air begins with me each of you are you
afraid of me are you afraid of the big
black man that’s standing in front of
you when you see my last name do you
understand that I’m more than just image
could you predict that my mother is
white there she is if you can’t tell we
have pretty striking resemblance did you
understand that my father and mother had
clashing cultures throughout my life
that made it impossible for me to
understand who I was from the very
beginning I remember my first day of
kindergarten I had this sense of pride
my father had this deep ganea knack sent
and he always wanted me to understand
where I came from I was Ashanti I was
ganea I was more than just another
person and so when i walked in i was
excited just like any other
five-year-old child I couldn’t wait for
my opportunity start making friends and
tell people all about who I was and how
I like to play and so when it got to my
turn to speak I stood proudly I said my
name is none Aqua sea and for a moment I
felt like I was on top of the world but
in the next moment when another kid
sitting right next to me pointed at me
and said you’re just an African booty
scratcher I immediately begun to break
down you see I’ve lived in constant
paranoia of not knowing who I am of
understanding my purpose or
understanding my ability to relay Who I
am past what I’m wearing a constant
paranoia of being pulled over by the
wrong belief and so when I feel like I’m
doing too much
it’s really about protecting myself this
three-piece suit is probably doing too
much but it was like a bulletproof vest
for me it made me feel comfortable it
made me feel as if you could just listen
you see my mother always called me fuzzy
wuzzy and I felt like a teddy bear I
mean are you afraid of me do I look like
a teddy bear or am I threat I couldn’t
understand by just being from where I
was I didn’t always fit in with
everybody I grew up with but very
quickly post crack epidemic washington
DC gave me tough skin and so when i
matriculated to 7th through 12th grade
along with the upper ten percent of the
entire united states in washington DC at
the marais school i felt as if i had
been hardened already i felt as if i had
a purpose and a mission I had to
infiltrate the system and I had to make
my way you see neither of my parents had
gone to college at least traditionally
my mother eventually did while taking
care of her mother in her mid-twenties
and so she went to college and she also
happened to be working at the same time
but for my family this was an
opportunity so amazing so ridiculous so
unfathomable that there were tears of
joy tears of joy that was short-lived
and the reason was because I couldn’t
understand whether i need it to be fresh
prince how many of you here have watched
the freshman fidelity it’s based
majority a majority of it is based on
the difference between two main figures
will and Carlton and will happens to be
from an underserved community of west
philadelphia born and raised
and Carlton is a privilege and unable to
really see the struggles that will is
going through until much later as the
seasons continue to develop and so I
began to try to shield myself with
things that my family couldn’t afford I
had to have the pole I had to dress
preppy I had to look like everybody else
and my family quite frankly couldn’t
afford it but my parents made a way for
me to feel comfortable for me to have a
shell for me to feel that sense of pride
that my father had tried to instill in
me when he told me your ashanti big an
an and I remember very clearly all of a
sudden I had all of these opportunities
to do things that I wanted I could sing
in the choir I could play sports and one
particular day at the beginning of the
fall football season in seventh grade I
remember my little round self jogging
out onto the field super excited to be
able to play sports in full attire I
mean I’ve been playing football in the
street for years just tossing a pigskin
in between oncoming cars but I finally
had the opportunity to strap up and I
felt like I was going to make a huge
impact on my life I was headed to the
NFL but I was immediately defeated
because my coach started to put pieces
of tape on everybody’s helmets the bats
of their helmets so that he could
remember our names and in so doing as
you can see my last name is pretty long
he started to write an acronym first the
0 then the w I thought a is he going to
call me mr. Oh w but he added the two
E’s at the end and began to I guess
affectionately call me Alli now most of
the people that I went to high school in
middle school with think of that term as
affectionate but it took me almost 12
years later to understand that I was
different I wasn’t a Johnson I wasn’t
Thompson I wasn’t someone who they could
relate to immediately and so to be
brought in I had to be given a title I
wanted to be accepted and as i continue
to develop i continue to understand that
in order for me to be accepted i had to
start changing my identity i had to be a
different person than I was in my
neighborhood but I still had to be cool
and my father and I got into it severely
so many times about me losing sight of
who I was where I was from what the
