
class doing all these drawings and they
said put those drawings on the wall and
don’t put your name on them we have the
this the sky coming from from the
Cleveland Institute of Art he’s gonna
judge each painting and we want to see
who’s the best and I was like oh man you
know and so I did my deal and I put all
it was a wall full of art and the the
the art guy pointed at mine and he said
that one’s the best one then he went all
the way across the room and he said that
one and they were both mine now life is
a confidence game you know but that
would let me know I was like walking I
can do it I can do like really is good
these people this is all over the world
and then I got a scholarship to Western
Michigan University in art I had a
problem where I had this dream I thought
the easy part would be getting to Bill
Gates the hard part I figured was
getting the money to fly there I was
buried in tuition payments I was all out
of Bar Mitzvah cash some quick money so
two nights before final exams my
freshman year of college I find tickets
the prices right yeah hey my first
thought is you know what if I go on the
show and win some money to fund this
dream yeah you know not my brightest
moment but I had a problem I never seen
a full episode of the show before I only
seen bits and pieces so that night had
decided to do the logical thing and pull
an all-nighter to study okay but I
didn’t study for finals I stud had to
hack the prices right and I went on the
show the next day and did this
ridiculous strategy and ended up winning
the whole showcase showdown winning a
sailboat selling so much and that’s how
I funded the buck wisdom acquisition was
a moral duty it’s not something you do
just to advance in life
wisdom acquisition is a moral duty and
as a corollary to that proposition which
is very important it means that you’re
hooked for life time learning and
without lifetime learning you people are
not gonna do very well you are not going
to get very far in life based on what
you already know you’re going to advance
in life by what you’re going to learn
after you leave here if you take
Berkshire Hathaway which is certainly
one of the best regarded corporations in
the world and may have the best invest
long-term investment record in the
entire history of civilization the skill
that got Berkshire through one decade
would not have sufficed to get it
through the next decade with the
achievements made without Warren Buffett
being a learning machine continuous
learning machine the record would have
been absolutely impossible the same is
true at lower walks of life I constantly
see people rise in life we’re not the
smartest sometimes not even the most
diligent but they are learning machines
they go to bed every night a little
wiser than they were when they got up
and boy does that habit help
particularly when you have a long run
ahead of you want to be around people
that somehow give us the sense like I
when I’m around that person I don’t know
they just I just feel better they make
me better somehow let’s say it’s you and
me and
what I want to feel from you is that
you’ve got my back you understand me and
that when you’re making decisions it’s
not just for you it’s for me as well and
so a rising tide floats all boats the
relationships that go wrong or sour is
if I’m on the side of this relationship
I’m like do I trust that he’s making
these thoughts or moves because it’s
right for him or me
and though thus our relationships are
the one where it’s really just good for
you and I’m just casualty in your in
your experience so what we do a head of
time is we invest in the relationship so
for example the Seattle Seahawks the
product is football so just like a
business you’ve got products for your
businesses as well and but we are
relationship based organization is if
coach Carroll was here he’d say that’s
how we run the organization a
relationship based organization and the
output is football and that we found
that to be incredibly valuable because
we don’t do none of us do this thing
alone and if we’re really going to go
the distance and really step in to the
frontier to do the amazingly difficult
challenging things we need to lock arms
to stay in the trenches long enough and
what happens for most people is we lock
arms we say oh yeah let’s go get it and
then we lock arms and as soon as it’s
hard the brain kicks in and it’s the
survival mechanisms in the brain are
stronger than the thriving mechanisms so
the survival mechanisms are very light
up and what do we do we save our own s
and we unlock our arms and we take care
of ourselves that is how people fray in
rugged and stressful environments
emotionally stressful environments we
unlock and so the extraordinary able to
stay the course locked arms because
their mission minded they’ve they’re
really clear about what they want to
experience and they bet on each other I
think success first of all is knowing my
purpose in life as I have watched and
observed successful people what I have
discovered about them is they really
have figured out why they’re here they
really do have their act together and
and knowing their purpose in life
is a stability for them so that when
everyone else is rocking and rolling and
and and and things are a little unsteady
and people are kind of leaving the ship
and people are kind of abandoning their
causes with these people they hold
steady right throughout the storm
because they they have a true Northstar
they truly are focused it becomes an it
comes an anchor in their life that just
holds them steady and the anchor is a
confidence based upon a knowledge of
purpose and there are a lot of people
from whom we can learn a lot and I think
like you know the one piece of advice is
like don’t underestimate anyone you come
across a fright like whether they’re you
know a blue collar worker waiting for
the bus or they’re you know helping you
at your they’re the server a bartender
at the restaurant or they’re a
lower-ranking employee I mean the
smartest leaders I’ve ever seen have
always gone around the room and asked
for everybody’s opinion I don’t pay no
attention to what they say about me all
I do is just do what I have to do and
get paid and that’s it but I don’t
really pay no attention to the rules of
boxing I don’t pay no attention I defy
all the rules I define I’ve added pages
to the book of boxes the world is a
hurting place and the world needs hope
and the world needs love without hope we
feel like why are we here well
brokenness here’s mine today I still
have no arms or legs but everything’s
changed everything for me I was looking
for hope and happiness and I couldn’t
see it for many years in fact if this
side of the table represents my hope
truth encourages me to become all that I
can be but then we have lies every day
coming in our mind
people who discourage us you know the
people that you have in your life who no
matter how good of a day you’re having
they’ll bring you down or and no matter
how bad of a day you’re having they’ll
bring you even lower you know what I’m
talking about
think of the three biggest discourages
in your life they’re not your biggest
discourages you are you are it only
takes three seconds for me to tell you
something discouraging but then you may
never forget my words well you have to
treat yourself like you matter because
if you don’t then you don’t take care of
yourself and you become vengeful and and
and cruel and you you take you take it
out on people around you and you’re not
a positive force none of that’s good
so you suffer more and so does everyone
around you and there’s a malevolence
that enters into it none of that’s good
so that’s what happens if you don’t
treat yourself like you matter and then
what happens if you don’t treat other
people like they matter
well you lie to them you cheat them you
steal you you you enter into impulsive
relationships with them they can’t trust
you that doesn’t go anywhere they don’t
like you you you end up alone at best
and maybe like a incarcerated at worst
like that doesn’t work and so you watch
the people around you who thrive
regardless of what they say they act out
the proposition that everyone matters
and then you have a functional Society
and I think okay well if if if when you
act out the proposition that everyone
matters you have a functional society
maybe that’s evidence that that
proposition is true it’s like I think
it’s I think it’s true and I got can’t
stress this enough choosing your
partners has got to be maybe the most
important decision you’ll ever make
whether you know personally and love or
otherwise in business
you can change your idea you can pivot
your company you can’t change your
partners without starting over and so I
see so many people rushing into these
relationships I mean you should really
give that a lot of thought this is
something that hopefully will last years
when you know a lot of corporations have
they might call them core values or
guiding principles or so on but the
problem is usually they’re very lofty
sounding they kind of read like a press
release the marketing department put out
they sound just like their competitors
and maybe you learn about it on day one
of your job but then it becomes this
meaningless plaque on the lobby wall
well we wanted to come up with
committable core values and by
committable meaning we’re willing to
hire or fire people based on those
values completely independent of their
actual job performance everyone has a
problem with time but today is 24 hours
and we sleep 6 now I know there’s some
out there that say I need eight
but I say to sleep a little faster
because the bottom line is we have six
hours of sleep 24 hours are available so
if 18 hours now available to your work
your family your hobbies and also to
learn something new or to do something
new which could easily be that you want
to learn a new language or that you want
to read and as a New Year’s resolution I
have to read a book every week or where
you say I’m gonna go and reshape my
party so you’re gonna go and take this
hour out of your schedule and say I’m
gonna train an hour every day so this is
for most people a huge challenge but it
is totally doable I can tell them
because the kind of things that I did
when I came to this country I mean I
