[Applause]
hi I’m Katherine and for me success was
the only option looking back on it it’s
hardly surprising because I come from a
long line of hard workers go-getters and
overachievers so I suppose it was bred
into me I could see no value in failure
I always gave a hundred percent no
matter what the cost and I simply had to
succeed and it isn’t just my upbringing
or my genes it isn’t just me everyone’s
getting in on the act
Society is polarizing success and
failure as opposites good and bad black
and white we’re supposed to wear our
successes like a badge of honor and
we’re kind of supposed to hide away our
failures or sometimes even pretend they
don’t exist like I sure I didn’t really
want it anyway or the ref made a bad
call or I wasn’t even trying
because it seems failure is no longer an
acceptable part of being human we
weren’t always like that remember when
we’d climb a tree and we didn’t know if
we’d get to the top or when we got 70%
in an exam we think we were brilliant
like we never expected ourselves to be
perfect or to get things right the first
time but somewhere along the way we
learned about being the best and but it
wasn’t okay to make mistakes so we grew
if they afraid of failing and that fears
just got bigger failure is getting more
and more taboo and our version of
success
is so close to perfect sure nobody could
do us so we don’t even try the things we
might fail us and we risk getting
trapped inside our comfort zone sure
we’re gonna save ourselves the roller
coaster that goes along with shooting
for the stars but we’re living a life
that’s just a little bit smaller or when
we do try or we put ourselves under
savage pressure to achieve
we starve ourselves just to reach a
number on the scales or we run injured
rather than drop out of a race or in my
case i sat exams two weeks after an
emergency c-section and while my twins
were in the neonatal wards
thankfully I found a better way of
looking at success and failure and I
found it while I was looking for
something else altogether there I was
juggling work sports and life with one
year-old twins but I was looking for
more it wasn’t just my thirst for
success this time it was adjusting to
life as a parents and finally facing up
to the fact that actually I was an adult
but I was looking for something that
might change me I was looking for an
Everest and then I read that less people
had swum the English Channel than had
climbed Everest and I was intrigued
between the tides and the distance these
legends would swim 26 miles wearing only
swimming togs goggles and a hat I was
hooked now the longest I’d everest form
was about a mile in the pool I hate the
cold and I suffer from terrible motion
sickness but I knew that if I wanted to
change myself I’d have to pick a goal
that I wasn’t sure I could achieve and
the idea of swimming for one country to
another
it made my sole thing the decision was
made I would swim the English Channel
like a typical nerd I read everything I
could find out about it and I talked to
other swimmers there would be no quick
fix it was gonna be tough between work
my boys and my total lack of swimming
experience I reckoned it would take me
about three years to get ready and I
wanted to give it my best shot if this
is the movies right there’d be a
training montage and you’d see me
lifting weights or crying from
exhaustion at the sight of the pool or
rattling with the coals the first time I
swam an hour in
see without a wetsuit I trained really
hard like marathon Half Ironman English
channel relay hurt and I swam all the
time I swam before work after work and
on occasion I even spun through the
night
I swam against the tide and with the
jellyfish what I really really really
wanted to quit I kept swimming let me
tell you about a typical session so it
was a freezing cold January morning and
my dad drove me to the beach
I needed there to be somebody with me in
case I got hypothermia so I stripped
down to my dogs really quickly before I
changed my mind and I weighed out past
the seaweed until I’m deep enough to
start swimming the cold gets into my
sinuses like nothing I’ve ever
experienced it’s like an ice cream
headache that just won’t stop but I keep
swimming I settle myself in and I sing
songs to pass the time about halfway
through I remember about the hypothermia
and I’d convinced myself that my lips
and my toes are numb but at this stage
of the training I realized that I can’t
always trust my mind so I switched
tactics and I count my strokes willing
the repetitions can make and it works
for a while but when my hips start to
cramp up from the calls
I know it’s actually my body so I turn
around and I swim hard until I’m back to
shore and I get dressed before my hands
are too numb dad drives me home while my
teeth shatter and my body shivers to
warm itself up and then I can start my
normal life so I get the boys ready for
play school and I Drive to work you
