morning everyone
customers could ever understand up from
the police staff so also just introduced
I’m a rugby player and I believe before
any event that you do or any sporting
event that you should get warmed up
physically emotionally spiritually so
I’m going to do is we’re going to start
buying a quick stretch so if it gets
runs in the air and altima do is going
to reach down at this side first
well order on then that side will try
touches tours and then be careful with
this one we’re going to go backwards be
careful there we are so stretch now I
want to get as mortgage some energy rule
to various phases that where if you’re
not near someone getting near someone so
these two on the second row to go next
to him just start massaging the person
in front of you please and I want you
just to tell them tell them if you want
start judo chopping judo chopping get
into em getting warmed up perfect now
turn around repay the favor nice
keep going remember harder harder or
softer let me know but I’m not let’s get
real warm here judo chop in judo
chopping face me so connect some energy
just to finish sure we’ve stretched
we’ve got physically ready which kind of
where we’re going to really build this
energy so when the noise gets to appear
so I’m going to just me and Emmas with
Runza we all only I was answer so when
the noise gets enough in a room our
clapper we’ll sit down and we’ll we’ll
start with this journey sides when you
make as much noise as physical possible
let everything out and let’s get rid of
this too this journey for the whole day
perfect thank you so I finish some
energy in the room which is great for
the rest of the speakers there’s nothing
worse than going to a room with no
energy so I’m going to take you on a
little bit of a journey really and the
you know it might seem quite gimmicky
when you do something like that but it
really is important to get yourself
emotionally and wash and already saw and
we’ll take you back so no we don’t have
masses of time so I’m going to try keep
my personal started quite quite brief
and straight to the point Muller when I
was 8 years old my parents broke up and
I don’t even our parents are broke up or
they’ve been part of a breakup herself
who come quite a difficult time and I
was 8 years old my parents broke up and
for some reason we decided to live with
my dad which going back 19 years was was
sort of unheard of two young boys living
just with the dad and why I started to
do was because the emotional stress I
guess was a start to comfort and I got
really big really big on a lot of where
when mother my age or eight years older
were 10 stone and I just kept comfy in
and comfy at the same time I started
going to school and I’ll talk a little
bit about masks that we all wear masks
whether you CEO of a business where they
have imprisoned a lot now and prisoners
the vulgar of a mask rugby player got a
mask because your job is to run into
someone as hard as you can you got act
off and whatever we’re doing with all
constant wearing this mask so i hid what
we’re going on arm needs to go on is
this really cheeky lad that always
making jokes and you know we’re really
happy underneath our in turmoil absolute
turmoil and I started getting bullied
really bad physically and verbally and
in real difficult time in my life and I
guess I said that you know things come
in threes I remember it just like it
were yesterday it were Friday afternoon
my friend will come around my mom’s
outside when moms out used to go on a
weekend I believe a weekend they were
first-time thermometers moved into a new
house and I bring my friend round for
tea and teacher come up to me says I’ll
real excited a real exciting friend
Kelsey she will come around I’m going to
get too young I was like big tea party
and teachers says I’m really sorry
or you’re going to Kelsey instead
because so what’s happened happened to
your mom she’s been a bit of an accident
and that’s all I told myself I’ve gone
it turned out that my mum as she’ll come
to school to pick me up
I carried her spooning over crystal
again and left to a slight brain damage
so eight years old dealing with my
parents break up then the the bullying
and then fir’d the my mom’s car crash
what Angela partner was with my mom
it led to a variety of mineral
conditions which is why I’m real passion
about men I love you know I call it a
20-year journal meant a lot because
that’s why he’s been my mum developed
severe depression anxiety amongst Irish
in phenomena they were Irish in the room
I sure got a lot of good spirit their
passion of a move on her part upon table
dancing and and all that was just
completely ripped however because she
started developing what they believed at
a time to be epilepsy so they fed her
the highest form of medication on the
planet for this epilepsy for ten years
and she was kept blacking out blacking
out and one time again jugo where else
and she has this blackout and what
happened is might where she live when
your school so she’d put T lon
she’s going to front room with T and
then she blacked out and I’ll start
burning down around her again like the
car crash she were very fortunate
someone had come smashed window just
like the car crash exactly there as if
you believe in God or Allah or whatever
religion or spirituality believing as if
a guardian angel come smash window and
got my mom out of this house or further
develop with my mom with this condition
call need non epileptic attack disorder
which means my mom just drops falls
about anyone so she’ll fall she’ll a tea
full knockety faux brick a cheek bone
breakage are no signs no signals nothing
she just dropped some falls so when you
you know getting over a little bit later
in life you want really friends right
here I was fifteen year old II know your
mom’s out and she’s got her broken nose
into black Isis you know it’s quite a
tough image against but what were real
difficult is that she got passed from
pillar to post so I started looking a
lot around mental often and really why
turned out with my mom’s mind is
her conscious mind and her subconscious
mind in work to give us all those now
you’ll all listen and you’ll take 10% of
this in and then you go home and think
about my mom’s subconscious mind can’t
do that so she gets a little bit
