greatness is the most demanding mistress
you’re ever going to encounter and I
understand the advice that I’m about to
give you is not for everyone most people
should turn this off the thing that
gives you the most energy in life is
something that you have no natural
inclinations for it then go learn that
but if you don’t learn to punish
yourself you will never get where you
want to go
what’s that belief nation that’s Evan my
one word is believe and I believe in you
I believe you have an amazing gift
inside you that I want to see explode
out onto the world so let’s get your
motivation to attend and get you
believing in you grab a snack and chew
on today’s lessons from a man who went
from growing up in an obese family and
not having any money to pay his bills to
eventually building a billion-dollar
company and now being a force for good
trying to take people out of the matrix
he’s Tom bill you and here’s my take on
his top ten group success vol 2 enjoy
alright let’s kick things off with rule
number one pursue greatness relentlessly
greatness is the most demanding mistress
you’re ever going to encounter and I
understand the advice that I’m about to
give you is not for everyone most people
should turn this off but if you’re gonna
stick with me if you’re going to listen
to what I have to say it’s because you
want something tremendous in your life
you want to stand out from everyone else
you want to do something more than other
people think it’s possible you literally
want to stand outside the norm and if
that’s the case for you then understand
that as Albert Einstein said only one
who devotes himself to a cause with his
whole strength and soul can be a true
master
for this reason mastery demands all of a
person if you want to get great if you
really want to make a skill set your own
if you want to be able to do something
and at the end of the day if you want to
transform the world if you want to make
grand changes if you want to do all of
that all the empty words that people
spell all the time let me tell you the
only thing that’s going to separate you
from all the other blowhards who are
just talking words and will never do
anything is to give yourself over
completely to let that obsession let
that thing that you love completely
consume you and in that your only chance
to really become great lies rule number
two is
can learn anything the only thing you
have to believe in leaned close here my
words the only thing you have to believe
in right now is that humans are capable
of learning that humans for whatever
reason nature has chosen to not endow us
with a whole bunch of like
pre-programmed things so for instance a
baby horse a full I believe is how you
say that when they’re born they can
already walk literally boom they come
out and they’re walking and all as well
because that’s all hardwired into them
but a horse is a horse is a horse and
they’re gonna stay a horse and that’s
that and you’re never gonna find a horse
reading Chaucer just not gonna happen so
that’s all those decisions are pre-wired
humans on the other hand come out they
cannot take care of themselves they’re a
lump of flesh they basically know how to
suckle and that’s sort of the extent of
it but now humans have the ability to go
in all these crazy different directions
and they can learn to become an
astrophysicist they can learn to become
a carpenter a doctor an astronaut like
the number of directions that humans can
go in is crazy the amount of what was
once known as junk DNA we now know as
epigenetic signaling the way that we can
respond in all these different
directions to our environment to the
things we choose to focus our energies
on is is truly unique to humans is just
absolutely astonishing so understanding
that that’s baked into the human animal
is the ability to learn and go in any
direction so once you realize that
humans are adaptation machines that we
can learn anything now it’s like okay
whatever you want to do you can do it as
long as you’re willing to pay that price
I’m not saying that it’s not gonna be
hard it is gonna be very very hard I’m
just saying that it is doable and that
you will receive a return on investment
in your energies and that’s what people
need to know and believe to the core of
their being that my time in this
direction will be rewarded
now here’s where people themselves up
there is this retarded debate about
whether or not it is hey am i
pre-programmed I’m good at math and so
that’s it and I should go do things that
are math or I’m good at verbal and I
should go do things that are verbal I’ve
naturally gifted as an athlete so I
should go be an athlete look I’m not
saying people don’t get our wins people
get early wins and if you happen to love
the thing you’re getting early wins and
that’s awesome man and you will find it
just a little bit easier you’ve got a
head wind or a tail wind I guess a tail
wind you have a tail wind and so that
yeah love that but if they’re the thing
that gives you the most energy in life
is something that you have no natural
inclinations for it then go learn that
when I say that I have zero zero natural
ability as an entrepreneur I mean zero I
had to learn everything from not being
lazy to problem-solving to overcoming my
paralyzing fear to look at world like a
puzzle dealing with anxiety literally it
it was comical as I was going down my
journey in the beginning as an
entrepreneur to figure this out
it’s ridiculous and then I meet people
who are like ripping flowers out of
people’s front yards and selling them
back to them like when I say that that
was not me I had a paper route and I was
so chicken to go up to people’s doors
that I actually only got half the money
that I could have gotten for the same
paper route the same amount of effort
but because I was so afraid to go knock
on people’s doors and ask to collect the
money that was do that for like two
years I did a paper up for half the
money okay that’s how spastic of an
entrepreneur I was when I started so you
can learn this stuff now my goals
demanded that I learn entrepreneurship
so I learned it so that’s what I want
people to understand what is your goal
work backwards from there if it lines up
with what you’re naturally good at
that’s amazing and congratulations but
they’re gonna be times where it doesn’t
line up and you’ve just got a either
change your goal or recognize that I’m
gonna have to figure these things out
and because I’m an adaptation machine as
a human being I can do all of that
rule number three
don’t care what others think any advice
for somebody who is taking steps to make
a positive change but he is getting all
kinds of negative consequences for bad
decisions he took in the past at some
point in fact I’ll just quote loud sued
the guy that wrote the daodejing
he said if you worry about whether the
other people think about you you will
always be their prisoner so unless
you’re prepared to be other people’s
prisoners at some point if they are
hurling dirt on you if they’re