went to school I was working on
construction I was working out my 5
hours a day I was taking acting classes
from 8 o’clock at night to 12 midnight I
was doing all of those things I wanted
to make sure that out of the 24 hours of
the day that I don’t waste one single
hour those hours were too precious and
so they’re just want to tell people
don’t give me this thing I have a
difficult time at the time and I don’t
have time for this none of that you have
time
you make the time so I kind of like half
jokingly with with a lot of people say
that you know my job is basically like
to be to be the assistant for the rest
of the company like my job is to make
sure that like you have what you need
that it’s and basically you have
everything you need to kick ass like
that’s my job if you don’t have that
then let me know cuz I’m not doing my
job so many things go wrong when you’re
starting a company and often I think
people ask you know what mistakes should
you avoid making and you know my answer
that question is don’t even bother
trying to avoid mistakes because you’re
gonna make tons of mistakes right and
the the important thing is actually
learning quickly from whatever mistakes
you make and not giving up right and I
mean there are things every single year
of Facebook’s existence that could have
killed us or made it so that it just
seemed like moving forward and making a
lot of progress just seemed intractable
but you just kind of bounce back and you
learn and nothing is impossible you just
have to kind of keep running through the
walls what I see right now is people
wrap up their sense of success and
identity with their prowess and
fundraising and comparing themselves
against how their peers are doing I
think that’s really the wrong way to
look at things and it leads to kind of
non optimal outcomes for instance I
don’t know if the valuations that
companies are getting today is
necessarily healthy for the company
themselves and for us again you know our
inability to raise capital actually
forced us to be very disciplined in how
we think about the operational metrics
of the company and that’s allowed us to
you know be pretty successful to try and
be decisive I try and even if I don’t
know what the hell I’m doing I try to be
decisive because I think it’s very
comforting and reassuring and important
to the people that work with you to feel
that whoever is in charge knows what
they’re doing and knows what they’re
thinking and that if it’s a yes it’s a
yes and it’s a no it’s a no
I mean I don’t think of myself as a boss
I mean I I think of myself as someone
who’s giving direction and guidance and
vice versa
I find that levels of success in almost
any industry or area correlate to a
person asking great questions in some
cases they seem absurd in fact the
hallmarking way of great questions is
that sound completely ridiculous so
someone might ask like Peter Thiel why
can’t you achieve your ten-year goals in
the next six months there’s a thought
exercise that’s like–that’s that’s a
good question to answer for yourself and
these types of questions come up
surprisingly often with with very very
impressive folks whether it’s in
business military entertainment or
otherwise and the way you can get better
at questions is by studying interviews
in part so I studied Larry King I
studied Charlie Rose I studied Terry
Gross I studied that that go down the
list
I studied twenty Robbins who does
in-person one-on-one interventions at
his events in front of ten thousand five
thousand people and he’s just genius
with how he uses questions to like
pattern interrupt and grab someone’s
attention and divert them in a more
productive productive direction now why
is that relevant relevant because
thinking is the process of asking
questions you’re asking yourself
questions then you’re answering them in
your own head so if you get better at
asking other people questions you get
better at asking yourself questions
which means you are a you’re improving
your thought performance and level of
thinking from the time I was seven years
old every Saturday I would go for four
hours of acting class every Saturday
whoa and I loved it
I just left till the point with all the
kids graduated and went on to the other
stuff and I started doing adult acting
classes and then I was in the commercial
classes and then I loved like the hair
and makeup classes
just everything I just couldn’t go
enough and you know what everybody wants
to hear what they already believe to be
true and so the last thing they want to
hear is an original idea that
contradicts their belief system so it’s
very hard to even bring that kind of
stuff up but those are the things those
are the only things things that you
believe that everybody around you
doesn’t believe when you’re right that
create real value in the world
everything else people already know
there’s no value created it’s just
business as usual so it’s so important
to think for yourself compassion for
yourself of course it’s as important as
compassion for others when often I get
asked questions like people who did
something that they now realize realized
was deeply wrong in the past sometimes
people ask questions about they brought
up their children in a way that they now
realize was not very conscious and so
that they may have caused suffering to
their children or other people find they
have caused suffering to loved ones and
they now realize that what they did was
wrong and again I say this is an example
where you need to be compassionate with
yourself because nobody woman being can
act beyond their level of consciousness
so that was your level of consciousness
at the time and you could not go beyond
that and again here to make demands upon
yourself up to a point it might be a
good thing to butcher if you as long as
you enjoy it it’s a wonderful thing when
the enjoyment of what you’re doing is
lost then you have to be careful because
there you have to come to a stop and say
okay this there’s something here that’s
not right because I’m no longer enjoying
what I’m doing you already know who you
are and that piece that piece that we’re
after lies somewhere beyond personality
your need for acceptance
can make you invisible in this world
don’t let anything stand in the way of
the light that shines through this form
risk being seen in all of your glory so
just go and do it
try learn from it you know you’ll fail
at some things that’s a learning
experience that you need so that you can
take that on to the next experience and
don’t let people who you may respect and
who you believe know what they’re
talking about don’t let them tell you it
can’t be done because often they will
tell you it can’t be done and it’s just
cuz they don’t have the courage to try
it Ben Graham in his low in his low
teens looked around and he looked at the
people he admired and he said you know I
want to be admired so why don’t I just
behave like them and he found there was
nothing impossible about behaving like
them and similarly he did the same thing
on the reverse side in terms of getting
rid of those qualities one of the things
I advise entrepreneurs to do is when you
have an idea a classic entrepreneurial
impulse is to hold the idea close to you
and not go tell you because all the
ideas so special
right that’s almost always a mistake go
talk to why is that a mistake it’s a
mistake because your actual real
competitive advantage is not that you
have this idea that you have locked away
in your closet which may or may not be
accurate and you have no idea which it
is your actual competitive advantages if
you’re assembling the intelligence
around does this idea work what is the
right team what is the right learnings
and where essentially and most go talk
to people who failed at what you’re
doing and who are no longer doing it
there always are those people so you
started to start up you know you look at
the history of your space I’m so
surprised how many people I talk to
centers who have no idea the history of
their own space and
there’s some night there’s some nice and
naivete to that in the sense that like
well you’re gonna do differently and and
there’s some truth to that but like when
you get down to to making it work and
now you’re into it already you’ve kind
of stylish what you’re doing and you
have some problems then I’d go talk to
all these people who failed because
you’ll uncover all sorts of interesting
things you could try how do you think
about making a decision when everyone
tells you this is a crazy idea where do
you get the internal strength to do that
oh well first of all I’d say I actually
think I feel feel fair quite strongly so
it’s not as though I just have the
absence of fear I’ve I feel it quite
strongly but yeah there were times when
something is important enough you
believe it enough that you do you do it
in spite of the fear
so speaking of important things like
people shouldn’t think III I should
think well I feel fear about this and
therefore I shouldn’t do it
it’s normal to be to feel fair like
you’d have to definitely something
mentally wrong you shouldn’t feel fair
so you just feel it and let the
importance of it anyway yeah you know
actually something that can be helpful
as fatalism and some degree if you just
think it’s just accept the probabilities
then that diminishes fear so my starting
SpaceX I thought the odds of success
were less than 10% and I just accepted
that actually probably I would just lose
lose everything
but that maybe would make some progress
if we could just move the ball forward
even if we died maybe some other company
could pick up the baton and move and
keep moving it forward so that were
still decent good
yeah stay with Tesla I thought the odds
of a car company succeeding were
extremely low when you start with a your
company you’re gonna have a lot of
anxiety and stress and fear and your job
is to transform that into
self-confidence and to give you kind of
that you know the ability to say I have
clarity I trust myself I have a feeling
for my vision I can see that happening I
work with entrepreneurs all the time
that kind of shift from you know anxiety
to trust that’s the most important thing
that they can go through and so I think
when you are starting a new business you
uh you don’t want to go after giant
