welcome to another YouTube pea-soup er
excited to be here with a new friend and
special guest Jordin who has an amazing
podcast I’m going to be on it shortly
we’re talking about charm it’s called
the art of charm one of the top 50
podcast you can go check out downloads
she is on today to help us talk about
how to be yourself how does it Hawk
yourself into and out of almost any
situation that you want to and I’m super
excited to learn how I think we could be
a little more charming myself
Jordin welcome aboard man thanks for
having me man I appreciate it I love the
background are those acoustic panels
with with photos printed on them I wish
that I was that smart man they are just
canvas panels they’re not a missile they
look like acoustic panels I mean I have
the same thing in my in my studio here
but I didn’t put photos on them I
thought what a great idea
we can combine our two ideas together
yeah I like that now are you shooting
video for your podcast as well
I don’t so you’re off the hook on all of
the things you did to make yourself look
so beautiful today
it’s an audio-only program we’ll use
video so that I can see you to make sure
you’re not like playing candy crush
while I’m interviewing you but I don’t
air the video which I think benefits me
personally having a face for radio and
most of my guests to get self-conscious
you know busy being a general not busy
being on TV or things like that so but I
do I love the YouTube format I tell
people all the time if I had to go back
and start over
I’ve been doing the show for 10 years
but if I had to go back and start over
YouTube hands down I mean it didn’t
exist then even Gary Vee was using like
zidler or something bags ahead in which
to pry doesn’t exist anymore but YouTube
is a better format so props to you for
getting on that cool before we dive too
deep can you just give my my arms a
little bit of a review of the art of
charm what you’re all about what you’re
doing
well back absolutely so what I do at the
ardour charm there’s a show of course by
the same name which I host but what we
are is both a show and a school the
school is located in LA and people fly
in from all over the world and learn
about things like nonverbal
communication body language persuasion
influence networking things like that so
a lot
soft skills that we make in I’d like to
say we turn them into hard skills though
that technically makes no sense but what
I mean by that is instead of being like
just be there for the person it’s like
no no what does that mean what does it
mean to give emotional support what does
it mean to be persuasive it doesn’t mean
this that the other thing it’s not what
you read unlike some blog article by
some buddy who’s trying to do content
marketing I’ll have a real person in
here talking about this and so on the
show we we try to also teach this very
similar and same content so I’ll have
like I had Tony Hawk on recently and he
wasn’t just talking about skating he was
talking about look man building a
business in this world that nobody cared
about for 10 years and then became this
cutthroat competitive market space like
why did he choose to make that brand how
is he protected his brand how has he
become famous in the face of all of this
like corporate industrial might his face
I’ve had general McChrystal on who is
our theater commander in Afghanistan
Iraq special forces guy and just he was
dismissed by Obama so I went through
like how do you make tough decisions
where people could die and then also on
the other end of that if you screw up
not only are people going to die but
then your careers over and so I talk
about the decision-making process when
it comes to that because I think that
those of us where our biggest decision
is do I go to Starbucks or coffee bean
can also benefit from different modes of
thinking so I try to convey mindset in
the show and again it’s it’s all stuff
that’s practical practical and
applicable not just like you can do it
because I think inspirations cheap you
know it’s so easy to find and it’s
actually hard to apply and become
successful so those are the people I
like to deconstruct I love it now
talking about you will talk to yourself
into or out of any situation what are
some of the things that people need to
keep in mind or what somebody showed up
at your school
empathy one movie what are some of the
most foundational things that you need
to break or they need to understand
before they’re ready to move forward
with some of the tactics sure definitely
I think this is kind of a funny funny
question in a way because there are two
sides to the the learning coin the first
day at AOC the
first time people come in generally our
perception of how good we are at how I
should say how well we have a handle on
these skills
he’s always way off people either come
in thinking look I’m really good with
people I’m great at generating rapport
I’m pretty good at reading body language
I’m pretty good at the confidence thing
but I got to work on ABCD and I’m like
okay great let we take that down in the
intake form we have a conversation about
that or they come in and this is more
like like guys like me come in and go
I’m not that good at this I’m not that
good at that I’m really not good at this
and then I have to as an instructor my
team in LA Johnny and AJ and fern and
all those cats down in LA they have to
take that guy and go no here’s actual
proof that you’re better at these things
than you know and now we’re going to
build the skill set so one of the things
that we do on the very first day is we
videotape people in real interactions
and then we show them their body
language their nonverbal communication
the way they sit stand walk and talk and
either they’re thrilled because we’re
building on this foundation that they
didn’t know they had or they’re ready I
won’t say horrendously disappointed but
some of other people are less than
thrilled but they are then ready to
learn because their ego has kind of been
whitewashed by the videotape because
that tape don’t lie does that make sense
yeah it says so nobody nobody has that
you know I kind of think for me it kind
of I think about people’s relationships
with money I don’t think people grow up
having a healthy relationship with money
the other these are like it’s everything
and it’s the only thing that matters or
like oh I don’t deserve money like that
you know I shouldn’t you know I can’t
get that and so at some point you need
to learn that the right relationship and
so I think is the same thing people
don’t have the right expectations going
in as interesting what is when some of
them so what is some of the basic said
like I want to be more charming I see
how this going to impact my my career my
business my relationships whether some
of the foundational things that you work
people to here I’d love to give a
practical drill slash exercise that
everybody watching hanging out with us
can actually apply right away starting
today if that is that cool does that fit
your model do it I love them can I do
anyway my movie
around what am i doing yeah moving right
well okay so essentially and I’m going
to stand up too and I know that made no
difference whatsoever Jessie I’m a when
I sit I’m as tall as a I’m going to
stand on camera so the way that this
works this is called the doorway drill
and I’m going to back up and talk about
why this is important at first so the
doorway drill is essentially a
first-impression drill and most people
think their first impression everybody I
don’t think it’s up for debate your
first impression is very important bla
bla bla you never get a second chance to
make a first impression cliche hear
cliche there that stuff is well known by
everybody but what most people do not
know is that your first impression is
not made when you open your mouth to say
something it’s not made when you want to
make that first impression and that’s
very important to know what I mean by
that and just to put this in kind of
like a funny dating context is if you’re
a guy and you’re walking up to a group
of women your first impression is not
made when you walk up and you’re like
hey ladies what are you drinking or
whatever you know corny thing you’ve got
on deck your first impression is made
will you become a blip on other people’s
radar and so what that means essentially
is that when they see you that’s your