constantly trying to ribéry you under
the earth that you’re trying to claw
your way out from then you’re never
gonna get out you’ve got to just stop
worrying about what they think so they
can’t actually affect you they can only
try to influence your mindset so and
even even now if people hate you slings
and arrows you could get a job digitally
you could go be a freelancer on up work
or whatever people don’t even have to
know who you are so truly in today’s
world they are not gonna be able to stop
you from getting a job but they can
really mess with your head but only if
you let them so I will say to that do
not let them you’ve got to understand
who you’re trying to become believe in
your ability to get there to become that
person to understand that to continue to
beat yourself up for something in the
past is not going to serve you and so
for that very reason
let it go well number four be
laser-focused this question is from
Phroso mara new on YouTube when your
home life is less than desirable it’s
not where you want to be living but
you’re trying to break out how do you
not let the chaos around you affect your
vision and drive so this is a framing
question so what you want to do and this
this Tony Robbins asks this question I
think it’s absolutely brilliant how is
the worst thing that ever happened to me
the best thing that ever happened to me
so in your circumstance how is being in
a chaotic home life the best thing ever
now I’ll give you one example off the
top of my head and this is exactly why I
play first-person shooters can you learn
to stay calm in the chaos because my
friend have the chills if you can do
that it will serve you so well in every
single area of your life
in a relationship in business if you
want to be an athlete if you want to
play games like what ever it is that you
do one of the things that you’re gonna
have to become great at is letting all
of the noise drift away into nothing and
getting into laser focus on that thing
that you’re working on now when I give
advice like that to people they think
well how do I practice the amazing news
is the best thing that has ever happened
to you is that you have a built-in way
to do that your home life is mass chaos
so now you get a chance to practice I
have the chills you get a chance to
practice every day tuning out the chaos
and getting laser focused on something
that’s framing now there are other ways
but that one is so powerful that I will
end it there focus on that it is
practice practice every day thank god
you’re living in this chaotic
environment man congratulations rule
number five build excitement this is
somewhere that I think a lot of people
get lost is they don’t spend any effort
making sure that the thing that they’re
doing with their life is actually
something that generates excitement it
builds excitement it gives to them more
than it takes now it doesn’t mean I’m
not exhausted at the end of my days I am
really tired but I am having a ball
I’m having a ball it’s fun I believe in
what I’m doing I’m excited by what I’m
doing and so that’s where you should be
spending the vast majority of your times
but that’s all stuff about striving to
do more to be more I’m excited to
acquire the skills I’m excited to push
myself it isn’t a dark and dingy place
like I’m legitimately amped up to do it
and that’s what I want people to
understand like I’m the amount of hours
that I work the hard core way that I’m
driven the overwhelming majority of that
energy comes from a place of excitement
it comes from a place of being
enthusiastic about what I’m doing there
is 20% it’s the dark side I’ve leveraged
it it is a real thing for me and it
helps me in those acute moments win for
whatever reason the excitement just
isn’t enough at that moment then I will
think about the people who wish me ill
then I will think about the things that
are dragging me down then I will focus
on the inadequacies in my life and
I demand that I get better at those
things 100% but it’s an 80/20 split
you’ve got to learn balance that split
you’ve got to put something that you
give a about at the center of your
life that is so so so important rule
number six learn to praise and punish
yourself
Andrew Kirby YouTube do you believe in
self punishment and if yes why I believe
in this ferociously this is advanced
class and I know that most people are
gonna have a seizure
when they hear me say this but if you
don’t learn how to effectively not
destructively because that’s where most
people go they get into an endless loop
of self punishment which is totally
ineffective but if you don’t learn to
punish yourself you will never get where
you want to go now
that needs to pale in comparison to the
amount of time that you reward yourself
they need to earn that reward if you’re
just lavishing yourself with emotional
praise and you haven’t done anything
then I think that that will cheapen it
it will ultimately mean nothing and
quite frankly I don’t think you can
really been boozled yourself I don’t
think if you try to praise yourself for
stupid I think some part of you knows
you haven’t done anything to deserve
that praise but when you set a bar and
you meet that or exceed that to then
tell yourself hey you did it you said
you were gonna do it you did it and that
is worthy of praise and getting good at
praising yourself is incredibly
important and I think that most people
have a very hard time doing both most
people don’t know how to effectively
praise themselves they don’t know how to
get themselves first of all to do things
that are praiseworthy and then when they
do they don’t take the time to
emotionally reward themselves meaning
you actually to feel it it can’t just be
intellectual you’ve got to actually feel
that and the same with punishment if you
say you’re gonna do something even if
nobody’s watching and you don’t do it
then you need to emotionally punish
yourself none of you will ever know
whether I actually get out of bed in ten
minutes or less or not but I say I do
all the time but every time I miss it
even if I miss it by seconds I just gave
myself two chills even if I miss it by
seconds I will punish myself for that
because I said I was gonna do it and I
didn’t do it
so the fact that nobody’s watching is
utterly irrelevant to me it has
everything to do with myself now the
reason that this is important the reason
that I think that people need to do this
is because that’s how you shape your
behavior so like water over time can
create create the Grand Canyon or you
can take a polishing rock and shape
stones you can shape your personality
you can certainly shape your identity
and shape your behaviors if you learn
how to reward and punish yourself I know
a lot of people don’t want to hear that
that is the truth of the human condition
rule number seven develop your passion
now here’s how you develop a passion it
starts as a minor area of interest you
gain areas of interest by encountering a
lot of stuff so if you have encountered
a lot of things in your life go out
