peace and Finnick waters diving deep
once again we are out here in nature
baby beautiful deep divers how is your
day going are you feeling a bit shaky
baby maybe a little bit tiny bit how to
finally get the confidence to approach
someone you are attracted to that girl
guy woman man or even the cat down the
road let’s just well breathing getting
that good ass prana baby now I got a
question that came in Ralph
yes how can I finally get the confidence
to approach someone I am really deeply
attracted to okay it’s like Ralph yes
I’m almost there I’m like just about to
go and talk to them but then a voice in
the back of my mind says don’t do it
pull back go back go back is that you
feel like I really want to talk to them
but I I’m being told to pull back and we
ain’t even had breakfast yet can I get a
hello beautiful deep divers let me share
with you was help me along my journey
this is what we call approach anxiety
and this is sexology water fire hot cold
yin-yang daddy’s home we’re back so let
me share with you what’s helped me along
my journey I used to be really really
shy like I would really want to talk to
someone get to know them and then be
stopped in my tracks and then ask myself
why why can’t I do it like why will I
ever be able to do it I don’t know and
they’ve gone away and I feel like a
loser right now okay
but I found the mysterious heck
now I can talk to anybody you might be
very attracted to someone or maybe you
just want to be friends with them or
maybe you’re just curious like I am
sometimes so so what I call first and
foremost learn about the 10 second rule
and that is you have 10 seconds to go
and approach someone you are attracted
to and if you don’t do it in those 10
seconds forget about it because you want
doing here so let’s count it down right
10 9 8 7 you’re still standing there 10
seconds later and you’re still standing
there an hour later you’re still
standing there and they’ve gone you see
why do you have to act instead of just
think because so many of us we get
caught upstairs we get caught in what I
call the analyzing mind analytical mind
and analysis is paralysis slow motion
this side the longer you stare at
someone without doing anything about it
the scarier they appear it’s now a great
big task and chore like oh my gosh will
I ever be able to talk to that person
I’m going to talk to that person no I’m
not because I’m just standing here and
now they’ve done Buddha said the problem
is you think you’ve got time but you
don’t if you wait too long you might
miss the wave you might miss that
opportunity of meeting someone amazing
you see why are so many of us scared
when we really want to talk to someone
but we hear that voice pull back because
of our ego the ego never wants to look
bad so it will do whatever it can to
protect you
so it’s what I call foolish pride you
are afraid of being rejected and that’s
why you’re attracted to them you are so
attracted to them but you haven’t spoken
to them so you have to lose lose this
fear of rejection once you can lose the
feel for rejection because nobody can
slow motion this side let’s just say
there are ten people you really are
intrigued about and you’re approaching
each one I guarantee you at least one is
gonna reject you like really cold like
don’t talk to me and it’s really gonna
hurt it’s gonna hurt your ego but I
guarantee you at least another one
person is gonna be like come here for a
hug come here let’s go for a smoothie
okay everyone is different some people
it’s got nothing to do with you how
other people treat you but realize
you’ve got nothing to lose but
everything to gain remind yourself this
that it doesn’t matter because like by
next week
all of this would have been forgotten
like it’s not that serious I remind
myself when I was like 14 I was like
really attracted to this girl really
attracted to this girl and like I’m like
spending like four hours just thinking
what to say and everyone’s gone and then
tomorrow comes and I’m like oh my gosh I
just missed a moment when I was 20 I did
the same thing when I was 40 I did the
so realize you just got to do it
analysis is paralysis it’s time to move
into your body become comma in your body
by well breathing in that good ass prana
baby relax your muscles relax your
shoulders and then proceed to talk to
them they won’t be as scary as you think
I promise there won’t be that scary what
makes them scary is this story you have
created this story you have created
you’ve painted a picture of them in your
mind which is not actually them so what
happens you’re creating this story about
them and you haven’t even spoken to them
you are assuming but I’ve learned that
assumptions make bad conclusions because
most of the time we get it wrong unless
you’re a psychic reader mind reader so
stop assuming who people are and allow
people to reveal themselves to you and
you beautiful Deep Diver
will be pleasantly surprised do you know
how many times I’m like I bet this
person is like this but I’m not going to
talk to them then I actually have the
courage to talk to them and then I
realize they’re totally not like they’re
right sometimes it’s good and sometimes
it’s terrible right to get the
confidence to approach someone you are
