if people are not listening to you stop
talking to them and that’s really that
is the best piece of advice that I can
give you I don’t think we have friends
for the most part who support us
everybody loves you when things are
going great but you really get to see
who you are who the real people around
you are what things aren’t rise and
shine it’s an espresso time what’s that
belief nation it’s Evan my one word is
believe and I believe in you I believe
you have Michael Jordan level talent at
something and I want you to find it
embrace it and make a difference using
it so let’s start your day off where I
grab your cup of coffee and sip on
over to you Jordan Peterson I noticed
that there’s always a group of my
friends who always criticize what I’m
saying and not even try to understand
worked I’m cut where I’m coming from and
I’ve always wondered how to deal with
that I mean I want to listen to what
they are saying but they are not
understanding what I’m they’re not
trying to listen to what I’m saying so
what would you do in that situation very
briefly okay there’s a line in the New
Testament that’s relevant to that do not
cast pearls before swine and what that
means is that if people are not
listening to you stop talking to them
and that’s really that is the best piece
of advice that I can give you and what
happens is is that if you stop talking
to people who aren’t listening to you
and start watching them instead they
will tell you what they’re up to but so
if you have things to say say them but
you find people that will listen talk to
them the ones who aren’t listening pull
back because you’re you’re devaluing
what you have to say by offering it to
an audience that does nothing but reject
it and that’s a good guideline to life
in general so pull back I don’t think
most people are afraid of failing I
think what people are afraid of is
failing
in front of others you think of some big
idea that you want to do if it doesn’t
work and it’s just you then that’s okay
but if you know that somebody else is
gonna see you fail and you’re gonna have
to eat their judgment that look in their
eye that joke and the ribbons that
they’re gonna give you I think that’s
what really holds people back and I
think that’s a really dangerous place to
be in the idea that you will not go off
and chase your dream you will not go off
and do the thing that you want to do
because some friend of yours somebody
that you grew up with my judge you I
think that’s a terrible way to make a
decision and so how do you deal with it
because I think that’s a lot of people I
don’t think we have friends for the most
part who support us who say this is a
great idea go off and do it or who if
you are down will actually build you up
and want you to win a lot of people’s
friends like watching their friends lose
because it makes them feel good about
themselves because they are so
subconscious and have such a fragile ego
that they can’t handle having their
friends be more successful than them
that’s how most people’s friends are and
that’s a that’s a really crappy place to
be in so how do you escape it what do
you do what are the options what are the
suggestions one I would say just have
empathy and this goes through your
friends goes to your parents a lot of
time you know your friends do love you
they have a different perspective there
they’re dealing with their own
insecurities and that’s why they may be
hating on what you’re doing it has
nothing to do with you it’s about them
their insecurities their fears they
might have wanted to take a shot and
they didn’t win and so they don’t want
to tear you down from going off and
doing your thing and having that empathy
removes the sting removes the sting of
the judgment to understand that your
friends don’t want the same things that
you want they want something else they
want a different career they want
different options they want to go down a
different road and so if somebody
doesn’t want the same thing that you
want then their opinions will be
different then they value different
things and that’s okay and again just
having that awareness removes the sting
three if you really value their their
feedback if you really want them to be
an important part of your journey then I
would have an honest conversation I
wouldn’t come at it from a negative
perspective which i think most people do
they’ll come at it from a combative
point of view they’ll come out and say
why don’t you support me how come you
don’t believe in my dreams how come
you’re being so negative all the time
and if you come at somebody from that
perspective
what are they gonna do if somebody
starts yelling at you what are you gonna
do you’re gonna put the wall up and
you’re gonna fight back that’s not gonna
altom utley get you to where you need to
go I would come from a place of
vulnerability I come from a deeper more
sensitive place to say listen you’re
you’re my best friend’s like I love you
I’ve been with you forever your opinion
really means a lot to me I’m trying to
do this thing I really want to know if
it’s gonna work out I can deal with it
failing but but I can’t deal with not
knowing I can’t deal with a lifetime of
regret I would I would love to have your
support on this project but every time I
come I feel like I feel just worse from
a conversation with you and that really
tears me up because you’re my best