mission was at him again remember no one
in my family and my nuclear family had
gone to traditional college and so this
was an opportunity that meant so much to
our family but at what cost and so as I
was making my way through I would have
these back and forth with my dad I felt
as if I was smarter he didn’t finish
high school so he could never help me
with my homework and my mother who had a
different culture and was much more
understanding had to supplement the cost
of his disability and so we were talking
past each other just within our home but
when my father died when I turned 15 I
was able to move past that towards the
goal of getting to college and I very
clearly remember the day when I got the
call from the posse foundation and
Grinnell College letting me know that I
had been accepted that I would be on my
way to school all tuition taking care of
I’ve never cried more tears of joy in my
life and that moment forever shaped by
by the time I’d got into college my
sense of being my purpose my
representation for my younger brother
overshadowed all of the fears that I had
of being able to fall in line with
people who were pretty much sure that
they were going to college their entire
life
I had gone to private school and had
this sense of an ability to be able to
actually speak with and dine with and
play with and go to harris with tons of
different people from all over the world
and so when Senator Tom Harkin appeared
on my campus I wasn’t afraid I saw it as
an opportunity I began to have more and
more of those opportunities stacking
them on top of each other but I also
began to understand that my duality was
taking a new form I was becoming the
token black men I was becoming that
voice of diversity the one that’s always
great to hear were at the end of a
conversation but never in the middle the
ideas that would help to be more
inclusive until they were too loud but I
also began to understand that I had a
purpose and the image of that plan and
that purpose came through my inspiration
to work for president barack obama you
see I finally had someone to aspire to
be like another biracial
african-american man who is well
educated and had beat the odd and so I
embarked on a whole journey of
understanding this purpose in the
position of wanting to be a public
servant and I took on a great
opportunity of working for him in
Dubuque Iowa shortly after graduating
bunnell college and truly began to
understand just how much potential I had
in bringing different types of people
together for a common goal you see I
started to understand that my duality
didn’t have to be one of a dichotomy I
didn’t always have to switch my
personality in fact I could be both and
I started to punch in started to code
set of code switch so when Freddie gray
was killed mercilessly by people
officers in 2014 I had the courage to
lead a protest on the steps of the US
House of Representatives with a number
of other young people old people black
people white people blue purple for this
sense of connectedness boards human
dignity black lives matter my life
mattered but more importantly I refuse
to sit on the sideline as I continued to
see the recreation of the 60 but
furthermore I had this interesting
situation that I had to deal with
individual after all I had made it so
far out of my situation that how could I
stop I mean this was an opportunity to
get both publicity and conduct some
public service in fact i can remember
plenty of people who use it specifically
for that but I understood that my
purpose was deeper than so I continued
to ask myself how do we grow I mean
police brutality racism prejudice those
aren’t new things and I was fortunate
enough to have been educated through a
pretty liberal and social education that
allowed me to understand that you know
equality existed I mean sometimes I ask
myself how we could possibly still be
fighting over a national anthem that
celebrates slavery I mean it’s in the
third stanza of course that no one else
really learns these days but how far
have we really come you see the problem
begins with those who have in those who
don’t and understanding our ability to
get what we would like starts at a very
fundamental level we’re supposed to be
the best nation in the world but 32
million adults in the u.s. can’t read
and in DC we’re on from nine percent of
true DC residents which happened to be
seventy-five percent
of color don’t even finish college in
six years I had an opportunity but how
would I move forth without looking back
and I also began to understand that I
was up against a completely new beasts
see the internet had given the younger
generation a sense of an ability to make
things happen at a much quicker pace and
so I had this frustration through social
media your snapchat through Facebook a
sense of purpose the sense of urge that
needed to be gratified instantly and I
would fight and our toil all kinds of
people that I would work with or under
because they looked at me as the short
side of millennial I mean sure my points
were great but how was I going to see
things through how could they possibly
pass the torch to someone like me when