attracted to realize this you have to
ascribing intent that is to feel that
what everybody is doing is because of
you stop feeling the world revolves
around you stop taking everything so
personally stop thinking that ok this
person is like doing that because of me
know move freely and realize how people
respond to you it’s not even that
personal is how they are acting
according to their story
okay so realize one of the four
agreements is not personal and that’s
how you really get confidence if someone
wants to talk to you they will if they
don’t they don’t have to there’s no
contract for that right right right you
see seven day vegan challenge was helped
me along my journey is to stuff a whole
lot of pomegranate in my mouth before I
talk to someone eat for confidence when
you feel better about yourself you’re
feeling a bit sexy now you’ll have the
confidence to talk to anybody when you
feel crappy inside because you’re eating
a lot of processed meats greasy fried
foods it takes away your confidence
because you’re like you know you are not
at your best and why would you want to
slow motion this side so start getting
the green juice start feeling better
about yourself by eating a healthier
plant-based diet so you have the
confidence to look anybody in the eye
and say I got this right you see many
times what I’ve realized along my
journey is that we have approach anxiety
when we are placing people on pedestals
remind yourself everybody took a dump
today had to break it to you well maybe
you didn’t actually not yet but you will
eventually right right right
so stop placing people on a pedestal I
hear time and time again Oh Ralph I
great people ladies tell me this right
right ladies tell me Ralph I gray people
like his five he’s a seven he’s a ten
guys told me the same thing like I grade
women like she’s a ten
she’s a full-stop grading people have
you ever wondered why you can talk to
someone you’re not attracted to very
easily most of the time but once you’re
really attracted to someone you start
palms are sweaty start feeling nervous
mom spaghetti no this is not lose
yourself but it feels like it right
because you really really really really
really really really really really
really want to do it now it’s creating
more anxiety
so stop placing people on a pedestal
start treating everybody as the same
realize we are all one and nobody is too
big for you to talk to them right so
just learn that simple powerful practice
of talking to anybody and treating
everybody as equal you see what’s helped
me along my journey approach someone I’m
attracted to to get the confidence is to
really learn how to practice
approaching people is about practicing
and what happens a lot of us a quart of
God right a lot of us support of God and
why we caught of God because we haven’t
practiced enough so there is no better
time to practice than if you meet
someone
10 seconds go and every single day you
do you can do 30 seconds first ok let’s
do a minute no ok let’s do 10 minutes
first you’ve got 10 minutes to do it and
they’ll probably go and then you’re like
okay I better listen to Ralph and do 30
seconds and then 10 seconds because you
might miss them right and just say they
aren’t that scary right and the more you
practice the easier it will be learn to
talk to anybody talk to strangers forget
about what your parents say talk to
strangers oh hi what’s up right to get
the confidence to approach anybody
especially if you’re attracted to them
is to forget about the story the story
of who you think they are forget about
the story of who you think you are and
realize you are just energy having a
human experience
you see was helped me along my journey
is to realize this many times we freeze
when we have a low self-esteem we freeze
when we have a lack of confidence and
the only way to build confidence is to
stop having what the great psychologist
Carl Rogers said unconditional positive
what do I call it I call it
unconditional positive self-acceptance
like I accept myself a hundred percent
therefore I can talk to anybody realize
this that when you meet people they are
probably just as shy as you anyway
okay stop thinking like you’re the only
one that’s shy and lacks confidence
right everybody is shy at first but
realize you whoever like says the first
sentence usually can really steer the
conversation so you’re doing a great
thing a courageous act is what you are
partaking in okay because you said the
first word like if you approach someone
that takes a lot of guts be proud of
yourself
but realize that they’re probably just
as shy as you you got to realize that
you don’t want to appear to be too
creepy and how people appear to be
creepy is when they are just staring and
staring and staring and staring and
staring and staring you’re freaking me
out right now
right that’s why a lot of people get
spooked out you look at someone too long
they might hit you with their handbag
I’ve learnt is that you don’t want to
appear to be too creepy
so go in casual and how I do this if you
just want to make friends with someone
you’re attracted to them in a romantic
way talk about what is happening the
present moment there’s a palm tree up
there a plane going up up there
right beautiful weather right now talk