friend and I hope that you’d be able to
support me in my projects moving forward
and if you can come from a deep honest
place like that and really let them see
the love that you have and how much you
value their opinion then it’s really
hard for them to still step all over you
and if they do then for like maybe to
spend less time with them and that’s
tough advice but maybe you shouldn’t be
spending as much time with them you
might need to completely walk away if
someone’s just a negative source in your
life you might need to just cut them off
and walk away completely and if you’re
not willing to do that maybe just limit
access either limit access through time
or you limit access through topics so if
your career is the thing you keep
fighting over but you love hanging out
and going to dinners and watching movies
and everything else is great then just
don’t talk about your career that’s
off-limits
you guys always get into fights over
that just stop talking about that and if
they bring it up just say you know what
I don’t want to talk about it and move
on to the next top so the limited access
or completely cut off so that’s my
suggestions and again I think it just
sucks at how much our decisions that we
want for ourselves we base off of the
people around us and the fear that they
will judge us and I think that’s a
really terrible framework to start with
where if you had a little more
self-confidence a little more belief in
yourself and what you want to do and
just knowing that you can deal with a
failure but what you can’t deal with is
not knowing switching your framework to
that so that when you’re 90 years old
you’re looking back on your life you
don’t want to live with regret saying I
wish I did that and I didn’t because
Billy told me not to
it’s not the way that you want to live
your life now I’ve got a really special
bonus clip for you but I want to know
first tell me about your friends I want
to know about your friends do you have
the friends to support you who build you
up who would be happy for you if you won
or your friends that kind of people who
tear holes into your plans and your
ideas and I’m very supportive you don’t
the name names but I just want to know
kind of where you’re coming at I want to
see your perspective leaving the
comments below thank you guys so much
for watching I believe in you I hope we
continue to believe in yourself and
whatever your one word is much love I’ll
see you again tomorrow morning for
another shot a vinspresso
the one thing that you better stay true
to in his business is relationships you
know you’re gonna meet a lot of people
and in Hollywood everybody appears to be
real men but it’s a facade you got to be
a great character and a great judgment
of character you know everybody loves
you when things are going great but you
really get to see who you are who the
real people around you are when things
aren’t and those people that you can
tell a real you hold on to you know you
stayed true to those relationships
because there’s gonna come to a point
where you go damn what do I have out
here with substance do I have out here
if it’s not a party it was not a
nightclub if you’re not in a
relationship what matters it’s only
gonna be about a good five or six people
that actually matter and those five or
six people are gonna be there for you
whenever you need them and the favors
that I called on those are long-term
relationships man but I don’t have many
you know I got friends in the business
that are really my friends but I pride
myself on the 10 to 12 that I have
because they’re genuine
they’re real everything else just comes
off as an associate it’s something that
moves when you move in a high-end buy
but those real ones are real for a
reason because when you call they
respond the things that affect most
people that they don’t even realize I
did not know that my relationships
affected me but mother said Leslie if
you run around with nine broke people I
guarantee you you’ll be called number
two welcome to find out mama was right
she only had a third grade education but
the studies indicate MIT that you earn
within two to three thousand dollars of
your closest friends so so poverty and
living a mediocre life is communicated
in mind to mine and so your
relationships can hold you down or they
can lift you up so I teach people to
practice the principle of oqp only
quality people
dr. Dennis Kimbrell said if you’re the
smartest one in your group you need to
get a new group and so it’s very
important that people upgrade their
relationships so when you choosing
someone when you choose somebody to
listen to and you choose somebody to
learn from and you choose a business
partner you choose a client they got to
be as crazy
ideas as you that’s how you get success
that’s how you know you’re gonna be able
to push that individual that’s how you
know that relationship is gonna last you
know people talk about in business or
think oh you gotta find a balance you
got to find that person you know if
you’re one way you got to find a person
that’s the other way you know that’s
that’s pulling you away from how you
want to do things and how if you’re
intense the next person I want is to be
as super intense super intense now those
people around you they got to be smarter
than you are right but you don’t want to
surround yourself with people that if