might think I was cursing myself for
picking such a stupidly heard goal or
questioning my own sanity but I wasn’t I
was concentrating on eating my
sandwiches my third meal of that morning
because I changed I had an open water
swimming body now and it demanded more
more shoulder muscles more fat and
definitely more of food my hair was
puffed up like candy floss
and my eyes were like a panda from the
goggles none of my clothes fit me my
tongue would swell up from the salt
water and more often than not I was
puffy and blue but that wasn’t the point
my body was a machine that worked for me
and machine I was proud of I had changed
I saw what my body could do what all our
bodies can do and it’s incredible the
three years of training passed slowly
and to be honest they almost broke me
but eventually the day of my swim
arrived all that stood between me and
success was 26 miles of swimming my team
were on the boat ready to guide me to
France and I stood on shakespeare’s
beach in Dover and I imagined that all
my family and friends were there with me
I could almost hear them roaring me on
it all came down to this I took a deep
breath and stepped forward the clock
started and my crossing began
I was only delighted with myself I was
doing it I was actually doing it every
step every stroke took me deeper and to
see and further away from the safety of
shore I knew that the cliffs of Dover
would be the most beautiful sight but
today wasn’t a day for looking back
after about two hours I started to feel
seasick but I kept swimming this was the
English Channel after all after about
five hours no matter what food my team
gave me I couldn’t keep anything down
and I was using so much energy just to
move and keep my body warm it was
exhausting the seasickness turned to dry
retching and by 10 hours I was
completely empty it got dark and I felt
something brush against my leg I
remembered just how deep the ocean
actually was and I got really frightened
but I kept swimming
the closer I got to my limits the slower
I became but a cam came over me it was
like those demons that had goaded me to
tears my entire life about quitting and
failing and not being good enough they
were silenced all I could think of was
how lucky I was and how far I’d come I
was no longer obsessed by success so
failure no longer had any power over me
somewhere between 12 and 14 hours
I passed my limits passed anything I
ever thought my mind or body could
endure but I kept swimming my arms were
barely sharing the water and I was
dangerously close to passing out to this
day my husband Dean and I we don’t
remember if either of us actually said
anything but we knew I’d had enough at
14 hours and 45 minutes and only three
miles from France
we called it I got out I had failed
sitting on the boat back to England
every bit of my body was screaming I was
in such pain and I just couldn’t stop
getting sick I was so sorry for myself
and absolutely mortified how could I
have spent three years battling so hard
for this and then fail was I a loser
every fiber of my being streamed no
those thoughts were merely an echo of
somebody that I used to be because I was
full of other emotions I was proud happy
grateful relieved with those emotions
and the pain coursing through my body I
have never felt so alive I finally
realized that failure wasn’t the
opposite of success it was much more
complicated than this
but I never imagined it would feel so
good do I wish I’d reached France of
course but looking back in it now I
wouldn’t change your thing I wanted a
goal that might change me and I like to
have become my boys will grow up knowing
that a mom is someone who works and
trains and fails and keeps going anyway
my boys will grow up knowing that
success isn’t the only option it turns
out not so meaningless channel has made
me a better everything it turns out that
failure is a brilliant teacher and it’s
taught me that the only thing worth
fearing is failing to begin never
risking anything never trying never
growing letting anything or anyone stop
us from being the best that we can be
not perfect or even successful but our
best because that’s more than enough
so let’s ditch this idea of perfect
let’s do away with the idea that failure
is the opposite of success and seek out
those brilliant goals that make our sole
thing the ones that terrify us that we
just can’t rationalize to anybody else
and we’ll give it our best shot
we won’t leave any bit of ourselves back
and we’ll leave the safety of Shore
vulnerable exposed uncertain because it
really is ok to fail it’s not success
that matters it’s the daring to begin
that gives us courage and hope hope that
life can be different that we can be
different that we can push past their
limits and achieve more than we ever
dreamed possible and when we do that
ladies and gentlemen I’m certain we’re
in for an incredible life-changing
adventure thank you
[Music]
[Applause]
hi I’m Katherine and for me success was