markets you want to go after small
markets and you want to take over those
markets quickly what this all comes down
to is doing something exceptional for
your users whether it’s in community
whether it’s in connection or whether
it’s in design this is our big advantage
as a startup is that we can actually get
away with doing this we can make this
the core part of why we’re doing
business I do believe that organizations
human organizations are inherently
unstable they will fall over and you
have to work to keep them upright but
they fall slowly most people don’t
notice it they let their success they
blind them they don’t see it falling
over the following takes place low but
the collapse is quick you have to do
constant assessment you have to look for
the hard truths don’t necessarily think
that you have to have the homerun in the
huge Apple Computer on your first start
I spent a long time in my life with
skills just building little devices for
fun for fun is one of the key things
because that drives you to think and
think and think and make it better and
better and better than you ever would if
you’re doing it for a company build
things at first for yourself that you
would want if you’re not coming up with
ten ideas a day that’s
this thing I’m not coming up when I’m
filling up this page every single day
then my idea muscle will atrophy and I
started this in 2001 and I still do it
every single day like you have to come
up with ideas every single day or the
idea muscle atrophies the good news is
after about six months of doing that
you’re like a machine like people get
surprised at how many ideas you could
just have any like me have to do
everything three times before we get it
right thankfully I know that so I know
that I have to get up early and and try
it five times because the eight-year-old
will be able to get past it in two times
so I have to be on my feet longer but at
least I know it and so I just go at
stuff and it served me very well and
that my resume is pretty varied and I
have a pretty interesting life you’ll
get to do different stuff and have a bit
of access because I just said yeah I’ll
try that I mean why would I hold back as
soon as we I got off the phone call with
him and then also when he said it’s not
in the picture now but we think I think
it’d be great at Dallas dance at the end
and my heartbeat went up on the phone
and I started breaking the cold sweat
like oh no I did that’s not and as soon
as I would all know that’s not that the
other other devil in my ear said dare
you do and I just meant of course I
think it’s yes because I immediately
notice if you don’t you listen out dude
are you kidding me you will forever
regret you have to so as soon as that
got over that I was like well that’s
inevitable I’m doing it mmm now I gotta
bust my ass to go do it the best I can
and a lot of fear that mmm I mean that
was yeah that was some major really good
anxiety and fear and then now we’re
saying now I’m saying by that time now
everything my choice is from that phone
call long work anything I was nervous
but you have to go no don’t go all I go
meet midnight
yes can y’all meet him for another Korey
choreographed session hey a.m. Sunday
morning do you got an hour
I’m gonna go send them here my wife’s
over there watching reading something
I’m standing the mirror I’m a practice
of move this is really embarrassing well
too bad man
in the mirror right now because the less
embarrassing that gets hopefully the
more comfortable you’ll be when you’re
out there in front of 80 people and let
your cameras and one thing you do when
you go out there don’t come up short yo
go all the way you know one way to
conceptualize what makes a good product
is you know good engineering is part of
it good design is part of it but really
it’s one way I think about it at least
is maximizing the probability that
someone shows up at the front door of
you know your store or your website or
or whatever it is and ends up with a
solved problem and oftentimes the best
methodology is to start with the perfect
experience with just one person get that
right and then figure out how to scale
something great instead of scales I mean
not so great and then trying to improve
it that’s really hard to do I’ve learned
an experience is that you know if you
don’t open up and you don’t delegate
then you’ll kill yourself and if there’s
one thing that I’ve managed to
understand is the art of delegation
because if I can pass on you know to
Claire Smith to areum
my palette my understanding my knowledge
then grab it run it and then pass on to
your team don’t hold that inside I was
with a bunch of other investors who I
respect and they brought me a deal and I
wanted to be part of it but it didn’t
feel right
and I wrote millions of dollars on that
one and it just didn’t feel right and I
lost it all within two years associate
investors Dressler got dinner
absolutely and trust you well what about
you said earlier don’t be emotional and
sometimes the gut know this this is a
barometer of risk it’s something an
internalized for an investor that says I
don’t feel comfortable
it’s not about emotions just don’t write
that check that was recently the first
time I didn’t listen to that and I lost
everything
so now my radar is up I listen to my gut
it’s not an emotion it’s an index of
risk and you get it as you age you
become a better investor every year if
only I could live to 200 I’d be really
good many many kids and many grown-ups
do figure out over time what their
passions are and sometimes we let our I
don’t think it’s that hard I think what
happens though sometimes is that we let
our intellectual selves overrule those
passions and so that’s what needs to be
guarded against if you’re not utilizing
an online community then you’re at a
disadvantage to those who are you can be
asking online communities what they
think about your ideas or if they have
any advice with what you’re working on
not only will you hear from people who
are passionate about the subject but
you’ll be hearing from people all around
the world each with their own
experiences and stories that can help
you I looked at lots of companies and
why I thought they don’t succeed over
time we’ve had a more rapid turnover of
companies so what did they fundamentally
do wrong
like one of those companies all do wrong
and they usually it’s just they missed
the future and so I think for me I just
tried to focus on that and say what does
that future really gonna be and how do
we create it that whatever you do
somebody can do it better you have to
bring your a-game in every single day
there’s nothing unique about any one
individual what’s unique is their
passion their ability to execute to meet
targets and exceed them the minute you
lose that ability in capitalism you’re
gone it’s a fair trade the engine that
makes you rich can take it all away from
you there are no guarantees I think
that’s incredibly important so the most
important part of getting to a goal is
to start feeling it now is to start
acting as if right if you want to be
that leader if you want to be that
author if you want to be that painter
all it takes is one action and you truly
are in the process of becoming it so
it’s funny that I am literally basically
done with the book and I’m like can I
call myself an author yet I’ve written a
book of course because you have taken
the action you’re doing the actions
there is no final anointing of anyone
there’s no ceremony there’s no fireworks
you just start acting as if and feeling
it and envisioning it and picturing it
and soon enough you become it right so
everybody starts somewhere so whether
you are a famous ballerina or an Olympic
swimmer they all started somewhere they
all had to take that first class they
all had to take that first leap into the
water right and at what point can you
start calling yourself a swimmer a
dancer an author it’s the second that
you start taking action and you start
thinking it and you’re feeling it right
it’s about embodying it so my biggest
tip for you is to start seeing yourself
as that person and start taking the
small actions of being that person that
you want to be that’s the only thing
that is separating you from actually
being it so you have to act as if in
order to really start getting that ball
rolling and all of a sudden you are well
from being in the visualize where you
want to be and what you want to
accomplish you kind of get lost in the
process of day-to-day you know grinding
it out and working pulling on ours if
you have to you know that this is just
about not losing vision and not losing
sight of what you’re what you’re trying
to accomplish no matter what hurdles you
have to go through so I think that kind
of relates it with whatever you’re doing
whatever you know major you’ve chosen
what you’re interested in so for me and
basketball and it’s about you know
visualizing whether you write it down
and put it on the wall do something with
what your goals are and get lost in the
process of day-to-day grind day to day
getting better every single day asking
questions aligning yourself with people
that have been through it before that
that are experienced and leaning on that
advice and just trying to outwork the
next person and that’s the biggest thing
has acting turned out to be all that you
wanted it to be it’s incredible
it’s incredible you know I I never knew
that I could do it as a career I never
knew it was the first memory that I had
it’s the first thing I can think of as
saying I want to be an actor to my
parents and if I hadn’t lived in Los
Angeles and been in such close proximity
to sort of the mecca of moviemaking
if I didn’t have parents that said okay
we’ll drive you to auditions we didn’t
have the economic means to you know move
camp from Idaho to Los Angeles because
some snotty ten-year-old kids is how
I’ve been acting
we did it after school I got to go on
auditions but it was always and I’ve
said this before it felt like an elite
group of people and it felt like I would
never belong to them so once I got the
opportunity to to for example get the
movie this boy’s life with Robert De
Niro I said Wow
now I’m able to not be able to steer the
course of my career I might be able to
have a career similar to these guys that
I’m you know I so admire and that I knew