stressed I remember some old computers
at school when you overload it and just
shuts down that’s basically what my
mom’s mindless or I started learning
about this from a very very young agent
self-taught myself and then what my dad
did for me to get me through my
struggles I got me to play in rugby so I
think I believe that everyone should
have a corporate mechanism in life and
whether that be drawing running jointed
gym playing rugby which is quite
barbaric I guess you really know someone
it’s not really that good for you but it
makes people feel good so it were a real
escape for me you know I were a scare
pace to go and hear a place where I felt
significant Hill Place rococo connected
people because at school I went on as I
Slav cheong fatt a union that will meet
school rugby over the big guy to give me
a bad scar so I felt a significant in
that environment and obviously I went on
to you know I got quite quick from a
real big career but I went on to play
professionally and I remember getting
bought by the lead rhinos and you know
we down south some B’s man even know the
sport of rugby league so lead runners at
the time was the the champions the world
champions and they bought me from
Salford so this kid from off ndon where
I’m from you know a council stair to go
and play in fairly dry nose in
travelling world and playing and
training with these you know some of the
world’s best players was it was just
unbelievable for me the following year
after my first 10 games in first team I
took the risk to go on lon
I went out of London spent a year in
London when I came back and for some
times in life for whatever reason your
face don’t fit just time in UK timing
wrong and and not open to me when I’m
about to lead and whatever reason
they’ve got new coach and we just him
we’re just even in see eye to eye are I
just didn’t fit in his plans and he let
me go so I am going to my local team
Halifax which is still some professional
and it’s a dream I always had to play
for my local team
but when the partner wasn’t into that
year I felt I failed this time I thought
I’d failed so I started doing what I did
with our younger start comfy and again
point a lot of where a ballooned broke
up my partner pushed her away and and
guys in the room when you break up a
girl the natural reaction is to say
let’s go out let’s drink this go find
more girls and and what happened then is
that it started to get to a point where
I didn’t think I could talk to my
friends about cuz it was the same answer
and that feeling out it although what to
say my friends or has missed this girl
you know I feel long I’ve realized to
learn I couldn’t tell them that because
they’re we’re dealing with it their
works are conditioned to do is let’s go
out and one night I’ve gone out and when
you’re at Leeds you go like watch out
your Walker eat are you and dark a bit
of a magnifying glass and that’s what it
was you behavior and everything would
spawn and I’d come away from that and I
found myself on this altercation on a
knife I myself in a police cell and I
remember thinking that Mormon this was a
single worst point of my life all that
stuff it up and I built myself up and
got away from a certain type of
environment to this this professional
environment and here I was in in this
police cell and that were as I said the
single worst moment at that time and
this is where I come to why me what’s
next because what I realized is that
everything that bad that ever happened
in my life from small to big host asked
myself why me and always or done this
car I’m a failed an example why me
you’ve missed a boss as simple as
missing a bus to get somewhere on your
trains layer and it still is it sounded
or some people are laughing because
that’s it and you’re why me why me have
sick of this and then I realize that
every time I ask himself why me this he
just got tighter and tighter and tighter
and tighter and you saw slowly crushing
me and it was when I was sat in his
police cell that this question just come
to mount and I said what’s next I got
two options here he keep going why me
you find yourself down a road that you
don’t want to be are you go what’s next
and you get yourself in her place where
where’s right so the short version this
is that I went on and got myself in a
bar gym and went in toddler as we said
entrepreneur Moyes trial do new things
and bought this gym and I got myself in
complete physical condition got back my
partner would bought an out and cars and
all this stuff would consider success
had I’d kind of done that with nice
houses with nice cars and and all that
things that I said would consider
success
my missus is six months pregnant if I
was got asthma in the room and on
Gastman in the room so you had heard
what I would like at schools our big
kids or cross country I don’t if you do
a cross could you across country in
Bristol we have to go out and feel he’s
a run basically hi it across countries
you could imagine yeah we would start in
period one and develop a clapping
meeting period five honestly I would run
start at nine o’clock had teachers used
to always make an example of me because
Luke never stops he might be slow but it
never stops as pop him in so I used to
always look at the kid to our last
memory I didn’t have to do it I was used
to wish I had asthma has to go around
school track finding a nele but
obviously didn’t work so missus rings me
one day she six motor rings and she says
I’ve got a mum where hospital my
inhalers not working the give me a
nebulizer it’s not working so when I go
to hospital so she oh she goes hospital
and I’ll give you the short version of
story bracelets gets tossed building
four years of being with my partner that
time I’d never seen her cry even when we
broke up here honest all right
I just often she missed me but so she
got tossed bill and she’s in medical
assessment wild in the chick around I’ve
gone down to shop and I’ve come back
home I’ve been told every eyes have come
back upstairs she’s crying she’s all in
a children frog she she’s she can’t
breathe dr. Shapiro’s miracle I describe
it as like a film’s doctor shopper
husband wound of a room and they just
best it tells me that I kept saying I
was a baby I was a baby I was a bear but
just told him you missus his critical
