[Applause]
when I was six years old I watched the
movie Legally Blonde and I fell in love
with Elle Woods
I mean her intelligence her charisma her
amazing shoe collection the girl was
perfect and best of all she went to my
dream school which of course was Harvard
University now I held onto that dream
for a couple of years until one brutal
day when my dreams were crushed upon
discovering the website College
confidential in case you guys don’t know
what that is it’s sort of an online
college admissions forum
regardless after browsing the site for a
couple hours I pretty much decided I was
screwed I became less and less certain
that Harvard or any other college for
that matter really had a place for me so
I decided that doing as much as I could
as fast as I could
would be my ticket to a bright and shiny
future I mean after all how often do you
hear about the nice quiet ordinary girl
next door changing the world
you don’t instead you hear about people
like Jacob Barnett a fourteen-year-old
quantum physicist let me say that one
more time a 14 year old quantum
physicist who is currently expanding
Einstein’s theory of relativity so you
understand my dilemma from a young age I
was certain achievements where the key
to success success was the key to
happiness and happiness well that was
the key to a good life so really really
using the transitive property and I knew
this because I was a very gifted kid
achievements equaled a good life and
just like that I was locked into the
overachiever mindset so I joined chorus
and debate club and math club and art
club and science club and the school’s
literary magazine and the school
newspaper and just about any other club
that there was for the sake of having a
club to put on my college application
and in middle school everything was
wonderful and I was brilliant in the
whole world was just mine to claim until
all of a sudden about three months into
my freshman year when my 15 year old
brain broke in a way that I couldn’t
really imagine time
for the first time I’d forgotten how to
get out of bed in the morning I started
getting emails from teachers asking me
why I hadn’t turned in papers or
homework assignments when the incomplete
of assignments were sitting at the
bottom of my backpack I quit all my
sports skipped all of my clubs and ended
up spending the rest of my freshman year
on a psychiatrist couch now I’m sure you
guys have all heard the story before
right I mean maybe you’ve even
experienced it
textbook overachievers mental health
takes a nosedive he or she reach their
life and learned how to battle with
depression and anxiety and emerge as a
stronger and more balanced person like a
butterfly out of a cocoon I mean it’s a
lifetime movie but the question that
we’re not asking enough and the question
that desperately needs an answer is why
have we heard the story so many times
and the answer to that ties into the
psychological trap of overachievement
culture this philosophy permeates into
and over to I mean we are all brilliant
students but we are brilliant students
that turn test scores into social
currency and who brag about getting
three hours of sleep and perhaps it’s a
little bit more worrying is that we are
not alone in this by subscribing to the
belief that the more you do the better
off you are
our generation becomes hyper focused and
hyper competitive and as a result we set
ourselves up for a slew of problems in
short our ambition is such a powerful
tool but we’re using it wrong I’m really
sorry like that was a lot to throw at
you guys if it helps it’s like not your
fault you guys are probably taught from
a young age like over achievements
supposed to be a good thing I mean we
see it everywhere from magazine articles
that praised multitasking to the laundry
list of honors needed for the perfect
college app so where exactly does doing
it all go wrong well for starters and
you all probably knew this one over
achievement often comes at the expense
of a healthy mind a 2010 study from San
Diego State University reports that five
times number of high school students
have reported having depression and
anxiety as compared to the counterpart
to the 1920s and 30s then I put this
fact in historical context the 1920s and
30s are known as the Great Depression
just think about it the diseases that
stem from overachievement culture come
from a need for validation students
ultimately just need to prove that they
are enough to each other to their
parents even to themselves for a
devastating example let’s take a look
across the country in Palo Alto which is
clear Stanford Territory a series of
devastating suicides committed by
seemingly happy popular talented kids
forced parents and educators to
reevaluate the environment in which they
are raising their children
Carolyn Wentworth a senior at Palo Alto
High School discussed her frustration
with the way that she felt everyone in
her life from school administration to
her own best friend dealt with the
pressure to achieve she said we are not
students we are lifeless bodies in a
system that breeds competition and
hatred and discourages teamwork and
genuine learning relax sincere passion
we are sick now back across the
continent I hear the sentiment all the
time
from my friends at home and especially
from my friends here I mean we talked
about how stressed out everyone here
makes us right we talked about how a
part of us cringes when we hear about
that freshman that took all of a Subject
Tests in eighth grade because we’ve only
taken two and we’re juniors we talk
about how part of us panics when we hear
about our friends amazing summer job
teaching English in Tibet because it’s
exactly the quirky unrelatable yet
relentlessly talented thing that college
admissions are looking for and then
instead of questioning why we feel this
way or whether or not we should we
basically go out to the world and do the
exact same thing now to make matters
worse the negative impact of
overachievement
doesn’t end when we get into college and
I’d like to take the time to express my
sincerest condolences to the seniors who
expected it – psychologist Adrienne firm
and explains that overachievers desire
for perfection and accomplishment
actually leaves them feeling vulnerable
and haunted by an overall sense of
failure despite their best efforts now
the traits that we cultivate in high
school will follow us through higher
education and into the workplace which
means that that feeling is going to
follow overachievers wherever they
failed
have it all whether that means getting a
bad grade on a paper or missing out in a
promotion so the question that were left
with now is what do we do about it
what can lead to about it how can we re
educate a generation of kids who have
been relentlessly taught that more is
better that more is the key to getting
into a good college and getting a good
job and earning a good life now my
battle with overachievement culture has
been long and complicated I’m still
working with it every day but what I
figured out so far at least is that it
comes down to three major areas and I’d
say if you can accomplish at least one
of these then you’re off to a pretty
good start first redefine achievement
over achievement culture promises that
the more you do the better off you are
now here’s the thing overachievement
does not equate to high achievement high
achievers are described by slates and
our CEO fort interactive as strategists
they know when to wait when to attack
when to sacrifice and when to change
direction they achieve their victories
on nonlinear paths and now here’s the
good news for you high achievers are
actually more likely to be promoted in
the workplace and are genuinely thought
of as leading happier healthier and more
productive lives in short high
achievement not over achievement is the
key to a good life now second and
perhaps equally as important is the idea
that we do not achieve alone we do not
exist in a vacuum with our trophies and
our certificates removed from everyone
else
remember Carolyn Wentworth the senior
from Palo Alto she expressed her
distaste at the fact that her school
bred competition and discouraged
teamwork now remember your friends with
the summer job in Tibet encouraged her
love her support her and be proud of her
accomplishments because get this you can
be proud of your own – you have enough
pride in yourself to share it remind
your friends of that remind strangers
sitting in silent of that remind the
scared little eighth grader that you’re
giving a tour to of that your peers are
not your enemies
for achievement culture damages us and
insulates us in a quiet and insidious
way the more you talk about your
achievements and the more you talk about
them in a positive light the more you
can turn your ambition from a prison
into a tool now finally and perhaps most
importantly but in my opinion the
hardest thing to do know when to stop
all of us at andover have ambition all
of our generation has ambition but
relentless ambition is almost synonymous
with over achievement here is my honest
advice to you take breaks let things go
I really mean it on this one let things
go choose what you love and pursue what
you love and value those accomplishments
and maybe I mean with the spare time
that you guys have saved yourself from
taking all those breaks and letting
things go you can watch Legally Blonde
it really is a good movie thank you very
much [Applause]