you’re the smartest person in the room
you need to get more people in the room
sure okay you should not walk into a
room and ever be the smartest person in
there okay the people around you have to
be much smarter or at least in certain
things you may have an expertise in one
thing with that other individual better
have an expertise that’s beyond yours in
something and something else like but
from the my standpoint you know MJ was
just as as I was Kobe is just as as I
was from him up from being the best okay
I wanted to be the best at what I do
they wanted to be the best at what they
do all right with an attraction
it’s an attract and those are the people
that allow you to push them and allow
them to they understand they want to get
they want to get better you know they
don’t need to be motivated okay they’re
like you tell them hey little
interesting they’re not they’re not
hiring you to come motivate me nobody
wanted as bad as you so what the best of
the best already wanted more than
anybody else there’s a reason they’re
the best you know we we talked about
this earlier at lunch they’re the ones
that are show up to practice early okay
they’re the ones taking the extra shots
the other ones doing the wind sprints at
the end they’re the ones you know
getting treatment taking care of the
body they’re showing up they’re showing
up on off day so you’re saying you’re
sending the guys home you’re saying you
gotta go gotta go home you got a little
eat you got it you got to tell them to
leave you don’t have to tell them to
show up got tell them to leave that that
that that’s enough you know you have
people in your office so you look at it
you know how many employees do you have
now
we got 40 218 4200 agents okay
I had 4200 agents okay if you put them
all in all in the room okay and you were
able to put them all in one shop
together all right and say your hours
were 9:00 to 5:00 okay
you’d have 4200 people in here from
night from 9:00 to 5:00 o’clock from
five o’clock after five o’clock may have
500 after seven o’clock you may have 200
after nine o’clock you may have five and
then guess what at the end of the day
there’s gonna be one light left on maybe
to yours and somebody else’s that person
says as you are but you can count on
that you can count on that individual
[Music]
the most important word ever if you had
to think of one word that’s most
important to you or that sums you up or
that would be like a little beacon hey
believe nation if you want to know what
the most important one word is for Tony
Robbins Gary Vaynerchuk Oprah Winfrey
will.i.am and Howard Schultz I have a
very special secret video for you check the description for details
talking to them and that’s really that
is the best piece of advice that I can
give you I don’t think we have friends
for the most part who support us
everybody loves you when things are
going great but you really get to see
who you are who the real people around
you are what things aren’t rise and
shine it’s an espresso time what’s that
belief nation it’s Evan my one word is
believe and I believe in you I believe
you have Michael Jordan level talent at
something and I want you to find it
embrace it and make a difference using
it so let’s start your day off where I
grab your cup of coffee and sip on
over to you Jordan Peterson I noticed
that there’s always a group of my
friends who always criticize what I’m
saying and not even try to understand
worked I’m cut where I’m coming from and
I’ve always wondered how to deal with
that I mean I want to listen to what
they are saying but they are not
understanding what I’m they’re not
trying to listen to what I’m saying so
what would you do in that situation very
briefly okay there’s a line in the New
Testament that’s relevant to that do not
cast pearls before swine and what that
means is that if people are not
listening to you stop talking to them
and that’s really that is the best piece
of advice that I can give you and what
happens is is that if you stop talking
to people who aren’t listening to you
and start watching them instead they
will tell you what they’re up to but so
if you have things to say say them but
you find people that will listen talk to
them the ones who aren’t listening pull
back because you’re you’re devaluing
what you have to say by offering it to
an audience that does nothing but reject
it and that’s a good guideline to life
in general so pull back I don’t think
most people are afraid of failing I
think what people are afraid of is
failing
in front of others you think of some big
idea that you want to do if it doesn’t
work and it’s just you then that’s okay
but if you know that somebody else is
gonna see you fail and you’re gonna have
to eat their judgment that look in their
eye that joke and the ribbons that
they’re gonna give you I think that’s
what really holds people back and I
think that’s a really dangerous place to
be in the idea that you will not go off
and chase your dream you will not go off
and do the thing that you want to do
because some friend of yours somebody
that you grew up with my judge you I
think that’s a terrible way to make a
decision and so how do you deal with it
because I think that’s a lot of people I
don’t think we have friends for the most
part who support us who say this is a
great idea go off and do it or who if
you are down will actually build you up
