[Music]
[Applause]
the world now is too dangerous and too
beautiful for anything but love when my
daughter was born and I held my first
child in my hands something happened I
felt a love that was so strong I knew it
would never end no matter what she did
I couldn’t stop loving her and believe
me she did a lot but her misdeeds and
her childhood cruel tease never defined
her I could only look at her through the
eyes of love as this sparkling beautiful
human deserving of and capable of love
and I wonder why don’t I look at myself
that way and why don’t we look at other
people that way I know for me it’s the
mistakes that stick I’ll be having a
conversation with a group of people and
I will say ten amazing funny things and
one stupid thing and I will leave that
conversation beating myself up I am so
stupid and then I am no longer Brian
Baker amazing human I am he who says
stupid things and we do that to other
people like that someone cuts us off in
traffic and we don’t think oh I wish
they’d made a different driving choice
we think what an idiot and in an instant
we move them into a category that’s less
than human and we do it with entire
groups of people people that might hold
a view on a social issue that’s
different than ours or people that might
support a different political candidate
and it’s not that we disagree it’s that
we disdain and it’s even worse when we
are with our like-minded friends smugly
congratulating ourselves that were not
like those people you could make the
case that that is the fatal flaw in the
human condition the way that we look at
ourselves and one another not through
the lens of the best we can be
but the worst we have done and then we
magnify that worse thing so it becomes
the only thing I believe that is the
point in the story of Adam and Eve this
creation myth that’s the foundation of
three of our world’s major religions was
written 3,000 years ago to answer one
question what went wrong and in this
story God creates everything that is and
God looks at and goes this is awesome
and then God turns to the first humans
and says enjoy and everything’s gonna be
okay just don’t do one thing don’t eat
the fruit of the tree of the knowledge
of good and evil now think about that
for a moment the author could have
chosen anything as what went wrong it
could be the the knowledge of violence
or murder the knowledge of hatred if
you’re a Puritan the knowledge of
sexuality or the knowledge of religion
all kinds of things right that you could
pick as the thing that went wrong but
this author chose the knowledge of good
and evil meaning don’t take what God
created and called good and don’t take
part of it away and say well that is
evil and not just bad not just
undesirable but evil meaning without any
good in it and if something is evil not
only can we but we should destroy it
that’s the one thing this propensity
that we have to look at ourselves and
others and judge as evil and look at
what happens next in the story Adam and
Eve eat this fruit and the next thing
they do is they look at their own pure
beautiful unclosed form and they go like
this they judge themselves as evil I’m
so ugly I’m so disgusting and they hide
in shame in the bushes God comes through
the garden and every other day they
would run out of the bushes and they
would join hands with God and chat and
have a great little time but this time
they’re hiding in shame disgusted with
themselves in the bushes they say God we
can’t come out we’re naked
God’s heart breaks who told you you were
naked Adam blames Eve Eve blames the
serpent and here we are practically
unable to talk to one another looking at
each other in disgust we’re being ripped
apart by division but it doesn’t have to
be this way this story was written to
show us what’s wrong so that so that we
could change and spiritual traditions
have been teaching for centuries ways of
changing we need to start by paying
attention to our thoughts we don’t even
notice sometimes we do something
embarrassing and this voice kicks in in
our head and says things to us that we
would never say to another human out
loud you’re such an idiot
you’re so stupid and we’re half beaten
to a pulp before we even notice it’s
happening so pay attention notice it and
realize that that voice is not the voice
of God that voice is not telling
truth so let it go and if you can’t let
it go that easily and many of us can’t
then replace that voice with something
else a lyric from a psalm a scripture
the Lord is my shepherd I shall not want
I
I am marvelously and gloriously made I
was having a conversation with a group
of Tibetan Buddhists about this and one
of them said to me you know whenever
that voice kicks in in my head I say a
Hail Mary which I thought was pretty
delightful this Roman Catholic prayer
being said by this Tibetan Buddhist to
cast out the demon of these thoughts so
pay attention to your thoughts and catch
this mean voice and let it go another
thing to try is to assume that everybody
is doing the best they can we are all
paralysed by fear and anxiety and
insecurity and past trauma and the way
we’ve been raised and our prejudices and
biases we have no idea the wounds and
the burdens and the baggage that people
are carrying around I think it’s a
miracle we are as good to one another as
we are given how messed up we are I have
a friend whose granny barb used to say
everybody’s doing the best they can and
sometimes their best is pretty shitty
another spiritual practice and this one
I’m stealing from Jesus is pray for your
enemy
pray for the person you don’t like the
person that scares you pray for the
politician that you think is destroying
