do you remember when we were kids our
parents or maybe teachers would tell us
hey be careful with peer pressure
because you know other peers could
pressure you to do things that you don’t
want to do so it’s a bad thing right now
as you as you age and you become an
adult what if I told you peer pressure
is a wonderful thing as long as you
choose the right peers it’s the most
incredible thing because they could
pressure you to do great things with
your life that you wouldn’t have done if
you didn’t have the right peer pressure
so based on that if you think about you
do studies you will realize that your
friends your close friends could dictate
your diet your health your marriage your
relationship your finances your
happiness all of that they can dictate
depending on the type of friends you
choose this is why today’s episode is
called how to choose great friends so
now I’m going to dive into this topic a
little bit deeper and kind of process
and ask the question that hey why is it
that some of our friends in sixth grade
we’re no longer friends well why is it
that my friend in high school that I
played you know Nintendo width and I was
consciously playing Zelda or whatever
the game you play Final Fantasy
something or Fester’s quest for some of
you guys I play feathered Super Mario
Brothers how come I’m not friends with
them anymore how come I don’t spend all
the time with them and I saw them every
single day for three years I don’t do it
anymore
is that a bad thing we’re going to
process that so today software X what is
X
how to choose great friends let’s
process it friendship goes through three
different phases phase 1 12 to 18 years
old this is when we’re trying to be
accepted you’re in school you just kind
of want to be cool you just happy you
have friends matter of fact your parents
are somewhat happy they have some
friends because you’re not alone right
you’re like hey I have 5 friends man
these guys are willing to be friends
with me this is so cool I’m being
accepted right at this phase 19 to 29
phase 2 this is experimenting phase
you’re experimenting with people you’re
experimenting with who you get along
with your experiment things you’re kind
of learning about yourself and then
phase 3 is dirty plus this is clarity
you kind of have an idea what types of
people you want to be friends with what
you like what you don’t like you you
kind of have molded into somebody that
hopefully at that age you’re somewhat
self aware of yourself now few things
that we go through here sports friends
are friends
sports and video games phase 2 partying
college military you meet them in
college you hang out in college you go
to clubs in college you drink together
your party to get in the military you
party together maybe afterwards you get
a job you got a company you’re working
out with a job and one guy becomes your
friend because you guys got to start at
the same time so those relationships are
being started here and then phase 3
you’re getting married possible maybe
you have kids you now have a job you
realize how competitive it is maybe
you’ve moved to a complete different
place so you’re no longer connected with
your friends that you were because
you’re living in a different phase
different stay because a promotion you
took so these change right now here
becomes a question here becomes a
question some people still are friends
with their high school friends when they
were 16 years old they’re still friends
with them today why is that and why is
it as some people who were friends there
those people who were inseparable they
can’t even get along or sit down
together for 20 minute conversation have
you had a conversation one of your old
friends and you sitting down with him
you’re like or 15 minutes we talk we
have nothing in common or what happened
at 17 it was all day all day every day
we got nothing in common why is that
here’s why is the evolution of
friendship the evolution of French was
very interesting if you at 16 years old
are the same with interest goals
whatever it is you’re the same at 32
years old
same same you get along if John is the
same as you are at 32 when he was that
16 you get along if John at 16 or 21 by
32
he decided to go become an entrepreneur
businessman or a lawyer or an executive
or a career path and now his friend is
also in the same pace he’s changed he’s
not the 21 year old he’s a different 31
year old he’s changed they get along but
if John at 21 that was the best that
partying so was Bobby but at 31 John is
now running a business he’s an attorney
is an executive he’s doing very well for
himself but his friend is still the same
same and change don’t get along there’s
nothing else in common so this is when
you see a friend from high school you’re
like wait a minute
how come they’re not hanging out
together anymore why has this evolution
of Princeton
am ia bad person are they bad person no
neither is good or bad they’re just no
longer connection there’s got to be a
connection so this is very important to
identify because in life as you get to
this phase and some of you may be
watching as you’re maybe at this phase
and you kind of I’m just trying to be
except I want a girlfriend to hold my
hand right and you’re going to go
through some of this and some of you
guys may be at this age right I remember
being 26 years old a agen mentor told me
something fascinating he said Patrick at
27 28 as a man weird things are going to
happen don’t take it too seriously
you’re going to start really asking some
weird questions and have too much
pressure on yourself
don’t take you too seriously and that’s