there and encounter stuff go sailing go
take a dance class go study neuroscience
like whatever it is just encounter a
whole bunch of very broad diverse things
from that you’re gonna get sparks of
interest like oh I actually found that
interesting I want to learn more dive
deep through engagement not through
pondering through engagement you’re
going to realize whether something is
gonna turn into an area fascination so
as you go deeper into it you’re gonna
either become fascinated or you’re not
if you’re not fascinated move on if you
are fascinated then that’s an area where
you’re gonna ask yourself one very
simple question do I want to become the
best in the world out of that thing if
you do if you want to become truly
extraordinary in that thing then go down
the path of gaining mastery now the
reason I think that it’s wise to ask
that question going in is when you frame
it up I’m gonna become the best in the
world that this immediately people
understand the amount of time energy and
weight that it would take to become
truly great at that thing and I don’t
think that passion can happen unless
you’re becoming truly great at that
thing that’s part of passion I don’t
think people are deeply passionate about
something that they really suck at and
I’ll give you an example I love video
games I absolutely love playing
first-person shooters I learn a lot from
them I get a lot out of them I really
just intrinsically enjoy the time it has
both that sense of eating a cake because
it’s just fun in the moment and it I
pull from it life lessons business loss
as I practice getting out of the
sympathetic nervous system into the
parasympathetic nervous system it’s
literally gamified so I’m getting better
I have points I can you know have my
improvement turned into metrics it’s all
of it I really really enjoy but I won’t
say that I’m deeply passionate about it
I’m just not that good at it so it’s one
of those things if I really wanted to
develop a deep passion for video video
games and put it at the center of my
life that then I would set down that
path of really practicing now this is
like this is the most important thing
that passion will do for you which is
it’s gonna pull you through boredom it’s
gonna pull you through the hard times
and that’s why it’s really got to be
something that you just are prepared to
become great at because when you’re
prepared to become great there’s just
these insane moments of boredom
repetition and all of that and if you
have this burgeoning passion coming out
of that that’s what’s going to give you
the energy to get through it so it’s
this symbiotic relationship between a
developing passion and how hard it is to
actually really get great at something
so the things you get great at need to
be something that is this developing
passion so there you have it that’s how
you do it and then that’s why you do it
well number eight practice gratitude
what is the best way to truly experience
gratitude when you have a goal oriented
mindset well I’ll give you just like raw
tactics so first of all I do this as a
part of my meditation routine I try to
experience gratitude both and like the
big things and in the small things
they’re not always tied to my goal it is
purely something to get the neuro
chemistry pumping in the right direction
to be in a good headspace to really feel
and internalize on a visceral emotional
level that sense of like real deep
fulfillment gratitude appreciation for
what you have going on in your life so
like I said I’ll pick something big and
I’ll pick something small so it might be
something like you know I’m so grateful
for 17 years with my wife somebody that
really understands me that knows my
pettiness knows my like the dark ugly
corners of my mind like they know all of
that and they still love me and they
they’re with me on this journey and you
know she picks me up and brushes me off
when I’m down I mean it’s just like buta
I’m literally slipping into the mindset
right now like I am so grateful for that
woman and by the way that’s how easily
it happen
like you start and this is exactly what
I’m going through in my head these are
the exact words that I’m thinking in my
mind I don’t say them out loud but I’m
thinking them in my mind which then
creates this neurochemical cascade and
you find yourself actually experiencing
the emotions of that gratitude then I
will pick something small let’s say take
my dog bonsai man when he gets a haircut
there’s some his fur feels like velvet
there it is I loved about that dog just
don’t know when his hair is freshly cut
super small super stupid but I’m
actually grateful for it and it’s
amazing so I might think of something
small like that I might think of like
whoa on a warm day like that cool breeze
is just amazing or air conditioning air
conditioning is amazing let’s all take a
second to just be appreciative of air
conditioning that again literally as I’m
talking about this I’m actually feeling
the gratitude for these things so it
works just like that number nine
meditate I have found in the absolute
worst times of my life
meditation can get me back to zero every
single time meaning I have absolutely no
physiological remnants of stress or
anxiety it is so amazing and so powerful
that I only wish that I’d started doing
it years earlier and it was mark Devine
the Navy SEAL that I was talking about
before that helped me realize because I
thought of it as very weak and
effeminate which growing up feeling like
a weak effeminate kid getting tough and
getting stronger has been a huge part of
my journey so I didn’t want to do
anything that I felt was moving me
backwards now he was one that slapped me
around and was like look it just makes
sense it’s getting you out of that
sympathetic and into the parasympathetic
and so I thought well if it’s good
enough for a Navy SEAL then it’s good
enough for me I tried it and it was
life-changing and there have been times
in my life since I started meditating I
honestly don’t know how I would have
made it through if I didn’t have
meditation because that ability to get
back to equilibrium to zero with what I
call no background radiation it’s so
powerful so meditation has become a huge
way for me to manage anxiety which is
really really powerful so there it is
and I will do one quick cycle so you can
see how deadly simple it is I
normally sit cross-legged so take that
for what it’s worth but I’ll do it just
normally seat it now I do it with my
eyes closed and I breathe in through my
nose out through my mouth and it looks
like this
hey hey hey there it is all right nice
and easy
I did the second part of the cycle so
you could see how long that I usually
end up holding that exhale hold again I
just do it until it’s not pleasurable
anymore I don’t feel like I’m holding my
breath it literally just feels like an
exhale and it’s so weird even in that
short cycle I almost forgot I was doing
an AMA that’s how powerful meditation
has become for me I I get lost so