they couldn’t even retire they were
focusing on things like social security
and I are raised never quite thinking
about investing into our bench into our
future moreover how was I going to fight
this chain of conservatism that I found
myself falling into you how was I going
to fight feeling better than the people
that I’d grown up with but the community
surrounding me constantly but I began to
understand that my opportunity was more
than just for me someone else had
invested in my human dignity someone
else had seen me as more than just that
little black boy more than just the
Ghanaians the half white male more than
a teddy bear and even more than a threat
they understood that that dignity that
they gave me that I started to
understand that resonated within me was
a path to social mobility and if my path
could be created so many other paths
could be as well and so my network began
to expand
and even though I didn’t start off
having a Bentley we’re going on all the
cool trips that all of my friends did I
had equity I could see the playing field
that I was working and I had opportunity
and I began to understand that with
opportunity I was using my duality in
all of these different circles to bring
people together to innovate to talk with
each other with the intent of listening
but listening without a response you see
I started to understand that I had
directly benefited from equity sure laws
can be made that say that everybody can
walk through the same for boss can be
made that ensure that every child has
the opportunity to get to school but
what about all of the other things what
about all of the parents that can afford
the tutor what about all of the parents
that are able to put their kids into
karate and basketball and ballet and
piano but those factors possibly add to
social capital could those factors have
been the difference between my success
and so many who had not made it out of
my neighborhood but how do we advocate
so often our fear has us wearing an
invisible cloak where we just want to
make it at least that’s how I feel where
I want to be accepted where I want to be
seen even and on an even playing field
regardless of who else is with me my
mindset obviously changed but so much of
that unlearning and that hurt had to
happen through my experiences and so as
I worked in electoral politics with all
different types of people and worked as
a legislative assistant on Capitol Hill
creating policies that I wanted to see
come to fruition so that we could create
better levels of equity I started to ask
myself what can I do without a
constituent how do I stand up to a
corporation or a pack or international
donor or billionaire or special
interests that have nothing to do with
human dignity but simply restoration you
see I started to understand that I was
getting ahead of myself I had to relearn
and understand that our coexistence had
to be more our our coexistence had to be
one of collaboration I’m of the firm
belief that we are at a time in our life
where our electoral process our
democracy our freedom our liberties and
our overall belief in our nation are at
stake see we can have the same outcomes
that we’ve had for centuries and
centuries rolling our feet in the mud
trying to move something like Fred
Flintstone or we can start to have
conversations that expose the truth of
America that the little black boy just
might have ideas that the rich white boy
doesn’t because I didn’t have and
through that innovation through those
conversations we can start to think
about creating pathways we can start to
think about innovation and technology
that will move us to a place where our
respect for each other is truly based on
our ability to perform we can hover we
can float they don’t always have to walk
you see I believe that deconstructing
prejudice is begins at home and in the
school but more importantly it begins
with neighbors having conversations and
to take it a step further every single
one of you all who are listening have to
ask yourself have you ever been
uncomfortable when you’re looking at
someone who doesn’t look the same as you
are you uncomfortable are you afraid
those conversations are where we can lay
the foundation for stronger conversation
and as we get older we’ve got to
understand that when we vote it’s not
just about ticking a box we have to hold
our local elected officials counter in
order to have a rippling effect the
President of the United States has very
little ability to control your life but
your city councilman who you can push to
sit in police meetings or kindergarten
classes or local food banks or even
homes for the aging those are the people
that can truly have an impact those are
the people who can watch the investments
that are being pulled together go to the
right place go to people and not
institution and not buildings and not
based on your income you see community
building can replace our fears with
excitement and I believe that if all of
us remember that we will start to form
it will start to place those who are
unable to see on our shoulder so that
that fence is even and when enough of a
stack each other on our shoulders we can make a puncture from with thank