welcome 2017 don’t imagine being my age
13 years old you’re sitting at home
alone in the family room and you’re
getting lots of texts and notifications
you’ve recently gotten into a fight with
your best friend and you chose to end
the friendship because you are unhappy
but the girls that were friends with
your best friend
quickly turned on you they’re making up
rumors and the information got back to
you almost simultaneously now you click
to get into your phone and you see
pictures of yourself with exes all over
you and you see paragraphs written by
people about how much they despise you
all over social media you weren’t sure
why this is happening either and all you
want to do is just crumble down and cry
and you almost do but then something
inside of you stops you that something
was urged to recover and move on when
this happened to me two years ago I
never would have been able to imagine
that I would have gone through that my
problems were tough to overcome and
honestly I wasn’t sure that I was always
get through them and be alright but I
had an idea to write about all these
problems not only that but to write out
the ideal solutions that may have never
come to these problems you know like the
fairy tale happily ever after endings
you might be thinking that this is
unrealistic or childish but in reality
it isn’t one big issue in this school is
that kids do not want to discuss
personal matters with guidance
counsellors it’s awkward it’s simply
uncomfortable for a kid to have to sit
in a stuffy office with an adult who
they barely even know and feel forced to
reveal their personal secrets
when I got into thinking about this it
actually started to worry me I mean if
these kids don’t want to confide in any
adults then who are they confiding in I
began to research it and I found out
that blogging actually helps socially
awkward teens they could create a
narrative out of a distressing experi
and help themselves heal by writing out
the endings the wish could have played
out in real life this brings me back to
my point about wanting to write about my
problems I figured if my peers could
read a relatable blog and be able to
connect they would have a great
alternative to seeking a guidance
counselor but before I had started this
particular project I’ve been extremely
used to doing this kind of writing in
fact a year and a half ago I started a
diary that was in your typical
confidential journal it was in the
format of a book with a table of
contents of 20 page chapters the whole
package in this diary I would write
about various topics like fears girls I
either liked or disliked and crushes in
other words I heard about all the things
a 13 year old girl would never want
published but the things that I would
never want published were the topics and
situations that so many people around me
go through you can never truly know what
is going on in somebody else’s life
especially the secrets they want to keep
hidden so I decided that I had to
sacrifice my secrets in order to help
the people surrounding me the way I did
this was I literally started a real and
interactive blog first I found a
blogging platform and then I created a
name I called my blog the great space
when I first started my blog I knew that
I was going to have to write about my
experiences but I never realized how
hard it was going to be I had to analyze
the situation I’ve been in how I got
there and how I wished it it turned out
versus how it actually turned out of
course and then I had to analyze the
situation’s of other people how they’ve
evolved and how others may have dealt
with them at first I began my project to
benefit others my goal at the beginning
of my experience was to help my peers
through situations that I had previously
had overcome but I soon came to the
realization that I was actually healing
from reading posts I think that by
writing out my stories I was able to
take into account what I truly take in
place
and from there I was able to move on and
improve myself
I did just that in one of my most
popular posts call
Tiffany Tiffany was about a very
personal story that I decided to share
on my blog the plot was similar to when
it actually happened to me I was the
best of friends with a girl let’s call
her Tiffany for now but this friendship
became uncomfortable and difficult for
me to deal with I was constantly being
pushed around and I was never treated
like I was good enough Tiffany was
changing into a cruel person that I had
never known her debate I think it’s
pretty fair to say that I wasn’t a very
happy camper
eventually Tiffany and I did grow apart
and the friendship completely changed my
point of view on social relationships
[Music]
[Music]
I wrote stories like the one I wrote
about Tiffany to inspire people to
accept and overcome traumatic situations
I even wrote the story Tiffany but from
Tiffany’s point of view I then received
emails from people I have never even met
eager to be a part of my blog I was told
various stories from taking sides and an
argument to a girl who didn’t know how
to cope with her disabled best friend
being bullied all they had to do was
just shoot me an email and the rest I
would take up on myself I wrote out
these stories from the outspoken points
of view like the bystanders and the
random people looking in on the
situation I got a glimpse into the lives
of my audience my peers being able to do
this not only made me feel comfortable
sharing my stories but it allowed me to
push myself farther knowing that there
were still people out there who were
sitting behind their screens that were
in pain just waiting to get out of it
struck me I couldn’t just leave them
stranded I had to help though there were
some complications along the way while I
was trying to create a program to boost
people’s self-esteem somebody tried to
bring down my own the person called
themselves anonymous and said some
pretty hurtful things they’re common
consisted of telling me that I wasn’t
being fair to my characters I was wrong