first impression and the next 20 minutes
of you hanging out with your friends and
interacting with other people and not
them that makes up the bulk of your
first impression it’s not controlled by
you and what that also means since it’s
not what you say to them when you want
to say it it means that it’s based on a
visual assessment of who you are and
this goes back to evolutionary
psychology and women are much better at
this than men are because of the way
that the safety concern that women
evolved over hundreds of thousands of
years and the human species and stuff
that doesn’t concern us here but what
this means essentially for us is that
the way that you sit stand walk and talk
is more important than the words coming
out of your mouth especially before
you’ve actually had a chance to come up
with your clever little opener and
deliver it and this is extremely
extremely important to know because this
changes the timeframe the window in
which your first impression is made it’s
much much earlier so
instead of it being when you decide to
go over there and chat after you’ve had
three Jack and cokes or whatever you’re
doing it’s made when you walk down the
stairs into the the venue or if it’s
made when you step into the board room
for the meeting it’s not made the first
time you say something that’s
counteracting your first impression or
bolstering it it’s not your actual first
impression a lot and when I worked on
Wall Street I used to be an attorney in
a past life here and I used to sit in
meetings and conference calls and think
of something really really smart to say
and be on my blackberry and looking at
the case stuff and I would say something
I’d be so proud of myself and then after
the meeting inevitably one of the
partners would say hey you know you look
a little bit checked out I’m thinking
what I’m the one who spoke in the
meeting how am I checked out and I’m
checked out because everything I did
before I spoke was looking at my
blackberry looking at the case law
looking at the facts trying to make
myself small so nobody called on me just
like I did in school right I mean this
is very familiar
so the doorway drill seeks to counteract
that by building up your nonverbal
communication which is actually the bulk
of your first impression because
remember it’s not about what we say it’s
about what we look like beforehand and
most of us are so self-absorbed we don’t
manage our nonverbal communication so
the way that we do this is we stand up
straight chin up chest shoulders back
and a smile on your face right and you
don’t have to exaggerate it you have to
look like a serious weirdo when you’re
doing it you’re supposed to memorize and
sort of get a feeling for how your body
feels when you’re doing this and this is
very important because we need to
relegate this to the level of habit
because what most people do is they go
okay my first impressions made not when
I open my mouth it’s made when when I
become a blip on the radar okay so next
time I go to this networking event next
time I go out or next time I go get
coffee or next time I do this I’m going
to make sure that I stand up straight I
got my shoulders back and my chins up
but the problem is if you try to manage
this stuff consciously what happens is
now I’m talking to you and I’m here
saying something and I’m like oh it’s my
chin up or my shoulders back is my okay
smile on my face oh crap what was Evan
talking about oh my god I wasn’t
listening he’s going to know I wasn’t
listening wait oh crap he’s still
talking and I’m still negative self-talk
feedback loop from hell and then
everything – plane crashes into the
mountain and so what the doorway drill
does is if we remember how this feels
and how it looks
we do this every time we walk through a
doorway we reset our physiology to this
particular set of this particular stance
this particular body language this open
body language positive body language we
do this even in our own house when you
walk into your your living room your
bathroom your kids bedroom your front
door whatever if you do this all the
time you’re going to do this dozens and
dozens of times every day and this is
going to set up your physiology
differently so that you no longer have
to remember to do this because you’re
building the habit of creating this
physiology in yourself and so what that
means is that next time you do go down
to Starbucks or next time you do but I
guess you’re in Canada so next I’m you
do go down to Tim Hortons right you you
yeah I grew up any tribe so I got I got
it do we have a machine we do it I just
the first important coffee though that
stuff is amazing it’s a in Detroit we
basically we’re a short hop to Windsor
to go to go get everything including
alcohol when you’re 19 oh that was my
childhood explains a lot actually but
what that means is that next time you go
out the door you don’t have to worry or
even think about your body language in
your physiology or nonverbal
communication because you have relegated
hopefully at this point a few weeks
later of doing the doorway doorway drill
you’ve relegated this to the level of
habit so that next time you’re
interacting with people your physiology
is different your first impressions are
therefore different and this creates a
virtuous cycle because when you look a
certain way and you start to behave a
little bit in the way of that physiology
people start to treat you differently
and this is something that happens
subconsciously we’re wired this way as
humans people treat you like you’re more
friendly open outgoing confident
whatever sort of positive attribute they
attribute to this physiology and when
people treat you differently this as we
know from science and research is the
primary factor that influences behavior
how you’re treated by your parents
influences the way you grow up how
you’re treated by your classmates
influences the way that you socialize so
if you change your physiology and people
start treating me differently your
behavior starts to change as well so
it’s a virtuous cycle if people are
treating you as an open friendly
confident person then you start to
behave
more that way which also reinforces your
new physiology which means that at some
level at some stage in the next 3-4
weeks and few months after that you’re
going to experience over time
essentially an identity level shift a
core level shift in who you think that
you are and who you actually are instead
of being the quiet meek person or
instead of being somebody who’s maybe
afraid to speak up or somebody who feels
ill ADIZ and their own skin and
networking events or in business
meetings or in a dating scenario you
start to be treated differently you
start to act differently you start to be
differently and this isn’t metaphysical
baloney this is science fact physiology
research sort of Amy Cuddy mixed with
our to charm Tony Robbins ish type stuff
in here science base is what we like to
stick with and so the doorway drill is
very powerful because it requires
basically no commitment other than a
millisecond shift in your physiology
every time you walk through a doorway
and it will change the way that people
deal with you and it will change the way
that you think about yourself and it
changes your abilities in social
situations and so that type of thing I
think is a really really high leverage
exercise that people can start doing
right away and see results right away
without like you know buying something
or figuring out how to create this
massive change in themselves manually
which is very hard and basically
impossible I love it so as I’m walking
to a door when I leave it on a locked
door one of the three to five to seven
things that I need to do with my
physiology I don’t have that coffin so
the recap is essentially that stand up
straight chest up shoulders back chin up
smile on your face and it’s harder to do
when talking because it does look more
ridiculous right it looks like a very
fake news presenter but it won’t look
fake if you simply change the way that
your physiology works because you’re not
again don’t exaggerate this too much
because you don’t want to feel goofy
doing it you just want to straighten up
it’s like don’t overthink it right just
get out of hunched over computer all day
mode which is where most of us are and
get into the mode where your eyes are
actually up and your chest is actually
up and no arms crossed that’s kind of