the world and I think when Jesus said
pray for your enemy I don’t think he
meant pray that they get hit by a bus
you know or pray that they stumble and
fall or pray that they change to think
just like you I think he meant pray the
prayer their mother would pray that they
live a long life free of suffering and
the causes of suffering now prayer is
not magic this isn’t going to change
their lives but it will change yours if
you pray for your enemy faithfully over
time your heart will change and over
time you will no longer see them just as
this enemy you will see them as a fellow
human being
perhaps tragically and painfully
paralyzed so pray for your enemies now
in all of this it helps to remember how
closely we are connected as humans there
is more that connects us as humans that
separate us now often when we connect we
connect around areas like politics or
religion or nationality or Facebook
algorithms but that’s not how we are
connected as a human family those aren’t
the connections that bridge across all
divisions the way we’re connected as
humans is by our shared brokenness and
our shared longings we all know what
it’s like to be brokenhearted we know
what it’s like to be afraid we know what
it’s like to grieve the loss of a loved
one
we know what it’s like to yearn for love
to be loved to have someone to love and
it’s that’s is the place this place of
the human heart connection our shared
brokenness and our shared longings where
we can come together as a human family
and be one I have experienced that kind
of connection in church and in yoga
studios but the place I experienced it
most significantly most acutely was at
Burning Man Burning Man is a nine-day
event where 70,000 people gather in the
Nevada desert for community of
creativity and free-spirited fun where
whatever your freak is you can get it on
and not be judged and I went to Burning
Man two years ago because my 22 year old
hippie daughter came into two tickets
and she decided to ask her old Episcopal
priest father to go with her and I
expected the partying and the music and
the dancing and the costumes and the
drinking and the nudity what I didn’t
expect was the temple there’s a temple
at Burning Man each year there’s this
beautiful large structure and then
people come from all over the world and
bring mementos they bring ashes or
photographs of loved ones wedding
dresses and they write on the walls all
week long more and more prayers get
added to the walls they write their
hopes and their dreams and their
longings and their anguish and I’d like
to share with you some of the things
that I saw written at my first Burning
Man get better dad r.i.p my mom forgive
I love you still I love you always
there was this one photograph of an
older man in a tuxedo and there was
rioting above it that said daddy I miss
you more than words could ever say you
will always be in my heart I love you
and then underneath in parentheses you
would be proud of me
there was this one black chalkboard
about this big and written in white ink
you you man who raped me
you police who didn’t believe me
you judge who laughed at me and it
went on and on and on this heartbreaking
heart-wrenching searing indictment with
an absolutely no resolution it ended
with you another I only pray each
year the pain gets lighter another I
forgive you men who raped me forgiveness
and a plea for forgiveness was a common
thread forgive me I’m sorry I’m sorry
written again and again in the walls of
the temple my anger for my father ends
now you are my blessing
hug them now prayer after prayer the
temple was the most popular place at
Burning Man everyone went to the temple
many people went more than once and it
was as if the human heart was poured
onto this building with all of our pain
and anguish and yearning and then the
last thing that happened at the end of
this nine days of partying
the temple was burned now the night
before on Saturday night when the man is
burned it’s a great party there are
fireworks and hooting and hollering and
cheering and all of that but the next
night when the temple is burned the
entire community shows up by then there
were probably still 40,000 people left
gathered around the temple in absolute
silence for an hour as this temple was
burned and people’s prayers and longings
of their heart were ascending to heaven
and you could see people holding on to
each other and you could hear people
sobbing quietly and in that moment we
were one human family compassion was
automatic seeing each other through the
eyes of love was instantaneous we didn’t
have to work at it we knew that we were
one human family and we had each other’s
backs it was then that I realized that
that’s where we’re connected as humans
we’re connected in our common and shared
brokenness and our longings to be
connected with one another and as we
experienced that as we experienced those
deep intimate relationships where we can
offer other humans the tender flesh of
our heart and it becomes easier for us
to see those people through the eyes of
love it then becomes easier to see
strangers through the eyes of love and
even perhaps our enemies through the
eyes of love
the world now is too dangerous and too
beautiful for anything but love may your
eyes be so open do you see God in
everyone your ears so you hear the cry
of the poor may your lips be so blessed
you speak nothing but the truth of love
and your hands so that everything you
touch is a sacrament may your feet be so
blessed you run to those who need you
and may your heart be so opened so set
on fire that your love your love changes
everything
[Applause]
[Music]
you
[Music]
[Applause]