rapidly if I’d had this is the last
thing I do when I meditate I put
headphones on over the year headphones
and I listen to the call map I do not do
guided meditation some people love it I
absolutely hate it and I listen to the
sounds of nature and I find that
insanely powerful and if I had had my
headphones on I do fear that I actually
would have forgotten I was doing this
but that’s how quickly you can with
practice and I’ve been doing it now for
about three years with practice you can
get into a super chill state and you’ll
number ten the last one before some very
special bonus Clips is allow yourself to
dream I never give up on what you really
want to do the person with big dreams is
more powerful than the person with all
the facts H Jackson Browne truer words
have never been spoken it is one of the
most interesting things about the human
condition that all of the facts in the
world no matter how true something may
objectively really be the only thing
that matters is whether or not you’ve
got the energy to see through to the end
of what you want to do and the energy
comes not from truth the energy comes
from your dream the energy comes from
what it is that you want to do the
energy ultimately is born out of what
you want to create it’s born out of a
willingness to allow yourself to dream
it’s born out of a willingness to think
that you actually can do it it’s born
out of a willingness to take that first
step but the only reason that you’re
gonna take that first step is you
believe that you can actually make your
dreams come true and that
sense of this thing that you have in
your mind that you can make it real that
you can bring it into the real world and
have that excitement you’ve long
fantasized about and understand and
really feel in your gut
that that thing that you’ve dreamed
about can be real and when you have that
that’s when you’re going to have the
energy that you need to push and to
fight and to go through all of the
difficult things you’re gonna have to to
get on the other side and make that
dream real as Ferdinand fox said the
most powerful weapon on earth is the
human soul on fire but the human soul
can’t be on fire
a dream a human soul is not fed by facts
a human soul is fed instead by a belief
that it can accomplish what it wants to
accomplish it’s fed by that thing that
idea that you’ve had in your mind that
you fan those flames of interest and
turned it into a real fascination and
fan those flames further into excitement
and allowed yourself to truly embody
that belief then you can make it happen
so right now whatever it is whatever
crazy dream you have and we all have one
stop judging yourself for it stop
telling yourself that you can’t do it
and understand when you cultivate that
fire when you take that little ember and
you fan it into a raging in front of the
that thing that human stole on fire is
what’s going to allow you to build
something
that the world has never seen before but
it starts with that dream it starts with
your willingness to cultivate that to
think about it to allow yourself to do
that because so many people stop
themselves they think they’re an addict
fit they think that they can never do it
and even if that is a fact it’s not
something that’s gonna help you live a
life that excites you it’s not something
that’s gonna help you excite other
people but one thing that will do that
is the dream so right now allow yourself
that simply to dream
I’ve got a very special time bill you
bought us clips around not wasting time
that I think you’re really going to
enjoy but first I want you to make the
commitment of the day you watch this
video you learned a lot from Tom
don’t just watch another video what are
you committing to making a change in
your life or in your business leave it
down the count’s below I’m really
curious to find out thank you guys so
much for watching I believe in you I
hope we continue to believe in yourself
and whatever you’re one where it is much
love I’ll see you soon and enjoy the
bonus clip
he said if you can dream it you can do
it now what makes me laugh as I know
right now some of the people listening
to that they say that’s bulls they’re
just limits to what humans can do and I
get that response I understand it I used
to respond to everything like that I
used to see only the difficulty I used
to see only the ways in which it
couldn’t work out and I couldn’t see I
was literally blinded by fear I was
blinded by some bizarre sense of pride
that wanted to justify my limited
existence that didn’t want to have to
face that I couldn’t be doing more that
I couldn’t be more that my life was
somehow less than what it could be
and so I would laugh at quotes like that
and I know right now of the chills I
know right now there are people that are
laughing at that and all they can think
about are the limits all they can think
about are the things that prove him
wrong and guess what he is wrong
there really are limits but if you waste
your time focused on that you’re never
going to create the momentum that you
need to actually make something come
true in your life you can build
virtually anything but if you get hung
up on the virtual part if you let that
stop you if you immediately go to the
things that ultimately limit you and
hold you back that is where you’re gonna
stay forever because if you argue for
your limitations guess what my friend
they become
and congratulations you now get to live
in that box you get to live in that
self-defined prison but if like Teddy
Roosevelt said instead of that you keep
your eyes on the Stars and your feet on
the ground and you don’t pack like
somebody who can’t see that sure there
are limits there are edges to this
universe but you’re looking not at that
you’re looking at how you really execute
you’re dreaming big and you’re
remembering that your feet ultimately is
that contact point it is where the
rubber meets the road it is that moment
of doing and so if instead of rejecting
it because your feet must stay planted
on the ground remember that in keeping
your feet on the ground that’s the
moment of action that’s the moment of
doing something about it
that’s the moment of seeing the
possibilities and then moving doing
something making it real so right now
give up on those weird mental mechanisms
that make you actually want to fight for
the things that aren’t possible to get
people to believe in it to get people to
understand why you’ve chosen to stand
still
instead of that convince yourself that
you should be moving
and don’t do what you know you’re
destined to do
[Music]
only the one won-soon ones one was long
yeah
the most important work ever if you had
to think of one word that’s most
important to you or that sums you Apple
that would be like a little beacon pay
believe nation if you want to know what
the most important one word is for Tony
Robbins Gary Vaynerchuk Oprah Winfrey
will.i.am and Howard Schultz I have a
very special secret video for you check
the description for details
[Music]
