I thought that transitioning from female
to male would make my life harder but it
made things easier from an early age I
was made to understand what was
considered ladylike and what was not one
of my first experiences with this was
when I wanted to quit hrithik gymnastics
and join ice hockey one sport was highly
feminized had mostly female participants
and the other was male-dominated I had a
similar experience when I wanted to join
beavers and Cubs into instead of Sparks
and brownies in both cases I was told
that I couldn’t or shouldn’t because I
was a girl my gender continued to affect
my life in different ways and I didn’t
recognize what was going on all I knew
was that I was limited because I was a
girl and I accepted this I didn’t see
the injustice at the time when I first
learned about feminism I thought that
the movement was unnecessary I knew that
throughout history women had been denied
the right to vote to obtain an education
to find certain jobs but I also knew
that these issues had since been
remedied I didn’t understand why
feminists were still rallying for change
and I thought they just need to get over
it when I began my gender transition
I studied the men around me I wanted to
fit in but very quickly I recognized
that I did not want to become the
embodiment of masculinity
as I settled into my gender identity I
didn’t like the way that men mocked and
belittled the interests of women I
didn’t like the use of the word girl or
girly as an insult but in particular I
noticed the way that my gender affected
my work as a personal trainer suddenly I
had the respect of all the male gym
goers they wanted my advice and I had a
newfound confidence in sharing it I went
from being strong for a girl to just
strong but I also noticed that female
gym goers were much less likely to
approach me smile at me and even make
eye contact and I have since recognized
that this is a method of ensuring safety
because sometimes something as simple as
a smile can be misread as an invitation
I continue to notice these several
differences in my life almost every day
because of my gender identity but one of
the most gripping experiences I ever had
was when I caught myself running into my
apartment after a night at work I
remember thinking I almost looked so
foolish I’m a grown man moving with fear
I’ve got my keys in my hands and I’m
ready to defend against an assailant
when I realized what was going on my
privilege hit me like a ton of bricks as
a woman in Newfoundland and Labrador I
was four times more likely to be a
victim of harassment than I am as a man
as a woman I would always walk with my
keys in my hands I would cross the
street if I was walking alone and
approaching someone that I didn’t know I
would never ever go anywhere that was
dark and secluded and sometimes I would
even call her
a family member to comfort me as I
walked alone following my top surgery I
posted a side-by-side picture on my
Instagram account I’m one side before
the surgery with female nipples attached
to breasts society tells us that these
have to be blurred out on the other side
after the surgery with uncensored male
nipples in a two hour operation the very
same nipples went from being socially
inappropriate to socially acceptable
simply because they were no longer
associated with being a girl this was a
true awakening to the arbitrary nature
of gender bias although we know that
gender-based discrimination is unfounded
the impacts are devastating as a woman I
felt limited by both myself and others
because of my perceived gender I knew
not to assert myself to avoid certain
places and I knew not to chase certain
dreams as a man I feel that I can no
longer be open about my emotional needs
I fear that I’m gonna be pulled into
physical violence because it’s more
acceptable for guys to settle things
with their fists and I’ve been told that
I now have to follow what’s called boy
rules as a man I feel that I have to
participate in the objectification of
women if I want to fit in and
masculinity tells me that it’s not okay
to admit that I can’t do something and
that I should never ask for help it
seems as though the pursuit of this
masculine ideal is hurting us all
although I have had some losses in terms
of acceptable behavior through my gender
transition my gains in male priviledge
far outweigh those losses this is not
something that I wanted but it does put
me in a position where my voice may be
heard more clearly for someone with male
privilege it is essential to become
uncomfortable with the inequalities that
exist and to care about the subtle ways
that we perpetuate sexism on a daily
basis it’s one thing to say that you’re
not a sexist and to sit by comfortably
as a bystander who continues to benefit
from gender inequality it’s another
thing altogether to challenge the ways
that sexism is woven into our society
it’s time to unpack these stereotypes be
considerate of the individual
experiences of others and leverage any
privileges that we might have for change
your gender doesn’t define you you do
[Applause]