the world now is too dangerous and too
beautiful for anything but love when my
daughter was born and I held my first
child in my hands something happened I
felt a love that was so strong I knew it
would never end no matter what she did
I couldn’t stop loving her and believe
me she did a lot but her misdeeds and
her childhood cruel tease never defined
her I could only look at her through the
eyes of love as this sparkling beautiful
human deserving of and capable of love
and I wonder why don’t I look at myself
that way and why don’t we look at other
people that way I know for me it’s the
mistakes that stick I’ll be having a
conversation with a group of people and
I will say ten amazing funny things and
one stupid thing and I will leave that
conversation beating myself up I am so
stupid and then I am no longer Brian
Baker amazing human I am he who says
stupid things and we do that to other
people like that someone cuts us off in
traffic and we don’t think oh I wish
they’d made a different driving choice
we think what an idiot and in an instant
we move them into a category that’s less
than human and we do it with entire
groups of people people that might hold
a view on a social issue that’s
different than ours or people that might
support a different political candidate
and it’s not that we disagree it’s that
we disdain and it’s even worse when we
are with our like-minded friends smugly
congratulating ourselves that were not
like those people you could make the
case that that is the fatal flaw in the
human condition the way that we look at
ourselves and one another not through
the lens of the best we can be
but the worst we have done and then we
magnify that worse thing so it becomes
the only thing I believe that is the
point in the story of Adam and Eve this
creation myth that’s the foundation of
three of our world’s major religions was
written 3,000 years ago to answer one
question what went wrong and in this
story God creates everything that is and
God looks at and goes this is awesome
and then God turns to the first humans
and says enjoy and everything’s gonna be
okay just don’t do one thing don’t eat
the fruit of the tree of the knowledge
of good and evil now think about that
for a moment the author could have
chosen anything as what went wrong it
could be the the knowledge of violence
or murder the knowledge of hatred if
you’re a Puritan the knowledge of
sexuality or the knowledge of religion
all kinds of things right that you could
pick as the thing that went wrong but
this author chose the knowledge of good
and evil meaning don’t take what God
created and called good and don’t take
part of it away and say well that is
evil and not just bad not just
undesirable but evil meaning without any
good in it and if something is evil not
only can we but we should destroy it
that’s the one thing this propensity
that we have to look at ourselves and
others and judge as evil and look at
what happens next in the story Adam and
Eve eat this fruit and the next thing
they do is they look at their own pure
beautiful unclosed form and they go like
this they judge themselves as evil I’m
so ugly I’m so disgusting and they hide
in shame in the bushes God comes through
the garden and every other day they
would run out of the bushes and they
would join hands with God and chat and
have a great little time but this time
they’re hiding in shame disgusted with
themselves in the bushes they say God we
can’t come out we’re naked
God’s heart breaks who told you you were
naked Adam blames Eve Eve blames the
serpent and here we are practically
unable to talk to one another looking at
each other in disgust we’re being ripped
apart by division but it doesn’t have to
be this way this story was written to
show us what’s wrong so that so that we
could change and spiritual traditions
have been teaching for centuries ways of
changing we need to start by paying
attention to our thoughts we don’t even
notice sometimes we do something
embarrassing and this voice kicks in in
our head and says things to us that we
would never say to another human out
loud you’re such an idiot
you’re so stupid and we’re half beaten
to a pulp before we even notice it’s
happening so pay attention notice it and
realize that that voice is not the voice
of God that voice is not telling
truth so let it go and if you can’t let
it go that easily and many of us can’t
then replace that voice with something
else a lyric from a psalm a scripture
the Lord is my shepherd I shall not want
I
I am marvelously and gloriously made I
was having a conversation with a group
of Tibetan Buddhists about this and one
of them said to me you know whenever
that voice kicks in in my head I say a
Hail Mary which I thought was pretty
delightful this Roman Catholic prayer
being said by this Tibetan Buddhist to
cast out the demon of these thoughts so
pay attention to your thoughts and catch
this mean voice and let it go another
thing to try is to assume that everybody
is doing the best they can we are all
paralysed by fear and anxiety and
insecurity and past trauma and the way
we’ve been raised and our prejudices and
biases we have no idea the wounds and
the burdens and the baggage that people
are carrying around I think it’s a
miracle we are as good to one another as
we are given how messed up we are I have
a friend whose granny barb used to say
everybody’s doing the best they can and
sometimes their best is pretty shitty
another spiritual practice and this one
I’m stealing from Jesus is pray for your
enemy
pray for the person you don’t like the
person that scares you pray for the
politician that you think is destroying
the world and I think when Jesus said