you’re ever going to encounter and I
understand the advice that I’m about to
give you is not for everyone most people
should turn this off the thing that
gives you the most energy in life is
something that you have no natural
inclinations for it then go learn that
but if you don’t learn to punish
yourself you will never get where you
want to go
what’s that belief nation that’s Evan my
one word is believe and I believe in you
I believe you have an amazing gift
inside you that I want to see explode
out onto the world so let’s get your
motivation to attend and get you
believing in you grab a snack and chew
on today’s lessons from a man who went
from growing up in an obese family and
not having any money to pay his bills to
eventually building a billion-dollar
company and now being a force for good
trying to take people out of the matrix
he’s Tom bill you and here’s my take on
his top ten group success vol 2 enjoy
alright let’s kick things off with rule
number one pursue greatness relentlessly
greatness is the most demanding mistress
you’re ever going to encounter and I
understand the advice that I’m about to
give you is not for everyone most people
should turn this off but if you’re gonna
stick with me if you’re going to listen
to what I have to say it’s because you
want something tremendous in your life
you want to stand out from everyone else
you want to do something more than other
people think it’s possible you literally
want to stand outside the norm and if
that’s the case for you then understand
that as Albert Einstein said only one
who devotes himself to a cause with his
whole strength and soul can be a true
master
for this reason mastery demands all of a
person if you want to get great if you
really want to make a skill set your own
if you want to be able to do something
and at the end of the day if you want to
transform the world if you want to make
grand changes if you want to do all of
that all the empty words that people
spell all the time let me tell you the
only thing that’s going to separate you
from all the other blowhards who are
just talking words and will never do
anything is to give yourself over
completely to let that obsession let
that thing that you love completely
consume you and in that your only chance
to really become great lies rule number
two is
can learn anything the only thing you
have to believe in leaned close here my
words the only thing you have to believe
in right now is that humans are capable
of learning that humans for whatever
reason nature has chosen to not endow us
with a whole bunch of like
pre-programmed things so for instance a
baby horse a full I believe is how you
say that when they’re born they can
already walk literally boom they come
out and they’re walking and all as well
because that’s all hardwired into them
but a horse is a horse is a horse and
they’re gonna stay a horse and that’s
that and you’re never gonna find a horse
reading Chaucer just not gonna happen so
that’s all those decisions are pre-wired
humans on the other hand come out they
cannot take care of themselves they’re a
lump of flesh they basically know how to
suckle and that’s sort of the extent of
it but now humans have the ability to go
in all these crazy different directions
and they can learn to become an
astrophysicist they can learn to become
a carpenter a doctor an astronaut like
the number of directions that humans can
go in is crazy the amount of what was
once known as junk DNA we now know as
epigenetic signaling the way that we can
respond in all these different
directions to our environment to the
things we choose to focus our energies
on is is truly unique to humans is just
absolutely astonishing so understanding
that that’s baked into the human animal
is the ability to learn and go in any
direction so once you realize that
humans are adaptation machines that we
can learn anything now it’s like okay
whatever you want to do you can do it as
long as you’re willing to pay that price
I’m not saying that it’s not gonna be
hard it is gonna be very very hard I’m
just saying that it is doable and that
you will receive a return on investment
in your energies and that’s what people
need to know and believe to the core of
their being that my time in this
direction will be rewarded
now here’s where people themselves up
there is this retarded debate about
whether or not it is hey am i
pre-programmed I’m good at math and so
that’s it and I should go do things that
are math or I’m good at verbal and I
should go do things that are verbal I’ve
naturally gifted as an athlete so I
should go be an athlete look I’m not
saying people don’t get our wins people
get early wins and if you happen to love
the thing you’re getting early wins and
that’s awesome man and you will find it
just a little bit easier you’ve got a
head wind or a tail wind I guess a tail
wind you have a tail wind and so that
yeah love that but if they’re the thing
that gives you the most energy in life
is something that you have no natural
inclinations for it then go learn that
when I say that I have zero zero natural
ability as an entrepreneur I mean zero I
had to learn everything from not being
lazy to problem-solving to overcoming my
paralyzing fear to look at world like a
puzzle dealing with anxiety literally it
it was comical as I was going down my
journey in the beginning as an
entrepreneur to figure this out
it’s ridiculous and then I meet people
who are like ripping flowers out of
people’s front yards and selling them
back to them like when I say that that
was not me I had a paper route and I was
so chicken to go up to people’s doors
that I actually only got half the money
that I could have gotten for the same
paper route the same amount of effort
but because I was so afraid to go knock
on people’s doors and ask to collect the
money that was do that for like two
years I did a paper up for half the
money okay that’s how spastic of an
entrepreneur I was when I started so you
can learn this stuff now my goals
demanded that I learn entrepreneurship
so I learned it so that’s what I want
people to understand what is your goal
work backwards from there if it lines up
with what you’re naturally good at
that’s amazing and congratulations but
they’re gonna be times where it doesn’t
line up and you’ve just got a either
change your goal or recognize that I’m
gonna have to figure these things out
and because I’m an adaptation machine as
a human being I can do all of that
rule number three
don’t care what others think any advice
for somebody who is taking steps to make
a positive change but he is getting all
kinds of negative consequences for bad
decisions he took in the past at some
point in fact I’ll just quote loud sued
the guy that wrote the daodejing
he said if you worry about whether the
other people think about you you will
always be their prisoner so unless
you’re prepared to be other people’s
prisoners at some point if they are
hurling dirt on you if they’re
constantly trying to ribéry you under