about what is happening
forget about your resume forget about
your your CV forget about all your
credentials like most people the reason
why you are so anxious in approaching
someone is because you think you have to
slow motion inside do you know ladies
tell me all the time Ralph there’s
there’s these guys trying to approach me
and it’s like they think just by pulling
up in a porch by pulling up in a Porsche
is really gonna impress me
right and it doesn’t in fact it
backfires like stop bragging about how
much money you make where you work
because nobody cares right
talk about what is happening right now
and you’ll find you’ll be more confident
because sometimes you might have so much
materialistic things and you still feel
even more anxious right so realize you
don’t have to start explaining to people
what you do and how successful you are
and where you work might just go in
simple and talk about what is actually
happening and the reason why that is
powerful is that because it pulls you
into the present moment the here and now
slow motion in this side how to get
confident to approach someone you’re
attracted to the girl guy woman man or
even cat down the road realize that
you’ve got to be a good listener ever
been in a conversation with someone and
it’s definitely not a conversation it is
not a conversation right now because
they’re just talking because they’re so
shy and nervous they just keep talking
they forget to listen then it becomes
one-sided and then you’re like bye I’m
out of here
right so learn how to listen that’s how
you develop confidence sometimes there
is an incredible power in silence you
get more confident by observing the
silence when you are approaching someone
when you finally get there and you’re
talking okay if there’s a bit of silence
observe the silence that awkward silence
and don’t try and just like fill the
void instantly just observe it and say
that’s true confidence right I always do
that with the cat down the road like
it’s just sigh
and I’m so confident right many of us we
have approach anxiety because we’re
looking for a prop like can you put your
your iPhone down for one second your
Android down for one second and focus on
what is actually happening focus on what
is happening listen for what they are
saying move into all of your senses and
that’s how to get more confident you
lose confidence when you’re like on your
phone and you’re like I really want to
approach them but you’re on your phone
right now right realize this that
approaching someone is ultimately a fear
and it’s false evidence appearing real
that’s what fear stands for the acronym
we are afraid because we are afraid of
the unknown we are afraid because we
might get rejected we are afraid because
we might experience ego death which is
when someone’s like get out of my face
and you’re like I wanted to approach you
and say hi and they’re like I don’t care
but you will meet someone who is
vibrating at the same frequency as you
and that’s why it’s worth it do you know
how many stories there are of people who
have met each other and they’re like
well he just came up to me and I’m like
I didn’t really want to talk to him at
first I didn’t want to talk to him at
first but he just did it he had the
courage so now I’m with him and I’ve
been married to him for like 50 years
whoa whoa whoa that’s what happens when
you have that courage to stop thinking
and start acting realize this that it’s
just a story in your mind of who you
think this person is break free of the
Maya the illusion that you’ve implanted
in your mind that this person is too
he’s too
special for me to talk to this person is
like a monster right because that’s how
that’s how you’ve painted them in your
mind like that’s why you can’t talk to
them realize hey just relax it’s me it’s
me
right that’s what you’ve got to do right
I’ve realized this that feel the fear
and do it anyway and you’ve got ten
seconds to do it but feel the fear
let your heart pump really fast and feel
the fear and say oh I’m so scared right
now but I’m gonna dive in because I’m
gonna dive in and I want a really
experience being afraid that’s what you
got to do want to experience being
afraid want to experience shaking in
your boots want to experience the
feeling of knowing that you might be
accepted or you might be rejected go in
for the thrill of life right and then
well you just say oh so get to be a live
baby
can I get a Hello pair beautiful deep
divers we are out here in nature just do
it just do it just do it go for it go
for it go for it we’re just well
breathing in that good ass prana baby if
there is someone you really want to talk
to and approach them do it right now
because if you don’t do it right now you
may never ever get the same opportunity
again I’ve learned it the hard way
but right now I know if there’s someone
I want to talk to I’ve got to do it
right now
because you might miss the wave and they
might marry someone else right let’s
just well gosh getting emotional out
here breathing in that good aspirin have
a beautiful day deep dives have a
beautiful day
infinite waters diving deep once again
stay well stay healthy peace you I bet
it row well it’s about time good on you [Music]