at 15 years old was the biggest gift in
the world and that that’s that’s never
left me you know I’ve never I’ve never
that that thirst or that hunger for
wanting to give one great performance
that I’m truly satisfied with or being
one movie that I said I love this film
is something that I don’t know will ever
be quenched I don’t know and that’s I
think that that’s a good thing because
it keeps making it keeps pushing you you
know cuz it’s constantly dissatisfied in
other words so when we see a kid with a
lemonade stand it’s different than when
we see a vending machine selling
lemonade even if it’s exactly the same
product because the story around it is
what people are paying for so when I
meet small business people all I ask
them is not what’s their balance sheet
but what’s their story why should I pick
you why do I care about what you’re
doing and if you start giving me all
this inside baseball statistics about
why you’re 2 percent better than some
other competitor I’m already glazed over
because that’s not part of the way I see
the world there’s a lot of conventional
wisdom out there built up over time and
built through all the learnings from all
the companies
and this may be fully applicable to most
of the companies out there but before
it’s applied to your organization I
highly recommend that you question it
because it could be absolutely fatal for
your success once you have the passion
and thing that you’re passionate about
now you can look at other people or
other entities or other things or works
of art you can draw things from that to
help you be better at what you buy
looking for those common denominators so
I wanted to know how do I prepare her
how do I prepare how do I study how do I
view the game how do you build your game
and my response is much like the way he
builds products and you think
sequentially oh yeah you look at this
the end result of what you want to
create but in order to create that
there’s so many other little things that
go into this massive entity that device
it’s no different than building my
basketball game you start with what do
you want your game to be will we make
your game most unstoppable or hard to
deal with and now you work backwards
from there and you start building it one
piece at a time one move at a time one
countered there’s a lot of similarities
there but what you really need to do is
think about what is the smallest
possible test that I can run for this
idea for this concept for this theory
get it out there and get customers using
it because your customers are gonna be
the ones to tell you if it’s really
working or not try to do something that
you would want to do anyway whether it’s
it doesn’t necessarily have to be a very
successful business because when you do
decide to become an entrepreneur and
start a business chances are it’s not
gonna
dude it’s not gonna become like a
multi-million dollar business so at
least do something that you love in the
beginning so that even if it fails you’d
still enjoy it I think great
entrepreneurs must have the curiosity to
to kind of metaphorically see around the
corner what’s coming
what can I anticipate that other people
don’t see and then you must have the
courage of your convictions to execute
the strategy you want an idea about what
you can say I know it sounds like a bad
idea but here’s specifically why it’s
actually a great one you want to sound
crazy but you want to actually be right
because when you’re trying to
differentiate when you’re trying to do
something different there’s going to be
that gut moment that gut sense is this
right is this not right if you’re not if
you’re not having doubt you’re not
pushing the boundaries far enough the
definition of values is they’re the
behaviors or principles that you
religiously adhere to within your
company
when I say religious I mean that no
amount of data will sway you in it from
from those principles and the degree to
which that you have the courage to
maintain your conviction around those
ideas is the degree to which you’re
going to be successful over the long
term most startups that fail do it
ultimately because they did not make
something that people wanted they made
something that
you know that they thought people would
want but they were either in denial
about it about you know whether it was
actually any good or somebody else came
along and made something that people
wanted even more and so it’s not just
about doing focus groups it’s not just
about you know double-checking your
vision it really is about integrating
this concept of testing our ideas
rigorously throughout the product
development process out the marketing
process even as we scale the hardest
thing to do is start you have all these
ideas and everyone has an idea it’s
really about executing the idea and
building the idea and attracting other
people to help you work on the idea that
is the biggest challenge but the way to
begin is to get the idea out of your
head draw it out you know talk about it
program it if you’re a programmer or
make it if you’re building something and
so when we’re coming up with ideas you
know we always ask ourselves what kind
of new market is this creating and then
also what what part of my day and and
what problem is it solving and so I’ve
gone as far as taking an entire
catalogue of my day from the moment I
like open my eyes and writing down every
single thing I do and then asking myself
like is there something here a lot of
times I’ll be the tours at Mile Run or
something like that
and I’m all jacked up body’s broken
mines broken spirits broken I started to
say what if I can pull this off when I
first walked into the Navy SEAL
recruiters office he looked at me and
said only been 35 african-americans and
70 years make it through you know I said
to myself what if I can be the 36 it’s
the what if I can pull off a miracle
what if I can become someone that no one
thinks I can be and just that just means
talking about that
I have a hair going up on my arms
because it makes me just like what if I
can be that guy that people who call
nigger and this and that and now I’m
speaking at Tom ferry
it’s so hard I thought doing this
research I thought going into it there
were authentic people and inauthentic
people who I had I did not find any
evidence of that at all what I found is
authenticity to practice and you choose
it every day sometimes every hour of
every day and it’s a practice it’s not I
just wake up and have authentic I think
that’s what people always have to ask
themselves do you believe in the concept
of what you’re doing
do you believe that there’s really there
there you can figure out the right you
know product package or the white way to
reach users if you believe that then you
know keep scrapping because usually
there’s a way so it’s about this
movement forward now what you own not
your education or your pedigree not pile
of resources you might have at hand not
your network just going after this thing
and knowing that as you do that you’ll
find what you need you’ll make your way
over around and through and I think the
best entrepreneurs that I’ve met are
able to do that because they have the
strong vision and they know that it’s
worth it to keep moving forward larger
more established entities can’t move as
quickly as you can and success and scale
and size all fight against this and I
would encourage you for the longest
possible time as you sort of start your
own companies to look for ways to stay agile
likely know its sacrifices sacrifice is
a big word to get to the next level
I don’t give up what anybody tells you
you have a mom hmm
Steve’s a mom yeah does your mom alive
yes thank God I should dad oh thank god
you have your brothers your siblings
yeah whether they live 3,000 miles away
that’s sacrifice absolutely you don’t
need this you don’t need on the mother
that to be sitting between a Jew and a
Cuban getting tormented North Hollywood
California to go to the comedy store to
pick up a check for $15 absolutely your
parents man your grandparents migrated
here to this country for you to be a
better fit yeah your brother became a
dentist I’m not putting your dad you’re
right not saying this but you sacrifice
absolutely you slept with James and his
apartments smelling his fat feet is that
for half here which were worse than
those Jews on the blame I never missed a
bus for six years horrifies sacrifices
motive jobs a home for Christmas
yeah and I’m working at a Hollywood gym
good night chef it bothers me that
nobody understands that I always
sacrificed yeah I made the biggest
sacrifice I looked at a five year old
little girl one day in the park and I
told her that I’m really thinking you’re
going away for a while that I think it
would be better and she spit in my face
my daughter my daughter at 27 years old
Wow
when I told her about my dream she spit
in my face on a bicycle and that was to
pick a sacrifice I made I made the
sacrifice to say I’ll give up my
daughter to do something with my life
and I didn’t go to weddings and I didn’t
go to wakes and I didn’t do a lot of
things yeah and I’m sure I’m sure along
the way I disappointed a lot of people
yeah because I didn’t attend their
wedding or whatever function they had
because they had a party after I got off
the coke like in 2009 before I married
is where this came this picture became
clearer to me that I even had a
sacrifice more hmm like I had a
sacrifice more like I went to Weight
Watchers I joined the karate with the
brothers in 2007 I was going that I was
I was four I was 380 when I walked in
there I’m a new horse stances and my
knees would burn they would make you do
these dragon stances when you drag one
foot and kneel on this one I don’t have
to go home put two bags of ice on my
knees but I knew that these were a
little sacrifices I had to get make to
get the where one of the beat but it’s
amazing that people think they’re really
gonna get ahead in this life without
making sacrifices it drives me crazy
yeah it drives me crazy got it no I mean
growing up in Flint there were a number
of obstacles I mean crazy crazy
obstacles because I grew up in them I
mean at the height of the crack epidemic
and also the demise of the auto industry
so there were two things happening at