exactly what happened to me because 28
29 sometimes even men and woman they go
through the face if they’re single not
married yet is it too late maybe I
should have gone marry my friends got
married they already have two kids I
don’t have to get to talk compare
compare compare compare compare you’re
trying to live everybody else’s life
maybe your first marriage you don’t work
at compare compare compare right so now
if you’re here and you’re trying to get
clear about life this thing should be
very clear to let me help you out with
what I mean by this part here there’s
three different types of people that
benefits us for us to hang out with
people that are above us in our life
these are people that we aspire to be
one day people at the same level as us
and people below us when I say below I
don’t mean demeaning inferior just below
us they want to have our life per se
what are the benefits for each category
well people you hang out with that or
above you what is a benefit you aspire
to be like them so they challenge you
they push you you go to a restaurant a
party you around people that’ll make I
remember the first time I went to a
party this man invited me to his house
party he was turning 50 I went to his
house in Westlake I’m 20 to 23 years old
and I went over there everyone pulled up
in Ferraris Lamborghinis Jaguars I’m
pulling up in my Ford Focus it was when
I pulled up and I park all the way in
the back and I go inside this one guys
show me is 2002 2003 Harley that he had
bought just a fancy Harley that he had
silver I’ll never forget it drop-dead
gorgeous model and everyone I’m talking
to is a multi-millionaire everyone is
celebrity Hollywood actor actress
business executive and I’m not the guy
but this person invites
so I go in it was the most awkward
feeling because I got uncle people would
ask me what do you do I would say I’m a
personal trainer my cells person at
Bally Total Fitness who is this guy I
work at Bally’s which Bally’s the casino
no the Bally’s at our gym people thought
I was working at a casino so I hit a
point it was so uncomfortable for me I
got in a call I call my friends to go
should pull at the pool place in San
Fernando is called the Charles billiards
I don’t know which one of the Charles
billiards was in grundle billiards in
the San Fernando was I think the fan
Tate anyways so I went to this place
because I’m like guys we gotta go shoot
pool I was just at a party with a bunch
of millionaires who want to brag about
the kind of money to help I’m driving on
the 101 while I’m driving on the 101
never forget this I’m passing the 101
Westlake there’s a mercedes-benz
dealership I’m passing out Pat what the
hell are you thinking this is your
opportunity turn around I turn around I
exit I’ll go back to Westlake my exit
was not Chesbrough canaan ken and i go
up and i go to this guy’s house i was
the last person to leave the house I
help wash dishes I have whatever hey
Julie what do you need help with
anything I can help it I just wanted to
hear what these guys were thinking and
talking about and I was fascinated
I became great friends with him the guy
someone to prison for nine years I went
to visit him and present at a men’s
colony which men’s colonies in San Luis
Obispo right by a Morro Bay is in Morro
Bay the big I think it’s called Morro
Bay Morro Bay it’s not Palos Verdes it’s
right by Santa Barbara real nice place
anyways he was above me at that time
this is a man that was making 600k I was
aspiring to be like him he challenged me
the people push me they change me I got
a taste of it that day a former military
veteran making eight hundred bucks a
month Azhar on people making eight
hundred bucks every two hours that’s a
whole different story some mindsets
being shifted oh my gosh the benefits of
hanging around people that are the same
level as you you realize you’re not
alone it’s very important to be around
other people that like you as well
because you realize if you’re married
going through a struggle it’s great to
be on hanging out with other people that
are married go on tours because you’re
not alone if you’re an executive moving
up it’s good to hang out with other
views
if you’re running a business it’s good
to hang out with other people running to
start a business because you’re going
through same issues you are not alone
you’re trying to hire people fire people
funding running out of money going out
of business fights with wife it’s very
important supply YPO organizations like
YP or Vistage you know these guys do
very well Inc conventions they do very
well because it’s a place for you to go
and be around other entrepreneurs that
are struggling with the same things and
people below you when you hang out with
them it makes you realize that you have
value to bring to other people so you
can lift people up that feels good when
you do that now the bad thing if you do
too much where people below you
they pull you down if you only hang
around people that make you feel
superior your ego goes big but you
actually decrease in your status in life
and you go lower and lower lower and if
you only hang around people that are the
same level as you guess what happens no
peer pressure
what peer pressure if I have people that
are on me at the same status as I mean
what peer pressure do I have they don’t
have any aspirations peer pressure is
both up there above you that’s a lot of
peer pressure
a lot of peer pressure most people don’t
like it that’s why by far the person
that people talk about the most is
always here this is the people that we
make rumors about people want to talk