the only option looking back on it it’s
hardly surprising because I come from a
long line of hard workers go-getters and
overachievers so I suppose it was bred
into me I could see no value in failure
I always gave a hundred percent no
matter what the cost and I simply had to
succeed and it isn’t just my upbringing
or my genes it isn’t just me everyone’s
getting in on the act
Society is polarizing success and
failure as opposites good and bad black
and white we’re supposed to wear our
successes like a badge of honor and
we’re kind of supposed to hide away our
failures or sometimes even pretend they
don’t exist like I sure I didn’t really
want it anyway or the ref made a bad
call or I wasn’t even trying
because it seems failure is no longer an
acceptable part of being human we
weren’t always like that remember when
we’d climb a tree and we didn’t know if
we’d get to the top or when we got 70%
in an exam we think we were brilliant
like we never expected ourselves to be
perfect or to get things right the first
time but somewhere along the way we
learned about being the best and but it
wasn’t okay to make mistakes so we grew
if they afraid of failing and that fears
just got bigger failure is getting more
and more taboo and our version of
success
is so close to perfect sure nobody could
do us so we don’t even try the things we
might fail us and we risk getting
trapped inside our comfort zone sure
we’re gonna save ourselves the roller
coaster that goes along with shooting
for the stars but we’re living a life
that’s just a little bit smaller or when
we do try or we put ourselves under
savage pressure to achieve
we starve ourselves just to reach a
number on the scales or we run injured
rather than drop out of a race or in my
case i sat exams two weeks after an
emergency c-section and while my twins
were in the neonatal wards
thankfully I found a better way of
looking at success and failure and I
found it while I was looking for
something else altogether there I was
juggling work sports and life with one
year-old twins but I was looking for
more it wasn’t just my thirst for
success this time it was adjusting to
life as a parents and finally facing up
to the fact that actually I was an adult
but I was looking for something that
might change me I was looking for an
Everest and then I read that less people
had swum the English Channel than had
climbed Everest and I was intrigued
between the tides and the distance these
legends would swim 26 miles wearing only
swimming togs goggles and a hat I was
hooked now the longest I’d everest form
was about a mile in the pool I hate the
cold and I suffer from terrible motion
sickness but I knew that if I wanted to
change myself I’d have to pick a goal
that I wasn’t sure I could achieve and
the idea of swimming for one country to
another
it made my sole thing the decision was
made I would swim the English Channel
like a typical nerd I read everything I
could find out about it and I talked to
other swimmers there would be no quick
fix it was gonna be tough between work
my boys and my total lack of swimming
experience I reckoned it would take me
about three years to get ready and I
wanted to give it my best shot if this
is the movies right there’d be a
training montage and you’d see me
lifting weights or crying from
exhaustion at the sight of the pool or
rattling with the coals the first time I
swam an hour in
see without a wetsuit I trained really
hard like marathon Half Ironman English
channel relay hurt and I swam all the
time I swam before work after work and
on occasion I even spun through the
night
I swam against the tide and with the
jellyfish what I really really really
wanted to quit I kept swimming let me
tell you about a typical session so it
was a freezing cold January morning and
my dad drove me to the beach
I needed there to be somebody with me in
case I got hypothermia so I stripped
down to my dogs really quickly before I
changed my mind and I weighed out past
the seaweed until I’m deep enough to
start swimming the cold gets into my
sinuses like nothing I’ve ever
experienced it’s like an ice cream
headache that just won’t stop but I keep
swimming I settle myself in and I sing
songs to pass the time about halfway
through I remember about the hypothermia
and I’d convinced myself that my lips
and my toes are numb but at this stage
of the training I realized that I can’t
always trust my mind so I switched
tactics and I count my strokes willing
the repetitions can make and it works
for a while but when my hips start to
cramp up from the calls
I know it’s actually my body so I turn
around and I swim hard until I’m back to
shore and I get dressed before my hands
are too numb dad drives me home while my
teeth shatter and my body shivers to
warm itself up and then I can start my
normal life so I get the boys ready for
play school and I Drive to work you
might think I was cursing myself for