for writing what I did and feeling what
I felt and as you can imagine at first I
took this comment very personally but
then I thought over how I was feeling
and I realized that this comment and
future comments could be used to improve
my work my positive
back would be my source of encouragement
and then my not so positive feedback
would be used for input for my further
blog posts this one small comment
inspired me to understand my viewers the
way that I wanted to address my audience
was from multiple points of view what if
your child could understand that they
don’t have to be ashamed to be the
victim in a situation and what if your
friends and mothers and fathers and
siblings could understand what it
actually means to be a bully and real
what it really does mean to break the
cycle these are the types of lessons
that I wanted people to be able to walk
away with from my blog so in order to
improve my work I went and found an
online writing course this course was
called Terra K Harper’s writing workshop
throughout this workshop I wanted to be
fair to my characters it would be too
obvious which ones I was favoring
depending on the amount of text but they
were given to share their story
I learned tape bits of information piece
by piece
like how writing in a third person is
usually a successful way to write this
information was an extremely helpful
tool when I had to put myself in the
shoes of others in traumatic situations
my goal in the beginning of my project
was simple help others but as I was
nearing the end of my project my answer
to the question of did you achieve your
goal was anything but simple not only
had I managed to help the 2120 people
that viewed my blog but I was able to
improve myself I think that by doing
this I said an example for my audience
an example of healing that they could
follow and they did fall alright the
process of healing after creating the
blog is now only five words in my mind
face pain to heal pain in other words
you have to be willing to understand
your situation and analyze it very
carefully even if that’s tough to do
once you understand what happened in
your event you can do what you like to
move on if you would like an example
I’ll give you my I wrote posting out
blog posts and books all about my
distressing stories
and once I did that I shared those
stories for the world to see and for a
little bit of the world to recover it
took me one person taking a deep breath
and sharing her stories through the
world to make a change this change that
I made was my recovery and yours or your
child’s could be very similar
I created the opportunity for myself to
once and for all finally gain
perspective on myself everyone deserves
to feel the way I’m feeling right now
as I speak in front of you all this
evening open and free so please whether
it is creating a diary or reading a book
or even just speaking to a loved one be
sure to let out a story that you’ve been
holding in for awhile you’ll be amazed
at what that will do for you thank you
[Applause]
13 years old you’re sitting at home
alone in the family room and you’re
getting lots of texts and notifications
you’ve recently gotten into a fight with
your best friend and you chose to end
the friendship because you are unhappy
but the girls that were friends with
your best friend
quickly turned on you they’re making up
rumors and the information got back to
you almost simultaneously now you click
to get into your phone and you see
pictures of yourself with exes all over
you and you see paragraphs written by
people about how much they despise you
all over social media you weren’t sure
why this is happening either and all you
want to do is just crumble down and cry
and you almost do but then something
inside of you stops you that something
was urged to recover and move on when
this happened to me two years ago I
never would have been able to imagine
that I would have gone through that my
problems were tough to overcome and
honestly I wasn’t sure that I was always
get through them and be alright but I
had an idea to write about all these
problems not only that but to write out
the ideal solutions that may have never
come to these problems you know like the
fairy tale happily ever after endings
you might be thinking that this is
unrealistic or childish but in reality
it isn’t one big issue in this school is
that kids do not want to discuss
personal matters with guidance
counsellors it’s awkward it’s simply
uncomfortable for a kid to have to sit
in a stuffy office with an adult who
they barely even know and feel forced to
reveal their personal secrets
when I got into thinking about this it
actually started to worry me I mean if
these kids don’t want to confide in any
adults then who are they confiding in I
began to research it and I found out
that blogging actually helps socially
awkward teens they could create a
narrative out of a distressing experi
and help themselves heal by writing out
the endings the wish could have played
out in real life this brings me back to
my point about wanting to write about my
problems I figured if my peers could
read a relatable blog and be able to
connect they would have a great
alternative to seeking a guidance
counselor but before I had started this
particular project I’ve been extremely
used to doing this kind of writing in
fact a year and a half ago I started a
diary that was in your typical
confidential journal it was in the
format of a book with a table of
contents of 20 page chapters the whole
package in this diary I would write
about various topics like fears girls I
either liked or disliked and crushes in
other words I heard about all the things
a 13 year old girl would never want
published but the things that I would
never want published were the topics and
situations that so many people around me
go through you can never truly know what
is going on in somebody else’s life
especially the secrets they want to keep
hidden so I decided that I had to
sacrifice my secrets in order to help
the people surrounding me the way I did