about these guys here all the time all
he cares about all she cares about all
they care about so now now that we have
kind of figured out this whole thing
here phases we go through evolution same
same change change change same above you
same below you now you kind of sit down
you say okay so knowing that now what do
I do
how do I pick and choose my friends what
do I do not what do I do now for myself
because some of the stats you look at a
study was done for the in Britain the
study said that the average person ends
up having 396 friends in their life that
they become friends but I’m not talking
Facebook friends I got you know 5,000
people I reached a max I have 5,000
friends those are not friends those are
just you know it’s not even
acquaintances it’s you know 10 percent
or maybe acquaintances some of them are
just following because hey we met
somewhere we just kind of hanging out so
it’s an acquaintance but 396 we become
friends with added that one in 12 stays
with you so about 33 friends stay with
us added those 33 friends euripides once
said one loyal friend
is worth more than 10,000 relatives one
loyal friend is worth more than 10,000
relatives you get a lot of friends you
got a lot of family members that are
your blood they act like they’re your
enemy sometimes right you know they
don’t want to see you when they spread
rumors and then you have this one friend
that just know you he accepts you she
accepts you you’re like man you make me
feel good but you also push me and
challenge me and you know the whole
picture you see a true friend doesn’t
stab you in the back they stab you in
the front they tell you in your face yes
and that was that it
you shouldn’t done what you just did
that was not cool me don’t talk to you
girl like that you don’t talk to your
husband like that you don’t talk to a
partner they talk too directly to your
face as well you like that that’s the
one loyal friend you find it as valuable
so how do you find these types of
friends out there a couple things to
keep in mind number one
raise your standards very simple raise
your standards on who becomes a great
friend to you when I say raise your
standards you choose who becomes a great
friend that you want to be friends with
the standards comes over here you choose
who it is and how do you raise your
standards by being selective on who you
want your friends to be so how do you
become selective you know as you become
friends to other people then you kind of
going through and look at it as a
process of a filtering process you got
to be out there on other people because
studies have shown people with larger
networks live longer because people with
larger networks have more people that
support them
hey we believe in you were praying for
you everything’s going to be okay it’s
fine and you get 75 text messages when
you’re sick it’s better than when you
get one text message when it’s your
birthday they came I Love You Man happy
birthday you always make me feel so good
you feel good you want to live longer
this is why grandfather who’s 74 years
old with five grandkids looks at her and
says I want to live 10 more years even
though I’ve had 13 heart attacks aka my
father he’s at 13 our detects six
angiograms three angio plastics three
stents in his heart he’s still living he
had his heart attack in 1993 23 years
ago but there’s a reason to live when
you have a larger network of friends you
want to live longer so very simple be
selective raise your standards find
friends that have common goals that if
you have aspirations they all have
aspirations find friends that have
common interests if you like sports they
like sports you like politics they like
politics I have friends that are
Democrats and friends that are
Republican have friends that are
independent
our friends that don’t believe in God
have friends I believe in God I friends
that are Christian I friend that are
Jewish I have friends that are atheist
agnostic that part doesn’t necessarily
dictate my friendship with them as much
as if I believe in living a life with
character integrity and they have that
as well that’s values values doesn’t
necessarily mean exact religion exact
political party that doesn’t mean
anything
it means common values and common
interests and then on top of that the
other thing I would add to that is
somebody that celebrates your victories
with you somebody that celebrates their
victories with you
meaning when you’re winning they don’t
always go back and talk about their own
victories hey you won’t believe what
happened to my kid today you know let me
tell you my gosh that’s so cool
instantly well let me tell you what my
kid come on I mean it’s like I’m talking
about my kid man just celebrate with me
I’m just trying to be transparent I want
somebody to say oh my gosh be interested
you know it’s and you know some people
can’t take that and something will just
immediate on it that’s not that’s maybe
a friend but it’s not like a friend
friend you’re choosing that celebrates
their victories with you
acceptance be a great friend is what I
would tell you as well when you when you
are a great friend yourself to other
people you know they will be the same to
you as well in life look quantity
quality this is the one area where
quality matters it’s great to have a
large network of friends don’t get me
wrong it’s very cool to have a large
network of friends where you know I had
a my father-in-law my sister’s husband’s
father when he passed away I will never
forget when I went to his funeral and
they had to do the funeral three four or
five different times because of how many
