3,900 stairs I was looking up at 3900
stairs 3900 steep and slippery stairs
cut into the mountain Rock 3900 stairs
that I had to climb one morning last
November I began the most challenging
day of my life in the middle of the
Himalayan mountains in central Nepal
looking up at those stairs for a little
height perspective the CN tower has
seventeen hundred and seventy-six stairs
so my task that day was like climbing
the stairs of the CN tower a little more
than twice if the CN tower stairs were
made of stone and covered in mud I was
on day four a debilitating head cold and
I was trekking at an altitude I had
never known before I wanted to quit
before I had even begun after the first
1,000 stairs my legs felt like jello and
I had to will them to take every step
upwards after 2,000 stairs my lungs felt
as though they might explode and after
3,000 stairs
finally my resolve collapsed I unstrap
my backpack I threw it on the ground and
I had an enormous cry at the edge of the
mountain but then with some encouraging
words from my family and the blissful
endorphins that occur after tears I
found a reserve of strength but I didn’t
know I had I picked up my backpack and I
strapped it back on and I began
ascending and I made it to the top of
those stairs and the mountain absolute
glory hard situations and in this
instance hard travel make us stronger
last year my husband John and I and our
three kids Angus
Duncan and Clementine left our secure
Canadian homes for the adventure and
challenge of backpacking around the
world nine months 19 countries five
continents sixty-nine thousand
kilometers it was the boldest and
scariest and most wonderful thing we
have ever done and the most
transformational people often ask us
about the genesis of this idea what was
it on our bucket list was it because we
had traveled in our youth was it simple
wanderlust well the answer is yes we had
many motivations for travel in this
manner and not the least of which was
the concept of bottling entitlements
entitlement is a hot topic these days
isn’t it how we’re raising a soft
spoiled generation coddled by schools
and society and helicopter parents lives
that are over controlled and over
protected and we were met with some
opposition some people thought we were
crazy why would you remove your children
from their easy and cushy and
predictable lives but we are contrarians
and by choosing difficult travel we gave
our family the opportunity to foster the
life skills that otherwise may have been
missed or minimized in our daily lives
the opportunity to build the grits
required to manage the massive changes
we had a few guiding principles for our
adventure we focused our time on
off-the-beaten-path destinations place
is uncommon for family travelers places
such as the countryside of Vietnam war
torn Bosnia and the deserts of Peru we
had a small daily budget for our travels
specifically 200 Canadian dollars each
day for five people’s food
accommodations and most travel and most
important of all we lived like the
locals as thoroughly as possible
everywhere we went we stayed in family
homes and hostels and huts we slept
under the stars and we slept under
mosquito nets and often we all slept in
one room we used local transportation
derelict buses and ferries and tuk tuks
and night trains and we ate local
cuisine barbecued crickets chicken’s
feet cow’s heart and steaming cups of
water buffalo milk
we traveled hard this was not a vacation
this was not a holiday this was an
adventure we were in search of authentic
and challenging experiences with the
goal of seeing how people really live
around the world so what makes up this
grit well there are five characteristics
that I observed change to myself and our
family over our journey sacrifice
adaptability patience empathy and
tenacity firstly on sacrifice traveling
minimally taught us to do without for
most of my adult life when preparing for
a typical vacation I would pack it all
shoes for every outfit accessories for
every occasion but this journey was
different on this journey we each had
only one small 7 kilo backpack for all
of our gear I can see some looks of
horror
it was almost unimaginable surviving
with so little socks proved an
interesting challenge as we each had
only three pair so we learned
to wear a pair have a pair in reserve
and have one pair washed and drying
traveling this minimally was a powerful
learning experience and we realized that
often in life the vast majority of our
possessions just unnecessarily weigh us
down the second attribute of mental grit
adaptability sleeping in a new bed or
even with a new pillow can often prove
disruptive well last year we slept in 92
different beds and if one is to believe
the personal growth comes not from
comfort but from discomfort then on our
first night in Greece we all grew
tremendously we had booked an early
morning arrival at the Athens Airport
and much to our surprise our flight
actually landed several hours early and
we were without accommodations until the
next day so lacking a viable plan and
with three exhausted kids in two more
exhausted adults we decided to sleep at
the airport the air conditioning was on
full the fluorescent lights were harsh
and the music hummed just loud enough to
be jarring we had only our backpacks for
pillows and our quick dry towels for
blankets as we talked our kids into
sleep that night on a damp concrete
floor
John and I were filled with doubt and
guilt but we all made it through that
uncomfortable night no worse for wear
and we actually felt a pretty great
sense of accomplishment adaptability has
preserved us as a species and it
preserved us as an exhausted family at
the Athens Airport the third attribute