once and they were both horribly bad I
mean I my it was like the 80s probably
late 70s all the way through the 80s
into the 90s was literally the Walking
Dead and it was real I mean you had
people who were cracked out I had
friends family who one day you know
whatever good people the next day they
were stealing everything you had all the
way to everyone you knew were losing
their jobs and it was a panic and I
remember there was two ways out and one
was through music and performing another
way with athletics but art never you
couldn’t get paid doing are you know
what I mean it was good everybody like
that’s a wonderful picture but it’s
you’re a starving artist that’s the
whole term you know and I remember just
saying okay I’m gonna do this art thing
but I had to do the football thing too
and these are my ways out now I didn’t
believe
that I was actually going to get any
kind of light as an artist but I had one
teacher one man mr. Eichelberger I’ll
never forget this and he was like I
beliefs of Terry you are an amazing
artist he was like I’m the art teacher
you’re better than me and he said you
can go somewhere with this and I was
like okay but you know nobody’s gonna
pay you know buddy’s gonna pay me to do
this nobody it’s it’s good but I I gotta
use football well he filled out all the
applications for me and I didn’t even
know why this is crazy
and he took my pictures and my paintings
and everything that I did he took and
got a photograph did all this stuff sent
him to Interlochen Arts Academy now
Interlaken it’s just world-famous big
deal big big deal arts camp up in
northern Michigan near Traverse City and
you study with people from all over the
world and he literally paint came to me
and told me he already build out
everything and he said Terry you have a
scholarship from Chrysler bull ride to
go to Interlochen Arts Academy and I was
like what are you talking about like you
know first of all I didn’t think it was
possible this is the deal there’s a lot
of things you know it’s weird because
you gotta let people believe in you but
I didn’t believe in myself and when I
got a chance to go to interlaken and
study with people from Europe and from
Brazil and from and these was mainly
music students and then add art students
and it was just as like and covered from
Flint I mean coming from the hood and
then once this changed my life once I I
remember we had an and it was really big
on competition very very big on
competition it was like if you were a
violinist you had to be the first chair
and second chair and I remember all
these kids were disappointed cuz they
kept moving down and it would just feel
like they were crushed and the same
thing with art they gave us to paint we
had to do two drawings and we had a
class doing all these drawings and they
said put those drawings on the wall and
don’t put your name on them we have the
this the sky coming from from the
Cleveland Institute of Art he’s gonna
judge each painting and we want to see
who’s the best and I was like oh man you
know and so I did my deal and I put all
it was a wall full of art and the the
the art guy pointed at mine and he said
that one’s the best one then he went all
the way across the room and he said that
one and they were both mine now life is
a confidence game you know but that
would let me know I was like walking I
can do it I can do like really is good
these people this is all over the world
and then I got a scholarship to Western
Michigan University in art I had a
problem where I had this dream I thought
the easy part would be getting to Bill
Gates the hard part I figured was
getting the money to fly there I was
buried in tuition payments I was all out
of Bar Mitzvah cash some quick money so
two nights before final exams my
freshman year of college I find tickets
the prices right yeah hey my first
thought is you know what if I go on the
show and win some money to fund this
dream yeah you know not my brightest
moment but I had a problem I never seen
a full episode of the show before I only
seen bits and pieces so that night had
decided to do the logical thing and pull
an all-nighter to study okay but I
didn’t study for finals I stud had to
hack the prices right and I went on the
show the next day and did this
ridiculous strategy and ended up winning
the whole showcase showdown winning a
sailboat selling so much and that’s how
I funded the buck wisdom acquisition was
a moral duty it’s not something you do
just to advance in life
wisdom acquisition is a moral duty and
as a corollary to that proposition which
is very important it means that you’re
hooked for life time learning and
without lifetime learning you people are
not gonna do very well you are not going
to get very far in life based on what
you already know you’re going to advance
in life by what you’re going to learn
after you leave here if you take
Berkshire Hathaway which is certainly
one of the best regarded corporations in
the world and may have the best invest
long-term investment record in the
entire history of civilization the skill
that got Berkshire through one decade
would not have sufficed to get it
through the next decade with the
achievements made without Warren Buffett
being a learning machine continuous
learning machine the record would have
been absolutely impossible the same is
true at lower walks of life I constantly
see people rise in life we’re not the
smartest sometimes not even the most
diligent but they are learning machines
they go to bed every night a little
wiser than they were when they got up
and boy does that habit help
particularly when you have a long run
ahead of you want to be around people
that somehow give us the sense like I
when I’m around that person I don’t know
they just I just feel better they make
me better somehow let’s say it’s you and
me and
what I want to feel from you is that
you’ve got my back you understand me and
that when you’re making decisions it’s
not just for you it’s for me as well and
so a rising tide floats all boats the
relationships that go wrong or sour is
if I’m on the side of this relationship
I’m like do I trust that he’s making
these thoughts or moves because it’s
right for him or me
and though thus our relationships are
the one where it’s really just good for
you and I’m just casualty in your in
your experience so what we do a head of
time is we invest in the relationship so
for example the Seattle Seahawks the
product is football so just like a
business you’ve got products for your
businesses as well and but we are
relationship based organization is if
coach Carroll was here he’d say that’s
how we run the organization a
relationship based organization and the
output is football and that we found
that to be incredibly valuable because
we don’t do none of us do this thing
alone and if we’re really going to go
the distance and really step in to the
frontier to do the amazingly difficult
challenging things we need to lock arms
to stay in the trenches long enough and
what happens for most people is we lock
arms we say oh yeah let’s go get it and
then we lock arms and as soon as it’s
hard the brain kicks in and it’s the
survival mechanisms in the brain are
stronger than the thriving mechanisms so
the survival mechanisms are very light
up and what do we do we save our own s
and we unlock our arms and we take care
of ourselves that is how people fray in
rugged and stressful environments
emotionally stressful environments we
unlock and so the extraordinary able to
stay the course locked arms because
their mission minded they’ve they’re
really clear about what they want to
experience and they bet on each other I
think success first of all is knowing my
purpose in life as I have watched and
observed successful people what I have
discovered about them is they really
have figured out why they’re here they
really do have their act together and
and knowing their purpose in life
is a stability for them so that when
everyone else is rocking and rolling and
and and and things are a little unsteady
and people are kind of leaving the ship
and people are kind of abandoning their
causes with these people they hold
steady right throughout the storm
because they they have a true Northstar
they truly are focused it becomes an it
comes an anchor in their life that just
holds them steady and the anchor is a
confidence based upon a knowledge of
purpose and there are a lot of people
from whom we can learn a lot and I think
like you know the one piece of advice is
like don’t underestimate anyone you come
across a fright like whether they’re you
know a blue collar worker waiting for
the bus or they’re you know helping you
at your they’re the server a bartender
at the restaurant or they’re a
lower-ranking employee I mean the
smartest leaders I’ve ever seen have
always gone around the room and asked
for everybody’s opinion I don’t pay no
attention to what they say about me all
I do is just do what I have to do and
get paid and that’s it but I don’t
really pay no attention to the rules of
boxing I don’t pay no attention I defy
all the rules I define I’ve added pages
to the book of boxes the world is a
hurting place and the world needs hope
and the world needs love without hope we
feel like why are we here well
brokenness here’s mine today I still
have no arms or legs but everything’s
changed everything for me I was looking
for hope and happiness and I couldn’t
see it for many years in fact if this
side of the table represents my hope
truth encourages me to become all that I
can be but then we have lies every day
coming in our mind
people who discourage us you know the
people that you have in your life who no
matter how good of a day you’re having
they’ll bring you down or and no matter
how bad of a day you’re having they’ll
bring you even lower you know what I’m
talking about
think of the three biggest discourages
in your life they’re not your biggest
discourages you are you are it only
takes three seconds for me to tell you
something discouraging but then you may
never forget my words well you have to
treat yourself like you matter because
if you don’t then you don’t take care of
yourself and you become vengeful and and
and cruel and you you take you take it
out on people around you and you’re not
a positive force none of that’s good
