what really matters what really matters
to you and when you think about that I
don’t think your material possessions
matter that much I heard people crying
and and talking about they lost
everything and I wanted to us to say to
them through the television but you’re
still here
you lost all your material things but
you’re still here I know someone who has
lost someone who meant something to them
in a storm and that’s different than
living losing everything in your house
that’s different when you lose your
material possessions so you come outside
and your car has been picked up from
non-payment that’s different if you’re
still here if you’ve not suffered some
crippling disabling accident you’re
still here you still have your right
mind embrace that strengthen what’s left
and reflect and activate a spirit of
gratitude that you’re grateful be
thankful for what’s left take a deep
breath if you if you made it because
that’s important gratitude
things that we take for granted I’m
thinking about the challenge that I had
when I was speaking on stage from a
wheelchair and because of SATA campaign
I couldn’t lift up the weight of my body
because of the pain I couldn’t stand up
on stage and walk back and forth as I
have been accustomed to doing because of
the pain I couldn’t put myself in the
bathtub and get out I needed help to get
in and to get out and now things that I
take
granted I’m thankful if I wake up and
have a pain-free morning I’m thankful
I’m grateful for the ability to see to
hear to move to to be able to voice my
dream and to inspire and to motivate
people I want you to think about what is
it as you reflect on your life that
you’re grateful for and and I just
started something that I’m doing I write
down each day 7 things that I’m grateful
for 7 things the relationships that mean
something to me the friendships that
being something to me the blessings that
come my way
I met someone and the shopping mall and
he and I began to think his meant to
communicate his name is Ray and I really
considered it a god moment I’m wearing a
shirt that says to boycott the NFL the
National Football League in in in
support of Colin copper dink and and
this guy he said I’m down with you
brother and he and I started a
conversation and it seemed like we have
known each other forever and we
exchanged information and this is a new
friendship then I’m very grateful for
who will be able able to be a blessing
to my granddaughter his name is Ray has
a interesting website it’s called a ray
at crime by designed.com
I said that’s a Disney website but I’m
beginning to focus on things that I’m
grateful for I’m grateful that that I
was able to survive Irma and javi and
and and some of you listening should be
grateful that it didn’t hit your city
that you you did not go through the
devastation of what Houston went through
or the devastation what other cities
have been doing what Miami and in
Florida is going through and so reflect
on your life and think about when you go
through it
whatever that might be because there are
all types of hurricanes in life that
you’re grateful for the next thing is is
to refocus marinating ourselves in it
and continuing to look back we can
become paralyzed and stuck and as fast
as we can we have to not only reflect on
what matters and what it is that we’re
grateful for but to refocus our mind
about what is it we want to do we don’t
know how much time we have left I was
going to reach out to a young man that I
met at Fox TV who lost his job and in
the process of reaching out to him I
heard the news that his son died as well
I mean to lose your job and then your
child dies it was in college Wow bam bam
back to back and I know what it is to
have back-to-back storms in your life
when my talk show was cancelled went
through a divorce from someone that I
loved very much it my mother was
diagnosed with breast cancer and passed
and my best friend boo was waiting on a
liver transplant and he died and during
that time that I was also diagnosed with
prostate cancer
I got back-to-back blows and and when
you go through that that it’s a time to
get still and to reflect and to
strengthen what’s left and and then as
quick as you possibly can to refocus
your mind because you can get stuck for
a period of time I got stuck I was
ashamed and embarrassed that my show had
been cancelled I was shame and
embarrassed that I talked to people of
our being successful and I I wasn’t able
to make my marriage work and and so as
as you look at your life and and look at
the things that you want to do that
focusing when you’ve gone through
something is very important because if
you don’t if you continue to look back
and and and talk about it and focus on
it it will drain you emotionally and
spiritually and and it will it will draw
all the energy out of you you know the
Helen Keller says when one door closes
another door opens but most of us spend
so much time looking at the closed door
that that we don’t see the open door
what are those new opportunities that
life is presenting us that we can begin
to refocus our mind a time I energy in
our spirit and finding our purpose and
new meaning in life and the third thing
is it’s not only once we reflect on what
really matters and and and strengthen
that and and refocus our minds on on the
new chapters in our lives that we have
the power to write a new script but we
have to recalibrate we have to ignite
our spirit that when I went through my
divorce I parked for a while I parked
when my mother passed from breast cancer
I was another blow I park when when bull
died I was holding my best friend’s hand