of mental grit patience we thought it
would be interesting to take an
old-fashioned local train from Malaysia
into Thailand the trip was quite
inexpensive and web reviews suggested it
would be a little rustic but pretty
straightforward
a few hours into our journey we were
rolling along the countryside listening
to the clatter clatter of the tracks
when suddenly Wham we had hit something
something big we had hit a cow hours
later we were back on the tracks again
rolling along now in the darkness it’s a
little hard to believe but there was
another Wham another cow but this time a
more serious derailment ours at the side
of the tracks with no information as to
our plans or our timing or our next
steps just inky darkness and a jungle
all around us and a very good
opportunity to practice our patience we
realized something that night we had
been the only agitated people on that
train and we were the best equipped our
family had food and water even sleeping
masks and decks of cards the locals had
scant resources and many of them were
elderly or had infants so now whether
sitting on a Malaysian night train or
sitting in Toronto traffic I endeavour
to take a deep breath gather some
perspective and enjoy the journey as
unpredictable as it may be the fourth
attribute of mental grits
empathy rural Cambodia offered us the
opportunity to deeply enhance our
empathy Cambodians have ample reason to
feel jaded by life one in every two
hundred and seventy Cambodians has an
amputation from a landmine and yet they
were the kindest most generous and
grateful culture we encountered
essentially the opposite of what we
often deal with in our privileged
Western lives we found an opportunity to
stay and volunteer on a small family
farm we were provided simple rooms and
food in exchange for a small sum and a
variety of farm tasks we learned that
the farm headaches
did for a few decades begun when the
family was exiled from Phnom Penh
by Pol Pot they had been intellectuals
but took up farming for survival the
family showed us monuments on their
property dedicated to their father and
uncle who had disappeared with soldiers
one day and were never seen again I
complimented the beauty of a large lotus
pond in their fields and they told me it
was actually the results of an American
b-52 bomber on our last night together
the grandmother sat with us and told us
her own stories of survival during the
era of the Khmer Rouge and The Killing
Fields tales of walking for days with
only rags for clothing of deprivation
and starvation the oddest thing was that
when we broached the subject of anger or
resentment they looked at us as though
we were absurd you see they felt
fortunate very lucky in fact they were
alive and had a thriving farm this
glimpse of understanding these beautiful
lives was one of the greatest gifts of
and finally number five tenacity we were
in our eighth month of travel in our
sixteenth country and we were feeling
pretty worldly and tough Columbia
replied hold my beer the tyrona national
park lies on the northern Caribbean
coast of Columbia we decided to ramp up
our threshold for adventure and go
camping the three-hour hike into the
park offered some of the best beach
views we have ever seen as well as
astonishing 40 degree heat once we
arrived in the park we spent days
exploring remote beaches and snorkeling
and hiking we were happily off the grid
our campsite was right on the beach
simple tense and hammocks and cold
outdoor showers but then one morning we
awoke to our three kids quite ill high
fevers and vomiting and aching typical
gastro illness but under very bad
circumstances as there was no
possibility for communication with the
outside world no phones no Wi-Fi no
email we realized we were on the cusp of
an emergency every bone in my body was
saying act urgently we located a man
with some horses normally used to bring
supplies into the campground with very
rusty Spanish we desperately negotiated
with Carlos who agreed to bring our kids
on horseback to a jungle medic about an
hour and a half away so a three wobbly
nauseous kids on horses and John and I
carrying the packs and jogging behind
them we made it to the jungle medic
after a few hours of care IV fluids and
pain meds
we again propped our kids on horses and
headed for the park exit our son Duncan
was still too ill and weak to stay on
his horse so six men carried him out of
the jungle on a stretcher we were in the
hospital for three days I became ill
within minutes of arriving in the
emergency room and have often wondered
since if some sort of maternal instinct
simply did not allow my body to become
ill until we knew our children were safe
the hospital was a frenzied place it was
loud and bloody and chaotic and dramatic
but this story has a happy ending
we were safely out of the jungle and
completely healed within a few days and
our insurance agent is still laughing at
our claim which includes a receipt for
emergency horseback evacuation and now
we are home and the landscape in which
we find ourselves
looks remarkably similar to the one we
left but we feel so different some days
the changes feel slight and sometimes
they seem staggering with our adventure
every routine was altered and a typical
day was never a typical day and the
further outside of our comfort zone we
traveled the more profoundly changed we
felt we achieved our goal we saw a
meaningful slice of how people really
live around the world we’ve returned
home feeling irreversibly transformed
more open-minded and more gritty so I
leave you with this if a life of deeper
mental grit is your goal then perhaps
make things a little more challenging
and give hard travel a try [Applause]