so you suffer more and so does everyone
around you and there’s a malevolence
that enters into it none of that’s good
so that’s what happens if you don’t
treat yourself like you matter and then
what happens if you don’t treat other
people like they matter
well you lie to them you cheat them you
steal you you you enter into impulsive
relationships with them they can’t trust
you that doesn’t go anywhere they don’t
like you you you end up alone at best
and maybe like a incarcerated at worst
like that doesn’t work and so you watch
the people around you who thrive
regardless of what they say they act out
the proposition that everyone matters
and then you have a functional Society
and I think okay well if if if when you
act out the proposition that everyone
matters you have a functional society
maybe that’s evidence that that
proposition is true it’s like I think
it’s I think it’s true and I got can’t
stress this enough choosing your
partners has got to be maybe the most
important decision you’ll ever make
whether you know personally and love or
otherwise in business
you can change your idea you can pivot
your company you can’t change your
partners without starting over and so I
see so many people rushing into these
relationships I mean you should really
give that a lot of thought this is
something that hopefully will last years
when you know a lot of corporations have
they might call them core values or
guiding principles or so on but the
problem is usually they’re very lofty
sounding they kind of read like a press
release the marketing department put out
they sound just like their competitors
and maybe you learn about it on day one
of your job but then it becomes this
meaningless plaque on the lobby wall
well we wanted to come up with
committable core values and by
committable meaning we’re willing to
hire or fire people based on those
values completely independent of their
actual job performance everyone has a
problem with time but today is 24 hours
and we sleep 6 now I know there’s some
out there that say I need eight
but I say to sleep a little faster
because the bottom line is we have six
hours of sleep 24 hours are available so
if 18 hours now available to your work
your family your hobbies and also to
learn something new or to do something
new which could easily be that you want
to learn a new language or that you want
to read and as a New Year’s resolution I
have to read a book every week or where
you say I’m gonna go and reshape my
party so you’re gonna go and take this
hour out of your schedule and say I’m
gonna train an hour every day so this is
for most people a huge challenge but it
is totally doable I can tell them
because the kind of things that I did
when I came to this country I mean I
went to school I was working on
construction I was working out my 5
hours a day I was taking acting classes
from 8 o’clock at night to 12 midnight I
was doing all of those things I wanted
to make sure that out of the 24 hours of
the day that I don’t waste one single
hour those hours were too precious and
so they’re just want to tell people
don’t give me this thing I have a
difficult time at the time and I don’t
have time for this none of that you have
time
you make the time so I kind of like half
jokingly with with a lot of people say
that you know my job is basically like
to be to be the assistant for the rest
of the company like my job is to make
sure that like you have what you need
that it’s and basically you have
everything you need to kick ass like
that’s my job if you don’t have that
then let me know cuz I’m not doing my
job so many things go wrong when you’re
starting a company and often I think
people ask you know what mistakes should
you avoid making and you know my answer
that question is don’t even bother
trying to avoid mistakes because you’re
gonna make tons of mistakes right and
the the important thing is actually
learning quickly from whatever mistakes
you make and not giving up right and I
mean there are things every single year
of Facebook’s existence that could have
killed us or made it so that it just
seemed like moving forward and making a
lot of progress just seemed intractable
but you just kind of bounce back and you
learn and nothing is impossible you just
have to kind of keep running through the
walls what I see right now is people
wrap up their sense of success and
identity with their prowess and
fundraising and comparing themselves
against how their peers are doing I
think that’s really the wrong way to
look at things and it leads to kind of
non optimal outcomes for instance I
don’t know if the valuations that
companies are getting today is
necessarily healthy for the company
themselves and for us again you know our
inability to raise capital actually
forced us to be very disciplined in how
we think about the operational metrics
of the company and that’s allowed us to
you know be pretty successful to try and
be decisive I try and even if I don’t
know what the hell I’m doing I try to be
decisive because I think it’s very
comforting and reassuring and important
to the people that work with you to feel
that whoever is in charge knows what
they’re doing and knows what they’re
thinking and that if it’s a yes it’s a
yes and it’s a no it’s a no
I mean I don’t think of myself as a boss
I mean I I think of myself as someone
who’s giving direction and guidance and
vice versa
I find that levels of success in almost
any industry or area correlate to a
person asking great questions in some
cases they seem absurd in fact the
hallmarking way of great questions is
that sound completely ridiculous so
someone might ask like Peter Thiel why
can’t you achieve your ten-year goals in
the next six months there’s a thought
exercise that’s like–that’s that’s a
good question to answer for yourself and
these types of questions come up
surprisingly often with with very very
impressive folks whether it’s in
business military entertainment or
otherwise and the way you can get better
at questions is by studying interviews
in part so I studied Larry King I
studied Charlie Rose I studied Terry
Gross I studied that that go down the
list
I studied twenty Robbins who does
in-person one-on-one interventions at
his events in front of ten thousand five
thousand people and he’s just genius
with how he uses questions to like
pattern interrupt and grab someone’s
attention and divert them in a more
productive productive direction now why
is that relevant relevant because
thinking is the process of asking
questions you’re asking yourself
questions then you’re answering them in
your own head so if you get better at
asking other people questions you get
better at asking yourself questions
which means you are a you’re improving
your thought performance and level of
thinking from the time I was seven years
old every Saturday I would go for four
hours of acting class every Saturday
whoa and I loved it
I just left till the point with all the
kids graduated and went on to the other
stuff and I started doing adult acting
classes and then I was in the commercial
classes and then I loved like the hair
and makeup classes
just everything I just couldn’t go
enough and you know what everybody wants
to hear what they already believe to be
true and so the last thing they want to
hear is an original idea that
contradicts their belief system so it’s
very hard to even bring that kind of
stuff up but those are the things those
are the only things things that you
believe that everybody around you
doesn’t believe when you’re right that
create real value in the world
everything else people already know
there’s no value created it’s just
business as usual so it’s so important
to think for yourself compassion for
yourself of course it’s as important as
compassion for others when often I get
asked questions like people who did
something that they now realize realized
was deeply wrong in the past sometimes
people ask questions about they brought
up their children in a way that they now
realize was not very conscious and so
that they may have caused suffering to
their children or other people find they
have caused suffering to loved ones and
they now realize that what they did was
wrong and again I say this is an example
where you need to be compassionate with
yourself because nobody woman being can
act beyond their level of consciousness
so that was your level of consciousness
at the time and you could not go beyond
that and again here to make demands upon
yourself up to a point it might be a
good thing to butcher if you as long as
you enjoy it it’s a wonderful thing when
the enjoyment of what you’re doing is
lost then you have to be careful because
there you have to come to a stop and say
okay this there’s something here that’s
not right because I’m no longer enjoying
what I’m doing you already know who you
are and that piece that piece that we’re
after lies somewhere beyond personality
your need for acceptance
can make you invisible in this world
don’t let anything stand in the way of
the light that shines through this form
risk being seen in all of your glory so
just go and do it
try learn from it you know you’ll fail
at some things that’s a learning
experience that you need so that you can
take that on to the next experience and
don’t let people who you may respect and
who you believe know what they’re
talking about don’t let them tell you it
can’t be done because often they will
tell you it can’t be done and it’s just
cuz they don’t have the courage to try
it Ben Graham in his low in his low
teens looked around and he looked at the
people he admired and he said you know I
want to be admired so why don’t I just
behave like them and he found there was
nothing impossible about behaving like
them and similarly he did the same thing
on the reverse side in terms of getting
rid of those qualities one of the things
I advise entrepreneurs to do is when you
have an idea a classic entrepreneurial
impulse is to hold the idea close to you
and not go tell you because all the
ideas so special
right that’s almost always a mistake go
talk to why is that a mistake it’s a
mistake because your actual real
competitive advantage is not that you
have this idea that you have locked away
in your closet which may or may not be
accurate and you have no idea which it