and saw him when he took his last breath
then and I remember the door in the
hospital room open and his mother said
come in Holy Spirit and take my boy
I rose and I talked and and those
back-to-back blows for a period of time
I couldn’t think about anything but them
to people that that cost me to be Who I
am my mother and my best friend rule
that we were together and inseparable
from second grade in elementary school
at Douglas Elementary School in Miami
Florida in Overtown and so it took me
some time to recalibrate to connect with
my energy it took me some time to find
my Center to find my strength I remember
and I’m just recalling an engagement I
had in Washington DC two weeks after I
had eulogized my mother and I thought I
was emotionally ready to handle it and I
lost it I lost it in the middle of my
message in the pulpit a Sunday morning
and I mentioned my mother and what are
the things I I train speakers never ever
tell a story that you don’t have the
emotional strip to handle because it it
that the the pulpit is not a place for
therapy or the stage and and so I
realized that I needed to do some more
internal work that that sometimes life
can slap you senseless and you don’t
know which way is up and so reflecting
refocusing and recalibrating those are
three steps I feel that will empower us
to recover from the hits of life because
they’re gonna happen I don’t care who
you are look at how beautiful you are
like if you tithes every day or every
Sunday I don’t care if you pray all the
time you will not escape life is gonna
happen to all of us I remember asking
God for a sign if you are real if you
are real give me a sign I’ve never asked
you this before give me a sign let my
mother live and she died and and the
to gather my strength and maintain my
faith I remember the story of Shadrach
but anyhow I remember when they were
talking to Nebuchadnezzar and and and he
talked to them he wanted them to bow and
it said oh oh King listen you know we
will not violate you might kill us but
if it be so we still go bow you could do
whatever you gonna do whatever threats
you have whatever would tickets you’re
selling but we’re not going to bow and
that meant to me that I’m not going to
bow to what her hand that life has dealt
me that even though I wanted my mother
to live and I knew God had the power to
to give me that to grant me that request
I still will not bow to not having faith
I still will not bow to depression and
despair and feeling sorry for myself and
being angry I still won’t bow and so I
feel that that as Willy jolly says that
a setup is a setback so a setback is a
setup for a comeback that we have come
back power that in in spite of what
we’ve gone through in spite of what we
are dealing with in spite of what we
have lost
we have come back power in spite of the
defeats in spite of the rejections in
spite of the failures and the
devastation and and all the things that
life can throw at us Willy was right
setback is a setup for a comeback we
have come back power
must remember it’s easy to to say oh I
know you’ll never leave me nor forsake
me when I bills are paid and the car
hasn’t been repossessed it and our home
hasn’t been foreclosed on and we have
our help and our children are healthy
it’s easy it’s easy to have faith in and
say god is good all the time and all the
time
god is good yeah right but when life
knocks on the door yeah what you got to
say now what do you have to say now you
lose your job you lose your health you
prayed I remember sitting in the
University Hospital and they gave me an
MRI I remember the young man coming down
the hall to meet me the radiology and he
said you know and he had tears in his
eyes man
he said I was in a dark place and you
help me you help me and he said and I
was praying when I did your MRI I was
praying I didn’t see anything but just
you being cancer free and he said I
don’t have good news and I said my
brother you just gave me some good news
number-one youth that my voice my story
helped you come out of a dark place and
and you were here and if there’s anyone
that I want to deliver this kind of news
to me
it would be someone who are know loves
me who cares about me and who does not
just see me as another person here and
the place that I’m living my life is
judge not according to appearances that
cheat you holding in your hand does not
determine by prognosis it might reflect
diagnosis but God determined by
prognosis it is well all is well because
I know he’ll never leave me nor forsake
me and that’s where I stand in the end
and we both embrace each other with
tears that tears the gratitude that’s an
apple cider I’m not surrendering to this
or kick cancers but trust me on this I’m
shining my shoes now and I truly believe
that life is a fight for territory we
must fight a good fight
with whatever we go through I truly
believe that life is a fight for
territory and once you stop fighting for
what it is you want that’s peace of mind
that’s your health that’s your
relationship that’s your children that’s
your future your healing whatever you
stop fighting for what you don’t want
will automatically take over and my
mother didn’t raise a punk she raised a
fighter and I say to you it’s in your
DNA whether you realize it or not
whether you agree with me or not that
there’s a purpose there’s a power in you
greater is he that is is you that he
visited the world
the adversities the setbacks the defeats
the devastation yeah yeah yeah you got
it like that don’t let her not you’re
made in the likeness and image of God if
you beginner you’ve been given authority