the rule
you’d be surprised most people don’t
walk with their arms crossed but many
people sit with their arms crossed and
regardless of whether you’re just cold
or you’re feeling a little nervous
it just signals to other people look
this person is not in the mood right now
and so we want to encourage interaction
with us we want to encourage iContact we
want to encourage a positive outlook and
from other people towards us and the way
that we do that is really simple signals
your physiology that’s really it works
for men and women it’s not about being a
tough guy it’s just about straightening
up so you don’t have to worry like oh I
didn’t I did my my shoulders back but I
didn’t do my chin up high enough like
just don’t overthink it that’s the
number one rule got it and I’m so if
people are standing like this and then
they’re thinking okay oh Jordan said I
can’t cut my arm what am I supposed to
do now where do I arms right I can see
people being self-conscious oh yes
that’s a resident that’s a great
question it’s probably the most common
question is oh shoot I always stand
there with my arms crossed what do I do
with my hands now and so I tell the
answer is whatever you want however
that’s a terrible answer for somebody
who’s got an engineer brain for example
because they’re just like no whatever I
want know what’s the right answer this
question right I was a good student I
need the right answer this question and
so I would say either if you’re if
you’re holding something in one hand and
find just had the other hand in your
pocket with your thumb out that way
you’re not tempted to do something weird
in your pocket that looks awkward just
you know fingers in thumb out or you can
just have your hands resting kind of
like this or like this you know just
clamps and just have them in front of
yourself it’s still a little bit closed
its not super ideal but it’s certainly
better than this
and the what I’m trying to stay away
from here is making people self
conscious about what they’re doing even
and now that they’re straightened up
because the truth is it’s just as easy
to look awkward
if by doing something like this while
being straight up and then just trying
to look like a tough guy or feeling that
you’re being perceived that way so
whatever you do with your hands is
probably fine
it’s just a matter of having that open
and positive body language and not being
as fidgety so yeah if you’re used to
doing this and then you find yourself
doing a lot of you know this stuff
all the time because you’re you’re not
sure what to do the easiest thing that
we teach the aoc students at workshops
who really can’t stop fidgeting is just
fingers and pockets but thumbs out that
way it’s really hard to fidget it’s
really also hard to do that thing where
you have your hands in your pockets and
you just look like you’re really
suspicious because you’re you’re hiding
something and then it ideally if you’re
just hanging out at a networking event
or a business meeting or something like
that and you have coffee or a beverage
you hold that in one hand and the other
hand can either go in your pocket or
just rest on a table it’s like I know
that this sounds super super simple but
if you start to look at what we do on a
daily basis most of us it’s just were
just all over the place we’re not
thinking about it and we tend to wear
our emotional state on our sleeves
non-verbally which is the natural state
of us as humans however if we look
uncomfortable or unfriendly or scared
when we do that it’s not doing us any
favors and it’s making that first
impression pretty a pretty poor first
impression so let me ask you this this
is interesting I will fidget a lot with
my brain and it was both married I don’t
know if you could use a lot but I’ll
play with it as I’m thinking like I like
to have something while I’m thinking or
being creative not of not of a nervous
like I’m afraid to meet this person and
they’re like what do I do
but but when I’m away from a
brainstorming meeting or have a
conversation somebody like the ring is
coming up and I’m like looking around or
so what what is it like I have in my
stomach what is right what is that
what’s that what are you thinking about
that what’s the message I’m giving out
like doing there
I actually I haven’t seen it happened
that much in real time but what that
would signal to me is actually and what
I think your brain is probably doing
subconsciously is activating what’s
called the default mode Network and tell
me if this is true for you when you’re
in the shower are you ever like oh my
god that I’m so doing that that is such
a good idea when you’re in the shower
driving that generally kind of or maybe
out for a walk those are kind of the
three the top three idea generating
things throughout history and if you
look at famous people famous people I
mean like famous inventors Edison
Einstein Thoreau all these guys there’s
a chart somewhere on the internet and I
can try to find it or maybe
one of us can try to find it it charts
what their days were like and from their
journals which of course all of these
guys left back in the day it charts what
their days were like and so every day a
lot of these guys Tesla Edison they all
took long walks anywhere from half an
hour to three plus hours on any given
day and that was a mandatory part of
their routine and the reason was in
retrospect of course they’re probably
activating their default note mode
Network which is their body’s doing
something that’s taking up a certain
percentage of their cognitive resources
in order to manage you’re trying not to
drop your ring you want to know where it
is you’re you’re experiencing a certain
feeling of having it on your thumb
another feeling of having on your ring
finger another feeling of having it on
your pinky that is keeping the logical
part of your brain the prefrontal cortex
essentially busy enough so that the
other parts of your brain which have
hundred / thousands of times more
processing power those things can then
fire off without being corralled by the
parts of your brain that want to make
sure that
oh the make sure the rings on the right
finger make sure you don’t forget your
coffee make sure you pick up the kids
from school that stuff is all being
taken up that’s all that processing
power is being taken up and that’s why
your brain can then come up with great
ideas that’s why we come up with amazing
ideas when driving and then we forget
how we got home and then we come up with
amazing ideas in the shower and we think
did I wash my hair already I mean it
depends it’s pretty soon I won’t have
that problem but but it’ll be something
else right at that point and so we’re
activating that default mode network it
depends on how you’re fidgeting if
you’re fidgeting and you’re looking
around and you’re micromanaging in your
head how you’re being perceived by
others that’s a lack of comfort in your
own skin that’s going to put people off
however if you’re just messing with your
ring while you’re thinking about
something very very natural and it’s
actually probably helpful for your brain
to to be creative while you’re doing
that right I think I mean this whole
time has been just been playing with the
ring I was more I think it actually I
think it definitely helps me I’m worried
I’m not thinking how would people judge
me I’m thinking though that I can bring
it up like is that I still probably
won’t change it anyway because I got to
be me
I’m wondering what the protection would
be well if you’re not worrying about
other people judging you you’re doing
this and you’re fidgeting with your ring
in order to come with creative ideas I’m
saying don’t change it don’t change it
here if you’re one of those people who
like me I just constantly sit tea while
I do the show and I’ll sip tea yeah
and then I’ll put it down and then two
seconds later I’ll sit more tea and I’ll
just it’s almost like if you saw me
doing this while I was not doing my show
you might be like this guy’s so weird
every time he puts his feet but I don’t
worry about that I’m not even thinking
about drinking the tea I’m usually I do
it when I’m listening and not talking of
course yeah so suggest Hocking I’m
sipping tea put it down to tea put it
down but I’m processing what the guest
is saying the whole time and that’s been
very important to me when I don’t drink
the tea when I don’t create something