once again we are out here in nature
baby beautiful deep divers how is your
day going are you feeling a bit shaky
baby maybe a little bit tiny bit how to
finally get the confidence to approach
someone you are attracted to that girl
guy woman man or even the cat down the
road let’s just well breathing getting
that good ass prana baby now I got a
question that came in Ralph
yes how can I finally get the confidence
to approach someone I am really deeply
attracted to okay it’s like Ralph yes
I’m almost there I’m like just about to
go and talk to them but then a voice in
the back of my mind says don’t do it
pull back go back go back is that you
feel like I really want to talk to them
but I I’m being told to pull back and we
ain’t even had breakfast yet can I get a
hello beautiful deep divers let me share
with you was help me along my journey
this is what we call approach anxiety
and this is sexology water fire hot cold
yin-yang daddy’s home we’re back so let
me share with you what’s helped me along
my journey I used to be really really
shy like I would really want to talk to
someone get to know them and then be
stopped in my tracks and then ask myself
why why can’t I do it like why will I
ever be able to do it I don’t know and
they’ve gone away and I feel like a
loser right now okay
but I found the mysterious heck
now I can talk to anybody you might be
very attracted to someone or maybe you
just want to be friends with them or
maybe you’re just curious like I am
sometimes so so what I call first and
foremost learn about the 10 second rule
and that is you have 10 seconds to go
and approach someone you are attracted
to and if you don’t do it in those 10
seconds forget about it because you want
doing here so let’s count it down right
10 9 8 7 you’re still standing there 10
seconds later and you’re still standing
there an hour later you’re still
standing there and they’ve gone you see
why do you have to act instead of just
think because so many of us we get
caught upstairs we get caught in what I
call the analyzing mind analytical mind
and analysis is paralysis slow motion
this side the longer you stare at
someone without doing anything about it
the scarier they appear it’s now a great
big task and chore like oh my gosh will
I ever be able to talk to that person
I’m going to talk to that person no I’m
not because I’m just standing here and
now they’ve done Buddha said the problem
is you think you’ve got time but you
don’t if you wait too long you might
miss the wave you might miss that
opportunity of meeting someone amazing
you see why are so many of us scared
when we really want to talk to someone
but we hear that voice pull back because
of our ego the ego never wants to look
bad so it will do whatever it can to
protect you
so it’s what I call foolish pride you
are afraid of being rejected and that’s
why you’re attracted to them you are so
attracted to them but you haven’t spoken
to them so you have to lose lose this
fear of rejection once you can lose the
feel for rejection because nobody can
slow motion this side let’s just say
there are ten people you really are
intrigued about and you’re approaching
each one I guarantee you at least one is
gonna reject you like really cold like
don’t talk to me and it’s really gonna
hurt it’s gonna hurt your ego but I
guarantee you at least another one
person is gonna be like come here for a
hug come here let’s go for a smoothie
okay everyone is different some people
it’s got nothing to do with you how
other people treat you but realize
you’ve got nothing to lose but
everything to gain remind yourself this
that it doesn’t matter because like by
next week
all of this would have been forgotten
like it’s not that serious I remind
myself when I was like 14 I was like
really attracted to this girl really
attracted to this girl and like I’m like
spending like four hours just thinking
what to say and everyone’s gone and then
tomorrow comes and I’m like oh my gosh I
just missed a moment when I was 20 I did
the same thing when I was 40 I did the
so realize you just got to do it
analysis is paralysis it’s time to move
into your body become comma in your body
by well breathing in that good ass prana
baby relax your muscles relax your
shoulders and then proceed to talk to
them they won’t be as scary as you think
I promise there won’t be that scary what
makes them scary is this story you have
created this story you have created
you’ve painted a picture of them in your
mind which is not actually them so what
happens you’re creating this story about
them and you haven’t even spoken to them
you are assuming but I’ve learned that
assumptions make bad conclusions because
most of the time we get it wrong unless
you’re a psychic reader mind reader so
stop assuming who people are and allow
people to reveal themselves to you and
you beautiful Deep Diver
will be pleasantly surprised do you know
how many times I’m like I bet this
person is like this but I’m not going to
talk to them then I actually have the
courage to talk to them and then I
realize they’re totally not like they’re
right sometimes it’s good and sometimes
it’s terrible right to get the
confidence to approach someone you are
attracted to realize this you have to