and dominion over everything then say
something over everything
as my mother would say put that in your
pipe and smoke it you have something
special you have greatness than you
reflect we focused recalibrate recover
that’s my story and I’m sticking to it
Stacy that’s what baby brown would say
I tell you what you said two words have
not been smoking because you’re gonna go
through some things I just had to Oh
mime you as one of my girlfriend’s
mothers would say when my website was
hacked so you know things also when the
crazy things happen and you just put it
all in perspective and you do exactly
what you said we flex we focus we
calibrate and we do be covered look see
how they read rejuvenate I did I took a
break to rejuvenate after some things
happen because we live in a life where
as you said less we’re not exempt but we
have to choose to not stay stuck in
repeating the same old story in our head
and be able to to move forward I mean
that’s a powerful word and as you talked
about Boehner posing that question I had
a few people just finding it very
difficult to deal with their day-to-day
life because they’ve been watching the
devastation and there’s just so sucked
into everything that they wrap paralyzed
said I can’t even I can’t function I
can’t work it’s just watching people and
their lives be destroyed and I said well
that’s not going to help change but what
you can do is organize some relief
efforts do take an action and not just
get stuck in the feeling of being
hopeless or thinking that you’re
hopeless and your message tonight is so
timely because a lot of people all
across this country are just in a state
laundry and they need to know what to do
next and you just gave them no more
excuses because there is always
something to be grateful for once
there’s life there’s hope and as you
said people are still alive you might
lost lose property or be displaced but
you’re alive you’re breathing you can
rebuild but what we can’t do is we
create your life absolutely and you know
and and I want to talk about refocus
something just came to me
I found myself glued to the television
and obsessed with this crazy man out of
North Korea this this little young chump
that happened because of this up because
of a sperm he was born in North Korea
had he not been the sperm from his
father he’d be a kid somewhere in a
basement playing video games but now
this little fat jump has his hands on
nuclear weapons and so I found myself
looking at and monitoring the the wolf
tickets between him and the President
and I and getting nervous thing are
these two people about to annihilate the
planet because with nuclear weapons you
know it doesn’t take much for a crazy
person to push a button and then I had
to ask myself what can you do about this
what can you do about how is this
serving you monitoring this reading what
the the head of North Korea saying and
what President Trump is saying does that
help you is it purposeful what meaning
and value is it bringing to you and I
found myself sucked in with all the
weather reports and I had to stop head
to back away and say well I’m going to
do
I can to preserve my mental bandwidth
there’s some things I just don’t need to
let in there’s certain thing I don’t
watch violent movies I don’t want to
watch or hear about any negative tragic
things you know there’s a I remember
that play don’t nobody don’t bring me no
bad news you know I was concerned about
my my kids and grandchildren in
Jacksonville and my sister it needs to
nephew and and my brother in in Miami
and that’s natural but I had to to begin
to scale down my exposure to negative
news because it was robbing me of my
peace of mind and my energy you can
either live your dreams or live your
fears and I think the majority of people
actually are not living their dreams but
are living their fears so I want to ask
what are you afraid of what are you
scared of because we all have fears
don’t we we all have something that’s
blocking us that’s holding us back and
as we began to look at life what we
realize is that the reason that most
people are not living out their true
potential and not doing all of the
things that they would really like to do
it’s because of fear some people called
fear false evidence or expectations
appearing real
a reminded of the story of a guy that
was living in an area where he had some
new neighbors and these neighbors had a
bulldog and when he came home every day
this Bulldog used to chase him about a
half a block from his house every day he
would have to streak home I mean he was
just run this bulldog be right on his
heels and so he just got tired of that
because he would go home about a half a
block away from home he would look
around for this Bulldog and he would see
and he would go walking casually long
and this Bulldog come out of nowhere
well it’s not chasing him here to run
home so this one day he just got tired
and so when the Bulldog was running
after him he started running he saw a
rock and he stopped to pick it up to
throw out the Bulldog and when the
Bulldog got up low on him he started
barking he realized the Bulldog didn’t
have any teeth it is about gum you know
and so you know what most people go
through life running scared running
scared from things that have no teeth in
them because they’re false expectations
appearing real let’s see we’re brilliant
enough to scare ourselves to death you
realize that there are some people
actually who get a kick out of scaring
themselves to death
I remember the last frightening movie I
saw it was the Exorcist I will never
forget I was so frightened when I came
home