for my prefrontal cortex to do while the
guest is talking I’ve found over the
years that I end up going oh man I’m
almost out of cough drops dammit what
was he’s just talking about I forgot
dang right I just end up with this weird
kind of hyper brain that is not
conducive to being a good listener so
I’ve learned how to cope with that by
figuring out how to keep that part of my
brain busy and most creative types have
done this that’s why you see creatives
doing weird stuff all the time and some
of the most creative people around
unfortunately have issues with
substances that also limit what that
part of your brain can do because it’s
driving them freakin crazy and it’s
keeping their potential at bay
unfortunately there are side effects
that go along with alcohol and
painkillers and things like that but the
reason they start doing that stuff in
the first place is largely because of
that creative process and you hear
creatives all the time say things like I
just don’t feel like myself when I’m not
able to insert you know vice here and so
your your ring by comparison is a very
healthy alternative to mess Eero and
painkillers sleeping pills alcohol so go
ahead and fit with the ring as much as
you want it alright back to this doorway
test I want it I want to understand it
with the mind and I get the physiology
leads to the confidence in the mind I’m
wondering is there is that the only
textures there also are you thinking
something as you walk to the door is it
like okay I’m happy and like are you
telling yourself anything or the judge
I’m going to I’m going to do the body
thing and the body cream is how many
minds is it that way yeah that’s a
really good question actually there’s a
one of those sort of Maxim’s here at AOC
which is again there’s science behind
this that I won’t really bore you all
with right now the body follows the mind
and the mind follows the body and this
is like a very very simple kind of
almost obvious truth that a lot of
people don’t think about and so when we
do have our physiology set up correctly
we do tend to experience something in
our brain that says all right I’m coming
in I’m feeling good I’m feeling
confident I’m feeling open it’s also
conscious it’s not something that you
have to tell yourself you shouldn’t
worry about you shouldn’t worry about
like getting yourself all jazzed up to
go walk into Starbucks it’s really not
necessary you can if you want to if you
find that it helps sure give yourself a
pep talk every time you walk through the
door it might be helpful to sort of
reduce it to maybe one word where you
just say something like you know open or
or positive or whatever you can just say
your name I you just like Evan right I’m
in Evan mode now I’m upright I’m
confident I’m happy I got my smile on my
face that’s fine it can just be symbolic
our brains are really good with
symbolism so if you’re going to create
that doorway drill and you want to sort
of have a mantra word that you’re
repeating your head when you go through
every door then go for it I personally
don’t use it that much but a lot of aoc
students do use it especially the guys
and girls that have engineer brains
where it’s like they need to flip a
switch and it can’t just be a subtle
physiology thing it’s got to be like
alright I’m in this mode now that it’s
got to be something logical that takes
them into a different mode and if that
helps you then definitely go for it but
do avoid you avoid the self-talk where
you go okay I’m walking in here this I’m
going to be upright and Oh Mike you know
there’s a lot of people in here so I got
to make sure that I did it because that
can spiral into what we call being in
your head
which is worrying a lot about how you’re
perceived by others which is the actual
opposite of what the doorway drill is
supposed to accomplish does that make
sense yeah absolutely people in the live
chat are first holder loving you bought
the comment to like this guy but also
they’re they’re laughing because my book
is called your one word telling like oh
yeah words oh these that was a little
conscious thing
Thanks parallel I think of just doctor
matrix on Regis and every time he left
his office to go into like studio mode
he would also touch the top of the door
yeah and so is that you efforts
incorporate that like if you’re walking
through like a physical reminder like
touch the sizes or touch the top of the
door and that fits you up or I can you
can I mean the the the reason I think
that he may have done that and it’s it’s
funny I haven’t seen that documentary
but I definitely want to check it out
he’s a funny guy I’ve seen him a lot
because I used to work at Sirius XM
satellite radio and he was in there and
I remember one I actually remember one
time I was going to the bathroom before
my show when we were doing it live in
Times Square and I’m going to the
bathroom and I looked next to me and I
see I look over there’s this like you
know shorter guy and I looked like oh hi
how you doing you know the polite urinal
small talk and he goes hiya Dylan and I
was just like oh my god it’s Regis
Philbin protects me and man is he can
for a guy who lives in New York really
tan
what would I lost my train so tapping
the side of the door and things like
that that will work especially if it’s
always the same place I would avoid
doing that like every time you walk into
the airport
Starbucks some random office because it
can it can backfire on you I’ve
definitely seen there in there times
when you can’t do it and then you’re
going to end up with a physiological
hang but for example this studio I walk
in here every time I walk in here I walk
in pretty much the same way I turn on
the studio lights I have a remote that
turns on some of these other lights some
of which are off that you can see behind
me and I’ve got all my audio gear here
that has there’s all this digital stuff
but I got this analog stuff because it
has
just a jillion switches and I like
flippin those switches and watching them
warm up and hearing like the right I
like that because that’s like alright
this is happening we’re going on air and
I find myself getting a burst of energy
from that it’s a it’s a ritual humans
are wired for ritual so I would say yes
definitely do it if you get to your
office and the first thing you do is
make yourself a cup of tea and throw in
a piece of Trident or something like
that then that can be the ritual but it
shouldn’t necessarily be something that
you transport with you everywhere you go
because if you can’t do it you end up
with a little like an unflinching your
head and you’ll worry about it even if
subconsciously and also the other thing
is it loses meaning if it’s something
you do every time you walk through a
doorway because the point of the doorway
drill is your physiology is going to
stay positive and it’s going to change
the way that others perceive you but it
doesn’t have to be you getting psyched
up and so you shouldn’t need to psych
yourself up every time you walk through
a doorway it would be impossible to
maintain that level of energy and
emotion throughout the day so the drill
would then lose meaning the gesture of
tapping the door would lose meaning you
see guys like like you said with Regis
he taps the door doorway to a studio he
probably doesn’t do that when he walks
into the can right he’s probably like I
rented this is this is business as usual
the other things on camera in front of a
million people one is decidedly more
important than the other you guys have
you guys have witnesses did he touch the
door Jordan I know now I’m like did he
touch the ribbon in I don’t know I don’t
know if he tapped the side of the door
cooling well it’s amazing how quickly
half an hour
flies by oh my gosh really appreciate
the love energy for people who want to
find out more about your doing your
school podcast where they going sure so
if people are listening to podcast which
I encourage of course you can find the
art of charm podcast and iTunes or any
podcast player or just go to the art of
charm comm and of course it’s on
SoundCloud and YouTube and all that but
it is audio only which is good because I
want people to absorb it and not just be
watching my shiny forehead here in
studio I love it georgg so much value
really appreciate it thank you guys so
much for watching
continue to believe and we’ll see you
soon