pray for your enemy I don’t think he
meant pray that they get hit by a bus
you know or pray that they stumble and
fall or pray that they change to think
just like you I think he meant pray the
prayer their mother would pray that they
live a long life free of suffering and
the causes of suffering now prayer is
not magic this isn’t going to change
their lives but it will change yours if
you pray for your enemy faithfully over
time your heart will change and over
time you will no longer see them just as
this enemy you will see them as a fellow
human being
perhaps tragically and painfully
paralyzed so pray for your enemies now
in all of this it helps to remember how
closely we are connected as humans there
is more that connects us as humans that
separate us now often when we connect we
connect around areas like politics or
religion or nationality or Facebook
algorithms but that’s not how we are
connected as a human family those aren’t
the connections that bridge across all
divisions the way we’re connected as
humans is by our shared brokenness and
our shared longings we all know what
it’s like to be brokenhearted we know
what it’s like to be afraid we know what
it’s like to grieve the loss of a loved
one
we know what it’s like to yearn for love
to be loved to have someone to love and
it’s that’s is the place this place of
the human heart connection our shared
brokenness and our shared longings where
we can come together as a human family
and be one I have experienced that kind
of connection in church and in yoga
studios but the place I experienced it
most significantly most acutely was at
Burning Man Burning Man is a nine-day
event where 70,000 people gather in the
Nevada desert for community of
creativity and free-spirited fun where
whatever your freak is you can get it on
and not be judged and I went to Burning
Man two years ago because my 22 year old
hippie daughter came into two tickets
and she decided to ask her old Episcopal
priest father to go with her and I
expected the partying and the music and
the dancing and the costumes and the
drinking and the nudity what I didn’t
expect was the temple there’s a temple
at Burning Man each year there’s this
beautiful large structure and then
people come from all over the world and
bring mementos they bring ashes or
photographs of loved ones wedding
dresses and they write on the walls all
week long more and more prayers get
added to the walls they write their
hopes and their dreams and their
longings and their anguish and I’d like
to share with you some of the things
that I saw written at my first Burning
Man get better dad r.i.p my mom forgive
I love you still I love you always
there was this one photograph of an
older man in a tuxedo and there was
rioting above it that said daddy I miss
you more than words could ever say you
will always be in my heart I love you
and then underneath in parentheses you
would be proud of me
there was this one black chalkboard
about this big and written in white ink
you you man who raped me
you police who didn’t believe me
you judge who laughed at me and it
went on and on and on this heartbreaking
heart-wrenching searing indictment with
an absolutely no resolution it ended
with you another I only pray each
year the pain gets lighter another I
forgive you men who raped me forgiveness
and a plea for forgiveness was a common
thread forgive me I’m sorry I’m sorry
written again and again in the walls of
the temple my anger for my father ends
now you are my blessing
hug them now prayer after prayer the
temple was the most popular place at
Burning Man everyone went to the temple
many people went more than once and it
was as if the human heart was poured
onto this building with all of our pain
and anguish and yearning and then the
last thing that happened at the end of
this nine days of partying
the temple was burned now the night
before on Saturday night when the man is
burned it’s a great party there are
fireworks and hooting and hollering and
cheering and all of that but the next
night when the temple is burned the
entire community shows up by then there
were probably still 40,000 people left
gathered around the temple in absolute
silence for an hour as this temple was
burned and people’s prayers and longings
of their heart were ascending to heaven
and you could see people holding on to
each other and you could hear people
sobbing quietly and in that moment we
were one human family compassion was
automatic seeing each other through the
eyes of love was instantaneous we didn’t
have to work at it we knew that we were
one human family and we had each other’s
backs it was then that I realized that
that’s where we’re connected as humans
we’re connected in our common and shared
brokenness and our longings to be
connected with one another and as we
experienced that as we experienced those
deep intimate relationships where we can
offer other humans the tender flesh of
our heart and it becomes easier for us
to see those people through the eyes of
love it then becomes easier to see
strangers through the eyes of love and
even perhaps our enemies through the
eyes of love
the world now is too dangerous and too
beautiful for anything but love may your
eyes be so open do you see God in
everyone your ears so you hear the cry
of the poor may your lips be so blessed
you speak nothing but the truth of love
and your hands so that everything you
touch is a sacrament may your feet be so
blessed you run to those who need you
and may your heart be so opened so set
on fire that your love your love changes
everything
[Applause]
[Music]
you
[Music]
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