hello everybody it’s like the black
church was supposed to speak back hello
so the other day my girlfriend came up
to me and she said are you excited about
doing this talk and I think she expected
me to say oh my god best experience ever
I cannot believe this is happening
instead I looked at her and I was like
okay if excited means running to the
bathroom and popping to imodium before I
go out I’m thrilled proud anybody who
knows me knows that I tell it like it is
and that’s who I am but I’m really
really excited to be here I flew in
yesterday from New York I used to live
in Chicago so I came in on the blue line
and I remembered just like riding our
bikes to Wrigley from Uptown and raising
my children here in Chicago but I’ll
never forget the one thing that brought
me to this city which is in 1995 I got
my dream job as a producer at the Oprah
Winfrey Show and for 15 years it was the
most incredible professional ride of my
lifetime and when that show ended I
decided to take a leap of faith and
start a production company and what that
meant was I had to sell TV shows in
order to keep that company open in
anybody who knows that business knows
that is not an easy task so we would
have to go to New York and go to LA and
pitch shows to network executives and we
did this dozens of times but I’ll never
forget the first time that we went out
to pitch because we learned a big lesson
we get on the plane we go out to LA and
we get in the room with these Hollywood
executives and it is a love fest oh my
god love the Oprah show Oh
one show you produced it was so good
this pitch is fantastic and tell us
about your production company oh great
great great
oh we were full we took the bait we got
on the plane and flew back to Chicago
and my my producer friend who was with
me we looked at each other and we said
it’s not a matter of if we sell a show
it’s which offer are we gonna take three
weeks goes by and the phone doesn’t ring
crickets for whatever reason that those
ideas did not work for their network
they were not going to say that in the
room they weren’t going to say something
that was going to hurt our feelings nor
were they gonna sit there and feel the
angst that we would feel if they said no
so they literally said anything in the
room and when I think back to that
experience I think don’t we all say
anything in the room when I was growing
up we used to go to my god parents house
for cookouts because they had a pool and
my godfather love to grill but what he
liked to do on the grill is burn the
meat
he loved the way the burnt stuff tasted
when he burned the meat so as a kid I
have my plate and I run up to the grill
I’m happy and I get up there and he
plops charred remains on my plate and
I’m looking at that chicken like there
is no way on earth I’m eating that and
while I’m thinking it and having the
moment I see my mother out of the corner
of my eye and she says to me you need to
peel off that burnt stuff and eat that
chicken and you better not say anything
and you know what that is how we are
raised we are raised to tell little
white lies to make people feel better
and we do it in every aspect of our life
we do it with our friends we do it with
our family strangers we even do it with
our co-workers think about your annual
review that you have at work and for the
record hate them hate them and you know
why because you’ll walk in the room and
you know that there are one or two
things that are gonna come up and you’re
prepared but inevitably two or three
things come out that were never
mentioned and you think to yourself wait
a minute that was four months ago that
was six months ago
had somebody said something I could have
been better
I could have done better but nobody
wanted to tell the truth nobody wanted
to tell the truth so when I started my
production company I did something
radical I got rid of performance reviews
by Felicia
no more reviews done because I was going
to manage in the moment when I see
something I say something I’m gonna tell
the truth every day and that took
courage because as we can see it’s not
easy to tell the truth so I mustered the
everyday courage to tell the truth but
what I quickly realized
is that not only do people not want to
tell the truth they don’t want to hear
challenging so I had to figure out a way
that I could tell the truth in a way
that showed I wanted to help and that I
cared so I added a little humor and
three words said with love three words
said with love the other day I went into
the control room at the view on ABC
where I’m one of the executive producers
and I go in and they have prepared a set
for an upcoming segment and everyone’s
happy they loved it they had the look in
the colors and the music and they’re
waiting for me to sign off and I’m
thinking to myself that is the ugliest
that I have seen
in years and I now have to tell them the
truth so every day when I walk into the
control and I say what’s up control room
everybody’s happy hey candy hey and I
said hey it looks like spring threw up
and it got a laugh but most importantly
they could hear it and we were able to
make it better because I genuinely
wanted to help but there is a caveat to
telling the truth
you have to tell the truth responsibly
and you have to tell the truth with good
intentions when you say it with love
that means you say it to help not to
hurt you say it for a purpose not to
gain power and you say it for connection
not for control I mean think about
what’s happening right now in our
country people are saying their truths
that are bigoted mean-spirited hurtful
and sometimes down right cruel and
because of that we can no longer sit
back and say nothing I know you see it
it’s on Twitter viral videos that are
just awful I see them in our hot topics
meetings that we have in the mornings
and again when these things happen we
can’t sit and say nothing because when
we see truths backed by bad intention it
literally cripples us it makes us
question our humanity for each other and
the civility that we once had where is
it so I challenge all of you that when
you see something say something
responsibly share truth every day with
good intentions because these moments
happen every single day so the
opportunities are there and the most
important thing that you can do and
sharing a truth to help and show people
that you care is to say it with love and
mean it thank you
[Applause]
[Music] [Applause]