excited to be here with a new friend and
special guest Jordin who has an amazing
podcast I’m going to be on it shortly
we’re talking about charm it’s called
the art of charm one of the top 50
podcast you can go check out downloads
she is on today to help us talk about
how to be yourself how does it Hawk
yourself into and out of almost any
situation that you want to and I’m super
excited to learn how I think we could be
a little more charming myself
Jordin welcome aboard man thanks for
having me man I appreciate it I love the
background are those acoustic panels
with with photos printed on them I wish
that I was that smart man they are just
canvas panels they’re not a missile they
look like acoustic panels I mean I have
the same thing in my in my studio here
but I didn’t put photos on them I
thought what a great idea
we can combine our two ideas together
yeah I like that now are you shooting
video for your podcast as well
I don’t so you’re off the hook on all of
the things you did to make yourself look
so beautiful today
it’s an audio-only program we’ll use
video so that I can see you to make sure
you’re not like playing candy crush
while I’m interviewing you but I don’t
air the video which I think benefits me
personally having a face for radio and
most of my guests to get self-conscious
you know busy being a general not busy
being on TV or things like that so but I
do I love the YouTube format I tell
people all the time if I had to go back
and start over
I’ve been doing the show for 10 years
but if I had to go back and start over
YouTube hands down I mean it didn’t
exist then even Gary Vee was using like
zidler or something bags ahead in which
to pry doesn’t exist anymore but YouTube
is a better format so props to you for
getting on that cool before we dive too
deep can you just give my my arms a
little bit of a review of the art of
charm what you’re all about what you’re
doing
well back absolutely so what I do at the
ardour charm there’s a show of course by
the same name which I host but what we
are is both a show and a school the
school is located in LA and people fly
in from all over the world and learn
about things like nonverbal
communication body language persuasion
influence networking things like that so
a lot
soft skills that we make in I’d like to
say we turn them into hard skills though
that technically makes no sense but what
I mean by that is instead of being like
just be there for the person it’s like
no no what does that mean what does it
mean to give emotional support what does
it mean to be persuasive it doesn’t mean
this that the other thing it’s not what
you read unlike some blog article by
some buddy who’s trying to do content
marketing I’ll have a real person in
here talking about this and so on the
show we we try to also teach this very
similar and same content so I’ll have
like I had Tony Hawk on recently and he
wasn’t just talking about skating he was
talking about look man building a
business in this world that nobody cared
about for 10 years and then became this
cutthroat competitive market space like
why did he choose to make that brand how
is he protected his brand how has he
become famous in the face of all of this
like corporate industrial might his face
I’ve had general McChrystal on who is
our theater commander in Afghanistan
Iraq special forces guy and just he was
dismissed by Obama so I went through
like how do you make tough decisions
where people could die and then also on
the other end of that if you screw up
not only are people going to die but
then your careers over and so I talk
about the decision-making process when
it comes to that because I think that
those of us where our biggest decision
is do I go to Starbucks or coffee bean
can also benefit from different modes of
thinking so I try to convey mindset in
the show and again it’s it’s all stuff
that’s practical practical and
applicable not just like you can do it
because I think inspirations cheap you
know it’s so easy to find and it’s
actually hard to apply and become
successful so those are the people I
like to deconstruct I love it now
talking about you will talk to yourself
into or out of any situation what are
some of the things that people need to
keep in mind or what somebody showed up
at your school
empathy one movie what are some of the
most foundational things that you need
to break or they need to understand
before they’re ready to move forward
with some of the tactics sure definitely
I think this is kind of a funny funny
question in a way because there are two
sides to the the learning coin the first
day at AOC the
first time people come in generally our
perception of how good we are at how I
should say how well we have a handle on
these skills
he’s always way off people either come
in thinking look I’m really good with
people I’m great at generating rapport
I’m pretty good at reading body language
I’m pretty good at the confidence thing
but I got to work on ABCD and I’m like
okay great let we take that down in the
intake form we have a conversation about
that or they come in and this is more
like like guys like me come in and go
I’m not that good at this I’m not that
good at that I’m really not good at this
and then I have to as an instructor my
team in LA Johnny and AJ and fern and
all those cats down in LA they have to
take that guy and go no here’s actual
proof that you’re better at these things
than you know and now we’re going to
build the skill set so one of the things
that we do on the very first day is we
videotape people in real interactions
and then we show them their body
language their nonverbal communication
the way they sit stand walk and talk and
either they’re thrilled because we’re
building on this foundation that they
didn’t know they had or they’re ready I
won’t say horrendously disappointed but
some of other people are less than
thrilled but they are then ready to
learn because their ego has kind of been
whitewashed by the videotape because
that tape don’t lie does that make sense
yeah it says so nobody nobody has that
you know I kind of think for me it kind
of I think about people’s relationships
with money I don’t think people grow up
having a healthy relationship with money
the other these are like it’s everything
and it’s the only thing that matters or
like oh I don’t deserve money like that
you know I shouldn’t you know I can’t
get that and so at some point you need
to learn that the right relationship and
so I think is the same thing people
don’t have the right expectations going
in as interesting what is when some of
them so what is some of the basic said
like I want to be more charming I see
how this going to impact my my career my
business my relationships whether some
of the foundational things that you work
people to here I’d love to give a
practical drill slash exercise that
everybody watching hanging out with us
can actually apply right away starting
today if that is that cool does that fit
your model do it I love them can I do
anyway my movie
around what am i doing yeah moving right
well okay so essentially and I’m going
to stand up too and I know that made no
difference whatsoever Jessie I’m a when
I sit I’m as tall as a I’m going to
stand on camera so the way that this
works this is called the doorway drill
and I’m going to back up and talk about
why this is important at first so the
doorway drill is essentially a
first-impression drill and most people
think their first impression everybody I
don’t think it’s up for debate your
first impression is very important bla
bla bla you never get a second chance to
make a first impression cliche hear
cliche there that stuff is well known by
everybody but what most people do not
know is that your first impression is
not made when you open your mouth to say
something it’s not made when you want to
make that first impression and that’s
very important to know what I mean by
that and just to put this in kind of
like a funny dating context is if you’re
a guy and you’re walking up to a group
of women your first impression is not
made when you walk up and you’re like
hey ladies what are you drinking or
whatever you know corny thing you’ve got
on deck your first impression is made
will you become a blip on other people’s
radar and so what that means essentially
is that when they see you that’s your
first impression and the next 20 minutes
of you hanging out with your friends and