right now lease is critical and off he
goes
so I’ve got Ringley says mom till he
says mom and I tell I tell her about a
doll anyway she comes on after after two
days of intensive care unit seven
doctors so I route she were fine but the
the feeling of what of what went on
there were just I know they were
experienced before you know the fact
that could have lost my old world there
in that one moment so everyone like
shepherd’s pie so I fought vinaigrette
boyfriend we’re going to make a
shepherd’s pie so I go on up and
cupboard glass ball falls out me
millimeter from chopping meat oa7
attending a meter and I’m thinking why
me what’s next why me
what’s notes and then it came straight
to me what’s next so I go on and gone
this was next moment I go on and have
the best season ever odd again all these
all these stuff the single worst thing
happened in my life then and rushing
because I know my mate he’s got these
cards telling me all real so I’m
basically what happened is my uh my
brother in law or per mouth sat in the
third of April and we’re having a laugh
from the jerk Sunday morning he goes and
plays football with his friends Sunday
afternoon goes to pledging with his
two-year-old daughter my two-year-old
daughter I’m a missus his sister Sunday
night plays cousin has his and off on
snapchat his miss and he’s all about
come to my house on the Wednesday
talking about buying a house now still
type of stuff
Monday morning goes and buys a rope and
text his life found dead Tuesday morning
no sign no signal no warning no nothing
and that led me to this four days after
that finding that so it would tell her
that my happened is because that Randy’s
family and this was sort of me I thought
I had to sweep up the pieces in a sense
so I would want to run his best friend
told his the mother of his child Ranma
Ranma missus told his best friend had to
tell everyone got four days after that
why me what’s next started going through
my head and the what’s next moment for
me was finding a career in a space where
men could go and talk because he’s
obviously at a booth topic on why men
will go and talk
so the what next came in first people
like the physically handing back so
there’s no physical you know you can’t
bring him back so it is why me it’s all
why me how can you ever watch now then I
realized that what’s next what you’re
relating what’s next is to what can you
do next
you can change what’s Connors you can
change what’s going to be so what I did
is I went along start this group first
session nine men turned up then fifteen
men turned up then I started a campaign
some his Marcia we were take a selfie
like this within four week over hundred
million people had done it and I believe
that he so care talk that’s what it is
it’s okay talking about a period because
this one just a split-second decision
this is a lifetime I’m in love you know
this started when our eight years old
the father I probably very lucky that I
learned to talk at eight years old the
resilience my dad had put in me Alan
talk a years old so came up with a
selfie idea I’m a revenue job I may say
since you’re better they say to me
Cathy cat co-working cats eat work I
says no I’ve got feeling it will I just
as simple it’s inclusive would be six
year old or 60 year old everyone can do
it and anyway I took the selfie put lots
of filters on it because not all I could
and fours but I did on this one
but although I’ve seen a fault lights
are look quite good under actually so I
took the fall I did it by the morning no
one had done it and I’m Vicki she’s worn
but believing it you know so I kept
hammering it away our messaging people
please put one on please put on please
point please put one on by that now
people start to do it by Friday Ricky
Gervais donate a lot by blood on it and
then as I said four-wheeler hundred
million people doing it I had this
belief that what we had and I’m going to
be believer in why y’all why every
another why I believe that was punished
planet for something and I believe
that’s all this stuff it happened man
you can blame people for what’s up and
die you can blame them for the good days
created so what I believed is that my
what’s next now is to carry on rolling
this movement out so this movement
continues to grow we’ve now got eight
clubs across the country from hole to
lay all the way down South Wales Halifax
when these clubs are going to keep on
growing and one thing I’ve realized is
that thoughts equal feelings so if you
come here really quick pick you up you
want some you look really happy so it’s
just this is just a really simple and
it’s just some I’ve learned along the
way so if I start poking chest how do
you feel big grumper well you don’t
realize any of that I’d probably lead to
anger eventually but I don’t know it’s
because I’ve got him up the aisle being
around applies actual eft him a thousand
pound outside how do you feel now far
better by but now as he sits but Danny
were really upset with young girls and
potty humor and a person so your
thoughts equal your feelings every
feeling that you think you’ve got really
it’s just come from afar so you change
if you look you link the fight or you
link the action to a different fart and
the feeling feels a lot different so
what’s the message I’ve got for every
idea is I guess there’s two main
messages the fact that it really is okay
at all where were you man female a young
person a no ap doesn’t matter it really
is all care talking that by getting
these faults out there you cannot all
here emotions and the next one is I
guess no matter what happens in life we
talk about perseverance and what
perseverance is it’s that no matter what
you’ll come across and this is my fear
of perseverance no matter what battle
you come across
your life of a big or small you think is
you know that’s our problem to you
whether you miss a bus out there and you
think that’s real about however you lose
a loved one life is in perspective to
you right then and you’ve got a question
that are coming to you right now it’s
why me do it to a sit in this moment and
and I guess soul can carry on getting
more negativity drawn to me I don’t go
what sneck stand what can I personally
do next to make this situation as
positive as possible so I do thank you all for listening and it’s okay talk