people wanted to come and visit his
funeral he was a Walter Cronkite of the
Persian community okay
mr. Sabich Imani okay and every time I
was around him he was so kind everyone
loved this man he was so kind he was
loved by the world he was one of shots
favorite people he spent so much time
with the shot he’s not around with us
god bless his soul
my brother-in-law CEO Mac I call him a
saint the for his the only guy metal my
sister was dating I met this guy said
this is the guy he’s a saint I’ve never
met a man like this before
when his father passed away was very
difficult
to his funeral thousands of people
showed up and my brother-in-law took it
like a I mean Hugh see I’m a Colette the
entire thing I was so proud of him when
I saw him I was watching his entire
mannerisms like he said I am running
this family and I want to make sure I do
my part to represent my father properly
but here’s a man that died with a large
network of people that cared for him and
he had a group of friends that also
cared for me as well that were very
close to him that’s really a big part of
life if you’re going to make millions
you’re going to make billions and you
have nobody to talk to about you have
nobody to share your struggles and your
victories with it’s lonely what’s the
purpose of it you got to be able to do
those things so it’s important that as
it is to marry the right person as
important as it is to marry the right
person if you choose to get married it
is just as important to befriend the
right people that give you the right
kind of peer pressure that challenge you
to improve and grow and just make sure
when you find friends like that let me
tell you make sure when you find friends
like that make sure you keep them for a
very very long time hopefully till the
day you die because friends like that
are very very very difficult listen very
very very difficult to find when you do
find it so this is my process and on
friendship you know conversations like
this people ask mariana will sit down so
let’s process this whole friendship
thing today we did it we decide to turn
it into an episode so if you got any
questions about or thoughts about this
comment on the bottom or you let me get
our pillow here we’ve been talking about
this whole pillow thing that team talked
about we need a new pillow so a lot of
people are submitting their pillows by
the end of the year we’re going to
choose a new pillow to replace this
pillow will keep this pillow up top but
this one’s going to replace this will
it’ll be replaced by a new pillow and
you can send your new pillow anybody out
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tame and subscribe’ pillow with the
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want it to be the same colors of item
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address will also be on the bottom your
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everybody take care bye bye [Music]
parents or maybe teachers would tell us
hey be careful with peer pressure
because you know other peers could
pressure you to do things that you don’t
want to do so it’s a bad thing right now
as you as you age and you become an
adult what if I told you peer pressure
is a wonderful thing as long as you
choose the right peers it’s the most
incredible thing because they could
pressure you to do great things with
your life that you wouldn’t have done if
you didn’t have the right peer pressure
so based on that if you think about you
do studies you will realize that your
friends your close friends could dictate
your diet your health your marriage your
relationship your finances your
happiness all of that they can dictate
depending on the type of friends you
choose this is why today’s episode is
called how to choose great friends so
now I’m going to dive into this topic a
little bit deeper and kind of process
and ask the question that hey why is it
that some of our friends in sixth grade
we’re no longer friends well why is it
that my friend in high school that I
played you know Nintendo width and I was
consciously playing Zelda or whatever
the game you play Final Fantasy
something or Fester’s quest for some of
you guys I play feathered Super Mario
Brothers how come I’m not friends with
them anymore how come I don’t spend all
the time with them and I saw them every
single day for three years I don’t do it
anymore
is that a bad thing we’re going to
process that so today software X what is
X
how to choose great friends let’s
process it friendship goes through three
different phases phase 1 12 to 18 years
old this is when we’re trying to be
accepted you’re in school you just kind
of want to be cool you just happy you
have friends matter of fact your parents
are somewhat happy they have some
friends because you’re not alone right
you’re like hey I have 5 friends man
these guys are willing to be friends
with me this is so cool I’m being
accepted right at this phase 19 to 29
phase 2 this is experimenting phase
you’re experimenting with people you’re
experimenting with who you get along
with your experiment things you’re kind
of learning about yourself and then
phase 3 is dirty plus this is clarity
you kind of have an idea what types of
people you want to be friends with what
you like what you don’t like you you
kind of have molded into somebody that
hopefully at that age you’re somewhat
self aware of yourself now few things
that we go through here sports friends
are friends
sports and video games phase 2 partying
college military you meet them in
college you hang out in college you go
to clubs in college you drink together