interacting with other people and not
them that makes up the bulk of your
first impression it’s not controlled by
you and what that also means since it’s
not what you say to them when you want
to say it it means that it’s based on a
visual assessment of who you are and
this goes back to evolutionary
psychology and women are much better at
this than men are because of the way
that the safety concern that women
evolved over hundreds of thousands of
years and the human species and stuff
that doesn’t concern us here but what
this means essentially for us is that
the way that you sit stand walk and talk
is more important than the words coming
out of your mouth especially before
you’ve actually had a chance to come up
with your clever little opener and
deliver it and this is extremely
extremely important to know because this
changes the timeframe the window in
which your first impression is made it’s
much much earlier so
instead of it being when you decide to
go over there and chat after you’ve had
three Jack and cokes or whatever you’re
doing it’s made when you walk down the
stairs into the the venue or if it’s
made when you step into the board room
for the meeting it’s not made the first
time you say something that’s
counteracting your first impression or
bolstering it it’s not your actual first
impression a lot and when I worked on
Wall Street I used to be an attorney in
a past life here and I used to sit in
meetings and conference calls and think
of something really really smart to say
and be on my blackberry and looking at
the case stuff and I would say something
I’d be so proud of myself and then after
the meeting inevitably one of the
partners would say hey you know you look
a little bit checked out I’m thinking
what I’m the one who spoke in the
meeting how am I checked out and I’m
checked out because everything I did
before I spoke was looking at my
blackberry looking at the case law
looking at the facts trying to make
myself small so nobody called on me just
like I did in school right I mean this
is very familiar
so the doorway drill seeks to counteract
that by building up your nonverbal
communication which is actually the bulk
of your first impression because
remember it’s not about what we say it’s
about what we look like beforehand and
most of us are so self-absorbed we don’t
manage our nonverbal communication so
the way that we do this is we stand up
straight chin up chest shoulders back
and a smile on your face right and you
don’t have to exaggerate it you have to
look like a serious weirdo when you’re
doing it you’re supposed to memorize and
sort of get a feeling for how your body
feels when you’re doing this and this is
very important because we need to
relegate this to the level of habit
because what most people do is they go
okay my first impressions made not when
I open my mouth it’s made when when I
become a blip on the radar okay so next
time I go to this networking event next
time I go out or next time I go get
coffee or next time I do this I’m going
to make sure that I stand up straight I
got my shoulders back and my chins up
but the problem is if you try to manage
this stuff consciously what happens is
now I’m talking to you and I’m here
saying something and I’m like oh it’s my
chin up or my shoulders back is my okay
smile on my face oh crap what was Evan
talking about oh my god I wasn’t
listening he’s going to know I wasn’t
listening wait oh crap he’s still
talking and I’m still negative self-talk
feedback loop from hell and then
everything – plane crashes into the
mountain and so what the doorway drill
does is if we remember how this feels
and how it looks
we do this every time we walk through a
doorway we reset our physiology to this
particular set of this particular stance
this particular body language this open
body language positive body language we
do this even in our own house when you
walk into your your living room your
bathroom your kids bedroom your front
door whatever if you do this all the
time you’re going to do this dozens and
dozens of times every day and this is
going to set up your physiology
differently so that you no longer have
to remember to do this because you’re
building the habit of creating this
physiology in yourself and so what that
means is that next time you do go down
to Starbucks or next time you do but I
guess you’re in Canada so next I’m you
do go down to Tim Hortons right you you
yeah I grew up any tribe so I got I got
it do we have a machine we do it I just
the first important coffee though that
stuff is amazing it’s a in Detroit we
basically we’re a short hop to Windsor
to go to go get everything including
alcohol when you’re 19 oh that was my
childhood explains a lot actually but
what that means is that next time you go
out the door you don’t have to worry or
even think about your body language in
your physiology or nonverbal
communication because you have relegated
hopefully at this point a few weeks
later of doing the doorway doorway drill
you’ve relegated this to the level of
habit so that next time you’re
interacting with people your physiology
is different your first impressions are
therefore different and this creates a
virtuous cycle because when you look a
certain way and you start to behave a
little bit in the way of that physiology
people start to treat you differently
and this is something that happens
subconsciously we’re wired this way as
humans people treat you like you’re more
friendly open outgoing confident
whatever sort of positive attribute they
attribute to this physiology and when
people treat you differently this as we
know from science and research is the
primary factor that influences behavior
how you’re treated by your parents
influences the way you grow up how
you’re treated by your classmates
influences the way that you socialize so
if you change your physiology and people
start treating me differently your
behavior starts to change as well so
it’s a virtuous cycle if people are
treating you as an open friendly
confident person then you start to
behave
more that way which also reinforces your
new physiology which means that at some
level at some stage in the next 3-4
weeks and few months after that you’re
going to experience over time
essentially an identity level shift a
core level shift in who you think that
you are and who you actually are instead
of being the quiet meek person or
instead of being somebody who’s maybe
afraid to speak up or somebody who feels
ill ADIZ and their own skin and
networking events or in business
meetings or in a dating scenario you
start to be treated differently you
start to act differently you start to be
differently and this isn’t metaphysical
baloney this is science fact physiology
research sort of Amy Cuddy mixed with
our to charm Tony Robbins ish type stuff
in here science base is what we like to
stick with and so the doorway drill is
very powerful because it requires
basically no commitment other than a
millisecond shift in your physiology
every time you walk through a doorway
and it will change the way that people
deal with you and it will change the way
that you think about yourself and it
changes your abilities in social
situations and so that type of thing I
think is a really really high leverage
exercise that people can start doing
right away and see results right away
without like you know buying something
or figuring out how to create this
massive change in themselves manually
which is very hard and basically
impossible I love it so as I’m walking
to a door when I leave it on a locked
door one of the three to five to seven
things that I need to do with my
physiology I don’t have that coffin so
the recap is essentially that stand up
straight chest up shoulders back chin up
smile on your face and it’s harder to do
when talking because it does look more
ridiculous right it looks like a very
fake news presenter but it won’t look
fake if you simply change the way that
your physiology works because you’re not
again don’t exaggerate this too much
because you don’t want to feel goofy
doing it you just want to straighten up
it’s like don’t overthink it right just
get out of hunched over computer all day
mode which is where most of us are and
get into the mode where your eyes are
actually up and your chest is actually
up and no arms crossed that’s kind of
the rule
you’d be surprised most people don’t