the earth that you’re trying to claw
your way out from then you’re never
gonna get out you’ve got to just stop
worrying about what they think so they
can’t actually affect you they can only
try to influence your mindset so and
even even now if people hate you slings
and arrows you could get a job digitally
you could go be a freelancer on up work
or whatever people don’t even have to
know who you are so truly in today’s
world they are not gonna be able to stop
you from getting a job but they can
really mess with your head but only if
you let them so I will say to that do
not let them you’ve got to understand
who you’re trying to become believe in
your ability to get there to become that
person to understand that to continue to
beat yourself up for something in the
past is not going to serve you and so
for that very reason
let it go well number four be
laser-focused this question is from
Phroso mara new on YouTube when your
home life is less than desirable it’s
not where you want to be living but
you’re trying to break out how do you
not let the chaos around you affect your
vision and drive so this is a framing
question so what you want to do and this
this Tony Robbins asks this question I
think it’s absolutely brilliant how is
the worst thing that ever happened to me
the best thing that ever happened to me
so in your circumstance how is being in
a chaotic home life the best thing ever
now I’ll give you one example off the
top of my head and this is exactly why I
play first-person shooters can you learn
to stay calm in the chaos because my
friend have the chills if you can do
that it will serve you so well in every
single area of your life
in a relationship in business if you
want to be an athlete if you want to
play games like what ever it is that you
do one of the things that you’re gonna
have to become great at is letting all
of the noise drift away into nothing and
getting into laser focus on that thing
that you’re working on now when I give
advice like that to people they think
well how do I practice the amazing news
is the best thing that has ever happened
to you is that you have a built-in way
to do that your home life is mass chaos
so now you get a chance to practice I
have the chills you get a chance to
practice every day tuning out the chaos
and getting laser focused on something
that’s framing now there are other ways
but that one is so powerful that I will
end it there focus on that it is
practice practice every day thank god
you’re living in this chaotic
environment man congratulations rule
number five build excitement this is
somewhere that I think a lot of people
get lost is they don’t spend any effort
making sure that the thing that they’re
doing with their life is actually
something that generates excitement it
builds excitement it gives to them more
than it takes now it doesn’t mean I’m
not exhausted at the end of my days I am
really tired but I am having a ball
I’m having a ball it’s fun I believe in
what I’m doing I’m excited by what I’m
doing and so that’s where you should be
spending the vast majority of your times
but that’s all stuff about striving to
do more to be more I’m excited to
acquire the skills I’m excited to push
myself it isn’t a dark and dingy place
like I’m legitimately amped up to do it
and that’s what I want people to
understand like I’m the amount of hours
that I work the hard core way that I’m
driven the overwhelming majority of that
energy comes from a place of excitement
it comes from a place of being
enthusiastic about what I’m doing there
is 20% it’s the dark side I’ve leveraged
it it is a real thing for me and it
helps me in those acute moments win for
whatever reason the excitement just
isn’t enough at that moment then I will
think about the people who wish me ill
then I will think about the things that
are dragging me down then I will focus
on the inadequacies in my life and
I demand that I get better at those
things 100% but it’s an 80/20 split
you’ve got to learn balance that split
you’ve got to put something that you
give a about at the center of your
life that is so so so important rule
number six learn to praise and punish
yourself
Andrew Kirby YouTube do you believe in
self punishment and if yes why I believe
in this ferociously this is advanced
class and I know that most people are
gonna have a seizure
when they hear me say this but if you
don’t learn how to effectively not
destructively because that’s where most
people go they get into an endless loop
of self punishment which is totally
ineffective but if you don’t learn to
punish yourself you will never get where
you want to go now
that needs to pale in comparison to the
amount of time that you reward yourself
they need to earn that reward if you’re
just lavishing yourself with emotional
praise and you haven’t done anything
then I think that that will cheapen it
it will ultimately mean nothing and
quite frankly I don’t think you can
really been boozled yourself I don’t
think if you try to praise yourself for
stupid I think some part of you knows
you haven’t done anything to deserve
that praise but when you set a bar and
you meet that or exceed that to then
tell yourself hey you did it you said
you were gonna do it you did it and that
is worthy of praise and getting good at
praising yourself is incredibly
important and I think that most people
have a very hard time doing both most
people don’t know how to effectively
praise themselves they don’t know how to
get themselves first of all to do things
that are praiseworthy and then when they
do they don’t take the time to
emotionally reward themselves meaning
you actually to feel it it can’t just be
intellectual you’ve got to actually feel
that and the same with punishment if you
say you’re gonna do something even if
nobody’s watching and you don’t do it
then you need to emotionally punish
yourself none of you will ever know
whether I actually get out of bed in ten
minutes or less or not but I say I do
all the time but every time I miss it
even if I miss it by seconds I just gave
myself two chills even if I miss it by
seconds I will punish myself for that
because I said I was gonna do it and I
didn’t do it
so the fact that nobody’s watching is
utterly irrelevant to me it has
everything to do with myself now the
reason that this is important the reason
that I think that people need to do this
is because that’s how you shape your
behavior so like water over time can
create create the Grand Canyon or you
can take a polishing rock and shape
stones you can shape your personality
you can certainly shape your identity
and shape your behaviors if you learn
how to reward and punish yourself I know
a lot of people don’t want to hear that
that is the truth of the human condition
rule number seven develop your passion
now here’s how you develop a passion it
starts as a minor area of interest you
gain areas of interest by encountering a
lot of stuff so if you have encountered
a lot of things in your life go out
there and encounter stuff go sailing go