is your actual competitive advantages if
you’re assembling the intelligence
around does this idea work what is the
right team what is the right learnings
and where essentially and most go talk
to people who failed at what you’re
doing and who are no longer doing it
there always are those people so you
started to start up you know you look at
the history of your space I’m so
surprised how many people I talk to
centers who have no idea the history of
their own space and
there’s some night there’s some nice and
naivete to that in the sense that like
well you’re gonna do differently and and
there’s some truth to that but like when
you get down to to making it work and
now you’re into it already you’ve kind
of stylish what you’re doing and you
have some problems then I’d go talk to
all these people who failed because
you’ll uncover all sorts of interesting
things you could try how do you think
about making a decision when everyone
tells you this is a crazy idea where do
you get the internal strength to do that
oh well first of all I’d say I actually
think I feel feel fair quite strongly so
it’s not as though I just have the
absence of fear I’ve I feel it quite
strongly but yeah there were times when
something is important enough you
believe it enough that you do you do it
in spite of the fear
so speaking of important things like
people shouldn’t think III I should
think well I feel fear about this and
therefore I shouldn’t do it
it’s normal to be to feel fair like
you’d have to definitely something
mentally wrong you shouldn’t feel fair
so you just feel it and let the
importance of it anyway yeah you know
actually something that can be helpful
as fatalism and some degree if you just
think it’s just accept the probabilities
then that diminishes fear so my starting
SpaceX I thought the odds of success
were less than 10% and I just accepted
that actually probably I would just lose
lose everything
but that maybe would make some progress
if we could just move the ball forward
even if we died maybe some other company
could pick up the baton and move and
keep moving it forward so that were
still decent good
yeah stay with Tesla I thought the odds
of a car company succeeding were
extremely low when you start with a your
company you’re gonna have a lot of
anxiety and stress and fear and your job
is to transform that into
self-confidence and to give you kind of
that you know the ability to say I have
clarity I trust myself I have a feeling
for my vision I can see that happening I
work with entrepreneurs all the time
that kind of shift from you know anxiety
to trust that’s the most important thing
that they can go through and so I think
when you are starting a new business you
uh you don’t want to go after giant
markets you want to go after small
markets and you want to take over those
markets quickly what this all comes down
to is doing something exceptional for
your users whether it’s in community
whether it’s in connection or whether
it’s in design this is our big advantage
as a startup is that we can actually get
away with doing this we can make this
the core part of why we’re doing
business I do believe that organizations
human organizations are inherently
unstable they will fall over and you
have to work to keep them upright but
they fall slowly most people don’t
notice it they let their success they
blind them they don’t see it falling
over the following takes place low but
the collapse is quick you have to do
constant assessment you have to look for
the hard truths don’t necessarily think
that you have to have the homerun in the
huge Apple Computer on your first start
I spent a long time in my life with
skills just building little devices for
fun for fun is one of the key things
because that drives you to think and
think and think and make it better and
better and better than you ever would if
you’re doing it for a company build
things at first for yourself that you
would want if you’re not coming up with
ten ideas a day that’s
this thing I’m not coming up when I’m
filling up this page every single day
then my idea muscle will atrophy and I
started this in 2001 and I still do it
every single day like you have to come
up with ideas every single day or the
idea muscle atrophies the good news is
after about six months of doing that
you’re like a machine like people get
surprised at how many ideas you could
just have any like me have to do
everything three times before we get it
right thankfully I know that so I know
that I have to get up early and and try
it five times because the eight-year-old
will be able to get past it in two times
so I have to be on my feet longer but at
least I know it and so I just go at
stuff and it served me very well and
that my resume is pretty varied and I
have a pretty interesting life you’ll
get to do different stuff and have a bit
of access because I just said yeah I’ll
try that I mean why would I hold back as
soon as we I got off the phone call with
him and then also when he said it’s not
in the picture now but we think I think
it’d be great at Dallas dance at the end
and my heartbeat went up on the phone
and I started breaking the cold sweat
like oh no I did that’s not and as soon
as I would all know that’s not that the
other other devil in my ear said dare
you do and I just meant of course I
think it’s yes because I immediately
notice if you don’t you listen out dude
are you kidding me you will forever
regret you have to so as soon as that
got over that I was like well that’s
inevitable I’m doing it mmm now I gotta
bust my ass to go do it the best I can
and a lot of fear that mmm I mean that
was yeah that was some major really good
anxiety and fear and then now we’re
saying now I’m saying by that time now
everything my choice is from that phone
call long work anything I was nervous
but you have to go no don’t go all I go
meet midnight
yes can y’all meet him for another Korey
choreographed session hey a.m. Sunday
morning do you got an hour
I’m gonna go send them here my wife’s
over there watching reading something
I’m standing the mirror I’m a practice
of move this is really embarrassing well
too bad man
in the mirror right now because the less
embarrassing that gets hopefully the
more comfortable you’ll be when you’re
out there in front of 80 people and let
your cameras and one thing you do when
you go out there don’t come up short yo
go all the way you know one way to
conceptualize what makes a good product
is you know good engineering is part of
it good design is part of it but really
it’s one way I think about it at least
is maximizing the probability that
someone shows up at the front door of
you know your store or your website or
or whatever it is and ends up with a
solved problem and oftentimes the best
methodology is to start with the perfect
experience with just one person get that
right and then figure out how to scale
something great instead of scales I mean
not so great and then trying to improve
it that’s really hard to do I’ve learned
an experience is that you know if you
don’t open up and you don’t delegate
then you’ll kill yourself and if there’s
one thing that I’ve managed to
understand is the art of delegation
because if I can pass on you know to
Claire Smith to areum
my palette my understanding my knowledge
then grab it run it and then pass on to
your team don’t hold that inside I was
with a bunch of other investors who I
respect and they brought me a deal and I
wanted to be part of it but it didn’t
feel right
and I wrote millions of dollars on that
one and it just didn’t feel right and I
lost it all within two years associate
investors Dressler got dinner
absolutely and trust you well what about
you said earlier don’t be emotional and
sometimes the gut know this this is a
barometer of risk it’s something an
internalized for an investor that says I
don’t feel comfortable
it’s not about emotions just don’t write
that check that was recently the first
time I didn’t listen to that and I lost
everything
so now my radar is up I listen to my gut
it’s not an emotion it’s an index of
risk and you get it as you age you
become a better investor every year if
only I could live to 200 I’d be really
good many many kids and many grown-ups
do figure out over time what their
passions are and sometimes we let our I
don’t think it’s that hard I think what
happens though sometimes is that we let
our intellectual selves overrule those
passions and so that’s what needs to be
guarded against if you’re not utilizing
an online community then you’re at a
disadvantage to those who are you can be
asking online communities what they
think about your ideas or if they have
any advice with what you’re working on
not only will you hear from people who
are passionate about the subject but
you’ll be hearing from people all around
the world each with their own
experiences and stories that can help
you I looked at lots of companies and
why I thought they don’t succeed over
time we’ve had a more rapid turnover of
companies so what did they fundamentally
do wrong
like one of those companies all do wrong
and they usually it’s just they missed
the future and so I think for me I just
tried to focus on that and say what does
that future really gonna be and how do
we create it that whatever you do
somebody can do it better you have to
bring your a-game in every single day
there’s nothing unique about any one
individual what’s unique is their
passion their ability to execute to meet
targets and exceed them the minute you
lose that ability in capitalism you’re
gone it’s a fair trade the engine that
makes you rich can take it all away from
you there are no guarantees I think
that’s incredibly important so the most
important part of getting to a goal is
to start feeling it now is to start
acting as if right if you want to be
that leader if you want to be that
author if you want to be that painter
all it takes is one action and you truly
are in the process of becoming it so
it’s funny that I am literally basically
done with the book and I’m like can I
call myself an author yet I’ve written a
book of course because you have taken
the action you’re doing the actions
there is no final anointing of anyone
there’s no ceremony there’s no fireworks
you just start acting as if and feeling
it and envisioning it and picturing it