stairs 3900 steep and slippery stairs
cut into the mountain Rock 3900 stairs
that I had to climb one morning last
November I began the most challenging
day of my life in the middle of the
Himalayan mountains in central Nepal
looking up at those stairs for a little
height perspective the CN tower has
seventeen hundred and seventy-six stairs
so my task that day was like climbing
the stairs of the CN tower a little more
than twice if the CN tower stairs were
made of stone and covered in mud I was
on day four a debilitating head cold and
I was trekking at an altitude I had
never known before I wanted to quit
before I had even begun after the first
1,000 stairs my legs felt like jello and
I had to will them to take every step
upwards after 2,000 stairs my lungs felt
as though they might explode and after
3,000 stairs
finally my resolve collapsed I unstrap
my backpack I threw it on the ground and
I had an enormous cry at the edge of the
mountain but then with some encouraging
words from my family and the blissful
endorphins that occur after tears I
found a reserve of strength but I didn’t
know I had I picked up my backpack and I
strapped it back on and I began
ascending and I made it to the top of
those stairs and the mountain absolute
glory hard situations and in this
instance hard travel make us stronger
last year my husband John and I and our
three kids Angus
Duncan and Clementine left our secure
Canadian homes for the adventure and
challenge of backpacking around the
world nine months 19 countries five
continents sixty-nine thousand
kilometers it was the boldest and
scariest and most wonderful thing we
have ever done and the most
transformational people often ask us
about the genesis of this idea what was
it on our bucket list was it because we
had traveled in our youth was it simple
wanderlust well the answer is yes we had
many motivations for travel in this
manner and not the least of which was
the concept of bottling entitlements
entitlement is a hot topic these days
isn’t it how we’re raising a soft
spoiled generation coddled by schools
and society and helicopter parents lives
that are over controlled and over
protected and we were met with some
opposition some people thought we were
crazy why would you remove your children
from their easy and cushy and
predictable lives but we are contrarians
and by choosing difficult travel we gave
our family the opportunity to foster the
life skills that otherwise may have been
missed or minimized in our daily lives
the opportunity to build the grits
required to manage the massive changes
we had a few guiding principles for our
adventure we focused our time on
off-the-beaten-path destinations place
is uncommon for family travelers places
such as the countryside of Vietnam war
torn Bosnia and the deserts of Peru we
had a small daily budget for our travels
specifically 200 Canadian dollars each
day for five people’s food
accommodations and most travel and most
important of all we lived like the
locals as thoroughly as possible
everywhere we went we stayed in family
homes and hostels and huts we slept
under the stars and we slept under
mosquito nets and often we all slept in
one room we used local transportation
derelict buses and ferries and tuk tuks
and night trains and we ate local
cuisine barbecued crickets chicken’s
feet cow’s heart and steaming cups of
water buffalo milk
we traveled hard this was not a vacation
this was not a holiday this was an
adventure we were in search of authentic
and challenging experiences with the
goal of seeing how people really live
around the world so what makes up this
grit well there are five characteristics
that I observed change to myself and our
family over our journey sacrifice
adaptability patience empathy and
tenacity firstly on sacrifice traveling
minimally taught us to do without for
most of my adult life when preparing for
a typical vacation I would pack it all
shoes for every outfit accessories for
every occasion but this journey was
different on this journey we each had
only one small 7 kilo backpack for all
of our gear I can see some looks of
horror
it was almost unimaginable surviving
with so little socks proved an
interesting challenge as we each had
only three pair so we learned
to wear a pair have a pair in reserve
and have one pair washed and drying
traveling this minimally was a powerful
learning experience and we realized that
often in life the vast majority of our
possessions just unnecessarily weigh us
down the second attribute of mental grit
adaptability sleeping in a new bed or
even with a new pillow can often prove
disruptive well last year we slept in 92
different beds and if one is to believe
the personal growth comes not from
comfort but from discomfort then on our
first night in Greece we all grew
tremendously we had booked an early
morning arrival at the Athens Airport
and much to our surprise our flight
actually landed several hours early and
we were without accommodations until the
next day so lacking a viable plan and
with three exhausted kids in two more
exhausted adults we decided to sleep at
the airport the air conditioning was on
full the fluorescent lights were harsh
and the music hummed just loud enough to
be jarring we had only our backpacks for
pillows and our quick dry towels for
blankets as we talked our kids into
sleep that night on a damp concrete
floor
John and I were filled with doubt and
guilt but we all made it through that
uncomfortable night no worse for wear
and we actually felt a pretty great
sense of accomplishment adaptability has
preserved us as a species and it
preserved us as an exhausted family at
the Athens Airport the third attribute
of mental grit patience we thought it
