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Top 10 Worst Disguises in Movies


okay let’s move out you’d have to be
pretty dense to be fooled by these
get-ups welcome to watchmojo.com and
today we’re counting down our picks for
the top 10 worst disguises in movies
hello for this list we’re taking a look
at the most unconvincing and flat-out
terrible movie disguises whether they’re
purposely bad or unintentionally bad
number 10 all woman Arnold junior
regnant what’s more preposterous than
Arnold Schwarzenegger as a pregnant man
how about Arnold Schwarzenegger as a
pregnant man posing as a pregnant woman
in this ivan reitman comedy arnie
inexplicably gets knocked up and attends
a retreat for expecting mama’s I
realized that my appearance may be a bit
startling his facade comes complete with
a blonde wig pearls and a pink dress to
make this ridiculous disguise appear
slightly more believable
Arnold shocks his masculinity up to
anabolic steroid usage when I was a
sports woman on is German Olympic track
and field team they dispensed anabolic
steroids as freely as here in America to
dole out Gatorade underneath his girly
getup though all we can see is the
Terminator but I’m all woman
believe you me number nine the many
faces of Simon Templar the saint
listen if I give this to you you’re
gonna give it to your daddy and what’s
he gonna give you not even a Christmas
bonus Simon Templar is a man of numerous
false identities and none of them is
even remotely believable
seriously this guy’s supposed to be a
master of disguise Thanks oh yeah he’s
more like a lesser Saturday Night Live
cast member putting on countless phony
accents and even funnier wigs but his
most far-fetched costume has got to be
as a geek who attends a lecture on cold
fusion and put any stock in this cold
human mumbo jumbo do you actually I do
really sporting thick glasses atrocious
teeth and the world’s worst comb-over it
looks like Val Kilmer rated Jerry
Lewis’s Nutty Professor wardrobe oh yes
as a matter of fact now that you ran up
the additive was uh specifically a three
parts carbon five parts I’ve to one part
nitrogen and three parts oxygen the
nerdy voice doesn’t exactly add to the
illusion number eight
trench coat turtle Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles
ninjas need to be stealthy so that they
can blend into their environment with
ease
who died and made you referee you did
your job now get out of here let me do
mine is JB lowlifes need to be taught a
lesson
not like that data that’s easier said
than done when you’re a big ass turtle
according to the logic of Teenage Mutant
Ninja Turtles however you can fool just
about anybody with a simple trench coat
when did it go up with this stuff even
if you have green skin a mounting shell
and three fingers dressing like a film
noir detective is sure to hide all about
a five-minute game misconduct for
roughing pal really though how is it
that the only person who catches on to
this disguise is a cab driver with that
quiz that look likes of a big title
number seven mini legs Austin Powers in
Goldmember will need a disguise
as Austin Powers and mini-me penetrate
dr. Evil’s submarine lair they run into
a dilemma when only one uniform is
available there’s only one uniform one
of us has to go on the other one
shoulders
so naturally Austin gets on his little
partner’s shoulders um there’s something
not quite right with this picture
nevertheless the two managed to fool
everyone including a doctor did you
really think you could get away with
this I did actually yes every new
recruit must have a physical now get in
here sailor you know a seven plus years
of higher learning knows what your
insides do doctor doctor this leads to
numerous comedic hijinks as they endure
a physical when asked to step behind a
curtain however the truth eventually
comes out with hysterical results
number six Japanese James Bond You Only
Live Twice request permission to come
aboard sir
permission granted the 1960s were a
different time worth they it wasn’t
uncommon to see white actors portraying
characters of Asian descent which is
essentially the definition of
politically incorrect today one of the
most uncomfortable instances of yellow
face has got to be in You Only Live
Twice the girl I have chosen is an agent
of mine but first you must become
Japanese to go undercover
double-oh-seven get some plastic surgery
done to appear Japanese apparently the
Secret Service hired a hairdresser
instead of a plastic surgeon cuz James
clearly just got his bangs cut and glued
on some bushy eyebrows Mr Bond probably
should have stayed dead for this
adventure its lucky we’re getting out of
here is tomorrow you would be a blow
Japanese vodka with humble Japanese wife
at your side
yeah with a face like a pig number five
belly dancer
wild wild west these breasts are a work
of art aesthetically and scientifically
perfectly they look like shit just when
you thought that wild wild west couldn’t