and soon enough you become it right so
everybody starts somewhere so whether
you are a famous ballerina or an Olympic
swimmer they all started somewhere they
all had to take that first class they
all had to take that first leap into the
water right and at what point can you
start calling yourself a swimmer a
dancer an author it’s the second that
you start taking action and you start
thinking it and you’re feeling it right
it’s about embodying it so my biggest
tip for you is to start seeing yourself
as that person and start taking the
small actions of being that person that
you want to be that’s the only thing
that is separating you from actually
being it so you have to act as if in
order to really start getting that ball
rolling and all of a sudden you are well
from being in the visualize where you
want to be and what you want to
accomplish you kind of get lost in the
process of day-to-day you know grinding
it out and working pulling on ours if
you have to you know that this is just
about not losing vision and not losing
sight of what you’re what you’re trying
to accomplish no matter what hurdles you
have to go through so I think that kind
of relates it with whatever you’re doing
whatever you know major you’ve chosen
what you’re interested in so for me and
basketball and it’s about you know
visualizing whether you write it down
and put it on the wall do something with
what your goals are and get lost in the
process of day-to-day grind day to day
getting better every single day asking
questions aligning yourself with people
that have been through it before that
that are experienced and leaning on that
advice and just trying to outwork the
next person and that’s the biggest thing
has acting turned out to be all that you
wanted it to be it’s incredible
it’s incredible you know I I never knew
that I could do it as a career I never
knew it was the first memory that I had
it’s the first thing I can think of as
saying I want to be an actor to my
parents and if I hadn’t lived in Los
Angeles and been in such close proximity
to sort of the mecca of moviemaking
if I didn’t have parents that said okay
we’ll drive you to auditions we didn’t
have the economic means to you know move
camp from Idaho to Los Angeles because
some snotty ten-year-old kids is how
I’ve been acting
we did it after school I got to go on
auditions but it was always and I’ve
said this before it felt like an elite
group of people and it felt like I would
never belong to them so once I got the
opportunity to to for example get the
movie this boy’s life with Robert De
Niro I said Wow
now I’m able to not be able to steer the
course of my career I might be able to
have a career similar to these guys that
I’m you know I so admire and that I knew
at 15 years old was the biggest gift in
the world and that that’s that’s never
left me you know I’ve never I’ve never
that that thirst or that hunger for
wanting to give one great performance
that I’m truly satisfied with or being
one movie that I said I love this film
is something that I don’t know will ever
be quenched I don’t know and that’s I
think that that’s a good thing because
it keeps making it keeps pushing you you
know cuz it’s constantly dissatisfied in
other words so when we see a kid with a
lemonade stand it’s different than when
we see a vending machine selling
lemonade even if it’s exactly the same
product because the story around it is
what people are paying for so when I
meet small business people all I ask
them is not what’s their balance sheet
but what’s their story why should I pick
you why do I care about what you’re
doing and if you start giving me all
this inside baseball statistics about
why you’re 2 percent better than some
other competitor I’m already glazed over
because that’s not part of the way I see
the world there’s a lot of conventional
wisdom out there built up over time and
built through all the learnings from all
the companies
and this may be fully applicable to most
of the companies out there but before
it’s applied to your organization I
highly recommend that you question it
because it could be absolutely fatal for
your success once you have the passion
and thing that you’re passionate about
now you can look at other people or
other entities or other things or works
of art you can draw things from that to
help you be better at what you buy
looking for those common denominators so
I wanted to know how do I prepare her
how do I prepare how do I study how do I
view the game how do you build your game
and my response is much like the way he
builds products and you think
sequentially oh yeah you look at this
the end result of what you want to
create but in order to create that
there’s so many other little things that
go into this massive entity that device
it’s no different than building my
basketball game you start with what do
you want your game to be will we make
your game most unstoppable or hard to
deal with and now you work backwards
from there and you start building it one
piece at a time one move at a time one
countered there’s a lot of similarities
there but what you really need to do is
think about what is the smallest
possible test that I can run for this
idea for this concept for this theory
get it out there and get customers using
it because your customers are gonna be
the ones to tell you if it’s really
working or not try to do something that
you would want to do anyway whether it’s
it doesn’t necessarily have to be a very
successful business because when you do
decide to become an entrepreneur and
start a business chances are it’s not
gonna
dude it’s not gonna become like a
multi-million dollar business so at
least do something that you love in the
beginning so that even if it fails you’d
still enjoy it I think great
entrepreneurs must have the curiosity to
to kind of metaphorically see around the
corner what’s coming
what can I anticipate that other people
don’t see and then you must have the
courage of your convictions to execute
the strategy you want an idea about what
you can say I know it sounds like a bad
idea but here’s specifically why it’s
actually a great one you want to sound
crazy but you want to actually be right
because when you’re trying to
differentiate when you’re trying to do
something different there’s going to be
that gut moment that gut sense is this
right is this not right if you’re not if
you’re not having doubt you’re not
pushing the boundaries far enough the
definition of values is they’re the
behaviors or principles that you
religiously adhere to within your
company
when I say religious I mean that no
amount of data will sway you in it from
from those principles and the degree to
which that you have the courage to
maintain your conviction around those
ideas is the degree to which you’re
going to be successful over the long
term most startups that fail do it
ultimately because they did not make
something that people wanted they made
something that
you know that they thought people would
want but they were either in denial
about it about you know whether it was
actually any good or somebody else came
along and made something that people
wanted even more and so it’s not just
about doing focus groups it’s not just
about you know double-checking your
vision it really is about integrating
this concept of testing our ideas
rigorously throughout the product
development process out the marketing
process even as we scale the hardest
thing to do is start you have all these
ideas and everyone has an idea it’s
really about executing the idea and
building the idea and attracting other
people to help you work on the idea that
is the biggest challenge but the way to
begin is to get the idea out of your
head draw it out you know talk about it
program it if you’re a programmer or
make it if you’re building something and
so when we’re coming up with ideas you
know we always ask ourselves what kind
of new market is this creating and then
also what what part of my day and and
what problem is it solving and so I’ve
gone as far as taking an entire
catalogue of my day from the moment I
like open my eyes and writing down every
single thing I do and then asking myself
like is there something here a lot of
times I’ll be the tours at Mile Run or
something like that
and I’m all jacked up body’s broken
mines broken spirits broken I started to
say what if I can pull this off when I
first walked into the Navy SEAL
recruiters office he looked at me and
said only been 35 african-americans and
70 years make it through you know I said
to myself what if I can be the 36 it’s
the what if I can pull off a miracle
what if I can become someone that no one
thinks I can be and just that just means
talking about that
I have a hair going up on my arms
because it makes me just like what if I
can be that guy that people who call
nigger and this and that and now I’m
speaking at Tom ferry
it’s so hard I thought doing this
research I thought going into it there
were authentic people and inauthentic
people who I had I did not find any
evidence of that at all what I found is
authenticity to practice and you choose
it every day sometimes every hour of
every day and it’s a practice it’s not I
just wake up and have authentic I think
that’s what people always have to ask
themselves do you believe in the concept
of what you’re doing
do you believe that there’s really there
there you can figure out the right you
know product package or the white way to
reach users if you believe that then you
know keep scrapping because usually
there’s a way so it’s about this
movement forward now what you own not
your education or your pedigree not pile
of resources you might have at hand not
your network just going after this thing
and knowing that as you do that you’ll
find what you need you’ll make your way
over around and through and I think the
best entrepreneurs that I’ve met are
able to do that because they have the
strong vision and they know that it’s
worth it to keep moving forward larger
more established entities can’t move as
quickly as you can and success and scale
and size all fight against this and I
would encourage you for the longest
possible time as you sort of start your
own companies to look for ways to stay agile
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