your party to get in the military you
party together maybe afterwards you get
a job you got a company you’re working
out with a job and one guy becomes your
friend because you guys got to start at
the same time so those relationships are
being started here and then phase 3
you’re getting married possible maybe
you have kids you now have a job you
realize how competitive it is maybe
you’ve moved to a complete different
place so you’re no longer connected with
your friends that you were because
you’re living in a different phase
different stay because a promotion you
took so these change right now here
becomes a question here becomes a
question some people still are friends
with their high school friends when they
were 16 years old they’re still friends
with them today why is that and why is
it as some people who were friends there
those people who were inseparable they
can’t even get along or sit down
together for 20 minute conversation have
you had a conversation one of your old
friends and you sitting down with him
you’re like or 15 minutes we talk we
have nothing in common or what happened
at 17 it was all day all day every day
we got nothing in common why is that
here’s why is the evolution of
friendship the evolution of French was
very interesting if you at 16 years old
are the same with interest goals
whatever it is you’re the same at 32
years old
same same you get along if John is the
same as you are at 32 when he was that
16 you get along if John at 16 or 21 by
32
he decided to go become an entrepreneur
businessman or a lawyer or an executive
or a career path and now his friend is
also in the same pace he’s changed he’s
not the 21 year old he’s a different 31
year old he’s changed they get along but
if John at 21 that was the best that
partying so was Bobby but at 31 John is
now running a business he’s an attorney
is an executive he’s doing very well for
himself but his friend is still the same
same and change don’t get along there’s
nothing else in common so this is when
you see a friend from high school you’re
like wait a minute
how come they’re not hanging out
together anymore why has this evolution
of Princeton
am ia bad person are they bad person no
neither is good or bad they’re just no
longer connection there’s got to be a
connection so this is very important to
identify because in life as you get to
this phase and some of you may be
watching as you’re maybe at this phase
and you kind of I’m just trying to be
except I want a girlfriend to hold my
hand right and you’re going to go
through some of this and some of you
guys may be at this age right I remember
being 26 years old a agen mentor told me
something fascinating he said Patrick at
27 28 as a man weird things are going to
happen don’t take it too seriously
you’re going to start really asking some
weird questions and have too much
pressure on yourself
don’t take you too seriously and that’s
exactly what happened to me because 28
29 sometimes even men and woman they go
through the face if they’re single not
married yet is it too late maybe I
should have gone marry my friends got
married they already have two kids I
don’t have to get to talk compare
compare compare compare compare you’re
trying to live everybody else’s life
maybe your first marriage you don’t work
at compare compare compare right so now
if you’re here and you’re trying to get
clear about life this thing should be
very clear to let me help you out with
what I mean by this part here there’s
three different types of people that
benefits us for us to hang out with
people that are above us in our life
these are people that we aspire to be
one day people at the same level as us
and people below us when I say below I
don’t mean demeaning inferior just below
us they want to have our life per se
what are the benefits for each category
well people you hang out with that or
above you what is a benefit you aspire
to be like them so they challenge you
they push you you go to a restaurant a
party you around people that’ll make I
remember the first time I went to a
party this man invited me to his house
party he was turning 50 I went to his
house in Westlake I’m 20 to 23 years old
and I went over there everyone pulled up
in Ferraris Lamborghinis Jaguars I’m
pulling up in my Ford Focus it was when
I pulled up and I park all the way in
the back and I go inside this one guys
show me is 2002 2003 Harley that he had
bought just a fancy Harley that he had
silver I’ll never forget it drop-dead
gorgeous model and everyone I’m talking
to is a multi-millionaire everyone is
celebrity Hollywood actor actress
business executive and I’m not the guy
but this person invites
so I go in it was the most awkward
feeling because I got uncle people would
ask me what do you do I would say I’m a
personal trainer my cells person at
Bally Total Fitness who is this guy I
work at Bally’s which Bally’s the casino
no the Bally’s at our gym people thought
I was working at a casino so I hit a
point it was so uncomfortable for me I
got in a call I call my friends to go
should pull at the pool place in San
Fernando is called the Charles billiards
I don’t know which one of the Charles
billiards was in grundle billiards in
the San Fernando was I think the fan
Tate anyways so I went to this place
because I’m like guys we gotta go shoot
pool I was just at a party with a bunch
of millionaires who want to brag about
the kind of money to help I’m driving on
the 101 while I’m driving on the 101
never forget this I’m passing the 101
Westlake there’s a mercedes-benz
dealership I’m passing out Pat what the
hell are you thinking this is your