ascribing intent that is to feel that
what everybody is doing is because of
you stop feeling the world revolves
around you stop taking everything so
personally stop thinking that ok this
person is like doing that because of me
know move freely and realize how people
respond to you it’s not even that
personal is how they are acting
according to their story
okay so realize one of the four
agreements is not personal and that’s
how you really get confidence if someone
wants to talk to you they will if they
don’t they don’t have to there’s no
contract for that right right right you
see seven day vegan challenge was helped
me along my journey is to stuff a whole
lot of pomegranate in my mouth before I
talk to someone eat for confidence when
you feel better about yourself you’re
feeling a bit sexy now you’ll have the
confidence to talk to anybody when you
feel crappy inside because you’re eating
a lot of processed meats greasy fried
foods it takes away your confidence
because you’re like you know you are not
at your best and why would you want to
slow motion this side so start getting
the green juice start feeling better
about yourself by eating a healthier
plant-based diet so you have the
confidence to look anybody in the eye
and say I got this right you see many
times what I’ve realized along my
journey is that we have approach anxiety
when we are placing people on pedestals
remind yourself everybody took a dump
today had to break it to you well maybe
you didn’t actually not yet but you will
eventually right right right
so stop placing people on a pedestal I
hear time and time again Oh Ralph I
great people ladies tell me this right
right ladies tell me Ralph I gray people
like his five he’s a seven he’s a ten
guys told me the same thing like I grade
women like she’s a ten
she’s a full-stop grading people have
you ever wondered why you can talk to
someone you’re not attracted to very
easily most of the time but once you’re
really attracted to someone you start
palms are sweaty start feeling nervous
mom spaghetti no this is not lose
yourself but it feels like it right
because you really really really really
really really really really really
really want to do it now it’s creating
more anxiety
so stop placing people on a pedestal
start treating everybody as the same
realize we are all one and nobody is too
big for you to talk to them right so
just learn that simple powerful practice
of talking to anybody and treating
everybody as equal you see what’s helped
me along my journey approach someone I’m
attracted to to get the confidence is to
really learn how to practice
approaching people is about practicing
and what happens a lot of us a quart of
God right a lot of us support of God and
why we caught of God because we haven’t
practiced enough so there is no better
time to practice than if you meet
someone
10 seconds go and every single day you
do you can do 30 seconds first ok let’s
do a minute no ok let’s do 10 minutes
first you’ve got 10 minutes to do it and
they’ll probably go and then you’re like
okay I better listen to Ralph and do 30
seconds and then 10 seconds because you
might miss them right and just say they
aren’t that scary right and the more you
practice the easier it will be learn to
talk to anybody talk to strangers forget
about what your parents say talk to
strangers oh hi what’s up right to get
the confidence to approach anybody
especially if you’re attracted to them
is to forget about the story the story
of who you think they are forget about
the story of who you think you are and
realize you are just energy having a
human experience
you see was helped me along my journey
is to realize this many times we freeze
when we have a low self-esteem we freeze
when we have a lack of confidence and
the only way to build confidence is to
stop having what the great psychologist
Carl Rogers said unconditional positive
what do I call it I call it
unconditional positive self-acceptance
like I accept myself a hundred percent
therefore I can talk to anybody realize
this that when you meet people they are
probably just as shy as you anyway
okay stop thinking like you’re the only
one that’s shy and lacks confidence
right everybody is shy at first but
realize you whoever like says the first
sentence usually can really steer the
conversation so you’re doing a great
thing a courageous act is what you are
partaking in okay because you said the
first word like if you approach someone
that takes a lot of guts be proud of
yourself
but realize that they’re probably just
as shy as you you got to realize that
you don’t want to appear to be too
creepy and how people appear to be
creepy is when they are just staring and
staring and staring and staring and
staring and staring you’re freaking me
out right now
right that’s why a lot of people get
spooked out you look at someone too long
they might hit you with their handbag
I’ve learnt is that you don’t want to
appear to be too creepy
so go in casual and how I do this if you
just want to make friends with someone
you’re attracted to them in a romantic
way talk about what is happening the
present moment there’s a palm tree up
there a plane going up up there
right beautiful weather right now talk
about what is happening