would be interesting to take an
old-fashioned local train from Malaysia
into Thailand the trip was quite
inexpensive and web reviews suggested it
would be a little rustic but pretty
straightforward
a few hours into our journey we were
rolling along the countryside listening
to the clatter clatter of the tracks
when suddenly Wham we had hit something
something big we had hit a cow hours
later we were back on the tracks again
rolling along now in the darkness it’s a
little hard to believe but there was
another Wham another cow but this time a
more serious derailment ours at the side
of the tracks with no information as to
our plans or our timing or our next
steps just inky darkness and a jungle
all around us and a very good
opportunity to practice our patience we
realized something that night we had
been the only agitated people on that
train and we were the best equipped our
family had food and water even sleeping
masks and decks of cards the locals had
scant resources and many of them were
elderly or had infants so now whether
sitting on a Malaysian night train or
sitting in Toronto traffic I endeavour
to take a deep breath gather some
perspective and enjoy the journey as
unpredictable as it may be the fourth
attribute of mental grits
empathy rural Cambodia offered us the
opportunity to deeply enhance our
empathy Cambodians have ample reason to
feel jaded by life one in every two
hundred and seventy Cambodians has an
amputation from a landmine and yet they
were the kindest most generous and
grateful culture we encountered
essentially the opposite of what we
often deal with in our privileged
Western lives we found an opportunity to
stay and volunteer on a small family
farm we were provided simple rooms and
food in exchange for a small sum and a
variety of farm tasks we learned that
the farm headaches
did for a few decades begun when the
family was exiled from Phnom Penh
by Pol Pot they had been intellectuals
but took up farming for survival the
family showed us monuments on their
property dedicated to their father and
uncle who had disappeared with soldiers
one day and were never seen again I
complimented the beauty of a large lotus
pond in their fields and they told me it
was actually the results of an American
b-52 bomber on our last night together
the grandmother sat with us and told us
her own stories of survival during the
era of the Khmer Rouge and The Killing
Fields tales of walking for days with
only rags for clothing of deprivation
and starvation the oddest thing was that
when we broached the subject of anger or
resentment they looked at us as though
we were absurd you see they felt
fortunate very lucky in fact they were
alive and had a thriving farm this
glimpse of understanding these beautiful
lives was one of the greatest gifts of
and finally number five tenacity we were
in our eighth month of travel in our
sixteenth country and we were feeling
pretty worldly and tough Columbia
replied hold my beer the tyrona national
park lies on the northern Caribbean
coast of Columbia we decided to ramp up
our threshold for adventure and go
camping the three-hour hike into the
park offered some of the best beach
views we have ever seen as well as
astonishing 40 degree heat once we
arrived in the park we spent days
exploring remote beaches and snorkeling
and hiking we were happily off the grid
our campsite was right on the beach
simple tense and hammocks and cold
outdoor showers but then one morning we
awoke to our three kids quite ill high
fevers and vomiting and aching typical
gastro illness but under very bad
circumstances as there was no
possibility for communication with the
outside world no phones no Wi-Fi no
email we realized we were on the cusp of
an emergency every bone in my body was
saying act urgently we located a man
with some horses normally used to bring
supplies into the campground with very
rusty Spanish we desperately negotiated
with Carlos who agreed to bring our kids
on horseback to a jungle medic about an
hour and a half away so a three wobbly
nauseous kids on horses and John and I
carrying the packs and jogging behind
them we made it to the jungle medic
after a few hours of care IV fluids and
pain meds
we again propped our kids on horses and
headed for the park exit our son Duncan
was still too ill and weak to stay on
his horse so six men carried him out of
the jungle on a stretcher we were in the
hospital for three days I became ill
within minutes of arriving in the
emergency room and have often wondered
since if some sort of maternal instinct
simply did not allow my body to become
ill until we knew our children were safe
the hospital was a frenzied place it was
loud and bloody and chaotic and dramatic
but this story has a happy ending
we were safely out of the jungle and
completely healed within a few days and
our insurance agent is still laughing at
our claim which includes a receipt for
emergency horseback evacuation and now
we are home and the landscape in which
we find ourselves
looks remarkably similar to the one we
left but we feel so different some days
the changes feel slight and sometimes
they seem staggering with our adventure
every routine was altered and a typical
day was never a typical day and the
further outside of our comfort zone we
traveled the more profoundly changed we
felt we achieved our goal we saw a
meaningful slice of how people really
live around the world we’ve returned
home feeling irreversibly transformed
more open-minded and more gritty so I
leave you with this if a life of deeper
mental grit is your goal then perhaps
make things a little more challenging
and give hard travel a try [Applause]
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