walk with their arms crossed but many
people sit with their arms crossed and
regardless of whether you’re just cold
or you’re feeling a little nervous
it just signals to other people look
this person is not in the mood right now
and so we want to encourage interaction
with us we want to encourage iContact we
want to encourage a positive outlook and
from other people towards us and the way
that we do that is really simple signals
your physiology that’s really it works
for men and women it’s not about being a
tough guy it’s just about straightening
up so you don’t have to worry like oh I
didn’t I did my my shoulders back but I
didn’t do my chin up high enough like
just don’t overthink it that’s the
number one rule got it and I’m so if
people are standing like this and then
they’re thinking okay oh Jordan said I
can’t cut my arm what am I supposed to
do now where do I arms right I can see
people being self-conscious oh yes
that’s a resident that’s a great
question it’s probably the most common
question is oh shoot I always stand
there with my arms crossed what do I do
with my hands now and so I tell the
answer is whatever you want however
that’s a terrible answer for somebody
who’s got an engineer brain for example
because they’re just like no whatever I
want know what’s the right answer this
question right I was a good student I
need the right answer this question and
so I would say either if you’re if
you’re holding something in one hand and
find just had the other hand in your
pocket with your thumb out that way
you’re not tempted to do something weird
in your pocket that looks awkward just
you know fingers in thumb out or you can
just have your hands resting kind of
like this or like this you know just
clamps and just have them in front of
yourself it’s still a little bit closed
its not super ideal but it’s certainly
better than this
and the what I’m trying to stay away
from here is making people self
conscious about what they’re doing even
and now that they’re straightened up
because the truth is it’s just as easy
to look awkward
if by doing something like this while
being straight up and then just trying
to look like a tough guy or feeling that
you’re being perceived that way so
whatever you do with your hands is
probably fine
it’s just a matter of having that open
and positive body language and not being
as fidgety so yeah if you’re used to
doing this and then you find yourself
doing a lot of you know this stuff
all the time because you’re you’re not
sure what to do the easiest thing that
we teach the aoc students at workshops
who really can’t stop fidgeting is just
fingers and pockets but thumbs out that
way it’s really hard to fidget it’s
really also hard to do that thing where
you have your hands in your pockets and
you just look like you’re really
suspicious because you’re you’re hiding
something and then it ideally if you’re
just hanging out at a networking event
or a business meeting or something like
that and you have coffee or a beverage
you hold that in one hand and the other
hand can either go in your pocket or
just rest on a table it’s like I know
that this sounds super super simple but
if you start to look at what we do on a
daily basis most of us it’s just were
just all over the place we’re not
thinking about it and we tend to wear
our emotional state on our sleeves
non-verbally which is the natural state
of us as humans however if we look
uncomfortable or unfriendly or scared
when we do that it’s not doing us any
favors and it’s making that first
impression pretty a pretty poor first
impression so let me ask you this this
is interesting I will fidget a lot with
my brain and it was both married I don’t
know if you could use a lot but I’ll
play with it as I’m thinking like I like
to have something while I’m thinking or
being creative not of not of a nervous
like I’m afraid to meet this person and
they’re like what do I do
but but when I’m away from a
brainstorming meeting or have a
conversation somebody like the ring is
coming up and I’m like looking around or
so what what is it like I have in my
stomach what is right what is that
what’s that what are you thinking about
that what’s the message I’m giving out
like doing there
I actually I haven’t seen it happened
that much in real time but what that
would signal to me is actually and what
I think your brain is probably doing
subconsciously is activating what’s
called the default mode Network and tell
me if this is true for you when you’re
in the shower are you ever like oh my
god that I’m so doing that that is such
a good idea when you’re in the shower
driving that generally kind of or maybe
out for a walk those are kind of the
three the top three idea generating
things throughout history and if you
look at famous people famous people I
mean like famous inventors Edison
Einstein Thoreau all these guys there’s
a chart somewhere on the internet and I
can try to find it or maybe
one of us can try to find it it charts
what their days were like and from their
journals which of course all of these
guys left back in the day it charts what
their days were like and so every day a
lot of these guys Tesla Edison they all
took long walks anywhere from half an
hour to three plus hours on any given
day and that was a mandatory part of
their routine and the reason was in
retrospect of course they’re probably
activating their default note mode
Network which is their body’s doing
something that’s taking up a certain
percentage of their cognitive resources
in order to manage you’re trying not to
drop your ring you want to know where it
is you’re you’re experiencing a certain
feeling of having it on your thumb
another feeling of having on your ring
finger another feeling of having it on
your pinky that is keeping the logical
part of your brain the prefrontal cortex
essentially busy enough so that the
other parts of your brain which have
hundred / thousands of times more
processing power those things can then
fire off without being corralled by the
parts of your brain that want to make
sure that
oh the make sure the rings on the right
finger make sure you don’t forget your
coffee make sure you pick up the kids
from school that stuff is all being
taken up that’s all that processing
power is being taken up and that’s why
your brain can then come up with great
ideas that’s why we come up with amazing
ideas when driving and then we forget
how we got home and then we come up with
amazing ideas in the shower and we think
did I wash my hair already I mean it
depends it’s pretty soon I won’t have
that problem but but it’ll be something
else right at that point and so we’re
activating that default mode network it
depends on how you’re fidgeting if
you’re fidgeting and you’re looking
around and you’re micromanaging in your
head how you’re being perceived by
others that’s a lack of comfort in your
own skin that’s going to put people off
however if you’re just messing with your
ring while you’re thinking about
something very very natural and it’s
actually probably helpful for your brain
to to be creative while you’re doing
that right I think I mean this whole
time has been just been playing with the
ring I was more I think it actually I
think it definitely helps me I’m worried
I’m not thinking how would people judge
me I’m thinking though that I can bring
it up like is that I still probably
won’t change it anyway because I got to
be me
I’m wondering what the protection would
be well if you’re not worrying about
other people judging you you’re doing
this and you’re fidgeting with your ring
in order to come with creative ideas I’m
saying don’t change it don’t change it
here if you’re one of those people who
like me I just constantly sit tea while
I do the show and I’ll sip tea yeah
and then I’ll put it down and then two
seconds later I’ll sit more tea and I’ll
just it’s almost like if you saw me
doing this while I was not doing my show
you might be like this guy’s so weird
every time he puts his feet but I don’t
worry about that I’m not even thinking
about drinking the tea I’m usually I do
it when I’m listening and not talking of
course yeah so suggest Hocking I’m
sipping tea put it down to tea put it
down but I’m processing what the guest
is saying the whole time and that’s been
very important to me when I don’t drink
the tea when I don’t create something
for my prefrontal cortex to do while the