take a dance class go study neuroscience
like whatever it is just encounter a
whole bunch of very broad diverse things
from that you’re gonna get sparks of
interest like oh I actually found that
interesting I want to learn more dive
deep through engagement not through
pondering through engagement you’re
going to realize whether something is
gonna turn into an area fascination so
as you go deeper into it you’re gonna
either become fascinated or you’re not
if you’re not fascinated move on if you
are fascinated then that’s an area where
you’re gonna ask yourself one very
simple question do I want to become the
best in the world out of that thing if
you do if you want to become truly
extraordinary in that thing then go down
the path of gaining mastery now the
reason I think that it’s wise to ask
that question going in is when you frame
it up I’m gonna become the best in the
world that this immediately people
understand the amount of time energy and
weight that it would take to become
truly great at that thing and I don’t
think that passion can happen unless
you’re becoming truly great at that
thing that’s part of passion I don’t
think people are deeply passionate about
something that they really suck at and
I’ll give you an example I love video
games I absolutely love playing
first-person shooters I learn a lot from
them I get a lot out of them I really
just intrinsically enjoy the time it has
both that sense of eating a cake because
it’s just fun in the moment and it I
pull from it life lessons business loss
as I practice getting out of the
sympathetic nervous system into the
parasympathetic nervous system it’s
literally gamified so I’m getting better
I have points I can you know have my
improvement turned into metrics it’s all
of it I really really enjoy but I won’t
say that I’m deeply passionate about it
I’m just not that good at it so it’s one
of those things if I really wanted to
develop a deep passion for video video
games and put it at the center of my
life that then I would set down that
path of really practicing now this is
like this is the most important thing
that passion will do for you which is
it’s gonna pull you through boredom it’s
gonna pull you through the hard times
and that’s why it’s really got to be
something that you just are prepared to
become great at because when you’re
prepared to become great there’s just
these insane moments of boredom
repetition and all of that and if you
have this burgeoning passion coming out
of that that’s what’s going to give you
the energy to get through it so it’s
this symbiotic relationship between a
developing passion and how hard it is to
actually really get great at something
so the things you get great at need to
be something that is this developing
passion so there you have it that’s how
you do it and then that’s why you do it
well number eight practice gratitude
what is the best way to truly experience
gratitude when you have a goal oriented
mindset well I’ll give you just like raw
tactics so first of all I do this as a
part of my meditation routine I try to
experience gratitude both and like the
big things and in the small things
they’re not always tied to my goal it is
purely something to get the neuro
chemistry pumping in the right direction
to be in a good headspace to really feel
and internalize on a visceral emotional
level that sense of like real deep
fulfillment gratitude appreciation for
what you have going on in your life so
like I said I’ll pick something big and
I’ll pick something small so it might be
something like you know I’m so grateful
for 17 years with my wife somebody that
really understands me that knows my
pettiness knows my like the dark ugly
corners of my mind like they know all of
that and they still love me and they
they’re with me on this journey and you
know she picks me up and brushes me off
when I’m down I mean it’s just like buta
I’m literally slipping into the mindset
right now like I am so grateful for that
woman and by the way that’s how easily
it happen
like you start and this is exactly what
I’m going through in my head these are
the exact words that I’m thinking in my
mind I don’t say them out loud but I’m
thinking them in my mind which then
creates this neurochemical cascade and
you find yourself actually experiencing
the emotions of that gratitude then I
will pick something small let’s say take
my dog bonsai man when he gets a haircut
there’s some his fur feels like velvet
there it is I loved about that dog just
don’t know when his hair is freshly cut
super small super stupid but I’m
actually grateful for it and it’s
amazing so I might think of something
small like that I might think of like
whoa on a warm day like that cool breeze
is just amazing or air conditioning air
conditioning is amazing let’s all take a
second to just be appreciative of air
conditioning that again literally as I’m
talking about this I’m actually feeling
the gratitude for these things so it
works just like that number nine
meditate I have found in the absolute
worst times of my life
meditation can get me back to zero every
single time meaning I have absolutely no
physiological remnants of stress or
anxiety it is so amazing and so powerful
that I only wish that I’d started doing
it years earlier and it was mark Devine
the Navy SEAL that I was talking about
before that helped me realize because I
thought of it as very weak and
effeminate which growing up feeling like
a weak effeminate kid getting tough and
getting stronger has been a huge part of
my journey so I didn’t want to do
anything that I felt was moving me
backwards now he was one that slapped me
around and was like look it just makes
sense it’s getting you out of that
sympathetic and into the parasympathetic
and so I thought well if it’s good
enough for a Navy SEAL then it’s good
enough for me I tried it and it was
life-changing and there have been times
in my life since I started meditating I
honestly don’t know how I would have
made it through if I didn’t have
meditation because that ability to get
back to equilibrium to zero with what I
call no background radiation it’s so
powerful so meditation has become a huge
way for me to manage anxiety which is
really really powerful so there it is
and I will do one quick cycle so you can
see how deadly simple it is I
normally sit cross-legged so take that
for what it’s worth but I’ll do it just
normally seat it now I do it with my
eyes closed and I breathe in through my
nose out through my mouth and it looks
like this
hey hey hey there it is all right nice
and easy
I did the second part of the cycle so
you could see how long that I usually
end up holding that exhale hold again I
just do it until it’s not pleasurable
anymore I don’t feel like I’m holding my
breath it literally just feels like an
exhale and it’s so weird even in that
short cycle I almost forgot I was doing
an AMA that’s how powerful meditation
has become for me I I get lost so
rapidly if I’d had this is the last
thing I do when I meditate I put