get any sillier or more condescending it
officially jumped the shark by putting
Will Smith in drag to save president
ulysses s grant Smith’s Jim West resorts
to dressing as an exotic belly dancer oh
girl
although anybody could tell it’s a man
hiding behind the mask the villainous
dr. loveless of course falls for this
ruse he Bonilla why are you so cruel to
me
West entices the body with the alluring
outfit but things get a little too
heated when parts of his costume turned
into flamethrowers
number four Josephine and Daphne some
like it hot
hello mr. Polyakov I understand you’re
looking for a couple of girl musicians
while cross-dressing humour doesn’t
always work some like it hot stands out
as one of the funniest movies ever made
what happened I’m engaged
congratulations
who’s the lucky girl I the film success
can be greatly attributed to the comedic
performances of Tony Curtis and Jack
Lemmon as a couple of musicians that
disguise themselves as women you gotta
be under 25 we can pass but I gotta be
blond
we could dye our hair and you gotta be
girls we could no we couldn’t
with that said their disguises are
anything but convincing it’s no use
we’re not gonna get away with a joke the
fact that they both have bulging Adam’s
apples should have been the first
indication that these women were more
than meets the eye
all right girls I take it from the top
and put a little heat under it yet
everybody is bamboozled by they’re
flashy dresses and high-pitched voices
well nobody’s perfect I’m a man well
nobody’s perfect
number three hock med team America world
police
yeah
nobody goes into a film from Matt Stone
and Trey Parker expecting racial
sensitivity especially when it comes to
the Middle East to infiltrate a group of
terrorists Geary undergoes extensive
surgery to appear Middle Eastern we need
you to act like a Middle Eastern
terrorist right away there’s just one
problem I don’t look Middle Eastern
leave that to us
all they really do is smear some crap
and pubic hair onto his face though
amazing the Val Morra fication
completely worked sit up and take a look
Gary they don’t even have Gary wear the
proper attire wrapping a towel around
his head in place of a turban is more
than enough you’re going to fool
everyone Gary or should I say hot men
even if Gary’s uncanny disguise can’t
fool the guards his unmatched acting
abilities will result in a friendly
durka durka come on Gary
act you have the power buck Derk Derk
allah Derka Derka Muhammad jihad number
two the white chicks white chicks you
know them girls ain’t gonna be there oh
they’ll be there on paper the idea of
the Wayans brothers playing two FBI
agents posing as Caucasian Eris’s may
sound like a funny premise white chicks
pretty much drops dead however once they
actually dawn their ungodly disguises
Exhibit A those hideous latex masks they
look more like something out of a horror
picture than a buddy cop comedy
despite their cringe-worthy appearances
the two managed to deceive everybody in
the Hamptons including the best friends
of the bimbos they’re pretending to be
them away
walking fast hisses has a mo man
there’s suspension of disbelief and then
there is just being stupid guess which
this one is look around Nicole
there’s nothing intelligent about this
before we get to our top pick here are
some honorable or in this case
dishonorable mentions they’re fabulous
Oh
I’m a pretty shader pack for God’s sake
telling Who I am
Kemal and Olaf double-crossed you I saw
them take the jewelry off the train is
that convention so do ya please have a
seat
yes we’re going to have a seat now sit
down
oh sorry come on give your big momma
great big oh oh it’s so good to see you
big momma I thought you may have
forgotten all about me oh gosh your
mouth sure number one turtle the master
of disguise I’m going to be a master of
disguise I’m going to be a master these
guys I’m doing your mother and father
are in grave danger at his best Dana
Carvey can be a hilarious comedian with
a gift from mimicking at his worst we
get this alleged comedy this is what you
are doing this is what I want you to do
as the title suggests Carvey plays a
master of disguise who actually does
nothing but call attention to himself
with extravagant costumes yeah I don’t
mean to keep harping but the name of
turtle club no it’s just a name I think
you’re taking a little bit too literally
of all his insufferable personalities
the most infamous has got to be the
turtle guy
am I not early enough for the turtle
club with a bald cap googly glasses and
an oversized body this obnoxious
creation should have stayed in his shell
or at the very least thrown on a
trenchcoat to blend in better
oh he’s fine I’m fine too do you agree
with our list what’s your problem with
me yeah you want to go guys guys guys
what movie disguises failed to fool you
never never put it in the mouth that’s a
tease you might as well go out and buy
TransAm for more entertaining top 10s
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