I’ll never forgot drove in the driveway
and I had already called my former wife
and said listen turn the lights on I was
coming in the driveway and I and I was
getting out of the car and all of a
sudden I couldn’t get out of side blow
my horn I said ma’am but they got me
they got me she came to the kitchen when
was right out of my wits but there are
lot of people who think you know for
that love I’m the person that my brother
is a paratrooper my twin brother he’s in
the military career man
I would love to jump out of an airplane
to parachute I’m scared though I mean I
really had my brother brother for that I
would really love to be macho man like
that what are the things that you fear
that’s been keeping you from living your
dream that’s been keeping you from doing
some things that you would like to do
just think about those things and how do
we begin to handle that Abraham Maslow
said that the life is about growth and
he said you could either go back to your
comfort zone and there you won’t find
any growth or you must Willie be willing
to go forward and face your fears again
and again and again because you’re never
going to have a fear free existence I
mean some fear is acceptable and
legitimate there are some things that
you you really should be afraid of now
you shouldn’t allow it to immobilize you
you acknowledge it you take it into
account and you carry yourself
accordingly there are times that we
should proceed with caution but it’s the
difference between being stopped by fear
is the difference between having a fear
and the fear having you so what do we do
1 acknowledge it
and knowing that it’s okay don’t condemn
yourself for being afraid it’s perfectly
fine to have some fears you acknowledge
your fears you embrace those fears and
then you move on you act on whatever it
is that you fear because once you
embrace it see what you resist will
persist what you resist will persist so
one of the most important things is is
to begin to embrace your fear the fear
of bodily harm that’s legitimate when I
was a disc jockey in Columbus Ohio you
know I was young right 22 23 but I was
tough and I was on the air and Al Green
who was a great performer at that time
and still is now now singing gospel
music had a record his first hit record
was backup train so a guy came in the
town and was impersonating Al Green I
happened to know al green because I’d
already booked him and so when I found
out this guy was impersonating Al Green
I came on the air and did an editorial
about it and I exposed him he was rather
big fellow and so he had the word out
that when I see this guy less from the
disc jockey I’m a knockin my mouth with
having a big mouth
so I was driving down Main Street in
Columbus Ohio had my son in a car and I
always have this little saying hey if
anybody will put a threat on me I’m
gonna make him honor it so I saw this
guy on the street so I pull around I say
excuse me I’ll be right back got out of
the car
hey man I heard you said that you were
looking for me I’m les Brown he said you
are say yeah I said what is it I’m the
one that said that you were an imposter
I said I want to know what you’re gonna
do about it he open his coat he had a
gun there I say but whatever I said to
acknowledge your fear scare yourself
accordingly and do what makes sense for
you well one major fear I’ve always had
it’s a fear of the dentist and this fear
had me I didn’t have that fear and what
really and for in faucet you got to
watch things that can feed your fear I
saw a movie that most people would not
remember this movie was starring Dustin
Hoffman era thon man with Laurence
Olivier when he’s trying to get a
confession out of here and he took this
drill out let me tell you someone he
went in dunk my Hoffman’s mouth with
that drill I had a dollar worth of
popcorn that pop go whatever
you know I could not go to the dentist
for five years I left broadcasting went
to the Ohio Legislature had an impacted
wisdom tooth now that hurts and I would
call and soon as the people would answer
the phone I would hang up I stopped
writing about dr. Hamlet office boom
about hey then I got to the point where
I could just ask for an appointment
hello and I wouldn’t give my real name
because I knew I would go keep I’d give
anybody’s name Joe jiggler Jim it did
better but pretty soon I got to the
point where I could give my name it was
about four years after that
so my name is les Ryan then I’ll call
back and say look here due to my
legislative agenda I won’t be able to
make it so the lady finally said her
phone said you’re scared aren’t you
I said no I’m not then why
don’t you come in that’s none of your
she said you’re not coming in because
you’re scared I wish you just would not
waste our time and she hung up I said
you have no right to do that to people
like me you know
so finally it’ll make a long this short
I was hurting so bad it’s a way to man
I’ve got to do something and I said what
am I afraid of go there and handle
that’s it man I said dr. Hamill I just
can’t hear this drill I mean if you can
do whatever I just don’t I don’t need to
hear this drill this drill that sound
you know that’s the what gets me that
drill don’t pull that drill out on me
you suggest calm down kana and it wasn’t
really bad as I thought it was one of
the things you find out that when you
face your fears is not as bad as you
think it is and when people tell you I
just can’t do that
I can’t handle I mean really really I
can’t handle it what they’re envisioning
is that they’re not going to be if
they’re gonna clock out like you’re
going to die guess what we all that