headphones on over the year headphones
and I listen to the call map I do not do
guided meditation some people love it I
absolutely hate it and I listen to the
sounds of nature and I find that
insanely powerful and if I had had my
headphones on I do fear that I actually
would have forgotten I was doing this
but that’s how quickly you can with
practice and I’ve been doing it now for
about three years with practice you can
get into a super chill state and you’ll
number ten the last one before some very
special bonus Clips is allow yourself to
dream I never give up on what you really
want to do the person with big dreams is
more powerful than the person with all
the facts H Jackson Browne truer words
have never been spoken it is one of the
most interesting things about the human
condition that all of the facts in the
world no matter how true something may
objectively really be the only thing
that matters is whether or not you’ve
got the energy to see through to the end
of what you want to do and the energy
comes not from truth the energy comes
from your dream the energy comes from
what it is that you want to do the
energy ultimately is born out of what
you want to create it’s born out of a
willingness to allow yourself to dream
it’s born out of a willingness to think
that you actually can do it it’s born
out of a willingness to take that first
step but the only reason that you’re
gonna take that first step is you
believe that you can actually make your
dreams come true and that
sense of this thing that you have in
your mind that you can make it real that
you can bring it into the real world and
have that excitement you’ve long
fantasized about and understand and
really feel in your gut
that that thing that you’ve dreamed
about can be real and when you have that
that’s when you’re going to have the
energy that you need to push and to
fight and to go through all of the
difficult things you’re gonna have to to
get on the other side and make that
dream real as Ferdinand fox said the
most powerful weapon on earth is the
human soul on fire but the human soul
can’t be on fire
a dream a human soul is not fed by facts
a human soul is fed instead by a belief
that it can accomplish what it wants to
accomplish it’s fed by that thing that
idea that you’ve had in your mind that
you fan those flames of interest and
turned it into a real fascination and
fan those flames further into excitement
and allowed yourself to truly embody
that belief then you can make it happen
so right now whatever it is whatever
crazy dream you have and we all have one
stop judging yourself for it stop
telling yourself that you can’t do it
and understand when you cultivate that
fire when you take that little ember and
you fan it into a raging in front of the
that thing that human stole on fire is
what’s going to allow you to build
something
that the world has never seen before but
it starts with that dream it starts with
your willingness to cultivate that to
think about it to allow yourself to do
that because so many people stop
themselves they think they’re an addict
fit they think that they can never do it
and even if that is a fact it’s not
something that’s gonna help you live a
life that excites you it’s not something
that’s gonna help you excite other
people but one thing that will do that
is the dream so right now allow yourself
that simply to dream
I’ve got a very special time bill you
bought us clips around not wasting time
that I think you’re really going to
enjoy but first I want you to make the
commitment of the day you watch this
video you learned a lot from Tom
don’t just watch another video what are
you committing to making a change in
your life or in your business leave it
down the count’s below I’m really
curious to find out thank you guys so
much for watching I believe in you I
hope we continue to believe in yourself
and whatever you’re one where it is much
love I’ll see you soon and enjoy the
bonus clip
he said if you can dream it you can do
it now what makes me laugh as I know
right now some of the people listening
to that they say that’s bulls they’re
just limits to what humans can do and I
get that response I understand it I used
to respond to everything like that I
used to see only the difficulty I used
to see only the ways in which it
couldn’t work out and I couldn’t see I
was literally blinded by fear I was
blinded by some bizarre sense of pride
that wanted to justify my limited
existence that didn’t want to have to
face that I couldn’t be doing more that
I couldn’t be more that my life was
somehow less than what it could be
and so I would laugh at quotes like that
and I know right now of the chills I
know right now there are people that are
laughing at that and all they can think
about are the limits all they can think
about are the things that prove him
wrong and guess what he is wrong
there really are limits but if you waste
your time focused on that you’re never
going to create the momentum that you
need to actually make something come
true in your life you can build
virtually anything but if you get hung
up on the virtual part if you let that
stop you if you immediately go to the
things that ultimately limit you and
hold you back that is where you’re gonna
stay forever because if you argue for
your limitations guess what my friend
they become
and congratulations you now get to live
in that box you get to live in that
self-defined prison but if like Teddy
Roosevelt said instead of that you keep
your eyes on the Stars and your feet on
the ground and you don’t pack like
somebody who can’t see that sure there
are limits there are edges to this
universe but you’re looking not at that
you’re looking at how you really execute
you’re dreaming big and you’re
remembering that your feet ultimately is
that contact point it is where the
rubber meets the road it is that moment
of doing and so if instead of rejecting
it because your feet must stay planted
on the ground remember that in keeping
your feet on the ground that’s the
moment of action that’s the moment of
doing something about it
that’s the moment of seeing the
possibilities and then moving doing
something making it real so right now
give up on those weird mental mechanisms
that make you actually want to fight for
the things that aren’t possible to get
people to believe in it to get people to
understand why you’ve chosen to stand
still
instead of that convince yourself that
you should be moving
and don’t do what you know you’re
destined to do
[Music]
only the one won-soon ones one was long
yeah
the most important work ever if you had
to think of one word that’s most
important to you or that sums you Apple
that would be like a little beacon pay
believe nation if you want to know what
the most important one word is for Tony
Robbins Gary Vaynerchuk Oprah Winfrey
will.i.am and Howard Schultz I have a
very special secret video for you check
the description for details
[Music]
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