forget about your resume forget about
your your CV forget about all your
credentials like most people the reason
why you are so anxious in approaching
someone is because you think you have to
slow motion inside do you know ladies
tell me all the time Ralph there’s
there’s these guys trying to approach me
and it’s like they think just by pulling
up in a porch by pulling up in a Porsche
is really gonna impress me
right and it doesn’t in fact it
backfires like stop bragging about how
much money you make where you work
because nobody cares right
talk about what is happening right now
and you’ll find you’ll be more confident
because sometimes you might have so much
materialistic things and you still feel
even more anxious right so realize you
don’t have to start explaining to people
what you do and how successful you are
and where you work might just go in
simple and talk about what is actually
happening and the reason why that is
powerful is that because it pulls you
into the present moment the here and now
slow motion in this side how to get
confident to approach someone you’re
attracted to the girl guy woman man or
even cat down the road realize that
you’ve got to be a good listener ever
been in a conversation with someone and
it’s definitely not a conversation it is
not a conversation right now because
they’re just talking because they’re so
shy and nervous they just keep talking
they forget to listen then it becomes
one-sided and then you’re like bye I’m
out of here
right so learn how to listen that’s how
you develop confidence sometimes there
is an incredible power in silence you
get more confident by observing the
silence when you are approaching someone
when you finally get there and you’re
talking okay if there’s a bit of silence
observe the silence that awkward silence
and don’t try and just like fill the
void instantly just observe it and say
that’s true confidence right I always do
that with the cat down the road like
it’s just sigh
and I’m so confident right many of us we
have approach anxiety because we’re
looking for a prop like can you put your
your iPhone down for one second your
Android down for one second and focus on
what is actually happening focus on what
is happening listen for what they are
saying move into all of your senses and
that’s how to get more confident you
lose confidence when you’re like on your
phone and you’re like I really want to
approach them but you’re on your phone
right now right realize this that
approaching someone is ultimately a fear
and it’s false evidence appearing real
that’s what fear stands for the acronym
we are afraid because we are afraid of
the unknown we are afraid because we
might get rejected we are afraid because
we might experience ego death which is
when someone’s like get out of my face
and you’re like I wanted to approach you
and say hi and they’re like I don’t care
but you will meet someone who is
vibrating at the same frequency as you
and that’s why it’s worth it do you know
how many stories there are of people who
have met each other and they’re like
well he just came up to me and I’m like
I didn’t really want to talk to him at
first I didn’t want to talk to him at
first but he just did it he had the
courage so now I’m with him and I’ve
been married to him for like 50 years
whoa whoa whoa that’s what happens when
you have that courage to stop thinking
and start acting realize this that it’s
just a story in your mind of who you
think this person is break free of the
Maya the illusion that you’ve implanted
in your mind that this person is too
he’s too
special for me to talk to this person is
like a monster right because that’s how
that’s how you’ve painted them in your
mind like that’s why you can’t talk to
them realize hey just relax it’s me it’s
me
right that’s what you’ve got to do right
I’ve realized this that feel the fear
and do it anyway and you’ve got ten
seconds to do it but feel the fear
let your heart pump really fast and feel
the fear and say oh I’m so scared right
now but I’m gonna dive in because I’m
gonna dive in and I want a really
experience being afraid that’s what you
got to do want to experience being
afraid want to experience shaking in
your boots want to experience the
feeling of knowing that you might be
accepted or you might be rejected go in
for the thrill of life right and then
well you just say oh so get to be a live
baby
can I get a Hello pair beautiful deep
divers we are out here in nature just do
it just do it just do it go for it go
for it go for it we’re just well
breathing in that good ass prana baby if
there is someone you really want to talk
to and approach them do it right now
because if you don’t do it right now you
may never ever get the same opportunity
again I’ve learned it the hard way
but right now I know if there’s someone
I want to talk to I’ve got to do it
right now
because you might miss the wave and they
might marry someone else right let’s
just well gosh getting emotional out
here breathing in that good aspirin have
a beautiful day deep dives have a
beautiful day
infinite waters diving deep once again
stay well stay healthy peace you I bet
it row well it’s about time good on you [Music]
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