opportunity turn around I turn around I
exit I’ll go back to Westlake my exit
was not Chesbrough canaan ken and i go
up and i go to this guy’s house i was
the last person to leave the house I
help wash dishes I have whatever hey
Julie what do you need help with
anything I can help it I just wanted to
hear what these guys were thinking and
talking about and I was fascinated
I became great friends with him the guy
someone to prison for nine years I went
to visit him and present at a men’s
colony which men’s colonies in San Luis
Obispo right by a Morro Bay is in Morro
Bay the big I think it’s called Morro
Bay Morro Bay it’s not Palos Verdes it’s
right by Santa Barbara real nice place
anyways he was above me at that time
this is a man that was making 600k I was
aspiring to be like him he challenged me
the people push me they change me I got
a taste of it that day a former military
veteran making eight hundred bucks a
month Azhar on people making eight
hundred bucks every two hours that’s a
whole different story some mindsets
being shifted oh my gosh the benefits of
hanging around people that are the same
level as you you realize you’re not
alone it’s very important to be around
other people that like you as well
because you realize if you’re married
going through a struggle it’s great to
be on hanging out with other people that
are married go on tours because you’re
not alone if you’re an executive moving
up it’s good to hang out with other
views
if you’re running a business it’s good
to hang out with other people running to
start a business because you’re going
through same issues you are not alone
you’re trying to hire people fire people
funding running out of money going out
of business fights with wife it’s very
important supply YPO organizations like
YP or Vistage you know these guys do
very well Inc conventions they do very
well because it’s a place for you to go
and be around other entrepreneurs that
are struggling with the same things and
people below you when you hang out with
them it makes you realize that you have
value to bring to other people so you
can lift people up that feels good when
you do that now the bad thing if you do
too much where people below you
they pull you down if you only hang
around people that make you feel
superior your ego goes big but you
actually decrease in your status in life
and you go lower and lower lower and if
you only hang around people that are the
same level as you guess what happens no
peer pressure
what peer pressure if I have people that
are on me at the same status as I mean
what peer pressure do I have they don’t
have any aspirations peer pressure is
both up there above you that’s a lot of
peer pressure
a lot of peer pressure most people don’t
like it that’s why by far the person
that people talk about the most is
always here this is the people that we
make rumors about people want to talk
about these guys here all the time all
he cares about all she cares about all
they care about so now now that we have
kind of figured out this whole thing
here phases we go through evolution same
same change change change same above you
same below you now you kind of sit down
you say okay so knowing that now what do
I do
how do I pick and choose my friends what
do I do not what do I do now for myself
because some of the stats you look at a
study was done for the in Britain the
study said that the average person ends
up having 396 friends in their life that
they become friends but I’m not talking
Facebook friends I got you know 5,000
people I reached a max I have 5,000
friends those are not friends those are
just you know it’s not even
acquaintances it’s you know 10 percent
or maybe acquaintances some of them are
just following because hey we met
somewhere we just kind of hanging out so
it’s an acquaintance but 396 we become
friends with added that one in 12 stays
with you so about 33 friends stay with
us added those 33 friends euripides once
said one loyal friend
is worth more than 10,000 relatives one
loyal friend is worth more than 10,000
relatives you get a lot of friends you
got a lot of family members that are
your blood they act like they’re your
enemy sometimes right you know they
don’t want to see you when they spread
rumors and then you have this one friend
that just know you he accepts you she
accepts you you’re like man you make me
feel good but you also push me and
challenge me and you know the whole
picture you see a true friend doesn’t
stab you in the back they stab you in
the front they tell you in your face yes
and that was that it
you shouldn’t done what you just did
that was not cool me don’t talk to you
girl like that you don’t talk to your
husband like that you don’t talk to a
partner they talk too directly to your
face as well you like that that’s the
one loyal friend you find it as valuable
so how do you find these types of
friends out there a couple things to
keep in mind number one
raise your standards very simple raise
your standards on who becomes a great
friend to you when I say raise your
standards you choose who becomes a great
friend that you want to be friends with
the standards comes over here you choose
who it is and how do you raise your
standards by being selective on who you
want your friends to be so how do you
become selective you know as you become
friends to other people then you kind of
going through and look at it as a
process of a filtering process you got
to be out there on other people because
studies have shown people with larger
networks live longer because people with
larger networks have more people that