occasions when we confronted our fears
we had to do something we felt
uncomfortable with we didn’t want to do
it and we did not die then it come take
us and put us in a box somewhere and all
right so what we’ve got to begin to do
how do we handle that what’s the process
because it’s all up in here one I think
is imagine the worst-case scenario I
just imagined that he went in my mouth
and with this drill and that I just
croaked out then I imagine that’s the
worst-case scenario then I had another
technique I used visualize yourself
being more than able and capable of
handling it but I used to have a
tremendous infinity complex about
speaking before people that I felt who
had more going for them than I did
because I’m not college trained I used
to feel that college people were the
most intelligent people on the planet
and there was nothing I had to say for
them and what would that what will they
listen to me for that that’s the way I
felt and so I had to visualize myself
speaking before them speaking before
various audiences that had more going
for them than I did and realize and
appreciate my own value and that I was a
worthwhile person even though I didn’t
have all going for me I didn’t have the
money I didn’t have the education that
they had so part of the process is
seeing yourself being worthy being
capable having what you need to make
your worthwhile person and that you’re
more than able and that you deserve to
be listened to or you deserve to have
that dream and that passion and whatever
it is that you see and envision there
you’ve got to see it in your mind’s eye
and know that you’ve got what it takes
repeat after me please
I must see and my mind’s eye
see myself confronting my fears handling
my fears I’m more than able shake
somebody’s hand on your right and left
so deciding as you look at your life as
you look into the future and say what
fears am i holding on to what fears that
I’m allowing to imprison me that’s
keeping me from breaking out that’s
keeping me from living up to my true
potential that’s keeping me from really
being happy that’s keeping me from
having a sense of adventure and
excitement in my life what’s what’s
keeping me from controlling my destiny
what fears and I’m giving that
permission to notice what I said that we
must give our permission to fear to
immobilize us because whatever
discomfort you experience whatever
challenges a difficulty that it is you
got to handle it got to go up in there
and wrestle with it will it be easy no
will it be challenging yes friend of
mine who’s going into recovery
he’s been addicted to crack cocaine for
years and alcohol he was talking about
how challenging it was and while he was
dreading going on going into cold turkey
I said what do you want me to tell you
that it’s gonna be a picnic no it’s not
it’s gonna kick your butt yes it is are
you gonna want to die yes yes that’s a
part of it but that’s just what you must
go through in order to get where you
want to go and guess what you are strong
enough to do it you’re strong enough and
your life is worth whatever you have to
go through to get past this addiction
whatever you have to do this dream
you’ve got whatever you want to do will
it be easy to just run out there do it
now
will it happen overnight now will it be
a struggle yes
will there be times when you can’t make
ends meet yes that’s a part of it will
there be times you won’t know what to do
yes that’s a part of it will you have
some opposition well things go wrong
sometimes you will have many visits
Murphy now if you say well who’s Martha
somebody must have told us someplace
along the line I don’t know where but
somebody must have told people Oh life
is gonna be real easy if they told you
don’t forget I had a special piece of
legislation I wanted to get past and I
said to a guy so lucky can I count on
your vote he said yes and look here if I
can’t count on to let me know this
another guy that owes midship and I can
call on that and I want need your vote
but I do need it if you say you’re going
to do it do it you say you can count on
it legislation came up he voted against
my bill my bill passed I went back to
hey I told you I needed the vote but if
you couldn’t give it up let me know I
would get somebody else and why are you
telling me he said all right I was in
shock how many of you that life just
wore you out that you didn’t expect that
you thought you go to school get good
grades get a job and you came out here
you’ll be able to get a job a little
they never told me you know that songs
that mama told me there’d be days like
that even tell us that is that something
about life is challenging I mean it’s
some stuff you get out of here you
didn’t read it in a book nowhere then
nobody warned you that it was gonna come
down on you like this it’s called life
there are kind of challenges like that
so what’s the next piece is that you
accept yourself then you accept the fear
as a fact and not a force so when you
accept yourself and you accept fear as a
fact that means that it’s something that
happens it’s something that you’re going
to experience but it is not a force to
hold you back it doesn’t have any
special power other than that that you
give it so you accept the fact that
you’re afraid and then you move on
anyhow you move on past it and you do
whatever you’ve got to do I was at a big
motivational rally for gentleman by the
name of Dexter Jaeger down in the
Carolinas I was standing backstage and I
had to go out I was the last speaker on
the program it’s the first time I’ve
been in a stadium of this size over
10,000 people you couldn’t see the