this was I literally started a real and
interactive blog first I found a
blogging platform and then I created a
name I called my blog the great space
when I first started my blog I knew that
I was going to have to write about my
experiences but I never realized how
hard it was going to be I had to analyze
the situation I’ve been in how I got
there and how I wished it it turned out
versus how it actually turned out of
course and then I had to analyze the
situation’s of other people how they’ve
evolved and how others may have dealt
with them at first I began my project to
benefit others my goal at the beginning
of my experience was to help my peers
through situations that I had previously
had overcome but I soon came to the
realization that I was actually healing
from reading posts I think that by
writing out my stories I was able to
take into account what I truly take in
place
and from there I was able to move on and
improve myself
I did just that in one of my most
popular posts call
Tiffany Tiffany was about a very
personal story that I decided to share
on my blog the plot was similar to when
it actually happened to me I was the
best of friends with a girl let’s call
her Tiffany for now but this friendship
became uncomfortable and difficult for
me to deal with I was constantly being
pushed around and I was never treated
like I was good enough Tiffany was
changing into a cruel person that I had
never known her debate I think it’s
pretty fair to say that I wasn’t a very
happy camper
eventually Tiffany and I did grow apart
and the friendship completely changed my
point of view on social relationships
[Music]
[Music]
I wrote stories like the one I wrote
about Tiffany to inspire people to
accept and overcome traumatic situations
I even wrote the story Tiffany but from
Tiffany’s point of view I then received
emails from people I have never even met
eager to be a part of my blog I was told
various stories from taking sides and an
argument to a girl who didn’t know how
to cope with her disabled best friend
being bullied all they had to do was
just shoot me an email and the rest I
would take up on myself I wrote out
these stories from the outspoken points
of view like the bystanders and the
random people looking in on the
situation I got a glimpse into the lives
of my audience my peers being able to do
this not only made me feel comfortable
sharing my stories but it allowed me to
push myself farther knowing that there
were still people out there who were
sitting behind their screens that were
in pain just waiting to get out of it
struck me I couldn’t just leave them
stranded I had to help though there were
some complications along the way while I
was trying to create a program to boost
people’s self-esteem somebody tried to
bring down my own the person called
themselves anonymous and said some
pretty hurtful things they’re common
consisted of telling me that I wasn’t
being fair to my characters I was wrong
for writing what I did and feeling what
I felt and as you can imagine at first I
took this comment very personally but
then I thought over how I was feeling
and I realized that this comment and
future comments could be used to improve
my work my positive
back would be my source of encouragement
and then my not so positive feedback
would be used for input for my further
blog posts this one small comment
inspired me to understand my viewers the
way that I wanted to address my audience
was from multiple points of view what if
your child could understand that they
don’t have to be ashamed to be the
victim in a situation and what if your
friends and mothers and fathers and
siblings could understand what it
actually means to be a bully and real
what it really does mean to break the
cycle these are the types of lessons
that I wanted people to be able to walk
away with from my blog so in order to
improve my work I went and found an
online writing course this course was
called Terra K Harper’s writing workshop
throughout this workshop I wanted to be
fair to my characters it would be too
obvious which ones I was favoring
depending on the amount of text but they
were given to share their story
I learned tape bits of information piece
by piece
like how writing in a third person is
usually a successful way to write this
information was an extremely helpful
tool when I had to put myself in the
shoes of others in traumatic situations
my goal in the beginning of my project
was simple help others but as I was
nearing the end of my project my answer
to the question of did you achieve your
goal was anything but simple not only
had I managed to help the 2120 people
that viewed my blog but I was able to
improve myself I think that by doing
this I said an example for my audience
an example of healing that they could
follow and they did fall alright the
process of healing after creating the
blog is now only five words in my mind
face pain to heal pain in other words
you have to be willing to understand
your situation and analyze it very
carefully even if that’s tough to do
once you understand what happened in
your event you can do what you like to
move on if you would like an example
I’ll give you my I wrote posting out
blog posts and books all about my
distressing stories
and once I did that I shared those
stories for the world to see and for a
little bit of the world to recover it
took me one person taking a deep breath
and sharing her stories through the
world to make a change this change that
I made was my recovery and yours or your
child’s could be very similar
I created the opportunity for myself to
once and for all finally gain
perspective on myself everyone deserves
to feel the way I’m feeling right now
as I speak in front of you all this
evening open and free so please whether
it is creating a diary or reading a book
or even just speaking to a loved one be
sure to let out a story that you’ve been
holding in for awhile you’ll be amazed
at what that will do for you thank you
[Applause]
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