to male would make my life harder but it
made things easier from an early age I
was made to understand what was
considered ladylike and what was not one
of my first experiences with this was
when I wanted to quit hrithik gymnastics
and join ice hockey one sport was highly
feminized had mostly female participants
and the other was male-dominated I had a
similar experience when I wanted to join
beavers and Cubs into instead of Sparks
and brownies in both cases I was told
that I couldn’t or shouldn’t because I
was a girl my gender continued to affect
my life in different ways and I didn’t
recognize what was going on all I knew
was that I was limited because I was a
girl and I accepted this I didn’t see
the injustice at the time when I first
learned about feminism I thought that
the movement was unnecessary I knew that
throughout history women had been denied
the right to vote to obtain an education
to find certain jobs but I also knew
that these issues had since been
remedied I didn’t understand why
feminists were still rallying for change
and I thought they just need to get over
it when I began my gender transition
I studied the men around me I wanted to
fit in but very quickly I recognized
that I did not want to become the
embodiment of masculinity
as I settled into my gender identity I
didn’t like the way that men mocked and
belittled the interests of women I
didn’t like the use of the word girl or
girly as an insult but in particular I
noticed the way that my gender affected
my work as a personal trainer suddenly I
had the respect of all the male gym
goers they wanted my advice and I had a
newfound confidence in sharing it I went
from being strong for a girl to just
strong but I also noticed that female
gym goers were much less likely to
approach me smile at me and even make
eye contact and I have since recognized
that this is a method of ensuring safety
because sometimes something as simple as
a smile can be misread as an invitation
I continue to notice these several
differences in my life almost every day
because of my gender identity but one of
the most gripping experiences I ever had
was when I caught myself running into my
apartment after a night at work I
remember thinking I almost looked so
foolish I’m a grown man moving with fear
I’ve got my keys in my hands and I’m
ready to defend against an assailant
when I realized what was going on my
privilege hit me like a ton of bricks as
a woman in Newfoundland and Labrador I
was four times more likely to be a
victim of harassment than I am as a man
as a woman I would always walk with my
keys in my hands I would cross the
street if I was walking alone and
approaching someone that I didn’t know I
would never ever go anywhere that was
dark and secluded and sometimes I would
even call her
a family member to comfort me as I
walked alone following my top surgery I
posted a side-by-side picture on my
Instagram account I’m one side before
the surgery with female nipples attached
to breasts society tells us that these
have to be blurred out on the other side
after the surgery with uncensored male
nipples in a two hour operation the very
same nipples went from being socially
inappropriate to socially acceptable
simply because they were no longer
associated with being a girl this was a
true awakening to the arbitrary nature
of gender bias although we know that
gender-based discrimination is unfounded
the impacts are devastating as a woman I
felt limited by both myself and others
because of my perceived gender I knew
not to assert myself to avoid certain
places and I knew not to chase certain
dreams as a man I feel that I can no
longer be open about my emotional needs
I fear that I’m gonna be pulled into
physical violence because it’s more
acceptable for guys to settle things
with their fists and I’ve been told that
I now have to follow what’s called boy
rules as a man I feel that I have to
participate in the objectification of
women if I want to fit in and
masculinity tells me that it’s not okay
to admit that I can’t do something and
that I should never ask for help it
seems as though the pursuit of this
masculine ideal is hurting us all
although I have had some losses in terms
of acceptable behavior through my gender
transition my gains in male priviledge
far outweigh those losses this is not
something that I wanted but it does put
me in a position where my voice may be
heard more clearly for someone with male
privilege it is essential to become
uncomfortable with the inequalities that
exist and to care about the subtle ways
that we perpetuate sexism on a daily
basis it’s one thing to say that you’re
not a sexist and to sit by comfortably
as a bystander who continues to benefit
from gender inequality it’s another
thing altogether to challenge the ways
that sexism is woven into our society
it’s time to unpack these stereotypes be
considerate of the individual
experiences of others and leverage any
privileges that we might have for change
your gender doesn’t define you you do
[Applause]
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