people because the lights are just
blaring in your eyes called free
enterprise day I was afraid my heart was
beating fast I’ll just pacing back and
forth and ex’s head are you all right I
so I say wait a bit just calm down calm
yourself holding the older it’s all
right les it’s all right all right just
be as scared as you can be mmm
so after I say embrace that fear just
try and see how scared you can really
get and Sabri Medina so the guy came
back and said are you bout to die so I
said no fine but after I started
embracing it and trying to make myself
as afraid as I can get and imagine
what’s the worst thing that I can go out
there do my mind go bleak and I played
I start laughing at myself I start
talking about say you know you scared
today and I said I just calmed myself
down and I went out there and I cooked
and that’s what you got to do I had
another experience where I was at a
major corporation and I was was one of
my first major presentations I was going
to do for this corporation and I had
four other presenters that had large
firms and one of the things that you’ve
got to do is you’ve got to watch your
inner conversation and discipline your
thinking and your imagination because if
you don’t your mind will take you on a
wild trip so my mind said hey les said
what this guy’s gonna wipe you out you
can’t compete with them because I heard
these guys sitting over across from me
and they were talking about all that
they had going for them and so I started
doubting myself and I became afraid and
I was thinking well maybe I shouldn’t go
in there and so I knew then and this is
what I suggest to you sometimes you got
to talk to yourself talking to yourself
you know could be a good exercise might
be the only intelligent conversation you
ever get so I got up and I were in the
bathroom and I start talking to myself
said let’s try let me tell you something
what do you care about these guys and
their firms and all their money you’ve
got six children you’ve got to feed you
got a mama you’ve got to take care of
I wouldn’t that room a little those
people I said don’t you do nothing till
so when you have your lure itself
talking to you telling you what you
can’t do part of what you’ve got to do
is be your own motivator you can you
can’t talk casually to yourself you
can’t stare uh sit down you must calm
down now conscious man will hear that
you’ve got to have a good conversation –
you say hey and answer yourself – don’t
pity people in the attention you answer
yourself
hey what you’re under I’m going in get
off all right very good go ahead and
take care busy you’ve got to talk to
yourself and you build yourself up and
you’ll feel your energy level coming up
and people will feel that around you see
now if you go through life being afraid
people can sense that they can pick up
that fear so that’s why you’ve got to
stand up inside yourself I’m a reminder
of the little boy that was on a bus and
and some bigger fellows who were picking
at him you know and so he wanted to move
from by them they were thinking you on
the head and so he stood up just to get
from by them and they would push him
back down and he would stand up again
they’d push him back down and he stood
up again they pushed him out held him
down he said you might hold me down but
see when you are not filling your life
with the things that you are capable of
doing so we all have some stuff that
we’ve been given and I don’t think that
it’s optional for us to sit on what we
have see if you’re sitting on what you
have what you’ve been given I think
everybody has been given something to
bring to the planet that only you can do
that only you can perform that only you
can initiate that activity and if you
don’t do that if you’re not filling in
your life with your life work or your
mission then there are gaps in your life
and what we do when we’re not living out
our true identity we begin to fill the
gaps we fill the holes with garbage
alcohol drugs worry self-destructive
behavior so when you begin to look at
your life and you know that that you’re
not doing what you can do because you
have allowed yourself to be held captive
by your fears
now when you don’t have a true
appreciation and acceptance for who you
are and you allow yourself to be
immobilized by fear what happens in the
process is that you begin to abused
yourself you begin to sabotage your life
you begin to sabotage your dreams you
begin to unconsciously work against
yourself you become your own worst enemy
so what do you do about that
well you you begin to realize that your
dream and your gifts have so much
meaning and so much value for you till
your hunger for them will begin to push
you past the fear your hunger to have
them will give you a special drive as
you work on yourself as you begin to
acknowledge your true identity the true
power that you have the true capacity
you have to bring about change the
miracle-working power that you have
within yourself to do the things that
you want to do
when you take them on I’m reminded of a
man who this gentleman was doing a
special study of a special tribe in
Africa headhunters and he had difficulty
in developing a relationship with these
tribesmen because of the fact that he
had fear he had a fear that would take
his head a day all fears are bad that
was a legitimate fear that’s a good fear
to give you a headache so he worked
there for a long time with no effort no
progress in developing relationship and
rapport and being able to achieve a
level of trust so finally one night
while he was in bed he was thinking
about said what what is it that you came