support them
hey we believe in you were praying for
you everything’s going to be okay it’s
fine and you get 75 text messages when
you’re sick it’s better than when you
get one text message when it’s your
birthday they came I Love You Man happy
birthday you always make me feel so good
you feel good you want to live longer
this is why grandfather who’s 74 years
old with five grandkids looks at her and
says I want to live 10 more years even
though I’ve had 13 heart attacks aka my
father he’s at 13 our detects six
angiograms three angio plastics three
stents in his heart he’s still living he
had his heart attack in 1993 23 years
ago but there’s a reason to live when
you have a larger network of friends you
want to live longer so very simple be
selective raise your standards find
friends that have common goals that if
you have aspirations they all have
aspirations find friends that have
common interests if you like sports they
like sports you like politics they like
politics I have friends that are
Democrats and friends that are
Republican have friends that are
independent
our friends that don’t believe in God
have friends I believe in God I friends
that are Christian I friend that are
Jewish I have friends that are atheist
agnostic that part doesn’t necessarily
dictate my friendship with them as much
as if I believe in living a life with
character integrity and they have that
as well that’s values values doesn’t
necessarily mean exact religion exact
political party that doesn’t mean
anything
it means common values and common
interests and then on top of that the
other thing I would add to that is
somebody that celebrates your victories
with you somebody that celebrates their
victories with you
meaning when you’re winning they don’t
always go back and talk about their own
victories hey you won’t believe what
happened to my kid today you know let me
tell you my gosh that’s so cool
instantly well let me tell you what my
kid come on I mean it’s like I’m talking
about my kid man just celebrate with me
I’m just trying to be transparent I want
somebody to say oh my gosh be interested
you know it’s and you know some people
can’t take that and something will just
immediate on it that’s not that’s maybe
a friend but it’s not like a friend
friend you’re choosing that celebrates
their victories with you
acceptance be a great friend is what I
would tell you as well when you when you
are a great friend yourself to other
people you know they will be the same to
you as well in life look quantity
quality this is the one area where
quality matters it’s great to have a
large network of friends don’t get me
wrong it’s very cool to have a large
network of friends where you know I had
a my father-in-law my sister’s husband’s
father when he passed away I will never
forget when I went to his funeral and
they had to do the funeral three four or
five different times because of how many
people wanted to come and visit his
funeral he was a Walter Cronkite of the
Persian community okay
mr. Sabich Imani okay and every time I
was around him he was so kind everyone
loved this man he was so kind he was
loved by the world he was one of shots
favorite people he spent so much time
with the shot he’s not around with us
god bless his soul
my brother-in-law CEO Mac I call him a
saint the for his the only guy metal my
sister was dating I met this guy said
this is the guy he’s a saint I’ve never
met a man like this before
when his father passed away was very
difficult
to his funeral thousands of people
showed up and my brother-in-law took it
like a I mean Hugh see I’m a Colette the
entire thing I was so proud of him when
I saw him I was watching his entire
mannerisms like he said I am running
this family and I want to make sure I do
my part to represent my father properly
but here’s a man that died with a large
network of people that cared for him and
he had a group of friends that also
cared for me as well that were very
close to him that’s really a big part of
life if you’re going to make millions
you’re going to make billions and you
have nobody to talk to about you have
nobody to share your struggles and your
victories with it’s lonely what’s the
purpose of it you got to be able to do
those things so it’s important that as
it is to marry the right person as
important as it is to marry the right
person if you choose to get married it
is just as important to befriend the
right people that give you the right
kind of peer pressure that challenge you
to improve and grow and just make sure
when you find friends like that let me
tell you make sure when you find friends
like that make sure you keep them for a
very very long time hopefully till the
day you die because friends like that
are very very very difficult listen very
very very difficult to find when you do
find it so this is my process and on
friendship you know conversations like
this people ask mariana will sit down so
let’s process this whole friendship
thing today we did it we decide to turn
it into an episode so if you got any
questions about or thoughts about this
comment on the bottom or you let me get
our pillow here we’ve been talking about
this whole pillow thing that team talked
about we need a new pillow so a lot of
people are submitting their pillows by
the end of the year we’re going to
choose a new pillow to replace this
pillow will keep this pillow up top but
this one’s going to replace this will
it’ll be replaced by a new pillow and
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everybody take care bye bye [Music]
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