guest is talking I’ve found over the
years that I end up going oh man I’m
almost out of cough drops dammit what
was he’s just talking about I forgot
dang right I just end up with this weird
kind of hyper brain that is not
conducive to being a good listener so
I’ve learned how to cope with that by
figuring out how to keep that part of my
brain busy and most creative types have
done this that’s why you see creatives
doing weird stuff all the time and some
of the most creative people around
unfortunately have issues with
substances that also limit what that
part of your brain can do because it’s
driving them freakin crazy and it’s
keeping their potential at bay
unfortunately there are side effects
that go along with alcohol and
painkillers and things like that but the
reason they start doing that stuff in
the first place is largely because of
that creative process and you hear
creatives all the time say things like I
just don’t feel like myself when I’m not
able to insert you know vice here and so
your your ring by comparison is a very
healthy alternative to mess Eero and
painkillers sleeping pills alcohol so go
ahead and fit with the ring as much as
you want it alright back to this doorway
test I want it I want to understand it
with the mind and I get the physiology
leads to the confidence in the mind I’m
wondering is there is that the only
textures there also are you thinking
something as you walk to the door is it
like okay I’m happy and like are you
telling yourself anything or the judge
I’m going to I’m going to do the body
thing and the body cream is how many
minds is it that way yeah that’s a
really good question actually there’s a
one of those sort of Maxim’s here at AOC
which is again there’s science behind
this that I won’t really bore you all
with right now the body follows the mind
and the mind follows the body and this
is like a very very simple kind of
almost obvious truth that a lot of
people don’t think about and so when we
do have our physiology set up correctly
we do tend to experience something in
our brain that says all right I’m coming
in I’m feeling good I’m feeling
confident I’m feeling open it’s also
conscious it’s not something that you
have to tell yourself you shouldn’t
worry about you shouldn’t worry about
like getting yourself all jazzed up to
go walk into Starbucks it’s really not
necessary you can if you want to if you
find that it helps sure give yourself a
pep talk every time you walk through the
door it might be helpful to sort of
reduce it to maybe one word where you
just say something like you know open or
or positive or whatever you can just say
your name I you just like Evan right I’m
in Evan mode now I’m upright I’m
confident I’m happy I got my smile on my
face that’s fine it can just be symbolic
our brains are really good with
symbolism so if you’re going to create
that doorway drill and you want to sort
of have a mantra word that you’re
repeating your head when you go through
every door then go for it I personally
don’t use it that much but a lot of aoc
students do use it especially the guys
and girls that have engineer brains
where it’s like they need to flip a
switch and it can’t just be a subtle
physiology thing it’s got to be like
alright I’m in this mode now that it’s
got to be something logical that takes
them into a different mode and if that
helps you then definitely go for it but
do avoid you avoid the self-talk where
you go okay I’m walking in here this I’m
going to be upright and Oh Mike you know
there’s a lot of people in here so I got
to make sure that I did it because that
can spiral into what we call being in
your head
which is worrying a lot about how you’re
perceived by others which is the actual
opposite of what the doorway drill is
supposed to accomplish does that make
sense yeah absolutely people in the live
chat are first holder loving you bought
the comment to like this guy but also
they’re they’re laughing because my book
is called your one word telling like oh
yeah words oh these that was a little
conscious thing
Thanks parallel I think of just doctor
matrix on Regis and every time he left
his office to go into like studio mode
he would also touch the top of the door
yeah and so is that you efforts
incorporate that like if you’re walking
through like a physical reminder like
touch the sizes or touch the top of the
door and that fits you up or I can you
can I mean the the the reason I think
that he may have done that and it’s it’s
funny I haven’t seen that documentary
but I definitely want to check it out
he’s a funny guy I’ve seen him a lot
because I used to work at Sirius XM
satellite radio and he was in there and
I remember one I actually remember one
time I was going to the bathroom before
my show when we were doing it live in
Times Square and I’m going to the
bathroom and I looked next to me and I
see I look over there’s this like you
know shorter guy and I looked like oh hi
how you doing you know the polite urinal
small talk and he goes hiya Dylan and I
was just like oh my god it’s Regis
Philbin protects me and man is he can
for a guy who lives in New York really
tan
what would I lost my train so tapping
the side of the door and things like
that that will work especially if it’s
always the same place I would avoid
doing that like every time you walk into
the airport
Starbucks some random office because it
can it can backfire on you I’ve
definitely seen there in there times
when you can’t do it and then you’re
going to end up with a physiological
hang but for example this studio I walk
in here every time I walk in here I walk
in pretty much the same way I turn on
the studio lights I have a remote that
turns on some of these other lights some
of which are off that you can see behind
me and I’ve got all my audio gear here
that has there’s all this digital stuff
but I got this analog stuff because it
has
just a jillion switches and I like
flippin those switches and watching them
warm up and hearing like the right I
like that because that’s like alright
this is happening we’re going on air and
I find myself getting a burst of energy
from that it’s a it’s a ritual humans
are wired for ritual so I would say yes
definitely do it if you get to your
office and the first thing you do is
make yourself a cup of tea and throw in
a piece of Trident or something like
that then that can be the ritual but it
shouldn’t necessarily be something that
you transport with you everywhere you go
because if you can’t do it you end up
with a little like an unflinching your
head and you’ll worry about it even if
subconsciously and also the other thing
is it loses meaning if it’s something
you do every time you walk through a
doorway because the point of the doorway
drill is your physiology is going to
stay positive and it’s going to change
the way that others perceive you but it
doesn’t have to be you getting psyched
up and so you shouldn’t need to psych
yourself up every time you walk through
a doorway it would be impossible to
maintain that level of energy and
emotion throughout the day so the drill
would then lose meaning the gesture of
tapping the door would lose meaning you
see guys like like you said with Regis
he taps the door doorway to a studio he
probably doesn’t do that when he walks
into the can right he’s probably like I
rented this is this is business as usual
the other things on camera in front of a
million people one is decidedly more
important than the other you guys have
you guys have witnesses did he touch the
door Jordan I know now I’m like did he
touch the ribbon in I don’t know I don’t
know if he tapped the side of the door
cooling well it’s amazing how quickly
half an hour
flies by oh my gosh really appreciate
the love energy for people who want to
find out more about your doing your
school podcast where they going sure so
if people are listening to podcast which
I encourage of course you can find the
art of charm podcast and iTunes or any
podcast player or just go to the art of
charm comm and of course it’s on
SoundCloud and YouTube and all that but
it is audio only which is good because I
want people to absorb it and not just be
watching my shiny forehead here in
studio I love it georgg so much value
really appreciate it thank you guys so
much for watching
continue to believe and we’ll see you
soon
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