here to do what is your life work as a
missionary said I wanted to study these
tribesmen so what’s the worst thing that
they can do to you kill you and he just
decided hey this is what I came here to
do I know that there’s some risk
involved and I’m gonna do it come what
may he said I’m not gonna be afraid of
you he went back to the next day and he
started doing the work and trying to
talk to and interview many of the
members of this tribe and they began to
respond to him they threw out the
welcome mat to him and years later when
people came to see what his progress was
they asked him how were you able to do
this how did you convert the
relationship from being hostile to that
of being positive he said something I
think has value for all of us
he said when life can no longer threaten
you with death so what else is there
what else is there
and the majority of the fears that we
have are not life or death fears and not
those kind of fears but through our
imagination we blow them out of
proportion and we give them more power
than they actually have or deserve and
we permit them to govern our lives we
permit them to determine how far we can
stretch out on our dreams and
discovering our stuff and as we begin to
look at ourselves and and begin to wait
a minute
Jeff’s getting to the point as you
assess yourself in and begin to prove
yourself and just away hole admit Holman
I’ve been sweating this out what can
what’s the worst thing that can happen
to me out of this will it kill me
well I die well why am I going through
all of these changes over this how much
power does this really have and am I the
one that’s feeding the power into it see
a lot of times we we allow ourselves to
be fed and to be programming to to being
afraid of you watch the news and read
the newspaper you’ll be scared to come
out the house am i right you’ll be
afraid so what kinds of things what
kinds of thoughts are you feeding your
consciousness what kind of things are
you putting in your mind that will
enable you to either move forward or to
justify why you’re staying where you are
another piece that I look at that
when I’ve finally decided that I was
gonna go to the dentist pain was so
great I couldn’t hold out any longer all
of a sudden the fear that matter
I can’t what take me not some people
need fear you know have a friend that
that we told him hey man you know you
need to lose some weight you gettin
overweight and out of shape and at our
age we need to have a regular program
and bud said man I’ve been fat since out
um you know I’m big-boned I’ve never
seen a fat skeleton though yeah well bud
became ill how many of you ever seen a
fast kill to raise yeah but became ill
passed out and I was there and the
doctor was talking to him and but I
think was gonna go right back to say no
eating habits and doing everything you
know there’s a look here you are a
diabetic
I said now here’s some of the side
effects you know you could go blind you
can become an amputee none of that
touched him he said you can become
impotent he said what did you say every
day he’s in a body sculpt Rick
48 years young he looks great I can’t
believe for just that one statement made
all the difference in the world but is a
new man to date so what is it that has
to happen to you
some people don’t take corrective
measures to improve their health until
they get a pronouncement that they’re
about to die then they’re starting okay
all right I’m ready to do whatever you
want me to do but they won’t do that
they can see people drop it off like
flies around there well that’s them you
got to go from something we go through
life really blocking ourselves
constantly and fear is one of the the
greatest instruments that we could use
to stifle our true potential when you
begin to to look at your life you can
decide to to use fear as a blocker or
you can decide to use it as building
blocks that you decide hey look here I’m
going to move in this direction I’m not
going to allow anything to stop me from
doing what I want to do we shake
somebody’s hand on your right and left
see when you begin to understand and
acknowledge your fear and you go forth
anyhow
you go forth in a spirit and unknowing
that there’s a way that you can begin to
handle this there’s a way out here
somewhere there’s a solution what it is
that you’re seeking that you have the
capacity to whatever comes up to handle
it to face it and rather than feeling
powerless you begin to feel powerful
see when all of the major downsizings
that are taking place around this
country there are a lot of people who
are biting their fingers and fear that
they might lose their jobs but there are
few people who have decided within
themselves I’m going to make it some
people aren’t waiting to be cut some
people are moving on their own because
they feel within themselves I’ve got
what it takes to make it they’re not
afraid about tomorrow because of how
they see themselves because of what they
feel that they deserve because of what
they feel that they can create for
themselves because these people have
decided as they look at the future as
they look at themselves there’s a way
where there’s a will there’s a way for
me to begin to create a way out of no
way and when you have that kind of
consciousness when you have that kind of
spirit nothing can stop you nothing
what would your life be like as you look
toward the future if you decided I’m not
going to allow my fears to stop me what
would your life be like what would your
future be like if you decided to to want
that which you desire so strongly that
it prepares you past your fears that you