picking such a stupidly heard goal or
questioning my own sanity but I wasn’t I
was concentrating on eating my
sandwiches my third meal of that morning
because I changed I had an open water
swimming body now and it demanded more
more shoulder muscles more fat and
definitely more of food my hair was
puffed up like candy floss
and my eyes were like a panda from the
goggles none of my clothes fit me my
tongue would swell up from the salt
water and more often than not I was
puffy and blue but that wasn’t the point
my body was a machine that worked for me
and machine I was proud of I had changed
I saw what my body could do what all our
bodies can do and it’s incredible the
three years of training passed slowly
and to be honest they almost broke me
but eventually the day of my swim
arrived all that stood between me and
success was 26 miles of swimming my team
were on the boat ready to guide me to
France and I stood on shakespeare’s
beach in Dover and I imagined that all
my family and friends were there with me
I could almost hear them roaring me on
it all came down to this I took a deep
breath and stepped forward the clock
started and my crossing began
I was only delighted with myself I was
doing it I was actually doing it every
step every stroke took me deeper and to
see and further away from the safety of
shore I knew that the cliffs of Dover
would be the most beautiful sight but
today wasn’t a day for looking back
after about two hours I started to feel
seasick but I kept swimming this was the
English Channel after all after about
five hours no matter what food my team
gave me I couldn’t keep anything down
and I was using so much energy just to
move and keep my body warm it was
exhausting the seasickness turned to dry
retching and by 10 hours I was
completely empty it got dark and I felt
something brush against my leg I
remembered just how deep the ocean
actually was and I got really frightened
but I kept swimming
the closer I got to my limits the slower
I became but a cam came over me it was
like those demons that had goaded me to
tears my entire life about quitting and
failing and not being good enough they
were silenced all I could think of was
how lucky I was and how far I’d come I
was no longer obsessed by success so
failure no longer had any power over me
somewhere between 12 and 14 hours
I passed my limits passed anything I
ever thought my mind or body could
endure but I kept swimming my arms were
barely sharing the water and I was
dangerously close to passing out to this
day my husband Dean and I we don’t
remember if either of us actually said
anything but we knew I’d had enough at
14 hours and 45 minutes and only three
miles from France
we called it I got out I had failed
sitting on the boat back to England
every bit of my body was screaming I was
in such pain and I just couldn’t stop
getting sick I was so sorry for myself
and absolutely mortified how could I
have spent three years battling so hard
for this and then fail was I a loser
every fiber of my being streamed no
those thoughts were merely an echo of
somebody that I used to be because I was
full of other emotions I was proud happy
grateful relieved with those emotions
and the pain coursing through my body I
have never felt so alive I finally
realized that failure wasn’t the
opposite of success it was much more
complicated than this
but I never imagined it would feel so
good do I wish I’d reached France of
course but looking back in it now I
wouldn’t change your thing I wanted a
goal that might change me and I like to
have become my boys will grow up knowing
that a mom is someone who works and
trains and fails and keeps going anyway
my boys will grow up knowing that
success isn’t the only option it turns
out not so meaningless channel has made
me a better everything it turns out that
failure is a brilliant teacher and it’s
taught me that the only thing worth
fearing is failing to begin never
risking anything never trying never
growing letting anything or anyone stop
us from being the best that we can be
not perfect or even successful but our
best because that’s more than enough
so let’s ditch this idea of perfect
let’s do away with the idea that failure
is the opposite of success and seek out
those brilliant goals that make our sole
thing the ones that terrify us that we
just can’t rationalize to anybody else
and we’ll give it our best shot
we won’t leave any bit of ourselves back
and we’ll leave the safety of Shore
vulnerable exposed uncertain because it
really is ok to fail it’s not success
that matters it’s the daring to begin
that gives us courage and hope hope that
life can be different that we can be
different that we can push past their
limits and achieve more than we ever
dreamed possible and when we do that
ladies and gentlemen I’m certain we’re
in for an incredible life-changing
adventure thank you
[Music]
[Applause]
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