house we had to clear up most of the
closets in one closet I found photo
albums lots of photo albums in one
picture taken 17 years ago I saw a brown
haired brown eyed woman in her 30s with
her arms wrapped around a light brown
haired green-eyed man in Newport Beach
California they are my parents this
couple divorced in january 2004 when i
was three months old being a parent is
obviously not a part-time job it’s
actually the opposite you go along for
the whole ride from start to finish nope
it’s doves Society has painted a picture
of a perfect family the ones that you
see in the movies are the ones that come
up when you search family on Google just
because Society has painted this picture
does not mean that it has to be your
picture you need to create your own when
you visualize a family what do you see
whatever comes into your mind is most
likely the picture that society paints
usually it’s a mom dad and the children
this picture of the perfect family has
been adopted by many generations but in
reality less than forty three percent of
American children are living this life
of about 12 million single-parent
families 84.1 percent are headed by
single mothers only fifteen point nine
percent are headed by single fathers
this means that many that many mothers
have to play both their will and the
role the father my mom is one of these
mothers today one in every four children
grows up without a father about
seventeen point four million American
children I am one of those children so
to put my life into context I am one of
the eighty four percent of the twelve
million children growing up with a
single parent that is growing up with a
single mother from the beginning my mom
always should my mom showed immense
strength with playing both the role of
the mother and the father usually going
to sports games and enrolling the kids
is the dad’s job but by the time I was
five I was enrolled in the traditional
girls sports and activities like dance
and gymnastics was also enrolled in
soccer tennis and swimming growing up
with a single mom you would think that I
was raised with a pink princess outlook
even though I did have my pink princess
face I eventually grow out of it Jim
sticks and dance I soon realized that my
lack of flexibility and tough attitude
made me the perfect candidate to play
sports I probably would never have
realized this without the willingness of
my mom to put me in sports even though I
gotten did all the same things with my
mom that people did with their dads I
still felt there was an emotional aspect
missing I soon realized that I had a
whole community of people that love me
that did fill this gap I just didn’t
notice I always got great support from
my mom and practically the rest of my
family whether it was my aunt who taught
me to be strong my other on who taught
me to always work my hardest my cousin
who is practically my sister who taught
me to enjoy every moment my uncle who
taught me that life is better when
you’re laughing my grandparents who
taught me to strive for the best and
nothing less or the weinsteins the
neighbors who taught me that family
doesn’t always mean blood some people
might say that I missed out on so many
things because I didn’t have a dad but
the truth is I don’t think I did anymore
going through these experiences maybe
put up walls and I ended up not trusting
people easily or sometimes not even at
all in first grade after my dad left to
go back to California I started showing
signs of separation anxiety towards my
mom I thought she was the only person I
had in my corner and when she left me at
school she was actually going to leave
me this problem was not solved right
away it actually took a few weeks of
therapy and meaning a good friend this
made it easier for me to transfer from a
home environment where my mom was to a
school environment where my mom wasn’t
to this day I still find it hard to talk
about how I feel or trust people though
these experiences build these walls they
made me stronger because I had to find a
way to tear them down growing up with a
single parent has shown me that just
because something is perceived one way
by society does not mean that it turns
out or is that way I want to tell this
story now that’s is that because I want
to change the way society makes people
think I think this is important
especially now that society has but one
set expectation for a family I love and
appreciate my family I guess you could
say got the best of both worlds it isn’t
perfect but then again what is thank you [Applause]