experienced a fear as the one book says
feel the fear and do it anyway what
would your life be like and I’m saying
to you that all of us who have been
entombed by fear have the capacity to
resurrect ourselves and to resurrect our
and you have is it easy no it’s not easy
can I do it yes what’s one of the ways
to get started some of us need somebody
to hold our hands sometimes we need
somebody to help us out be willing to
say I don’t know be willing to reach out
be willing to get some assistance to
take you to the next level of what great
athlete you never expect boxes to make
profound statements I think was Joe
Frazier who said this one he says all of
us are like the blind man at some point
in our lives standing on the corner
waiting for somebody to lead us across
to all of us at some point in our lives
need some help need someone to reach out
to us decide the Lifeline to help us go
cross some treacherous waters that we
couldn’t navigate by ourselves none of
us do it by ourselves all of us at some
point of our lives we need that kind of
help we need that kind of assistance
because we grow from the people we have
in our lives that can enrich our lives
personally professionally spiritually
and all the dimensions of our lives we
don’t grow in a vacuum so if you look at
yourself whatever fears you have that
maybe you need some help and
strengthening yourself in that area as
you assess your strengths and your
weaknesses as you begin to improve
yourself and your passions and your
dreams and your goals and the things
that you want if you decide to
experience all of your true potential as
you decide to manifest all of your
greatness as you decide wait a minute
what what else is available to me out
here if I decided to experience the fear
of rejection the fear of no the fear of
failure the fear of standing by myself
what else is available of taking a
chance of fear
losing it all what else is available to
me that will bring some extra meaning
and value the fear people not liking me
you know how many people do things they
don’t want to do because they want
everybody to like them everybody’s not
good at like you
excuse me special announcement
everybody’s not going to like you know
that’s it’s just not that kind of world
what but you know a lot of people who
won’t take positions on issues who won’t
take a stand for things they believe in
who won’t speak up for themselves
because they don’t want to make anybody
mad oh it was Bill Cosby he said I don’t
know what the secret of success is he
said but here’s what I know what the
secret of failures he said trying to
please everybody you can’t please
everybody but there people who have a
fear of rocking the boat so then just go
alone in life just go along well so how
do you feel well I don’t really want to
say how many of you know people like
that raise your head these people are
living they’re not truly experiencing
life what do you really want to do well
I don’t like this but I guess I’ll go
ahead on and dunno
the life is too short for that too short
and unpredictable moseying through not
trying to disturb anything not trying to
shake anything up not trying to make any
waves you see there are some people who
who come through the universe in their
level of contribution and the level of
energy they manifest is so small so
inconspicuous that when they go you
won’t even know they left I mean they’re
people who died on jobs and and you same
where’s John Oh jump and dead six miles
you’re kidding I guess we did miss it
but there’s some people because of their
personality because of their
contribution because of their the
investment of their time and their
energy and the impact they have their
that when they go everybody will miss
them so when Mother Teresa checks out
everybody will know when Rosa Parks
everybody will know Nelson Mandela
everybody will know what because of
their contribution si but there’s some
people because their contribution is so
small no one will care
some saying before you are boxed and
Barrett decide that you’re gonna box and
bury your fears decide that you’re going
to begin to live life on a new level
it’s seeking out new horizons that you
were to find more love and more joy and
more ways to give more to life God said
something I love this he says everything
a man does for himself
guess what he takes with him but
everything he does for others he leaves
behind so when you begin to say what is
it that I want to leave what
contribution that I want to begin to
make what difference do I want to make
in life what is it that I want to do
with the rest of the life that I have
left what what chances I need to take
what risks do I need to begin to embrace
what fears do I need to step on what
areas of my life am i dead right now
what three you can even live your dreams
or live your fears you have got to get
to a point where you say I’m sick and
tired of living like this there’s got to
be more let’s see that’s when people go
out and strike out on their dreams
that’s when people get out of
relationships where they’re dying
together rather than growing together
that’s where they leave jobs so where
you going to
do you have another job no I don’t what
are you going to make it I don’t know
but I will see you will when you put
yourself in that kind of situation I’m
reminded of two frogs that that were
huffing down the road and they they fell
into a bottle of milk and one was
hopping up and down for a while and he
drowned he just gave up but his on the
Frog just kept on kicking he wouldn’t
give up he just kept on kicking and
pretty soon he churned that milk into butter and he walked on