and want you to win a lot of people’s
friends like watching their friends lose
because it makes them feel good about
themselves because they are so
subconscious and have such a fragile ego
that they can’t handle having their
friends be more successful than them
that’s how most people’s friends are and
that’s a that’s a really crappy place to
be in so how do you escape it what do
you do what are the options what are the
suggestions one I would say just have
empathy and this goes through your
friends goes to your parents a lot of
time you know your friends do love you
they have a different perspective there
they’re dealing with their own
insecurities and that’s why they may be
hating on what you’re doing it has
nothing to do with you it’s about them
their insecurities their fears they
might have wanted to take a shot and
they didn’t win and so they don’t want
to tear you down from going off and
doing your thing and having that empathy
removes the sting removes the sting of
the judgment to understand that your
friends don’t want the same things that
you want they want something else they
want a different career they want
different options they want to go down a
different road and so if somebody
doesn’t want the same thing that you
want then their opinions will be
different then they value different
things and that’s okay and again just
having that awareness removes the sting
three if you really value their their
feedback if you really want them to be
an important part of your journey then I
would have an honest conversation I
wouldn’t come at it from a negative
perspective which i think most people do
they’ll come at it from a combative
point of view they’ll come out and say
why don’t you support me how come you
don’t believe in my dreams how come
you’re being so negative all the time
and if you come at somebody from that
perspective
what are they gonna do if somebody
starts yelling at you what are you gonna
do you’re gonna put the wall up and
you’re gonna fight back that’s not gonna
altom utley get you to where you need to
go I would come from a place of
vulnerability I come from a deeper more
sensitive place to say listen you’re
you’re my best friend’s like I love you
I’ve been with you forever your opinion
really means a lot to me I’m trying to
do this thing I really want to know if
it’s gonna work out I can deal with it
failing but but I can’t deal with not
knowing I can’t deal with a lifetime of
regret I would I would love to have your
support on this project but every time I
come I feel like I feel just worse from
a conversation with you and that really
tears me up because you’re my best
friend and I hope that you’d be able to
support me in my projects moving forward
and if you can come from a deep honest
place like that and really let them see
the love that you have and how much you
value their opinion then it’s really
hard for them to still step all over you
and if they do then for like maybe to
spend less time with them and that’s
tough advice but maybe you shouldn’t be
spending as much time with them you
might need to completely walk away if
someone’s just a negative source in your
life you might need to just cut them off
and walk away completely and if you’re
not willing to do that maybe just limit
access either limit access through time
or you limit access through topics so if
your career is the thing you keep
fighting over but you love hanging out
and going to dinners and watching movies
and everything else is great then just
don’t talk about your career that’s
off-limits
you guys always get into fights over
that just stop talking about that and if
they bring it up just say you know what
I don’t want to talk about it and move
on to the next top so the limited access
or completely cut off so that’s my
suggestions and again I think it just
sucks at how much our decisions that we
want for ourselves we base off of the
people around us and the fear that they
will judge us and I think that’s a
really terrible framework to start with
where if you had a little more
self-confidence a little more belief in
yourself and what you want to do and
just knowing that you can deal with a
failure but what you can’t deal with is
not knowing switching your framework to
that so that when you’re 90 years old
you’re looking back on your life you
don’t want to live with regret saying I
wish I did that and I didn’t because
Billy told me not to
it’s not the way that you want to live
your life now I’ve got a really special
bonus clip for you but I want to know
first tell me about your friends I want
to know about your friends do you have
the friends to support you who build you
up who would be happy for you if you won
or your friends that kind of people who
tear holes into your plans and your
ideas and I’m very supportive you don’t
the name names but I just want to know
kind of where you’re coming at I want to
see your perspective leaving the
comments below thank you guys so much
for watching I believe in you I hope we
continue to believe in yourself and
whatever your one word is much love I’ll
see you again tomorrow morning for
another shot a vinspresso
the one thing that you better stay true
to in his business is relationships you
know you’re gonna meet a lot of people
and in Hollywood everybody appears to be
real men but it’s a facade you got to be
a great character and a great judgment
of character you know everybody loves
you when things are going great but you
really get to see who you are who the
real people around you are when things
aren’t and those people that you can
tell a real you hold on to you know you
stayed true to those relationships
because there’s gonna come to a point
where you go damn what do I have out
here with substance do I have out here
if it’s not a party it was not a
nightclub if you’re not in a
relationship what matters it’s only
gonna be about a good five or six people
that actually matter and those five or
six people are gonna be there for you
whenever you need them and the favors
that I called on those are long-term
relationships man but I don’t have many
you know I got friends in the business
that are really my friends but I pride
myself on the 10 to 12 that I have
because they’re genuine
they’re real everything else just comes
off as an associate it’s something that
moves when you move in a high-end buy
but those real ones are real for a
reason because when you call they
respond the things that affect most
people that they don’t even realize I
did not know that my relationships
affected me but mother said Leslie if
you run around with nine broke people I
guarantee you you’ll be called number
two welcome to find out mama was right
she only had a third grade education but
the studies indicate MIT that you earn
within two to three thousand dollars of
your closest friends so so poverty and
living a mediocre life is communicated
in mind to mine and so your
relationships can hold you down or they
can lift you up so I teach people to
practice the principle of oqp only
quality people
dr. Dennis Kimbrell said if you’re the
smartest one in your group you need to
get a new group and so it’s very
important that people upgrade their
relationships so when you choosing
someone when you choose somebody to
listen to and you choose somebody to
learn from and you choose a business
partner you choose a client they got to
be as crazy
ideas as you that’s how you get success
that’s how you know you’re gonna be able
to push that individual that’s how you
know that relationship is gonna last you
know people talk about in business or
think oh you gotta find a balance you
got to find that person you know if
you’re one way you got to find a person
that’s the other way you know that’s
that’s pulling you away from how you
want to do things and how if you’re
intense the next person I want is to be
as super intense super intense now those
people around you they got to be smarter
than you are right but you don’t want to
surround yourself with people that if
you’re the smartest person in the room
you need to get more people in the room
sure okay you should not walk into a
room and ever be the smartest person in
there okay the people around you have to
be much smarter or at least in certain
things you may have an expertise in one
thing with that other individual better
have an expertise that’s beyond yours in
something and something else like but
from the my standpoint you know MJ was
just as as I was Kobe is just as as I
was from him up from being the best okay
I wanted to be the best at what I do
they wanted to be the best at what they
do all right with an attraction
it’s an attract and those are the people
that allow you to push them and allow
them to they understand they want to get
they want to get better you know they
don’t need to be motivated okay they’re
like you tell them hey little
interesting they’re not they’re not
hiring you to come motivate me nobody
wanted as bad as you so what the best of
the best already wanted more than
anybody else there’s a reason they’re
the best you know we we talked about
this earlier at lunch they’re the ones
that are show up to practice early okay
they’re the ones taking the extra shots
the other ones doing the wind sprints at
the end they’re the ones you know
getting treatment taking care of the
body they’re showing up they’re showing
up on off day so you’re saying you’re
sending the guys home you’re saying you
gotta go gotta go home you got a little
eat you got it you got to tell them to
leave you don’t have to tell them to
show up got tell them to leave that that
that that’s enough you know you have
people in your office so you look at it
you know how many employees do you have
now
we got 40 218 4200 agents okay
I had 4200 agents okay if you put them
all in all in the room okay and you were
able to put them all in one shop
together all right and say your hours
were 9:00 to 5:00 okay
you’d have 4200 people in here from
night from 9:00 to 5:00 o’clock from
five o’clock after five o’clock may have
500 after seven o’clock you may have 200
after nine o’clock you may have five and
then guess what at the end of the day
there’s gonna be one light left on maybe
to yours and somebody else’s that person
says as you are but you can count on
that you can count on that individual
[Music]
the most important word ever if you had
to think of one word that’s most
important to you or that sums you up or
that would be like a little beacon hey
believe nation if you want to know what
the most important one word is for Tony
Robbins Gary Vaynerchuk Oprah Winfrey
will.i.am and Howard Schultz I have a
very special secret video for you check the description for details
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