church was supposed to speak back hello
so the other day my girlfriend came up
to me and she said are you excited about
doing this talk and I think she expected
me to say oh my god best experience ever
I cannot believe this is happening
instead I looked at her and I was like
okay if excited means running to the
bathroom and popping to imodium before I
go out I’m thrilled proud anybody who
knows me knows that I tell it like it is
and that’s who I am but I’m really
really excited to be here I flew in
yesterday from New York I used to live
in Chicago so I came in on the blue line
and I remembered just like riding our
bikes to Wrigley from Uptown and raising
my children here in Chicago but I’ll
never forget the one thing that brought
me to this city which is in 1995 I got
my dream job as a producer at the Oprah
Winfrey Show and for 15 years it was the
most incredible professional ride of my
lifetime and when that show ended I
decided to take a leap of faith and
start a production company and what that
meant was I had to sell TV shows in
order to keep that company open in
anybody who knows that business knows
that is not an easy task so we would
have to go to New York and go to LA and
pitch shows to network executives and we
did this dozens of times but I’ll never
forget the first time that we went out
to pitch because we learned a big lesson
we get on the plane we go out to LA and
we get in the room with these Hollywood
executives and it is a love fest oh my
god love the Oprah show Oh
one show you produced it was so good
this pitch is fantastic and tell us
about your production company oh great
great great
oh we were full we took the bait we got
on the plane and flew back to Chicago
and my my producer friend who was with
me we looked at each other and we said
it’s not a matter of if we sell a show
it’s which offer are we gonna take three
weeks goes by and the phone doesn’t ring
crickets for whatever reason that those
ideas did not work for their network
they were not going to say that in the
room they weren’t going to say something
that was going to hurt our feelings nor
were they gonna sit there and feel the
angst that we would feel if they said no
so they literally said anything in the
room and when I think back to that
experience I think don’t we all say
anything in the room when I was growing
up we used to go to my god parents house
for cookouts because they had a pool and
my godfather love to grill but what he
liked to do on the grill is burn the
meat
he loved the way the burnt stuff tasted
when he burned the meat so as a kid I
have my plate and I run up to the grill
I’m happy and I get up there and he
plops charred remains on my plate and
I’m looking at that chicken like there
is no way on earth I’m eating that and
while I’m thinking it and having the
moment I see my mother out of the corner
of my eye and she says to me you need to
peel off that burnt stuff and eat that
chicken and you better not say anything
and you know what that is how we are
raised we are raised to tell little
white lies to make people feel better
and we do it in every aspect of our life
we do it with our friends we do it with
our family strangers we even do it with
our co-workers think about your annual
review that you have at work and for the
record hate them hate them and you know
why because you’ll walk in the room and
you know that there are one or two
things that are gonna come up and you’re
prepared but inevitably two or three
things come out that were never
mentioned and you think to yourself wait
a minute that was four months ago that
was six months ago
had somebody said something I could have
been better
I could have done better but nobody
wanted to tell the truth nobody wanted
to tell the truth so when I started my
production company I did something
radical I got rid of performance reviews
by Felicia
no more reviews done because I was going
to manage in the moment when I see
something I say something I’m gonna tell
the truth every day and that took
courage because as we can see it’s not
easy to tell the truth so I mustered the
everyday courage to tell the truth but
what I quickly realized
is that not only do people not want to
tell the truth they don’t want to hear
challenging so I had to figure out a way
that I could tell the truth in a way
that showed I wanted to help and that I
cared so I added a little humor and
three words said with love three words
said with love the other day I went into
the control room at the view on ABC
where I’m one of the executive producers
and I go in and they have prepared a set
for an upcoming segment and everyone’s
happy they loved it they had the look in
the colors and the music and they’re
waiting for me to sign off and I’m
thinking to myself that is the ugliest
that I have seen
in years and I now have to tell them the
truth so every day when I walk into the
control and I say what’s up control room
everybody’s happy hey candy hey and I
said hey it looks like spring threw up
and it got a laugh but most importantly
they could hear it and we were able to
make it better because I genuinely
wanted to help but there is a caveat to
telling the truth
you have to tell the truth responsibly
and you have to tell the truth with good
intentions when you say it with love
that means you say it to help not to
hurt you say it for a purpose not to
gain power and you say it for connection
not for control I mean think about
what’s happening right now in our
country people are saying their truths
that are bigoted mean-spirited hurtful
and sometimes down right cruel and
because of that we can no longer sit
back and say nothing I know you see it
it’s on Twitter viral videos that are
just awful I see them in our hot topics
meetings that we have in the mornings
and again when these things happen we
can’t sit and say nothing because when
we see truths backed by bad intention it
literally cripples us it makes us
question our humanity for each other and
the civility that we once had where is
it so I challenge all of you that when
you see something say something
responsibly share truth every day with
good intentions because these moments
happen every single day so the
opportunities are there and the most
important thing that you can do and
sharing a truth to help and show people
that you care is to say it with love and
mean it thank you
[Applause]
[Music] [Applause]
Please follow and like us: